I was nervous as fuck in English. Sitting and waiting ten minutes for the bell to ring was miserable, especially when the guy you made a move on and then ghosted you sits next to you in this class. I debated ditching class, but I would get grounded again for doing such a thing. I have never done it before, so why would I do it now? 

My heart dropped as the familiar figure stepped through the door. Parker. He was wearing the same jeans, shirt, and leather jacket; the same leather jacket I wore as we walked to my home. It was warm and comforting, and the fact it smelled like cigarettes and his deodorant was just perfect. Now, thinking of that, made me sad and I began doodling on my notebook. 

Class began and the teacher continued giving us tips and tricks for our college application letters. She showed us examples of common mistakes made and how to correct them. After getting some example essays to correct them, we were left to work with one another on fixing them before class ended. The teacher walked down the rows and handed out sets of essays to groups of people. Parker and I were handed a set and told to work on it together. My hands become sweaty and I turn to face him.  

“Guess we’re working together,” I say as casually as I could. I hurt deep inside and felt the rejection rise up. Parker pulled his desk over next to mine and we both scanned over the essay. 

“Looks like it,” he muttered back. I couldn’t tell if he was upset or not. I knew I was upset, but I didn’t know how to express it, or if I could express it.

“Should be easy,” I simply said and began underlining simple errors like capitalized letters and misplaced commas. It kept me busy, but my thoughts were still eaten away at him ghosting me. “Parker,”

“Yeah?” He asked while copying what I was doing.

“Sorry,” I sighed.

“For what?”

“Everything that happened on homecoming…” I just went for it, not thinking anything through.

“Okay?” He said and lifted an eyebrow. “What are you apologizing for, exactly?”

“I feel bad for what happened after you took me home.”

“Can’t apologize for your mom being rude like that, despite how rude it was that she talked past me.”

“Yeah… I’m sorry.” I said and scratched the back of my head. “I noticed you were gone yesterday and thought you were avoiding me because -”

“Because you kissed me and then I had to leave?” Parker finished my statement. I was shocked at how blunt he was.

“Yeah… I mean, we didn’t get to finish the moment…”

“Well, as much as I enjoyed the kiss, I couldn’t just stay and finish the moment. Your mom showed up and she was fucking pissed as hell, so yeah, I had to leave.”

I felt the breath in my lungs leave like a vacuum sucked it out. He said he liked the kiss? It wasn’t embarrassing or a mistake? I smiled and Parker lifted an eyebrow.

“You really took my disappearance that personally?”

“Well yeah, you didn’t say anything to me at all over the weekend or on Monday.”

“Like I mentioned before, I got some personal shit to deal with,” he gritted his teeth. 

I felt bad. Maybe if I knew what was happening, I could help somehow?

“What is happening, if you don’t mind me asking?”

“I don’t really want to talk about it,” he answered fast and coldly. I retracted and looked back down at the essay. “Sorry, it’s nothing against you, it’s just I don’t want to deal with it.”

“I’m sorry,” I repeated the only thing I knew to say. “So, you enjoyed the kiss?” I changed subjects and couldn’t help but blush.

“Yeah, it was a good kiss. I’ve had worse.”

“Oh,” I mumbled as I didn’t know what that was supposed to mean. “Well, that’s good.”

“Yeah,” he hummed and slid his paper over to me. “Would you consider this a run-on sentence?” He underlined a really, really long sentence. I read and felt that he was correct. 

“Yeah, I would say so.”

“Sweet,” he made corrections for it and so did I.

The rest of English was boring, honestly. Parker didn’t mention anything about homecoming or whatever he was dealing with. It truly dropped dead; but all I cared about was the fact that he enjoyed my kiss. What does it lead to though? What are we?

I was surprised to walk outside during lunch with Parker. He stopped when he noticed my usual lunch table empty.

“Where are your friends?” 

“Claire hasn’t spoken to me since ruining the dance with my dress, and Justin is grounded for being gay.”

“What the -“

“Don’t get me started on it,” I sighed and stood still in the doorway. 

“Do you want to hang out then?” 

“Yes please,” I agreed and walked with Parker to the edge of the school grounds. He began to smoke. 

I stood close to Parker, becoming nose blind to the smell of smoke. My arm brushed against his and my stomach filled with butterflies. Temptation crept onto me to grab his hand, but he moved away as he turned to face me. 

“So, how much trouble did you get into after I left?” 

“I got grounded over the weekend. I had chores to do and my phone and electronics taken away…” I answered and shrugged my shoulders. “Basically, the usual.” 

“Damn,” he sighed and exhaled smoke.

“Oh well,” I shrugged. “It wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be, though.”

“That’s good,” he spat on the sidewalk, which made me cringe slightly. I watched Parker flick his cigarette out. The lit ashes fell to the ground and he slipped his half smoked stick back into his packet. 

“Why do you only smoke half?”

“Because my friend can only buy me a pack per week. I have to save them, otherwise I’ll be out during the week.” 

“Right, you’re not eighteen yet.” 

“No, but I can’t wait to be. I’ll be free to buy my own cigarettes and live my own life.”

“You don’t live your own life as of now?”

“Not really,” he said and shook the small box of smokes. He smirked and I blushed. “There’s other things to it as well.”

“Yeah…” I sighed. “I’m scared.” 

“Why?”

“Because going to college and being on my own. It’s something new and scary.”

“You don’t have to go to college, you know.”

“Yeah but like the school pushes you to and my parents want me to as well. It’s just so much…”

“Kim, life should be what you want, not what others want…” 

I turned and looked at Parker in his eyes. Those warm, brown eyes.

“I want that kiss again,” I said and felt adrenaline course through my heart and veins. Parker chuckled suddenly and he rubbed his chin. 

“Well, that’s very bold of you to say,” he said and turned to face me. 

“You told me to voice what I wanted, and honestly, that’s what I want. Everything went wrong on homecoming, why not make things finish off right?” 

“You right,” he shrugged and leaned down. He gently grabbed my right chin and pressed his smokey lips into mine. 

My chest flushed with warm butterflies, and they even lowered down more than I expected. Parker was actually kissing me, and more than he was the night I made a move. He pulled off and I stood there dazed with happiness and arousal. I opened my eyes and saw him smiling lightly. 

“Better?” He asked calmly.

“Yes,” I exhaled deeply.