--1--
Pastor Richmond dismissed the congregation, exited the chancel, and walked down the sanctuary aisle to take his place by the door. The people waited until he passed then rose from their pews to gather in small groups to catch up on weekly events and discuss the sermon. As usual, Michelle’s features were flawless as she stood beside Brian and welcomed the ego-feeding comments about how radiant she looked and how her pregnancy made her glow from her catty circle of friends.
Brian imagined her as a pampered, fat cat surrounded by an entourage of starving strays waiting to fight over the remains in her bowl while she licked the cream from her paws. He listened to her tell the story again of how Amanda didn’t have the decency to come to the gathering to celebrate her pregnancy or the Halloween party. Brian smirked and wondered why Daniel’s absence wasn’t noted, then realized he was glad she didn’t mention it. As much as he hoped his friend would be there, he was relieved he had stayed home. If anything, he still owed Daniel an apology for the night he passed out in Desmond’s Tavern and for not thanking him for taking him home.
“Do you ever notice her shoes,” Michelle said, moving on to another favorite Amanda-bashing topic: her wardrobe. He felt like a prop as her voice droned on and how if it weren’t for him and Daniel, she wouldn’t be able to suffer through a night in her presence. “No fashion sense and she knows nothing about movies or magazines. I –“
“If I may, Michelle,” Pastor Richmond interrupted. A silence fell over the group. No one had heard his approach. All of a sudden Brian smiled. Things were starting to look interesting as David continued. “As you know, I’ve been working with Dr. Blake and think the last thing she should be associated with is anything with a clueless connotation. If you like, I will be more than happy to meet with you so you can discuss your feelings and perhaps shed some light on her personality so you can get a better understanding. Otherwise, I ask you to refrain from this type of gossip in the sanctuary. Good day.”
Brian tried to hold in his laughter and failed. It felt good to see his wife being told off although her scathing look told him otherwise. He knew he would be in for it later, but for the moment, he couldn’t care less. It seemed to take every ounce of strength to refrain from telling her she deserved it and make the situation worse. Instead, he excused himself and went to wait for her in the car.
--2--
Amanda sat behind her desk pouring over her notes. “So much to do,” she mumbled before picking up the phone and calling Pastor Richmond. She was hoping to meet with him and a travel agent on the same day. Now that she had a plan for the patients, time was moving along faster than she had anticipated. Pamela had almost finished reading The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe, so she wanted to stop by the library and pick up another book when she left that evening. Pastor Richmond liked the idea of the art projects and set up a box in the sanctuary where the congregation could donate supplies.
Brian continued to meet occasionally with the pastor to get updates on the soup kitchen’s progress and if there was anything they needed. Whenever Richmond brought up Sanford or made a suggestion for him to talk to Amanda because the garden was being cultivated at her facility, he would skirt the idea or offer some glib excuse and leave. Each time David would frown. He wanted Amanda there when Brian came into the office, but his drop-ins were sporadic and left him feeling flustered. It was easy to see the lawyer didn’t want to be there, yet Mayor Bradford insisted so he could be kept updated on the soup kitchen’s progress. “Excuse me a moment,” he said when the phone rang. “Hello? Ah, Amanda. We were just talking about you.”
Brian’s frame slouched when he heard the name. He straightened his tie and looked at the clock on the wall. “Do you want me to leave,” he asked.
David smiled warmly and shook his head. “I think that would be great. Brian is here. I’ll ask him to join us.”
The silence seemed to stretch, making Brian wonder if Amanda was still on the other line. He didn’t want to face her and tell her the only reason Mayor Bradford was doing this was to appeal to his voters and take credit for backing the project. Reasons as to why he couldn’t meet with them together raced through his mind. “I need to be going. There’s a case – “
“This will only take a minute,” David interrupted. He pulled out his datebook and wrote down a time. Then he wrote it on a Post-it note and gave the slip to Brian. “This is when Amanda will be here. I hope you will consider meeting with us.” Brian smiled and shook the pastor’s hand. After thanking him for his time, he said he would consider it. David showed him to the door and closed it softly behind him.
Brian’s plastered smile cracked as he burst out onto the sidewalk. The crisp air was sharp and burned the back of his throat. He picked up his pace as he headed to his car which was parked a block and a half away. Normally he hated parallel parking by the church because he could never find a close spot, but this time he welcomed the breather. He got behind the wheel and put the key in the ignition. The Porche purred softly as he read the short note. After checking his mirrors, he pulled out onto the road. When he had two blocks behind him, he crumpled the small piece of paper and opened his window just long enough to toss it out.
--3--
Pastor Richmond rubbed his hands together to warm them as he and Amanda walked around the perimeter of the land behind her office. Samantha had been asked to join and was given a rake to gather any debris and try to churn any loose soil. David picked up a small dirt clog and rolled it between his thumb and forefinger. “In Papua New Guinea, the soil is more volcanic, so the most lucrative crop the Ytuwa settled on was sweet potatoes.”
“What does Papua New Guinea have to do with Sanford?”
“Nothing,” David admitted. “I’m just reminiscing. My daughter, Katie, is there. She’ll be back in February.”
“Oh,” Amanda said. “What did you do when you were there?”
“Farmed and hung out with the men when they were present. I was useless for hunting expeditions, so I learned how to forage.”
Amanda grew intrigued. “I looked up swidden. It means what you said. When were you there?”
David paused. He thought about the monumental amounts of rain in the highlands when he was there and wondered how Katie’s humanitarian project was going. He didn’t have the heart to tell her that she would be doing a lot of gathering and tending to gardens. “It was a spur-of-the-moment mission trip of sorts in 1959. An Evangelist from another church was visiting and was quite excited about what he had learned of the Ytuwa tribe.”
“I’ve never heard of them. Tell me more.”
The memories had begun haunting him to the point of nightmares. The carefully constructed grave he had buried them in had permeated the earth and was sprouting in ways he hadn’t anticipated. More and more he could hear the flutes and crackle of the flames while the dull thud of stomping feet landed on packed soil. He licked his lips and hoped he could keep his voice from cracking. “The Evangelist was on a mission to save them. He called them heathens and I agreed because of what he told me. I was ignorant.’
Amanda’s voice was clipped. “You’re speaking in riddles, Pastor Richmond. Is there a point?”
The pastor started. How he confused her with being approachable baffled him. The woman was menacing in her steel gray slacks and neutral shoes that showed they were there for the sole purpose of moving between points A and B. He opted to be honest. “Amanda,” he admitted, “you frighten me.”
To his surprise, Dr. Blake blanched. “I apologize. Please continue. How do you believe you were ignorant?”
As if a switch had been flipped, he relaxed. It made him wonder how long it took Daniel to find out if he was direct, she lost her intimidating stance. He watched Samantha, who seemed to be playing more than raking, for a moment before forming his words. “The Ytuwa were considered heathens because they ate their dead. I was ignorant because I agreed when I first heard about it. I was ignorant because I didn’t understand why.”
Samantha’s laughter filled the stark air, agitating a small flock of crows. She dropped the rake in favor of the cacophony, reminding Dr. Blake of the recent walk she and Daniel had taken. “Why were you ignorant?”
“Because I took it at surface value. When I was there, I learned the humanity behind the abominable practice. It is traditional for them. They celebrate the life of the deceased and consume the body so it won’t rot away in a hole and be ravished by pestilence or vermin, and to release its spirit from any demonic force.”
Amanda was fascinated. It was almost too absurd for her rational mind to grasp, yet poetically romantic in its morbidity. She made a mental note to see if she could find more information on mortuary cannibalism. Understanding dropped into place. “So you felt it necessary to share the gospel and convert the lot of them to Christians so they wouldn’t go to hell.”
David nodded, feeling the weight of his mounting shame. “I’ve done a lot of begging for forgiveness. I had no right to judge.”
Amanda’s brow furrowed as she studied him. “But you believe in sin and enforce the commandments. Why wouldn’t you speak out against what you consider the evil of their practice?”
“Because it’s not my place, Amanda,” he sighed. “Only God can make the choice. We are told not to judge, lest we be judged according to the way we judge others. I do not want to be looked at through the eyes of condemnation. Grace is to be cherished. Not abused.”
Amanda pondered his reasoning. If there was any truth to it. In his light of understanding, Pastor Richmond believed in a compassionate entity that preferred love and mercy as opposed to the strike of lightning bolts and enforcing eternal damnation. It made her wonder if his sermons carried a harmonizing melody of peace. She had looked up the verse he had mentioned to Daniel in the Bible on his bookshelf, wrote it down on a scrap of paper, and turned it into a bookmark. “Peace I leave with you,” she thought aloud.
David nodded. “Not as the world gives. Nor in the light of man’s understanding.”
“On what basis have you reached this conclusion?”
The pastor chuckled, though his eyes remained haunted. “Another time, Amanda. Perhaps over dinner with Daniel as well.”
Amanda nodded. Daniel wasn’t religious, yet every so often she caught him in acts which betrayed he had some sort of faith. She had a momentary pang of awareness and made a mental note to ask him about it. “I’m sure Daniel would enjoy the discussion. Are you doing anything for Thanksgiving?”
David thought about the frozen turkey dinner and bottle of egg nog he bought the other day. “With Katie not being here, no.”
“Why don’t you join us?”
David looked at the medical director skeptically. He could not imagine her cooking anything if not on the other side of bland. “Well –
“I have been feeding Daniel for twelve years now and he’s still alive,” she stated bluntly.
The pastor’s laugh rang out, tinged with the haunting melodic echo of church bells. “You win. I’ll bring a bottle of egg nog and a good dinner wine.”
Dr. Blake nodded then looked at her charge. “Come, Sam. It’s time to go in.”
Samantha’s head drooped as she headed towards the sound of Amanda’s voice. She stood before her like a sullen child who had been told recess was over. “Birds.”
“I know, Sam,” Amanda said. “I need to look at your hands. They need to be washed before dinner.”
Samantha held out her hands, palms up and fingers splayed so Amanda could check for blisters. Her skin was warm from the activity and her cheeks held a healthy blush. Her hair was filling in the bald patches and stuck out in little tufts. It made the pastor want to reach out and embrace her, yet he refrained. To distract himself, he scanned the yard and wondered about the possibility of getting a birdbath to complement the garden.
He followed Amanda and her patient around to the front of the building. Dr. Blake began discussing the types of crops which could be grown indoors as a way to experiment with the patients' responses. “It’ll let me know a little more about what I can expect when we plant in the spring. I’ve scheduled a meeting with Dr. Williams and staff to ask for the names of those who would work best as well as benefit from the project. I want to use the dirt from the firebreak and just get planters.”
“Do you believe they will ever become fit to reenter society?”
Amanda looked at Samantha and suddenly felt tired. Her answer was flat. “No.”
“Medicine is changing all the time, Amanda. Who’s to say what it will be like in a year or two?
Amanda nodded even though the pastor’s comment did little to assuage her doubts. It was not that she disagreed with him. She just didn’t believe in the miracle. It was like convincing a cynical child there was a tooth fairy. “Maybe.”
Pastor Richmond took note of the discouragement in her voice. They walked the rest of the way in silence. At the entrance David let Amanda know he had asked Brian to join them for their next meeting. Samantha grew impatient as they exchanged a few more words before David turned and walked towards the parking lot. Amanda held the door for her patient and followed her inside.
