Eloise’s heart was beating a million times a minute. Levi called her cute. Her! The worthless broken Eloise that couldn’t do anything right. The weird freak that no one could stand to look at. Levi called her cute. He meant it too. His eyes didn’t dart to the side like the counselor’s would when she said things. Levi wasn’t a liar. Levi called her cute and he wasn’t a liar.

She had been so afraid this morning. What was a girl supposed to do for her new boyfriend in the mornings? Cook them breakfast of course! But there was a problem. There wasn’t anything good to cook for him. How could she make a good impression for her new boyfriend if the breakfast she cooked wasn’t good?

Last night he had stayed by her side for the entire night. That’s how much he cared about her. He was such a good boyfriend, so she had to be just as good to him. If she wasn’t as good to him as he was to her, he might leave her. She would die if Levi left her. She would die.

It was okay though, she just needed to borrow some ingredients from the neighbors. She could have knocked on the door, but what if she accidentally woke Levi while it was still so early? He had stayed up by the bedside all night. Was she supposed to ruin his sleep after he had exhausted himself for her? That wasn’t something that a good girlfriend would do.

So she didn’t ask the neighbors and she just took a few things. Eloise knew that you weren’t supposed to do that normally, but these weren’t normal circumstances. And besides, all she took were a few ingredients to make breakfast. No reasonable person would object to that if it was for Levi. It shouldn’t have been a big deal at all.

But that woman! Levi’s neighbor wasn’t reasonable at all! Why was she so mad over just a few borrowed things? Why did she have to interrupt them at the worst possible moment? Levi was holding her in his lap and she RUINED IT. And the worst part was that she blamed Levi for what Eloise had done too. What if that made him mad at her? What if Levi got mad at her and then left her. She would die if Levi left her.

But Levi didn’t get mad at her. Levi’s terrible neighbor tried to tell him bad things about her and remind him that she wasn’t as pretty as his ex. But he didn’t listen to the bad things she said. Levi didn’t listen to her and instead he called her cute. Levi called her cute. And he meant it too. And he wasn’t a liar. He was such a good boyfriend. He’s perfect.

He ate every bite of the breakfast she made for him and now they were heading outside. Would he walk her to class? Maybe he would hold her hand. She hated her boarding school. No one there wanted to be seen standing next to her, but Levi wasn’t like that. He would definitely hold her hand and walk her to class. 

She hated staying in the dorms, but she didn’t have to anymore. She could stay with her boyfriend every night now. She hated going to class too, but she knew that she needed to go. Levi would think she was stupid if she didn’t graduate. He was smart. He wouldn’t want a stupid girlfriend. If Levi thought she was stupid, he might decide to leave her. She would die if Levi left her. She would die.

“Well, I guess this is it.” Levi turned to her and smiled that gentle smile of his. “You’ve got to get to class, and I have a few things to take care of today too.”

The two of them had reached the outside of his apartment building. But for some reason, Levi wasn’t holding her hand and he wasn’t going to walk her to class. 

“You’ll be okay on your own from here, right?”

Eloise didn’t understand what was happening. Why did he seem like he was going to leave already? She was confused, so all she could do to answer him was nod her head. 

“Great, then take care of yourself, okay?”

After he said that final thing, Levi turned and left down the opposite street instead of walking her to class. He turned and he left. Without her.

Eloise didn’t understand. Was he mad at her for this morning? But why?! What did she do wrong? 

She knew that he couldn’t stay beside her all the time, even if she really, really wanted him to. It was hard, but Eloise understood that. She wasn’t one of those clingy girls who would smother their boyfriend. All she wanted was to walk with him and hold his hand. Why couldn’t she have that? Why not? What did she do wrong?!

Wait... Of course. That must be it. Eloise could be so silly and stupid sometimes. She had done something wrong. Or rather it was something that she hadn’t done. Levi had told her to do something, but she hadn’t done it yet. Of course he wouldn’t indulge her when he had asked her for something and she failed to do it. He had just told her a couple minutes ago that he was unhappy with his neighbor. What kind of silly and stupid girlfriend couldn’t take such an obvious hint? He had given her such an obvious test to see if she was listening to him and she almost missed it.

He had said the world would be better off without them. Levi wasn’t a liar. If he said it, then it had to be true.

***

Levi sat down in a cozy little corner of the coffee shop. This was his usual spot whenever he would come here. He did most of his writing at home, but every now and then, going out in public would help him stay more productive. Or at least it felt that way. 

Plus, this coffee shop was a frequent hangout spot for several authors under his publisher. If he loitered around long enough, he’d often get the chance to talk shop with some other writers and get someone to beta read his work. That was his main intention today.

Levi had a good feeling about his most recent couple chapters. Especially the new character that was inspired by Eloise. But even still, he wanted to get a second opinion. A character like this was outside his comfort zone and he couldn’t be sure how readers would feel about them.

He spent the next three hours working diligently at his laptop. This was the most productive that Levi had been in recent memory. The further along he got, the more sure he started to feel. Perhaps there was no reason to second guess himself and he should just keep doing what felt natural. 

The café’s bell jingled a pleasant chime as a good-looking man with a defined jaw and neat stubble walked in. He wore a pressed jacket over a sweater-vest, looking the part of the ‘young and cool’ professor at your local university. Levi recognized him. 

He was Daniel, one of the most successful up-and-coming authors in the city. He and Levi had an amicable relationship, having met and spoken a handful of times at various events. They weren’t in the same genre, as Daniel wrote mostly detective thrillers, but he knew the craft so he could probably offer some good advice. His novels were all a lot more successful than Levi’s, afterall. 

As Levi took notice of him, he also took notice of Levi. He gave a warm smile and lifted his hand in greeting from across the shop. After he ordered his coffee, he made his way over and plopped down in the seat beside Levi.

“Well well, look who dragged himself out of his cave for once!”

“Ah yeah. Hey Daniel, good to see you.” Levi smiled wryly. Daniel’s enthusiasm was a bit too high-energy for an introvert like him.

“How you been, my guy? You cookin’ up anything good lately? You know, not to brag but my latest book launched last week and it’s already looking like another best-seller. You better keep at it and not fall too far behind.”

“Yeah, I’ve got something in the works. It’s still early, but I’ve got a good feeling about it.”

“Really now? You don’t mind giving your ol’ buddy Daniel a sneak peak, do ya?” 

“Sure, that would be great actually. I was just working on it here.”

Levi turned his laptop around so that the other man could read through his last chapter. As Daniel settled in for the next couple of minutes, he couldn’t help but fidget a bit in his seat. It was always nerve-racking having someone else read your work for the first time. 

At first Daniel kept his big smile, but as he continued on reading, his expression gradually turned more serious and then eventually skeptical. Finally, he sat back in his chair and covered his mouth as he coughed awkwardly.

“Uh, Levi, I don’t know what to say, but don’t you think this character is a little too strange for a romance novel?”

“Strange? What do you mean?” Levi felt his heart sink. This certainly didn’t seem like it was going to be a good review.

“I mean you wrote them so creepy. Serious serial-killer vibes. And trust me I know, that’s kind of my specialty. I thought you were all about the rom-coms, why are you suddenly stepping into new ground?”

“Did I really write them that way?” Levi was confused by this appraisal. He had based the character after Eloise. Sure, she was a little unusual, but definitely no serial-killer. “I don’t know. I think a romance with this kind of character could be really interesting.”

Daniel just shook his head, treating Levi like a son he was disappointed with.

“Do you know what the most important thing is when coming up with a new novel?” He paused for emphasis, then tapped a finger on the table. “Marketability! You have to serve your audience. Romance readers want fluffy feel-good moments and loveable goofball leads.” 

“Is that really the most important thing?”

“Of course! There’s no point in writing something that’s too niche like this. Do you really think that there are readers out there that want a romance with an obsessive stalker girl? Even if there are, they’re probably shut-ins so starved for affection that they’ll read any garbage that scratches their weird fetish. Levi seriously, if you wrote a story like this, all your readers would be a bunch of sick fucks.”

“Well, when you put it that way it does sound bad…” Levi hesitated. Even though he knew that a story like his would never be mainstream, he wanted to have at least some audience. Was it really as bad as Daniel was making it seem?

“Levi, anytime I write something I ask myself this: Is my book something that could be made into a TV drama or movie adaptation? If the answer is no, then scrap it. It means the idea does not have enough mass-appeal.”

“Well.. thanks for being honest at least. I guess I need to rethink where to take my story.”

“Hah, no worries! Brutal honesty is what I’m here for. The mark of a good author is one that can take criticism well, so keep at it and you’ll get there. Oh, and another piece of advice. Write what you know. Leave the thriller stuff to people like me. You know, I watched the police tape off a real crime scene before and I have a relative that’s a detective. There are just some things that you can’t understand until you’ve seen it for yourself.” 

Daniel slapped Levi on the back and let out a burst of boisterous laughter, drawing a few eyes from around the café. He left just as cheerful as he arrived, but Levi was in a gloomy mood after their conversation. He didn’t feel like writing now, so he just closed the laptop with a sigh.

If he wasn’t going to get anything more done here, then he might as well head back to his apartment.