Lying on the deck of the naval carrier, Maki and Li were sun baking. Erzideen was a beautiful planet to be stuck in. The feel was much the same as being on Terra, though the sky of the planet was dyed a light lavender during the day, and almost always perfectly cloud free at night where millions of stars would reflect on the ocean surface. Since leaving home and going back on duty, his home had been the huge battleship that was practising combat scenarios in preparation for the reallocation of soldiers heading to the desolate system.

Raising his hand as a shadow came across his face, Maki winced up at the figure looking down at him. Having been there a week and bit so he didn’t have anyone’s names down, yet he could see the stripes on the man’s shoulders

“Sir?”

“There’s been an emergency within your family. There’s a call for you waiting below deck from a man called Samara Black”

Maki blinked and blinked again, getting to his feet as fast as he could once the news set in. Two weeks had barely passed since he’d left, and he knew Tatsumi hadn’t been feeling too well the last two days he’d been there

“Did he way what happened?”

“No. Only that it was an emergency”

Maki saluted quickly 

“Thank you, I’ll go accept the call, sir”

Jogging across the deck, taking the stairs down to the next level, cutting through the fire suppression room, then heading up the half flight of stairs, Maki arrived in the tertiary  communications room which was the only room on the ship they were allowed to receive calls at. Logging his presence by presence his pressing his comms against the receiver chip next to the door, the phone unlocked and Samara full name, planet, and coordinates appeared on the screen. The alpha’s heart was racing as he accepted 

“Samara?”

Samara answered him sounding so tired that Maki was set further on edge

“Hey, kid. Look, I’ve sent Tatsumi your way and you’re going to need to apply for leave. He left yesterday and should hit your region tomorrow”

Maki was grateful that Samara had basically told him that everyone other than Tatsumi was alright, still, he didn’t like that Tatsumi was at the centre of this

“Why? What happened?”

“Kid, I’m so sorry. Tatsumi miscarried with complications. They’ve seen him at the clinic, and I know you didn’t know about it. He didn’t either. They’ve treated him… Suzu stayed with him the day before yesterday and we pulled some strings to get him on the next flight possible. It’s been… 12 hours now”

Feeling as if he’d jumped off the side of the battleship into the ice cold water they’d been headed for, Maki’s heart was racing and everything seems to turn cold. How? When? They were still using protection.

“They’re sure?”

“They are. His body didn’t pass it properly so they performed a minor surgery. I’ve been trying to get a line through, but because they’ve got the whole damn fleet out for these friendly fires,  it took time to find you. He collapsed and couldn’t get up. It wasn’t good”

Maki’s brain stayed stuck

“We used protection and Suzu said he…”

Samara’s voice turned cold, goosebumps coming up across his skin as the fellow alpha snarled

“Tatsumi wasn’t having an affair if that’s what you’re implying. He’s not slept with anyone other than you, so don’t you dare try passing the blame on this one. He didn’t know he was pregnant until he collapsed. I didn’t want him to go on is fucking own, but he has and you’d better get your arse into gear”

That hadn’t been what the alpha had been trying to say. Maki simply didn’t understand how it’d happened. He knew how “it’d happened” but not “how it’d happened”

“That’s not what I’m saying. I’m not passing the blame”

“You better fucking not be. I’m the one who took him to the clinic. I’m the one who held his hand. I’m the one who covered his eyes so he didn’t have to see what they were doing. I picked my best friend up off the floor. They’ve started the growth process… our baby is growing. He was the first person we wanted to know”

Maki got it. Samara thought he hadn’t done enough about Tatsumi feeling ill when he’d left. His boyfriend’s previous history with fevers and bleeding left him leaving it to Tatsumi as he couldn’t possibly understand this boyfriend was going through without being in his skin. His omega would have been so scared. So alone. And Samara had this amazing piece of news that he couldn’t tell his best friend about. Each syllable seemed to stick on Maki’s lips as he whispered

“Congratulations”

“Thanks. Go request leave. I’ve made his travel arrangements on cargo ship EACN-65 and he’ll be staying at the Red Ship Hotel in Pamada. We wanted someone to go with him, but he wouldn’t let us. He’s not in a good way at all. He’s taken his medication, make sure he takes it”

“Okay…”

“And kid, I’m sorry. I know you two wanted a family”

“Yeah. Thank you for calling”

Hanging up, Maki didn’t remember doing so. The world around him no longer felt real as he left the communication room. The part of the sea they were in was relatively calm, but it seened the ship was rocking violent back. Having followed him, yet lacking permission, Li took him by the arm once he’d passed through the fire suppression room. The stairs between floors were too steep to sit on, Li forced to help him into a small alcove towards the side of the ship 

“Maki? Man? What happened?”

“I was going to be a father. Tatsumi miscarried badly”

Li pulled him against as Maki dissolved into tears, he felt as if his heart was physically breaking spreading pain through his tightening chest as those broken parts broke further

“I’m so sorry”

“I didn’t know… I don’t know how… Samara lost his temper at me and I’m so confused. I don’t know what to do. He’s coming here…”

“If he’s coming here, then you’ll need to book leave. Have you heard from Tatsumi… no, you wouldn’t have. Shit… I don’t know what to do either”

“Samara stayed with him for it… he… he… fuuuuuck!”

A baby wasn’t in their plans yet. He’d signed on to continue his service and Tatsumi was going to graduate. They’d been careful. They were careful. Tatsumi had worked so hard to get healthy again and was still told he shouldn’t be able to conceive. Then… then they’d made a little and he’d lost it. Maki didn’t know the words for it but lost sounded too much like an accusation… a baby…

“Shhh. You’ll be okay. You’ll be okay. If Samara’s coming then Tatsumi must be okay to be alone”

“Tatsumi’s coming here. Samara got him on a ship here… Samara’s going to be a dad because their turn came up… we weren’t even trying”

“We’ll do your leave forms then I’ll help you pack. We’ll sign over custody of your mech to me while you’re on shore. I won’t let anything happen to it”

“Thank you…”

“You’re welcome, man. Let Li take care of this. We’ll go pack first and clean up your face, then go see the CO”

“What if they won’t approve leave?”

“Samara wouldn’t have let Tatsumi come all this way if he thought they’d say no. I’ll smuggle you off if I have to”

“Thanks…”

Taken down to their room by Li, Maki’s numb brain kept going back to when they’d house sat for Mizune and Samara. They’d chosen a clinic with an excellent track record for their artificial womb developments, meaning they’d had to go for a week and needed someone to house sit their dog. Hell, Tatsumi had roped him into taking Samara out for a fancy evening to celebrate the decision. Mizune wanted to conceive naturally, but she was also fiercely passionate about her job. Her and Tatsumi had spent a lot of time talking about it. It’d been a good week. He’d worried about Tatsumi’s mental state over the news, yet his omega couldn’t be more supportive of the pair if he tried. Maki wanted to be happier for them.

He and Tatsumi had their own plans about that. Maki knew how much Tatsumi wanted to settle down with him and that he’d like to have a baby before his eyesight diminished further. He’d been put up for training, and with Tatsumi in mind he’d wanted to say no, yet Tatsumi had been so happy for him. Truthfully he wanted his omega to say yes, and had struggled being torn between both desires. He’d planned to propose on the day his boyfriend graduated, to be waiting with a large bouquet of red roses and the ring. If he took the leadership position there was a chance he could ask Tatsumi to join him… but he’d held back asking that as he didn’t want to force his omega into saying yes without thinking it all through.

Looking at the tattooed ring on his finger, the last time they’d gone he’d gotten it redone in permanent ink and so had Tatsumi. He’d shocked his boyfriend on his first leave by organising the appointment and surprising him on the day. They’d had their fair shares of ups and downs since then. He’d nearly quit altogether when he got news that one of his past fellow recruits had died in action. He’d cried into his comms for hours, with Tatsumi counselling him through the pain. He couldn’t compare that to what Tatsumi was currently going through. The shock and then the cause. Tatsumi had said he’d thought he’d picked up a bug, and with them having taken precautions that made sense. Pregnancy hadn’t come up on their radar at all. No. Both of them were looking forward to Tatsumi having his degree and possibly applying to Rage Fire where he hoped to take over teaching military history.

He’d be so good at it too. Tatsumi always knew the right thing to do. He knew how to talk to scientists and he knew how to talk to pilots. When Maki had taken possession of Tatsumi’s mech, he’d known his boyfriend wanted to keep finding his way through his new path where piloting wasn’t an option. Since then his omega had pestered him up about upgrading, yet having Tatsumi’s mech made him infinitely proud. The tiger on its chest reminded him that even after nearly two years, Tatsumi still kept that damn stuffed tiger he’d won him close to him in bed.

“Maki, I’ve downloaded the leave forms and filled in what I could for you. I put your reason for leave as death in the family, is that okay?”

Blinking at Li, he was struck all over again. Technically it was true. It was also the most likely reason for accepting sudden leave… but that would make it the death of his child and that… that…. Shit. Wiping at his face, he hated this. He hated it all. If he could take Li with him he would have. Dumping this on his best friend and running… Li by his side was the one constant out here that never changed

“I’m sorry”

“Dude, no. Whatever you’re apologising for, no. We don’t know the details and I know Tatsumi would have called, but if it’s this bad you need to think about you and him”

“I don’t deserve you”

“You don’t deserve this. Is there anything else you want to take?”

“No… I don’t know how much leave to apply for”

“Take a week, and if you come back early you come back early”

“What if they won’t give me a week?”

“Then take a couple of days. I won’t let anyone mess with your mech”

“I’m more worried about you”

“I’ll be okay”

Maki took the three steps over to Li and wrapped his arms around him

“You’d better be. I don’t care what you have to do, don’t get hurt”

“I won’t. I’m far too handsome”

The joke was lame, but the sentiment appreciated

“Thanks. I have to go see our CO”

“I’ll come with you. I don’t know if they’ll let you go tonight, but in any case, you shouldn’t be alone right now”

“It’s not me… it’s Tatsumi”

“It was your baby too, don’t be strong because you think you have to”

“I have to be until I get to him”

“Alright, but don’t let him push you away. Omegas can take these things really hard. I remember you saying that in the past”

“This is why you’re my best friend. It doesn’t feel right to dump it on you”

“Dump away”

“Not yet. Leave first”

“Okay”