Come to my place
Alone, plz
We need to talk

I stare at David’s messages on my phone for what feels like the millionth time, still half dressed.God, it's really happening isn't it? I wasn’t prepared for it so soon! I figured we would keep dancing around things for a few more months! 

It was just like him to want to get straight to the point when it came down to it. Always no nonsense, no need to wait. Something had to be done and he was going to do it. Not that I don’t admire that about him, but couldn’t he have given me a few weeks to waffle about it first?

At least it gave me a pretty big distraction from the failed hit a few days ago. I was shocked that Basilisk didn’t chew us out completely for the fuck up. He just dismissed us so he could design a plan to salvage things on his own. Although the look of disappointment in us on his face was probably worse than any tearing down he could do. We really screwed everything up. I don’t know what’s more terrifying honestly, the conversation I’m about to have with David, or whatever nightmare we’re going to have to do to get that tech now that it’s totally locked up, but they absolutely know we’re coming for it.  

I put my phone down and pinch my eyes. Whatever, focus! That’s future Girlie’s problem. Decide what to wear already! I stare up at my open wardrobe. I don’t know why I gravitated towards it instead of just my normal everyday clothes. It’s such a shame I haven’t gotten to wear any of this stuff since my memorabilia heists (and thus my costume) got an upgrade, though. A good chunk of that change went to filling it out, after all. It feels like such a waste for it to keep collecting dust. I know it’s a stupid idea, but part of me is giggling at the idea of showing up at David’s place in one of my disguises. Y’know, give him a real shock right out the gate!

I sigh, locking it up again. There’s no need to be stupid and reckless about things like that. Besides, what if I’m somehow wrong about him? What if he’s just, like, trying to tell me his great grandma died or something? Extremely unlikely, but still possible. Best to play safe until it’s a sure bet.

I give up fussing and throw on my jacket over my only nice button up, and pull my gloves on. I know any further guessing what to wear is just stalling at this point, and I look plenty sharp enough. You can’t blame me, though, it’s scary! It’s not every day that you confess to someone that you have a crush on them two times over.

Honestly, I feel dizzy, lightheaded. But also giggly and full of energy and like I could just shoot off to the moon. There’s a million ways this could go. Finally getting to just, move past flirting, to something real. No more hiding who we are, what we want. Being able to lift his mask up before a hit and steal a quick kiss…

I bite my lip to prevent myself from squealing right here in the middle of the street. I can hardly wait to get there already. A spring finds its way into my step, despite the overcast weather. I practically dance my way the rest of the distance, head nodding and hips swaying to the song in my head and the pounding of my heart. 

I reach his place, doing a for-real twirl at the door to finish off my walk, giggling like an idiot. I reach up, knocking on the door repeatedly, swaying back and forth as I wait, twiddling with the edge of my nice shirt. I never wear this stuff really, as uncomfortable as it tends to be. But I wanna look nice for him. I wonder if David dressed up for me too? Seeing him in a crisp suit, or a cute little bow tie, or maybe even just with a tight tee stretched over his…

David opens his door, still clad in the same sweats he was wearing the other day. They look stained a little, too. Really? I mean, okay man. He really could make anything look good, but I don’t think he needs to take it like a challenge. 

He gives me a cautious, but friendly smile. “Hey Jason. You look really nice.”

I smile back, walking my way into his place, casually throwing my jacket over the chair that sat entirely too near the door for no reason at all. I resist the urge to lean up and peck him on the cheek on my way through. Barely. “Hey,” I say back. “You look comfortable.” 

He laughs, sitting down on his couch. “Please, have a seat.” He has the lights off, which makes sense as it’s the middle of the day. But with the clouds out and the windows drawn, the room (and the rest of his house) is dim. He motions in front of himself, and I settle into the chair opposite him. 

“So,” I say, “what exactly did you want to talk about, big guy?”

He winces, then chuckles to himself softly. “Sorry, dude. I’ve just had a lot on my mind lately.”

“Yeah, me too.” 

“So.”

“So.”

He leans back into the couch, hands scrunching up in front of his face, running his fingers through his hair. “Damn. I thought this would be easier to say.” 

A long, pregnant pause hung in the air, neither of us saying anything. I can’t let it keep going on like this. I lean forward, brushing my bangs out of my eyes. “You like me, don’t you?” 

He flushes deep red, but slowly nods. “Yeah. Yeah, I do. I have for a long time, actually. But, like, things never felt like the right time to say anything.” He gets up and starts pacing back and forth. “You know. First it was school, us being dumb kids not ready for anything. Then there was that whole thing with your parents, I didn’t want to make anything worse. And then college got in the way, then jobs, and then and then and then… I don’t know, there was always an excuse. We felt like we were starting to live in very different worlds.” 

I lean forward, my chin resting on my hands propped up by my elbows. “And now?”

“And now,” he turns to me, smile bright on his face, “it doesn’t seem like those worlds are actually so far apart anymore. I think you would understand what I’m about to say. I was always afraid that you wouldn’t, you know? Not rationally, I know, I know. I’m not accusing you of anything, dude. But still, I was too afraid to say anything. That if you saw my other side, you’d leave me.” 

I get up, grabbing his arm softly. “But I have seen it, right?”

He bites his lip, looking down at me. “Fuck, dude. Everyone has! And at first it was exhilarating, freeing. Exciting! But then everything stopped being a game and, I don’t know. Things started getting harder, and coming home here was harder, and I was hiding so much from you that, I just… I couldn’t live with myself. That’s why I held back so much.”

He lets go of me, backing up away, giving himself distance. “I dunno, maybe I’m just convincing myself of seeing things that aren’t there because it would be easier for all the pieces to fall in place on their own. But you know what? Even if I’m wrong, I’m sick of living like this. Why do I need to keep hiding the best thing that ever happened to me? Just because I’m afraid of things changing? That’s just letting everything rot out from below us. Maybe I want things to change. Maybe I’m sick and tired of the way things are.” 

I had no idea this was tearing him up so badly. Just how long had he been hiding this? “David,” I say, “I know exactly what you’re going through. Everything you’re saying, it’s just…” I try walking towards him, but he lifts his hand, motioning me to stop. It’s shaking.

He backs up again, shifting us around so that he is in the widest space outside the seats, myself almost as his audience. “Please. I should go first. I called you here after all. And… I don’t know, it could be a lot.” He looks down, hand clenching over his heart. “Just, please promise it’ll be okay to tell you.” 

I try to smile reassuringly, gesturing at him to go ahead. “Please, it’ll be okay. Go ahead and say it.”

He breathes in deep, trying to steady himself. “I think it will be easier to just show you, actually. Rip the bandaid off all at once, right?” He takes a few more deep breaths, both hands over his face, before one long last exhale as he… As he starts…

No.

No!

No, no, no, no, nononono…

He, he can’t, he…

I step back, the floor spinning under me. I feel like I’m going to throw up. “David? You're…” 

She runs her hand through her hair, sheepishly staring down at the floor. “I’ve, uh, actually been toying with going by Wanda…”

My legs give out, and I collapse into the couch behind me. I genuinely feel faint. This isn’t how things were supposed to go! David was supposed to be my knight in shining armor, the one saving me from everything! Not, not… “You… You’re Shiftra?”

She sat down across from me in the empty chair, wrapping her arms around herself, gripping onto the folds of her baggy sweater. “I told you it was a lot.” 

Shiftra. The woman who would stop at nothing to kill me. I see flashes of her face, screaming, scowling, her stabbing me right in the heart. That cannon pressed directly against my jaw, her seconds away from popping my skull apart. Repeatedly, the images flash in my mind over her, before settling on her actual, concerned face. 

“Jason?” She looks scared. “Things are okay, right?” She bites her lip, and now I see flashes of David over her, just now how worried he seemed, how crushed he was when his family split up, the concern on his face when he saw what, well, he did to me. 

I shut my eyes tight as I can, bite the inside of my cheek until it’s bloody, and then get up, reaching down to pull her up with me. “I’m sorry. It’s okay, yeah! It was just, a real shock.” 

Her face absolutely lights up, and instead of grabbing my hand she springs up and hugs me tight, swinging me in a circle. “Oh, thank you, thank you! That is such a relief. You have no idea how terrifying this was!” 

She puts me down and now I feel like fainting from how dizzy I am. “Eh! Yeah, was! Glad that’s over now right! Nothing anyone could be terrified of  anymore.” Certainly not that the woman with a gun to your head days ago is… 

Christ, I almost came over in disguise. What the fuck were you thinking, Jason? Stupid! How could I have been so stupid…

She giggles, clapping her hands together. “I knew you would get it. You’re, like, the greatest guy I know. You’ve always been so sweet and caring about everyone, there really wasn’t anything to worry about, was there? There’s a reason I always meant to tell you first whenever I dreamed about doing this…” 

“I’m, uh, glad you thought of me.” 

“Look, Jason. I know this might take a lot of time to adjust, you don’t have to put on a brave face for me. But, like, you really don’t get how much better everything is right now. I can’t keep hiding this. I mean, I’m going to obviously keep hiding the superpowers, there’s identity regulations and all that. But, you know alllll about that right?” She winks at me, and I get a sinking feeling in my guts. “But as soon as I figure out a new civilian identity, I seriously think it’ll be time to put ‘David’ away for good. I mean, if you think it’s a good idea?” 

I chew on my tongue, mouth dry. “I mean, if that’s what you want. Of course? Who would I be to try and stop you, right?” She squeals and picks me up again, but I squirm against it. “Please don’t spin again! I’m already super dizzy.” 

She giggles, putting me down. “Still, thank you so much. I couldn’t do this without you, honestly. Would you be there when I tell Kathrine? I don’t really have anyone else to tell about it, so it really won’t be too much effort. Oh my gawd, I should call her right now, actually! Could you text her and tell her to come–” 

“Whoa, hey!” I cut her off, waving my hands in front of my face. “Maybe we should have a gameplan before we just tell a civie that you’re, like, an alien or whatever.” 

“I'm not an alien,” she playfully scoffs. “Trust me, this is new to me too. I mean, not the idea of…” She gestures to herself and I blush hard and stare away from her. “But the powers were just this year. I found that sword and it just, gave me everything I’ve ever wanted. It’s like I won the fucking lottery, Jason. I’m sick of pretending I didn’t.” 

Huh. So it was the sword. That would explain… A lot, actually. I bite my lip. I wonder how many bets I could win on the form with that insider knowledge…

She nudges my shoulder. “Okay, dude. Your turn.” 

“M-my turn?”

She laughs. “Yeah! I showed you mine, now you show me yours. Don’t pretend that we both don’t know.” 

I back up again, eyes wide. Fuck, does she know? Has this whole thing been a trap? “I-I, I mean… Wha-what do you mean? I don’t, It’s not really like that…” 

She scoffs and rolls her eyes. “Oh come on! I mean, I had questions for a while now, and the stories line up too well. But it was that little thing,” she points to the pager on my belt that I instinctually claps over with my hand, “that really tipped me off. I swear, only a government agency would decide that pagers are a fine design for their tech in the modern day. I tried telling our superiors that it would stand out more than blend in nowadays, but it’s like pulling teeth with those babies.” CCHIP? She thinks I’m…

“Oh, I… I uh… You wouldn’t buy that I’m not ready to say it, uh, out loud, would you?’

She stands quietly for a moment, before she sighs and smiles, flicking my nose. “No, I get it. Don’t want to jinx the big promotion right on the edge of getting it, huh?” 

I scrunch my face up, feeling like I just sucked on a lemon. “Uh, maybe? Or maybe I just am not ready to let you down about, you know, how small time I am.” 

She laughs, futzing my hair around on top of my head. “Okay, okay, mister modest. You can take your time coming out, I won’t push you. After all, there’s just no way I would be consolable if I found out you were, oh, maybe a cute little hacker sidekick that I just so happened to keep running into at work…” 

I blanch, and she laughs, booping me on the nose. I glance down at a non-existent watch on my wrist. “Oh wow, is it that late already? Oh, I forgot, I actually gotta go do, uh…” 

She smiles playfully at me, hooking her hands up into finger quotes. “Coffeeshop?” 

“Uh yeah, ‘Coffeeshop’. Great chatting and all, but I have to go!” 

I grab my coat and hussle my way to the doorway, but stop as I reach the exit, looking back at her, frowning slightly, gripping at her elbow. “Uh, hey. Wanda, right?” 

She smiles, blushing. “Yeah. Wanda.” 

I look down, feeling ashamed. “Okay, yeah. Thanks for trusting me, Wanda. I’ll try not to let you down.” 

I rush out before I could see her face or hear her reaction to that, running about as far as I could before I felt like she wouldn’t be hovering behind me, staring watching me, ready to sti…

I vomit, soaking some nice lady on the way’s bushes. Fuck. This is so fucked. I’m so fucked.