Okay so... this project turned out a bit longer than I was expecting, so I cut it into two parts. Here is part 1 of my little Red Moon Falls holiday special! I hope you enjoy it!

 

 

Red Moon Falls (Episode 3 Part 1)

 

 

by

 

 

Elite Shade

 

 

[Sinister Intro Music]

ANNOUNCER: "In a world where sinister forces lurk in the shadows, where the truth is obscured by mystery, and where legends and nightmares hide and wait, there is a place where the paranormal and the unexplainable happen with unnerving frequency."

[Flashes of images of a blurry humanoid figure moving between trees in a forest, transitioning to images of lights in the sky above a desert.]

ANNOUNCER: "The town of Red Moon Falls. On the surface, it is a sleepy small desert community. Skulking just beneath this visage of Small Town America are paranormal powers at work. And there is only one person keeping the darkness at bay, a man who delves into the deep of the unknown to do battle."

[Fade to Black, followed by words in large red print reading 'Blood Moon Falls', before fading to black again.]

The camera fades in to Red Moon Falls' main street. Panning around reveals holiday decorations just about everywhere. Wreaths and red bows hanging from every street light. Shops with Santa, reindeer, snowflakes, snowmen, minoras, and other holiday imagery painted on their display windows. Colorful red and green and silver garland strands were strung about, and there was even a giant inflatable Frosty sitting on top of the Devlin theater, the Marquee displaying a 'Happy Holidays' in big bold black letters. The sidewalks were packed with cheering people, all dressed warmly, gathered on either side of the town's Main Street. Holiday-themed floats slowly passed by, along with a marching band.

The scene cuts to footage of Earl and Becky standing on the sidewalk, speaking to the camera.

EARL: "As you can probably tell, Red Moon Falls residents tend to come out in force to celebrate the holidays."

BECKY: "Well, it's not like you can blame us. Living in a town where a portal to an alternate world bathed in red sunlight and sightless screaming humanoids can open up down by the library on the fourteenth of every month means we need to enjoy what we can, while we can."

EARL: "Well... most of us here in town..."

BECKY: "This time of year is kinda a... hard time for Duke. No one really seems to know why, other than he gets a bit crabby when Christmas rolls around."

EARL: "That's putting it mildly."

Footage from a dashcam appears, showing a clearly intoxicated, and mostly blurred out Duke, sitting in front of a burning Christmas tree, his hands behind his back while a pair of deputies stand in front of him.

DEPUTY SANCHEZ: "So then what happened?"

DUKE: "So then, I lit up a joint and took some puffs, and managed to get that giant spider-octopus creature to slumber at the bottom of the lake for another three years. What part of that is so f[BLEEP]kin' hard for you two dumbf[BLEEP]ks to understand."

DEPUTY SIMPSON: "We get that part. But what does that have to do with you, laughing maniacally, and setting the Petersons' tree on fire?"

DUKE: "Oh, that... f[BLEEP]k if I know. I got really high on some awesome hash I was able to get and had a gas can... sh[BLEEP]t happens, I guess."

DEPUTY SANCHEZ: "Uh-huh... and you still insist that you weren't selling hash down by the community college earlier?"

DUKE: "Oh my f[BLEEP]kin' god, you assh[BLEEP]es are still harpin' on that?"

The footage cuts back to Earl and Becky.

EARL: "Last year was really bad, especially when he got into an altercation with one of our deputies during the charity raffle, and Duke refuses to see a therapist."

BECKY: "Well now, he never said he wouldn't go to any therapist. He just says that he thinks Doctor Malcolm is trying to steal his blood. Also, as bad as it was, Duke did prove that that was a doppelganger of Deputy Clever."

EARL: "Regardless. The town council and the sheriff have made it clear that they don't want any Dukenanigans to happen this year, so we set him up on a wild goose chase to keep him occupied for the rest of the day."

BECKY: "He was told that there was some buried cursed treasure out in the desert near the wildlife preserve. We're hoping he'll spend the day digging around and looking for it, all while gradually getting high and drunk and eventually passing out."

Earl puffs out his chest and smirks.

EARL: "That was my idea. I tactfully utilized his love of getting rich quick and literal treasure hunts, along with his need to drink and smoke the strong stuff in order to willingly do any kind of manual labor, that doesn't involve him getting in a fight and making a public ass of himself, in order to get the Duke-issue to neutralize itself before he could even properly pop off."

BECKY: "I still think that he should have had a couple deputies assigned to watch him and make sure he doesn't get bit by another snake. I always hate it when he passes out in the desert."

EARL: "That man is like a damn cockroach, Becky. Besides, thanks to that sentient tunnel incident, we can't spare the manpower."

BECKY: "I guess..."

The camera turns to focus on the current float going by. It was made to look like Santa's sleigh resting on a snowy hillock. There were decorative giant candy canes and nutcrackers and Christmas trees all around it, with an excited and jolly St. Nick sitting right in the aforementioned sleigh. The chubby older man with the ruddy cheeks and twinkling blue eyes was energetically waving to the crowd, bellowing out the classic 'Ho ho ho!', and reaching over to hand out presents to happy children with their arms outstretched.

EARL: "Looks like old Sammy is at it again."

Earl chuckles while Becky sips a paper cup of steaming hot chocolate.

BECKY: "He really is a man who loves to get into the spirit of the holidays."

EARL: "I'll say! I remember when I was a little kid, and old Sammy was the town Santa back then too! Gotta say, for a guy pushing 80, he's pretty dang spry."

Becky turns to look at the camera.

BECKY: "The town Santa is a tradition for Red Moon Falls. Basically, a volunteer collects toys purchased for underprivileged kids as well as the kids over at the Mary Beth Memorial Children's Hospital and hand delivers them all on Christmas Eve. Then, on Christmas Day, they help out at the church, handing out free food for needy families."

EARL: "And every year, Sam goes above and beyond, buying a bunch more toys and food to try and make sure everyone in town has a happy holiday."

There's a commotion over on the other side of the street.

EARL: "Oh geeze, I think I hear Duke."

Earl whips his own paper cup of hot cocoa into a nearby trash can in frustration while his partner finishes off hers before tossing the cup into the trash. The camera shakes a bit as it hurriedly follows the two deputies who are pushing their way through the crowd. Only to stop as several gasps can be heard. There, in plain sight, is Duke, now wearing a torn and slightly bloody orange sweater and jeans, climbing onto the float with Santa's sleigh.

DUKE: "Alright motherf[BLEEP]ker, you ain't getting away this time!"

From the speakers on the float, Jingle Bell Rock is playing, all while Duke is stepping towards Sam.

SAM: "Woah there, Duke. Now, I'm not sure what's got you all upset, but I'm sure that it's something that we can just talk out, and maybe not scare the kids, eh?"

Duke just looks at him, before swinging and hitting Sam in the side with a baseball bat.

SAM: "HOLY SH[BLEEP]T!!!"

The crowd screams as Sam tries to run, but Duke keeps swinging and hitting him with the bat. The sound of crying children can be heard. A good knock to the side of the head sends the old man crashing down onto the big burlap sack full of gifts. Sam groans, before kicking Duke right in the crotch. Duke groans and doubles over.

DUKE: "Dirty motherf[BLEEP]ker!"

EARL: "DUKE, DON'T MAKE ME TAZE YOU!!!"

Earls tries to climb onto the float, only to have Duke push him back off with one hand.

DUKE: "F[BLEEP]k off, Earl, I know what I'm doin'."

Duke turns to face Sam just as the older man is swinging a metal folding chair right into Duke's face, knocking him over. Duke is struggling to get to his feet when Sam brings the chair down again on his back. From a jacket pocket, Duke pulls out a hunting knife and lunges, plunging the blade down into Sam's left boot. Sam drops the chair and howls in pain, until Duke slams his fist into the old man's stomach.

Becky is jogging and gets a running leap to climb on, and is successful right when Duke sprays Sam with some clear liquid. He then takes a puff from his joint, and tosses it onto Sam's back. Just as the music from the speakers nears the end of the song, the liquid catches fire, and Sam begins to thrash and moan and scream, the camera turning to zoom in on the sobbing faces of a group of children watching the chaos unfold. Turning back, Earl is on the float trying to put Sam out using the sack of gifts, the flames starting to spread to the fake snow and two of the trees, all while Becky is cuffing Duke.

DUKE: "Keep the change, ya filthy animals!"

Duke laughs as he is led off by Becky and the camera fades to black.

[Commercial Break]

The picture fades back in, now with Duke standing in front of his truck, arms crossed, looking sullen. Standing next to him are Earl and Becky.

EARL: "Duke, do you understand that this here is the last straw? That any and all good grace you might've had with the sheriff and the council has been used up?"

DUKE: "Yes, Earl, I get it. After doing my f[BLEEP]kin' job that I never even wanted in the first f[BLEEP]kin' place to the best of my ability, I'm about to be punished."

Earl sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose.

BECKY: "Duke, you're right."

Both Duke and Earl turn to look at Becky with looks of surprise on their faces.

BECKY: "You were pretty much forced into this job being the town... supernatural specialist. And yes, it's good that you uncovered that Sam and a dozen other elderly people in town were actually all part of a cult that ritualistically sacrifices the young to extend their own lives. But, even you have to know how going about it like that in the middle of the parade and in front of a bunch of families and children was wrong."

Duke huffs and turns away.

EARL: "Duke."

DUKE: "Alright, fine, I guess I coulda been a little more discreet when I gave Sam his holly-jolly ass-whoopin'! Ya f[BLEEP]kin' happy!"

Duke whirls around, puffing on a joint.

DUKE: "So what's this community service sh[BLEEP]t that the good 'ol sheriff came up with instead of having me hauled off to jail?"

EARL: "It was actually Becky's idea."

Earl smirks and nods to his partner.

BECKY: "I simply suggested that since you... disrupted today's festivities, you should be the one to finish off Sam's former duties."

DUKE: "What? You want me to toss some children into a gaping maw in a pit in Mr. Farnickle's basement?"

EARL: "For gods' sake, Duke! She means the Santa stuff!"

DUKE: "Oh... you mean the presents? Didn't they get smashed?"

BECKY: "Those were for Sam to hand out during the parade. Here's the bag of presents for the less-than-fortunate families, along with a list of names and addresses."

DUKE: "Which probably made it easier for that creepy f[BLEEP]k to pick the next sacrifice."

Duke accepts a sheet of paper and a red and white striped cloth sack that he hefts into the bed of his truck.

BECKY: "And here's the bag of gifts for the children over at the children's hospital."

Duke sighs as he takes a bright green cloth bag, bulging with wrapped gifts.

DUKE: "You guys seriously think that this is a good idea?"

Duke shakes his head and takes a long drag from his joint.

EARL: "Personally, considering how you act during this time of year, I'm pretty sure that all those presents are going to end up in the nearest dumpster the moment we're not watching you, and you'll just go off and pass out somewhere."

DUKE: "Got me all figured out, dontcha?"

BECKY: "Guys, that's enough. Now, Duke, I really think that this could do you some good. Maybe help get you out of your seasonal funk."

DUKE: "I'm not in any seasonal funk."

Duke sets the green sack down next to the red and white striped one.

EARL: "Duke, the sheriff was serious about this. If you don't give all the kids on that list or at the hospital their gifts, he will have you charged and find someone to replace you."

DUKE: "Yeah, sounds like an easy trip outta this sh[BLEEP]thole."

BECKY: "Duke..."

DUKE: "I'm on it. Can I go now?"

EARL: "Sure... but first, maybe you'd like to tell me why there's blood splattered across your truck's hood, grill, and bumper?"

The camera jostles as it is moved over to the front of the truck to reveal a very large dark red splotch, with some bloody handprints being dragged off to the side.

DUKE: "... I hit a pigeon on my way over."

The camera cuts to black.

[Commercial Break]

The footage fades back in, now with Duke behind the wheel of his truck and driving through town, the sun starting to set.

DUKE: "Look, boom mic guy, this time of year just p[BLEEP]es me off, okay? If you're hoping for a deeper meaning behind that, you're gunna be hoping' for a good long while."

Duke cuts a corner, taking an especially long drag from his joint, casually flipping people off when he hears some honks, his finger being blurred during.

DUKE: "Peace on Earth and good will and all that nonsense... just a bunch of bullsh[BLEEP]t. This is the time of year I usually end up getting stabbed, impaled, hung, or on two instances, swallowed whole by a giant monster, all while having to deal with some of the especially messed up hidden things in this town. And people get on my case because I don't wrap things up with a pretty bow? F[BLEEP]kers."

Duke takes another drag and flicks the nub out the window, pulling up behind a diner.

DUKE: "I saved just about every child in this f[BLEEP]kin' town, and now I gotta run around, delivering cheap plastic pieces of sh[BLEEP]t that will just be forgotten in a week, or else I'm goin' to jail..."

Duke looks off down an alley.

DUKE: "F[BLEEP]k it."

He gets out of the truck with the camera quickly following. He walks to the bed and reaches in, pulling out the sacks of toys. He walks over to a dumpster behind the diner and opens it up, tossing both bags in.

DUKE: "Then they can take my ass to f[BLEEP]kin' jail!"

Walking down the alley, Duke takes a long drag from his joint, flicking it away. He pulls out another and sticks it in between his lips. Pulling out his silver lighter, he flicks it open and starts trying to light it. It clicks and sparks a few times.

DUKE: "C'mon ya f[BLEEP]kin' thing!"

Duke clocks it a few more times, and then a bright green ball of fire sparks to life on it, the size of a basketball.

DUKE: "HOLY SH[BLEEP]T!!!"

Duke flings the lighter and the ball of fire away into a trash can. From inside, a bright green light shines out, growing brighter and brighter.

DISEMBODIED VOICE: "Duuuuuuuuuke..."

DUKE: "Well, what's this f[BLEEP]kin' bullsh[BLEEP]t I gotta put up with now?"

Duke's voice is now much deeper, the camera panning away from the trash can to film him. He has his black skull mask on his face and is pulling back the hammer on his pistol, pointing it at the source of the light. Just then, an ethereal green, emaciated hand, with fingers like claws, reaches out from inside the trash receptacle. It is soon followed by another. Then out floats a nude, almost skeletal humanoid figure. His skin stretching taught over his ribs, his limbs little more than sticks, his face almost a skull, with glowing green eyes looking out from deeply sunken in sockets, wispy hair waving in a wind that is not there. There is a blur of pixels to censor the being's nudity.

DISEMBODIED VOICE: "Duuuuuuuuuuke!"

The being pointed a finger, its voice raspy yet deep.

DUKE: "Holy sh[BLEEP]t... is that Kenny Lynx?"

Duke turns to look at the camera, peeling off his mask.

DUKE: "Kenny was kinda my mentor growing up. He was the town 'fixer' and took me under his wing a bit. Helped me refine my skills a bunch when it came to dealing with the strange and dangerous."

Duke turns back to the ghostly entity.

DUKE: "How ya doin', man? I mean, aside from being dead and all and starved-looking, provided that this isn't some kind of illusion."

KENNY: "Duuuuuke... I come bearing a warning..."

DUKE: "If it's about that possessed doll, don't worry. I took it out into the desert, to Site 77, and put a bullet in the back of its plastic skull."

KENNY: "No... but did you remember to leave an offering after you did it?"

DUKE: "Yup. A large cheeseburger and fries for our... 'special friend' out there, and he took care of the rest no problem, just like you taught me."

KENNY: "Good... but I have come to warn you..."

DUKE: "If it's about Sally, I took care of the situation too. Saw a doctor and got it taken care of."

KENNY: "Y'know, if you'd just let me finish what I'm tryin' to say, you'd know what I was talkin' about. You always had to run your mouth when we were out on a job, just couldn't ever sit there and shut up!"

DUKE: "Hey, f[BLEEP]k you, Kenny! At least I'm not so much of a pervert that I end up dying bare ass naked and have to come back from the dead to traumatize folks in more ways than one!"

KENNY: "WHAT I F[BLEEP]KIN' DO IN MY SPARE TIME IS NO ONE'S BUSINESS BUT MY OWN, AND CERTAIN ENTITIES BEYOND HUMAN UNDERSTANDING!"

The ghostly form put up its hands.

KENNY: "Look, ya loudmouth assh[BLEEP], I had this whole speech about chains and how you are doomed if you don't change your ways, and how three ancient spirits shall visit you shortly, but now I'm almost out of time because you had to act like such a f[BLEEP]kin' jackass. So, bullet points are, you messed up big time, spirits are coming to show you the error of your ways, change so you don't end up like me. Got it?"

DUKE: "Got it. Make sure when I die, I'm either fully dressed or have been working out at least."

Kenny's hand became pixelated before he disappeared in a sudden bright green flash of light.

DUKE: "Kenny always had had a flair for the dramatic. Don't get me wrong, he was a great fixer. Well, when he wasn't sleeping around with just about anything with a pulse. He actually got hit by a couple paternity suits from some succubis on two occasions."

Duke takes a drag from his joint, looking up at the sky, the dark blue slowly becoming deeper as night creeps closer.

DUKE: "So I'm gunna be visited by three ancient spirits... oh gee, I wonder why."

Duke puts his hands on his hips and sighs.

DUKE: "Christmas f[BLEEP]kin' sucks."

YOUNG MAN'S VOICE: "You didn't always used to think so, Duke."

Duke turns around, seeing a blob of white fog. The fog swirls and changes shapes, taking on the shape of a person. It coalesces and solidifies, changing color, until a teenage boy with short red hair wearing a white t-shirt and matching jeans is levitating a foot off the ground, giving off a soft white glow.

DUKE: "Let me guess... Ghost of Christmas Past?"

SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS PAST: "Spirit. Close though, but Spirits were never actually born."

DUKE: "I know the difference between spirits and ghosts. But whatever. So you're allegedly gunna take me to look at maybe one or two instances of my childhood where Christmas meant a lot or something?"

The Spirit chuckles and smiles warmly at Duke.

SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS PAST: "Why do I sense some skepticism in the voice of one who has seen and dealt with so much more than the average mortal?"

Duke strokes his chin as he ponders something.

DUKE: "Okay then, if you're the Spirit of Christmas Past, what was I doing at this exact moment on Christmas exactly eight years ago?"

The semi-transparent boy chuckled and snapped his fingers.

SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS PAST: "You got high and ended up in an hour long screaming verbal altercation with a feral donkey."

The landscape shifts and resolidifies, the camera panning around to show that they are now standing on a rocky hill next to a bubbling creek. Just a few feet away from Duke and the Spirit is another Duke, shirtless, and a gray-furred donkey.

PAST DUKE: "I WAS WALKIN' HERE FIRST, YA JACKASS!!!"

The donkey snorts, its ears laying flat.

PAST DUKE: "For the last time, ya F[BLEEP]K! MOVE!"

The donkey turns and kicks past Duke right in the center of his forehead, laying him out flat. It then walks over to the water and leans its head down to get a drink.

DUKE: "... Lucky guess."

PAST DUKE: "Wha?"

The landscape warps for a moment before reverting back to the alley.

SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS PAST: "Well? Believe me now?"

DUKE: "... Okay smart guy. What was I doing three Christmases ago? Eh?"

The Spirit rolls his eyes.

SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS PAST: "I'll show you if you want, but we are kinda on a time limit. However, to sum it up. You were getting a brutal parking lot beatdown after trying to steal the Burger Castle secret recipe."

DUKE: "Close! But I was the one giving the beatdown."

With another snap of the Spirit's fingers, the area around them shifted until they were standing in a sparse parking lot. Nearby, under the light of a parking lot lamp, past Duke was on the ground while two large men dressed in the black and red Burger Castle uniform shirts were mercilessly kicking him.

DUKE: "And I woulda gotten away with it two, if it wasn't for those meddling employees."

One of the employees snapped his head up, his eyes glowing with a yellow light, before the Spirit caused the parking lot to shift. A few seconds later, and the camera was panning around a small trailer park.

SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS PAST: "Getting us back on track, do you recognize this place, Duke? It's the trailer park you and your mother lived in for most of your childhood. We have returned to the year 1996, when you were just six years old... Duke?"

The spirit turns to where Duke had been standing a second ago, to find him gone. The camera turns quickly to the left, and then to the right, before focusing back on the spirit, who pinches the bridge of his nose.

SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS PAST: "Oh great, we've got us a runner."

The footage changes to Duke's bodycam, jiggling a bit as he runs past trailers, a smattering few were decorated for the season, fewer with lights. The camera jostles a little before it is turned around to reveal Duke looking down into it, having plucked it off his coat to look into it with a grin.

DUKE: "Okay, both times the spirit or whatever showed me things from my past, when I said something, someone from then heard me. What's more, despite the haziness of most of my holidays, I do distinctly remember hearing that voice on both of those occasions. Which means these are not just shadows or echoes of things that have already happened! We have actually traveled through time and this sh[BLEEP]t's happening RIGHT NOW! And if that theory is correct, then I can't pass up this opportunity."

Duke stopped his running, now standing in front of a bright blue trailer with red pepper lights lining its top.

DUKE: "Yup! That little f[BLEEP]ker said that this was 1996, and it's probably a safe assumption to say that this is Christmas too. Which means, my Uncle Roger is still living here. I gotta make this quick. I figure that I don't have a lot of time."

Duke affixes the camera back to his coat and walks up the steps. He knocks on the trailer door and doesn't have to wait long. The door opens to reveal a stick-thin shirtless man in his forties with a blinking red dragon tattoo on his chest.

ROGER: "Yeah?"

DUKE: "Mark sent me. I heard that you've still got a lot of quaaludes for sale?"

Roger took a drag off his cigarette and smiled.

ROGER: "That I do, bud. How much do you want?"

The footage quickly cuts to Duke sitting on a lawn chair in daylight, a joint between his lips.

DUKE: "My uncle Roger used to deal right out of his home, before he got ran out of the trailer park for what he did to the park manager's car, and refused to clean it or pay to have it cleaned. Well, that, and for also selling PCP, even after it went out of style... I assume because of all the self-mutilation and cannibalism and whatnot. Anyways, he was always bragging about saving up a HUGE shipment of quaaludes he got from back in the '80s and held onto when they were banned and discontinued. And I do mean that it was huge. He was still selling bottles-full up until the new millennium!"

Duke gestures to the twenty glass bottles filled with the red pills sitting on the ground next to his chair.

DUKE: "And I always have a lot of fun when I pop a few of them, or I used to until Uncle Roger's supply finally ran out. Well, I got my own supply!"

The footage shifts back to Duke, now stepping down off of Roger's porch, the Spirit jogging up to him and coming to a stop, a bit out of breath.

SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS PAST: "Okay, look, please don't just run off when we're in the past! If you go and assassinate someone to alter the timeline, I'm the one who ends up getting in trouble over it!"

DUKE: "I was just buying 'ludes off my uncle while I had the chance to... do a lot of people you take into the past try to assassinate someone?"

SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS PAST: "... So anyway, let's return to our trip down memory lane!"

DUKE: "Oh alright. I got what I wanted anyways... wait, how is the camera crew here too?"

SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS PAST: "Because I said it's okay. Alrighty then! Not thinking about the ramifications of you doing this and making sure you stay near me so that it'll be easier for you to not be seen or heard, let us get this show back on the road!"

The Spirit snaps his fingers and once more the scenery shifts, until they are standing in front of a trailer. It is white with a small picketed fenced off area with a patch of grass that was bright green and clearly neatly trimmed. A secondary snap, and they are soon inside. The walls are chestnut brown paneling with a tan carpet. They are standing in a living room with a large red sofa and a matching recliner. Behind them near the wall is a fully decorated Christmas tree, with strings of colorful lights, red, green, and silver garland strung about the branches, and ornaments everywhere. Underneath the tree were about ten gifts.

SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS PAST: "Duke, do you remember this home?"

DUKE: "'Course. It's the trailer me and mom lived in until we found out we were Dad's secret second family... Damn, Mom really did try to go all-out for Christmas."

The Spirit nodded sagely.

SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS PAST: "She had to work a lot, but every year, she made sure to get Christmas off to spend it with you. And while she couldn't provide much in the way of gifts, she did try her best to get you things that she thought you would love."

In runs a small boy with shoulder-length brown hair, wearing a set of blue pj's, eyes lighting up with excitement. Walking in behind him is a woman in her thirties with longer brown hair the same color, done into a ponytail. She's wearing a pink bathrobe and smiles brightly at the boy.

YOUNG DUKE: "MAMA! SANTA CAME!!!"

LUCY: "He sure did, Buddy! Let's see what he brought you, okay?"

YOUNG DUKE: "'Kay... ooh! But first!" The little version of Duke dashes off back the way they had come. Running back from the hallway, he proudly presents his mother a blue and gold-wrapped box. "I wasn't sure if Santa still brings presents to grown-ups, so I made you this in class, Mama! Merry Christmas!"

Lucy puts a hand over her heart, wiping away a happy tear with a free hand.

LUCY: "Oh, sweetie! Thank you so much." Lucy unwraps the present and opens the shoebox. From inside she pulls out what appears to be a comically large, somewhat misshapen mug, white with a red handle. "I love it!"

Young Duke looks ecstatic, while the camera pans back over to the present day Duke, who is rubbing his eye.

DUKE: "Good f[BLEEP]kin' job, emotional manipulation at its finest."

The Spirit rolls his ears and throws a companionable arm over Duke's shoulder.

SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS PAST: "Duke, I'm trying to show you how much you used to love Christmas! And show you that your Mom was happy just to make you happy, and that little handmade gift you gave her made her even happier. You guys didn't have much, but you had each other, and sometimes your father too!"

DUKE: "When he wasn't spending the holiday in jail because he convinced some followers to try and rob a bank with him, all while they were dressed as nuns... He'd just re-watched Sister-Act..."

SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS PAST: "Things wouldn't stay happy and bright for you, though, would they?"

The Spirit had a sad smile on its face while Duke nodded.

DUKE: "No sh[BLEEP]t. After Dad got himself three years in prison for combination tax evasion and trying to steal the governor's identity in order to try to legalize gambling in public, Mom went missing for two years, and so I ended up going into foster care."

A snap of the Spirit's fingers and the scene shifted to the inside of a very run-down house. Part of the railing to a set of stairs was missing, having been broken off at some point. Wallpaper was peeling in places, and a rat scurried by.

DUKE: "Oh yeah... the Jeffrey's... I remember these f[BLEEP]ks."

Just then, a teenage boy was stomping down the stairs, his right eyes blackened and swollen. He was wearing just a red t-shirt and jeans, and had a backpack slung over his shoulder. At the top of the stairs was a woman with her blonde hair in a tight bun, wearing a faded maroon tracksuit, quickly following behind him.

DUKE: "Elanore Jeffreys."

Duke's voice is a low and harsh growl.

ELANORE: "And just where do you think you're gunna go, huh? The deputies will just bring you right back here anyway?"

Her scratchy voice agitated the teenaged Duke.

TEENAGE DUKE: "F[BLEEP]K OFF! I don't care how many f[BLEEP]kin' times they drag me back here, I'll just keep leaving!"

ELANORE: "WELL GO ON THEN! GO GET FELT UP BY SOME PERVERT IN THE WOODS!"

The younger Duke ripped open the front door and stomped out.

DUKE: "The house caught fire that very same night, and the b[BLEEP]tch actually tried to say I did it. But I was down by the creek at the time. That's where I set up my own little camp and got to meet a talking catfish. But yeah, is there a point in showing me this bullsh[BLEEP]t?"

ELANORE: "Who said that?"

The Spirit snapped its fingers and brought Duke back to the alley in the present. It smiled at Duke before puffing back out into fog and drifting away.

DUKE: "... Waste of my goddamn time."

Duke walks around to the front of the diner and enters. The camera quickly follows behind but stops when Duke does. The inside of the diner is exponentially much larger than the outside, filled with endless booths laden down with food and drinks, sweets, and even towering stacks of presents. The windows all had wreaths and garlands stuck to them. The camera turns in a full circle to take it all in.

DUKE: "I thought I could at least get a f[BLEEP]kin' sandwich first."

The camera comes to a stop, backing up a bit to take in a large man with a long auburn beard to match his hair, wearing a red and green cloak standing right behind Duke.

SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS PRESENT: "Look upon me and know me, my friend!"

Duke whirls around, yells, and whips out a canister of some sorts. He holds it up and pulls a trigger on it, spraying the giant man right in his face. Instantaneously, the figure doubles over, before falling over onto the floor, coughing and screaming in pain.

SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS PRESENT: "GAH! WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?!"

DUKE: "Bear mace."

SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS PRESENT: "WHY?!"

DUKE: "For a second there, I thought you were a bear."

Coughing, the Spirit pulls out a handkerchief from within his cloak.

DUKE: "Yeah, you're gunna wanna flush out your eyes with water."

The Spirit shakily rises and stumbles over to a table with drinks covering its surface. Grabbing a glass of water, he dumps it in his eyes and starts rubbing. The camera fades out.

[Roll Credits]

 

 

YAY! I doubt I'll have part 2 finished in time for Christmas, but oh well! Stay tuned for the exciting conclusion!