I stared at him wide eyed and disbelieving. I couldn’t quite process the idea that he’d taught me how to make something so precious. The damage I’d done to my voice was significant and something I’d expected to spend a long time recovering from, if I could recover at all. If Estra was right, he’d given me something I could never repay him for.

“There’s still a possibility I’m wrong, as your vocal chords weren’t burnt, but I have very high hopes,” he informed me, not looking the least bit concerned, “I’ll receive the cup back from you tomorrow. Take your work home and reap the benefits. Whoever ends up with you as an apprentice will be very pleased. You have a natural talent for potion making.”

I left his tent in a daze, grinning stupidly as I tried not to spill any of the precious liquid as I made my way to my tent. Andrian was waiting for me inside and I excitedly began trying to explain to him what I had in the teacup I’d brought back with me. Once he understood what I was holding, I could see he was as excited as I was. He did his best not to let it show since we didn’t know if it would actually work, but I could see the glimmer in his eyes.

We settled into our sleeping bags and I drank my potion in one gulp. It tasted awful. It was possibly the most foul tasting concoction I’d ever put in my mouth. I could taste the bitter, earthiness of the ginseng but it was mixed with a sour flavor I didn’t recognize and something cloyingly sweet as well. I was glad I’d taken it in a single sip, as I doubted I would have had the strength to go back for another taste of the foul liquid.

I had a lot of trouble falling asleep that night. Other than the taste, I suffered no ill effects from the potion, but I couldn’t seem to calm my mind. After how tired I was earlier, it seemed a little unfair that now that I could finally get some rest, I couldn’t drift off. I was like a child the night before a big celebration. I wondered what my voice would sound like. Would it be the same voice I used when I spoke to Amelie inside the fog? I wondered if the potion would even work. I knew I needed to sleep to find that out, but it was impossible to lay my mind to rest.

Inevitably, I drifted off sometime late into the night. The next morning I awoke to daylight and the chirping of birds. Andrian had already left the tent and I could tell I'd overslept. I sat up and touched my throat. I was nervous and excited

“Hah,” I said, testing how my voice sounded. There was no pain, no coughing, and my voice was smooth and clear.

“Aaaaaahh,” I tested it again with a longer sound and was pleased with the results. A smooth and clear baritone voice came out of me, one that showed no hint of raspiness. The potion had worked. My first thought was that I needed to find Andrian.

I freed myself from my sleeping bag and practically flew out of the tent. All four of my companions were sitting around the cooking fire and looked up as if they’d been expecting me.

“Well?” Estra immediately inquired.

I smiled broadly and nodded. Everyone looked at me expectantly and I realized they were waiting for me to say something. I immediately felt shy, even though I had often used my broken voice in front of them. But that didn’t matter, because the first proper words I was going to say wouldn’t be for the whole group anyway. I wanted to talk to Andrian first.

“Oh my, Falyn,” Luxania called out in a teasing voice, “are you being shy with us?”

The tips of my ears turned red at her casual jest but I ignored it. I shook my head and gestured that she should wait a moment. I grabbed hold of Andrian’s arm and led him a short distance away, toward a thicket of tall trees. Once we were hidden behind the large trees, I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him close.

With my mouth close to his ear, I softly said, “Andri, I love you.”

Andrian stiffened at the sound of my voice before pulling me into an almost bone crushing embrace. Speaking into my shoulder with an emotional voice, he asked, “Did you bring me over here to tell me that?”

“I wanted those to be the first words I said and I wanted to say them to you and you alone,'' I explained when I could breathe again. “I’ve waited a long time to be able to say this properly. I love you. Thank you for not giving up on me.”

Andrian caressed my cheek with his palm and I closed my eyes, leaning into his touch. “I almost feel like I’m dreaming,” he whispered, “hearing you say those words like this… it feels too good to be true.” When I opened my eyes again, he was staring at me with intense eyes. “Say it one more time?”

I couldn’t help but laugh indulgently at his childish request. Still, I complied and replied, “Now that I can say it, I’ll say it whenever you want to hear it. I love you Andri. Now and in the future, you’re mine.”

“One more time,” he demanded, “I can’t get enough of hearing you say those words with that beautiful voice of yours.”

I stepped forward, causing him to take a step backwards. His back was pressed against one of the large trees and I pressed my body against his, trapping him in place. I smiled up at him and said, “I love you. You’re mine. Is that enough? You want to hear it again? I love you Andri–”

I’d have continued, but he cut off my words with his lips, pressing them against mine. I surrendered without hesitation, nibbling at his lips and clinging to him tightly. It was worth the slight embarrassment earlier to have this moment with him. I’d done my best to express my affection with my limited speech thus far, but it felt amazing to be able to freely speak my feelings to him. The soft kisses and caresses continued for some time with the words ‘I love you’ occasionally being exchanged between us. For a brief moment in time, nothing existed but Andrian and the sounds of the surrounding jungle.

When we finally separated our lips long enough to catch our breaths, I realized that I was truly happy. Hidden in this patch of trees, deep in the jungle of the Beastlands, and far from everything I’d even known, I was happier than I’d ever dreamed I’d be. I was free from my father's abuse, I’d found my voice again, and I had my perfect partner by my side. On the other side of the trees were three people who had shown me kindness and friendship, and there were so many others who I was grateful to have met. So much of the past that had tormented me felt like it no longer mattered. There were some things that would stay with me forever, of course, but I felt prepared to bear those burdens. There was so much to live for now, even if there were still hardships to come.

Hand in hand, Andrian and I walked back over to our campsite. Having said what I wanted to say to Andrian, I was ready to speak in front of the others too. Estra bragged on my behalf that I had made the potion with my own two hands, under his enlightened guidance, of course. I savored the feeling of having my accomplishments and well being celebrated. It was probably nothing special, just how people who care about someone would normally act, but the normalcy of it was exactly what made it extraordinary for me.

The rest of our journey to the trading city passed by quickly. It was another five nights and six days of travel but I was content to just take in the unfamiliar landscape and enjoy the company of my traveling companions. If it weren't for the joining ceremony that awaited us in the trading city, I would have liked for the trip to be a little longer.

Other than the night I took the potion, when everyone conspired to let me sleep uninterrupted, I awoke with Andrian before the dawn to take the final watch. Normally the watches were done in rotation, so everyone would get a turn on the better shifts, but we were given an exception so I could practice swordsmanship with Andrian each morning before we departed. However, after each brutal session, I wondered if they were really doing me all that much of a favor.

From the fourth through the sixth movement of ascent, I spent my time in agony under the tyranny of the man who claimed to love me. He pushed me until my muscles ached, left no margin for error, and treated me with none of his usual kindness and consideration. At one point, he even yelled at me. The only reason I didn't burst into tears right then and there was because he called me "soldier," so I could convince myself that he wasn't really mad at me and it was just a part of training.

However brutal, his methods worked. Much to my pleasure, I could feel a difference from the very first morning we spent together training. It wasn’t a huge difference, but I had all the time in the world to get stronger. Once training was over, Andrian would be right back to his normal self, offering to get me water or give me a massage. Deep down, I knew that the stark contrast between his two personalities was a sign that he was doing his best for me. Knowing he was taking me seriously made it worth being yelled at.

After our watch and training was over, everyone else would get up and start preparing for the day. When we broke camp in the morning or started a new one in the evening, duties were split up and rotated where possible, much like the watch. Everyone always did what they could and shared the burden fairly. I only rotated between dealing with the tents and cooking because I wasn’t strong enough to carry water and had no skill with horses.

Finally able to ask questions easily, I learned that the horses had special shoes on their hooves that needed to be cared for. They needed to be checked for possible health problems or parasites, and they also needed to be groomed. In the same way I was relegated to the tasks suited to me, it was only Shidah and Luxania that tended the horses, both well versed in the process. Since Shidah was also best suited for water gathering, he was never on cooking duty with me. Estra was generally relegated to the same duties as I, and Andrian often took Shidah’s place as the water gatherer when Shidah was tending the horses.

Luxania was the best cook out of everyone but it was the thing she avoided doing the most. She could produce delicious meals from our meager supplies and whatever she could scavenge from the forest, but she claimed to hate the whole process. After making us dinner one night, whilst complaining nonstop about doing it, she explained that being the oldest child in a large family meant she was the one responsible for feeding the little ones growing up. Always having to go home and prepare food while her siblings got to play had made her resent the whole process.

Since I enjoyed cooking, I was always willing to give her my tent duty if she asked me to trade. I discovered I was fairly good at cooking as well, though my simple meals couldn’t compare to Luxania’s skill. It only took a couple days for me to become adept at making flatbread on the grill. On the third day, I tried making my own flatbread recipe by adding sweet berries that Andrian had found near our camp to the dough. My idea was well received, but completely unoriginal. Mixing berries, fruits, and even vegetables into flatbread dough was common and certainly not a new idea. But at least everyone enjoyed it.

After dinner, I would join Estra in his tent, but there were no longer any discussions of treatment. We both agreed that I was doing fine on my own and left it at that. Instead, each night was a lesson in roots, flowers, and herbs. I was taught the names and medicinal properties of more plants than I could ever remember, and at the end of each visit I was shown how to make a potion. All of the potions I learned were very simple, with few ingredients to mix and minimal magic required. Of the lot, I was most proud of the healing potion I made on the third night, but a serum that would increase growth in a single plant was the one Estra claimed would be hardest. Both that serum and my healing potion were placed into proper bottles with corks and I was told we’d try them out later. I also had a potion I made on the first night that wasn’t meant to be used like a potion. Estra said it would provide endless light if the small bottle was never opened. It wasn't particularly bright, but it was better than a candle.

As the days passed, I found myself talking more and more. The first day I barely spoke once we were on the road, simply out of habit, but the others quickly caught on and began to include me in their conversations more actively than before. I was happy to be able to respond to them and be involved, but it felt strange at first because I was used to just listening and nodding my head when asked something.

With Andrian, however, it was an entirely different situation. I forgot all about my previous concerns and began actively telling him about everything that had happened to me over the years. He never judged me or blamed me and eventually I was even able to tell him the things I’d thought were too shameful to tell anyone. He listened to the stories of my darkest moments, shaking with an unspeakable rage, and he held me as I cried when I was done. The more I talked, the more I felt free of the shackles those experiences had placed on me.

Our late night conversations eventually turned to Andrian’s own experiences as well. He’d struggled a lot over the years, though in very different ways. When he’d made his intent to pursue me known, he’d dealt with a lot more backlash than I’d previously been told. Some went so far as to call him a traitor for daring to refer to a human as his mate, though they were a very small minority. The majority of his acquaintances, however, treated him as mentally ill and discouraged his efforts. After being called obsessed and repeatedly being told that I 'ran away from him' and I would 'undoubtedly reject him and run away again', he almost began to believe it himself.

But in spite of all that, there were others, like Rastari and Shidah, who had actively supported him and helped him along the way. Shidah, who was bonded to his mate, understood Andrian’s struggle better than most and was a source of silent support throughout the process. Rastari, despite his reputation, apparently claimed to be a romantic and was the one who insisted that Andrian be allowed to come. I felt an undeniable gratitude to both of them for their part in bringing us together.

On the morning of the fifth day, we emerged from the jungle as if from a dream. The lush vegetation and tall leafy trees had created a comfortable environment with plenty of shade. Outside the jungle, however, was an open area with only the occasional tree or bush scattered about, leading to a white horizon off in the distance. The sun beat down on us relentlessly, and I pulled up my hood to protect my skin from burning.

“We’ll reach the start of the desert tonight,” Shidah informed me as I marveled at the wide open space. “Where we are now is sort of a middle ground between the great forest and the desert. Be very wary as we travel here, as we have no cover. If there are any monsters waiting out there, they'll be able to hide from us, but they'll definitely see us coming.” I shuddered a little at his advice, but nodded. What little training I’d had would be of no use against a monster. In fact, I was still relegated to the wooden practice sword and had yet to handle a real one. For this trip, I would have to accept being protected the whole way.

We continued along the road as it led us into the desert. When the sun reached its zenith, we paused for lunch in the shade of a grove of trees. After we ate and drank as much water as our stomachs could hold, Estra informed me it was time to test the serum I made. He said that this was the perfect landscape to test it on, as many plants would struggle to survive once the worst heat of the summer hit. He led me over to a cluster of small flowers growing over a patch of flat rock.

“This flower is a type of desert ivy that helps hold moisture in the ground during the driest part of the season,” Estra explained, “so if we can make this grow a bit bigger, it’ll help the plants in the area to survive the coming season. Don’t expect anything too impressive though. This is a minor potion and a minor boost to the ecosystem.”

With low expectations set, I pulled out the correct potion bottle and asked, “Do I just pour it on the plant?”

“Essentially, yes,” Estra answered, “if you look here, you’ll see a crack in the rock. This is where they are growing from, so if you pour it here, the serum should reach the roots.”

Nodding to his instructions, I pulled the cork out of the bottle and carefully poured the thick brown liquid into the crack. The potion was so unattractive that I’d originally thought I’d made it wrong, but Estra assured me that potions for plants and animals often looked like this. The slimy, mud-like substance oozed into the crack and disappeared.

We watched for a moment and nothing happened. Just as I was about to give up on seeing any results, the rock began to split open and a wave of the flowering ivy poured out. I jumped back to avoid obstructing its path as it spread out in all directions. It was over almost as soon as it started and the ivy now extended about five feet from the original crack. In the scope of the desert, this was indeed a minor effect, but to me it was huge. This lush green ivy and its small purple flowers were the result of my efforts and magic. It was a powerful and rewarding feeling.

“Feels good, doesn’t it?” Estra asked as he surveyed my results, “knowing that you can cause such significant changes to the earth. That is the power of the shaman.”

“It’s amazing, actually,” I admitted, “seeing what a single potion can do, it makes me want to create more and see what else I can do.”

“I’m glad to hear it. Actually, we’ll inevitably be parting ways after your joining ceremony, but where will you and Andrian be going after that? Perhaps I can recommend some like-minded folks that would be intrigued by the idea of taking on a human apprentice.”

“Ha, you know, I actually have no idea where we're going,” I told him with a laugh, “I never thought to ask about it. Perhaps back to the lion village, or maybe we might stay at the cabin? I assumed Andrian had a plan and didn’t worry about it.”

Estra shook his head at me and chuckled, “You really are just blindly following him wherever he wants to take you.”

“It’s not like I have an opinion about it. I don’t know the land and have nowhere I want to go. Anywhere is fine, as long as we go there together.” That’s what I said, but I was suddenly curious to know where our ‘anywhere’ was going to be. I’d have to ask Andrian sometime during the afternoon.

Unaware of my contradictory thoughts, Estra just muttered, “Ugh, truly spoken like a love besotted fool,” and shook his head at me.