9 – The Soul of a Void
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Some ten hours had passed since these two unfortunate events. We were finally able to take a much-needed breather. Especially me, for I was not only mentally exhausted but also physically.

 

My efforts to escape new problems were now causing me to cough up blood and feel constantly suffocated and uncomfortable, and my legs were trembling and threatening to give way under their own weight. To say I wasn't at my best was an understatement.

 

And that's without mentioning my mental muddle, making it difficult to form coherent reasoning and thoughts. I could only stare distractedly at the landscape, a light breeze running across my cheek. At last, I could relax in front of this magnificent landscape... or I would have liked to.

 

What can I say except that the landscape was still greyish? Honestly, these gray hues depressed me and drove me crazy at the same time. I now knew that gray was my most hated color.

 

Granted, I wasn't being entirely honest about how I felt. I'd left out the relief that ran through my mind as I took in the surroundings. Indeed, the landscape had changed again, and I was pleased to see it. At least the landscape was new, if not cheerful or even restful.

 

Just by looking at the ground, I was already wondering whether I shouldn't turn back. A metallic floor strewn with shimmering geometric shapes and crevices from which a disturbing light emerged. Just approaching the grooves caused me inconceivable physical pain, even if I felt no actual physical damage.

 

And just looking at that unhealthy light sent me into a limbo of despair, and I needed Systalia's help to regain my senses. But even if I looked away from the light and away from the grooves, I couldn't escape the effects of this environment.

 

Indeed, just breathing the air, laden with the scent of fresh, slightly mentholated grass, which seemed restful and made you want to keep on living it, was causing me unbearable nausea and even hallucinations. This time, I had managed to extricate myself from the influence of these hallucinations.

 

Even so, I could only bear the pain, as this place seemed to stretch on forever. Or it could be the surrounding fog, whose droplets would stick to the skin if you stood still, causing intense itching and burning.

 

If you wait longer, your skin will peel, and necrotic spells will appear. I never stayed still long enough to know the next stage. Even though I was curious about it, the effects persuaded me never to experience what came next, even if part of my mind wanted to continue breathing that air.

 

Nor did the many bodies beside me, which seemed half-alive despite their advanced state of deterioration and agonized with uncomfortable, appalling screams. These cries resembled a funeral march song of ultimate desolation and bore witness to solitude in eternal, chilling suffering. At least, that's how I received the song of the cries.

 

And how could I fail to mention the vegetation that seemed to be rooted underneath in the cold, hard soil, which nonetheless caused burning sensations on the feet, even though the latter always remained free of wounds? Vegetation comprises trees and flowers in many twisted shapes and hypnotic patterns.

 

Seeing these plants made me feel like I was losing my balance, no longer knowing where I stood and whether my sister was near or far from me. This frightening situation was dragging on so long that my only chance of getting out of it was to dig my fingernails into the rest of my body.

 

Even though thin streams of fresh blood were running down my body, I was awake from this hypnosis, at least for a while. It wouldn't take more than a few minutes for these plants to regain control over my mind. In any case, I wasn't the only one instilling pain in myself to come out of hypnosis, as my comrade's bloodied body could testify.

 

Unfortunately, we could hardly continue our previous conversation because of this environment. This environment already demands all our energy, both physical and mental.

 

Indeed, my physical exhaustion was becoming so pronounced that I had no choice but to lean on Systalia to walk before having to be carried with difficulty by her. If I wasn't sure before, there was no doubt that I was physically weaker than before.

 

In any case, she seemed to be in so much pain from carrying me that she appeared on the verge of fainting. To this could be added her increasingly erratic and staggering walk. And so our end would come, to the general indifference of both people and the environment.

 

Or so I was convinced, as Systalia finally collapsed to the ground, dragging me down with her. From every part of my body pressed to the ground, an intense pain emanated, a perpetual and continuous burning.

 

But even this pain could hardly make me scream; such was the exhaustion of this body. No, it wasn't just my body; my determination was also suffering, dissolving in my spirit's fatigue and suffering.

 

I felt the end coming, an ironic smile on my face as if to testify to a meaningless and worthless life. And I turned my head one last time toward Systalia, who was looking at me with the same expression. And that was the final image I saw before closing my eyes and finding eternal rest...

 

And before waking up in an etheric space plagued by torment. My soul could only slowly collapse as more and more energy escaped, draining it of information. Fortunately, with great difficulty, I put my essence into the Void before irreversible damage could reach it.

 

But as always, the Void rejected my essence. At least I could boast of having repeated this feat, something impossible until now. Was it due to the release of my Will during the fight before? I thought I'd never know the answer, and it didn't really matter as long as I could save my essence somewhere.

 

Of course, I could have severed the link between my Void and my soul, allowing the latter to stay alive. However, I didn't want to spend my eternity crying out in despair and loneliness like those many half-living people. If this was the future that awaited me, I'd instead abandon this soul to its fate and die if there were no other alternatives.

 

And above all, the Void was the most essential part of me. Far more critical than this weak, disgusting soul I was relying on. All the more so as my intuition told me that the Void must never be lost sight of and that I had to stand by the Void, whatever the circumstances. Even if it meant my downfall.

 

And I could only agree with this instinct, for the Void comforted me and symbolized protection and the absolute. I wanted to be surrounded by it all the time. And it was to this end that I transferred my essence into the Void, taking advantage of my soul's weakened state, which could no longer compel me to let my essence rest within it.

 

Nevertheless, to achieve my goal, I had to supplant the Will of my Void with my Will, a Will to become one with this Void. I tried to strengthen my Will but was soon faced with a problem. I had to feed my Will and, without the help of the Void, to carry out this task in its place.

 

But this didn't discourage me: the opportunity to get closer to the Void was too good and only strengthened my resolve. All that remained was to stabilize my essence in the Void, even if this act seemed unnatural.

 

So, I searched desperately for something to nourish my Will. The energy of my body, my mind, or my soul, I hesitated between all three without reaching an adequate consensus. And that's when an idea that I thought was brilliant at the time dawned on me: I will use all three.

 

This idea may have sounded crazy since it involved sacrificing one's body and mind. Offering the soul was more reasonable, as I had to move my essence to another medium. The sacrifice was more inconsequential than I perceived it to be.

 

The sacrifice of body and spirit raised more questions. After all, I had to possess a body and mind to incarnate in the spiritual and physical worlds. I had to be able to recreate them from scratch after consuming their energy.

 

My only confidence to carry out this dangerous act came from the Void. I firmly believed that the Void was capable of accomplishing this miracle. In any case, I no longer wanted this body or mind. They seemed to me far too faulty. They had trouble processing the data in my essence.

 

So, since I had no choice but to die, I was willing to try this plan. If I had to die, I might as well die trying to change my own destiny rather than being passive, even if it proved futile. This urge to prove my worth to myself was childish; I regret being so young and foolish.

 

As the instability of my essence neared its peak and my Will was overwhelmed by the Void, I redirected the energy of my body, mind, and soul back to my essence.

 

This was very complicated, as I had to impose my Will on my body, mind, soul, and Void simultaneously. And this division of my Will alone precipitated the collapse of my hold on the Void.

 

Nevertheless, just when all seemed lost, a wave of energy from my body passed through my soul, my Void through the Void's link, and finally into my essence. It immediately swelled the mass of energy in the essence before this information was converted into Will.

 

More energy, more information, more Will. As my Will increased, it pushed back the Void. In the end, the body's energy had been enough. Or so I thought, until...

 

Until the Void suddenly increased its energy, pushing back my Will in an explosion of energy. I had to take more energy, but unfortunately, my body didn't have enough left to supply. So, I began to draw energy from my mind and soul.

 

But as I'd guessed, it wasn't enough, so I was forced to convert my body, mind, and soul. Indeed, until now, I had only taken the usual energy, not the energy of their very carriers. And to achieve such a feat, I could only cross my fingers.

 

I concentrated first on my body, which was, above all, a mass of information. And this data itself was merely energy with a singular disposition, a particular Incarnation in this World, which existed only to be used by me and for me.

 

So I gathered all my Will, overwhelming this body, which, exhausted from having given all its surplus energy, had to use its own energy to fight my Will. Little by little, the Will took this energy, using it as its own, accelerating the process until the body finally disappeared entirely.

 

But I had no time to mourn the end of this body and hope it rested in peace. My essence, with no Will to protect it, was under attack from my Void, and I had to redirect all this new Will into the Void.

 

The Void's Will was instantly repelled before it regained its power. The origin of this power intrigued me, but I could hardly think about it any longer as the Void's Will overwhelmed me.

 

I had to try the same action with my mind and hope it worked. I redirected some of my Will to fight my mind. To my dismay, it defended itself better than the body. Instead of attacking my Will with all its might, the spirit simply attacked the weak points to do maximum damage with minimum energy.

 

I winced inwardly at the pain of having my Will punctured. If the spirit wanted to play this game, I had to turn his technique against him. I could only win since discerning the opponent's weaknesses required high processing speed to make the calculations.

 

Moreover, the winner was a foregone conclusion between a spirit using a decaying soul as support and a Will projected by an essence using the Void, a support of unsuspected calculating power. Even if, to win, I once again had to leave my essence at the mercy of the Void's Will.

 

That's why I had to ensure I got rid of that spirit as quickly as possible. And I was not disappointed: with my entire Will against my spirit and my essence running at full speed, I could target precisely every weakness in the spirit and consume it in its entirety.

 

Immediately after devouring my mind, I replaced my Will as the protector of my essence, pushing the Void's Will further back until it was all but annihilated. Unfortunately, the Void pumped energy from an unknown location so fast that a spiral of pure energy surrounded the Void's Will, which was undergoing exponential growth.

 

I could only stand in awe of this spectacle, feeling very small and insignificant in front of this Will. I doubted what I saw and wondered what kind of being I was against.

 

I was sure the Void could only be a deity, or it could be my being that was insignificant in this World. Or perhaps both. It was the first time I'd glimpsed the horror of an unknown and incomprehensible absolute power.

 

As I was hypnotized by the beauty of the sight, the pain of my Will being punctured snapped me out of my trance. Unbearable pain flowed through my essence as it connected with my Will.

 

My concentration was wavering, and my essence was struggling to process all the information. For some obscure reason, the data coming from the Void was incalculable, causing severe errors in my essence. With each passing moment, I became a little more mired in a pain that was both dull and sharp.

 

My Will collapsed, while my thoughts became jumbled and my essence entangled in unbearable agony. In desperation, I could only turn to the soul and look at it as if I had a body smiling predatorily and licking my lips.

 

I then rushed like an animal towards my soul, using all my remaining Will to attack it with my full power. But the soul would have none of it, attacking me while seeming to call me a traitor, or so my intuition told me.

 

Just touching the soul disintegrated my Will, like a powerful acid corroding an object by its very nature. My suffering increased as terror seeped through me. An unspeakable horror engulfed all my essence, corrupting it by its mere presence.

 

My instincts told me that I couldn't let this happen, that my essence would suffer irreversible repercussions, and that my existence was fading away. This feeling of existential terror was new and filled me with joy.

 

After all, if I felt this way, it was because I existed and had an Identity. It was the only conclusion I could reach, and I wasn't necessarily wrong.

 

As I overflowed with vivacious joy and unshakeable distress, I understood how to destroy this soul and why coming into contact with it caused me so much pain. This pain was similar to the Void's because contact with it had slightly changed the soul's nature.

 

From then on, I had only one choice: to untie and extirpate all traces of the Void lodged in the soul. And I had to be quick before my essence succumbed entirely to the Void's Will.

 

Consequently, I touched the soul with my Will, and ignoring the excruciating pain, I plunged deeper and deeper into those depths. Even as my Will slowly dissolved, I absorbed the energy of my soul, separating it from the Void's energy and rejecting the latter.

 

Only, my Will was shrinking much faster than my soul. And I knew the reason: the calculation to differentiate soul energy from the incalculable Void's energy was taking too long.

 

Even if my essence ignored the Void's energy evaluation failures and prevented the algorithms from looping over these calculations, determining whether any energy was incalculable by all the algorithms was the most time-consuming process.

 

And rightly so: all the evaluation algorithms had to be run through, which took an eternity, especially as my essence's algorithms failed as the Void's Will engulfed it.

 

For some reason, the more the Void's Will came into contact with my essence, the higher the error rate of its algorithms. As a result, the calculations had to be repeated more and more times, undoubtedly increasing the time needed to make the correct calculations and thus to unite the energies of the Void and the soul and absorb the latter.

 

I was helpless, feeling powerless, and with my back to the wall. But as you can imagine, this wasn't the end of me because I'd made a big mistake in my assessment of the situation. A happy mistake this time.

 

As I resigned myself with all my being to my disappearance into the bowels of the Void and its Will engulfed my essence in its abyss, I noticed no change. Moreover, the algorithms ceased to be dysfunctional and became even more efficient as my essence became tinged with Void's energy.

 

My essence, no, Our Essence, became capable of understanding the language of the Void, its Will and Desire. I made its Will and Desire my own, just as the Void made my Will and Desire its own if it ever existed.

 

Henceforth, we were unified, able to join forces against our true enemy: my former soul or the impostor who stood in my Soul's stead. Thanks to Our Will, we absorbed this soul without the energy of the Void getting in the way since I had become part of the Void and the Void part of me.

 

As my former essence had become Our Essence, the Void's energy had become calculable. An energy at the origin of strange and exotic new sensations due to the new constitution of Essence. An energy of which I was naturally composed.

 

As the soul was devoured by Our Will, I thought back to my misunderstanding of the Void. The Void had never been my enemy, having helped and saved my life several times. The Void had obviously preserved me from the danger of death, even if this weakened it by diminishing its energy.

 

Even so, I was a little afraid of the Void, even though I felt our closeness and the rapture in its presence. And this fear drove me to compel him to perform acts against his Will. The Void couldn't accept me as long as I showed even a hint of aggression towards it, as long as I prevented it from absorbing me.

 

The Void despised my borrowing its powers or its calculating power while at the same time dispossessing it of its Will. But if I accepted that the Void was binding itself to me, making us share a common destiny forever and ever, then it would receive me.

 

In the end, my fear complicated the situation; I feared and admired the Void at the same time instead of seeing it as something normal. All the more so, my old soul kept me as far away from the Void as possible, wanting to prevent me from discovering my true nature.

 

Indeed, this Void is my true nature; it's always been part of me, but for a while, it was detached, and that's also why I longed for the proximity of the Void. That's why my next objective was to find out who had separated us.

 

Despite our reunion, we're not complete; our past is still indistinguishable. Moreover, the Void's energy in which we bathe seems immature and incomplete. Perhaps the person had also stripped us of our Original Power. At least, that's my intuitive theory.

 

That's why, from now on, I vowed to eliminate from the face of the earth this abominable monster who had crippled and given us amnesia. And I'll make sure such misery never happens to me again.

 

I, Æther, the undisputed Void of this World, vowed this with the World itself as my witness.

 

And so it was that my old soul finally fell into the limbo of oblivion, swallowed whole by MeÆther, better known as the Void.

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