CHAPTER 24

Lumiea

Year -20 (L.D.)

 

After tireless training for months, Aeryn's squad took Commander Vehru's personal order for the three days off seriously. They combined money from their allowance, flew out to the coast, and rented a small cabin by the beach. On their first day, they took a boat out on the water and eventually stopped to swim. Together they waded in the crystal clear water. It was still too cold this time of year, but the full body suits kept them warm enough that Aeryn managed to forget.

The water washed away Aeryn's stress.

“I'm telling you," Jace said. "I tried this once. Our flight mods actually work really well under water for short distances.”

"I never considered this possibility." Nikka slapped her hands against the water in a yell. "Damn it, now I have to get the mod and dedicate my life to its mastery."

Aeryn chuckled.

"Hear me out." Her friend treaded closer to Jace. "The ultimate dolphin ride. You, me, your thrusters."

Jace hummed. "I like to at least get flowers before we get dirty like that."

They both burst out in laughter.

"I need no frills, Nikka." Alix winked. "Just so you know."

Nikka rolled her eyes. "I'm sure you don't. But you don’t have a flight mod, so you’re worthless to me.“ She grabbed Jace's shoulder. ”Seriously, though. Please take me for a non-dirty ride. Like the least dirty ride of my life."

Jace snorted. "Fine. Non-dirty dolphin rides open for business." He turned his back to her.

"Really?" Nikka squealed like a kid and threw her arms around his neck, clasping her elbows. Her cheek pressed against his. It didn't seem like the thought to feel self-conscious had ever crossed Nikka’s mind a day in her life. "I'm so scared and excited."

"This might be dangerous,“ Jace said. ”I've never tried carrying someone around before."

"It's fine. I'll live. Fair warning that I'm latching on tight."

Jace tugged at the arms at his neck. "I noticed."

What if Nikka fell and broke her neck? Or they both fell and broke both their necks? Aeryn shook off the worry. They were adults. Very capable adults. No sense in worrying.

"Go!" Nikka screamed, already throwing her head back.

Jace shot his arms to the side and they careened forward out of control, skidding on top of the water. Nikka shrieked and laughed at the same time until the ocean swallowed them and her cries entirely.

"Shit." Lyon swam closer.

Jace emerged, followed a moment later by Nikka. They gasped for breath and caught one another, laughing.

"I think I know what to do now." Jace motioned. "Let's try again."

They tried a few more times just traveling shorter distances. Then they both nodded to say they were ready–each wearing serious expressions now, because this had somehow become competitive.

Jace shot beneath the water with Nikka holding tight. Water arched and swirled around them as their bodies torpedoed through the ocean. Every so often they came up for air, only to twist back beneath the surface. The group swam around to catch glimpses of them flying beneath their feet.

"Look at them!" Trin said, more excited than normal. Adorable.

The two shot up out of the water, flipped through the air, and dove back in a squeal of laughter.

Aeryn was officially jealous.

When they emerged next, they broke the surface of the water and submerged deep beneath. Aeryn covered her mouth when they flew straight up into the sky next, higher and higher.

"Wait–" Nikka left her scream trailing behind them as they climbed. "Jace!"

One deft twist and they were free falling to the ocean. He clasped his hands in a dive to break their fall.

She surfaced separate from him. "That was way too high!"

Jace was already laughing when he emerged from the water. There was no trace of worry or stress on his face. In the brightness of the daylight, he pushed his hair back and sank down to float on the water, a very different image than he made on their average day when he refused to tear his attention from their work. "That was fun."

"Asshole." Nikka shuddered. "I told you heights make me nervous."

"You loved it."

She grinned then. "It was so fun. Who's next?"

"I need a break."

"Toughen up, Jace."

He gave her a look like she was crazy. "Do you know how exhausting it is to use these just for myself? Much less you?"

"Then you shouldn't have shown off by flying thirty feet in the air."

"That has to be a record. From the water at least." Lyon nodded appreciatively. "I'll try it too. Who wants a ride?" He looked at each of them, offering his shoulders.

“I don’t know if Trin or Aeryn should,” Nikka said. “It was really hard to hold on, especially under water. Plus, they could get hurt worse than we do.”

Normally it didn’t bother Aeryn when combat soldiers treated her as more fragile. She was. That was the point of combat soldiers. They’d trained and modded their bodies to be effective in combat. Even their bones were stronger from painful treatments they'd endured as students. Trin and Aeryn had different objectives. But it annoyed her today. Between this and Commander Vehru saying everyone had to prioritize her life because of the Witness Program, she felt frustrated at being handled with kid gloves.

“I want to do it.” Aeryn swam closer. “Just don’t take me under water.”

Nikka and Jace both looked at one another wearily.

“I’m not made of glass. Come on.”

Her friend winced. “The falls I took might have broken your bones.”

“So be more careful.” Aeryn sighed. “Aren’t you the one always telling me I should have more fun?”

“Fine,” Jace said. “But I’m taking you. We don’t need our bioengineer cracking her skull before we head out.”

“I’m at least moderately, if not severely, offended,” Lyon said in monotone. "To insinuate I can't handle taking Aeryn."

“He did win the match,” Nikka muttered, earning a splash of water from Lyon.

“Trin?” Alix asked.

“You all know the answer.” Trin pinched her brows. "Do you want me to share my calculations for the risk? It varies based on scenario–"

Alix groaned loudly. "Stop it, Trin." Then he latched onto Lyon. “Let's go already. I’ll take my ride extra dirty, please.”

“Be careful what you ask for,” Lyon said.

“Please. I know you told Nikka you find me repulsive. I have feelings, you know.”

Lyon merely grinned without denying it. “It’s not your face. It’s not your body.”

“It’s your personality,” Nikka finished for him.

Alix groaned again. “Forget it. I don’t even want my dirty dolphin ride anymore.”

Lyon rolled his eyes and grabbed Alix’s arm. “Don't throw a fit.”

The two continued to bicker when Jace turned toward Aeryn. “Say something if you even think you could fall. Okay?”

“Since when are you such a worrier?" Aeryn raised both brows. "I’ll be fine. I'm out of my little lab. Let me live a little.”

But Jace only sighed. “Hold on tight.”

“I’m so scared,” Aeryn said with an excited giggle.

“Me too.”

“Jace! Stop it, already. You're ruining it. What's all that training for if you can't even handle this?”

Aeryn had to bite the inside of her cheek because it was too easy to goad Jace when it came to anything he trained on and she could tell she'd managed to play on his competitiveness well enough for him to not complain anymore. He caught her wrist and pulled her closer.

"You better not let go, because Commander Vehru will slaughter me if I kill her precious Witness candidate."

Aeryn knew that she’d feel embarrassed about climbing onto Jace’s back. If she’d even considered dating like Nikka always told her to, it might not feel so awkward. But she wasn’t used to being very close to guys and Jace already had a way of making her nervous. His mix of confidence and aloofness made it hard to feel comfortable with him. So she’d prepared herself to ignore it and pretend she was not flustered. In fact, when she first wrapped her arms around his neck, she actually felt proud of herself for her level of comfort.

Except that Jace hooked his arms beneath her knees and closed her legs tight around him. “Lock your ankles. Grab your elbows.”

Her body smashed against his back so tightly she could feel him breathing. The thickness of his chest and shoulders forced her to stretch to really latch on. The body suits suddenly seemed far too tight. Uncomfortably tight.

Aeryn nearly let go and changed her mind.

“Ready?” he asked quietly.

Her mouth was by his ear and she was close enough to notice the individual drops of water sliding down the side of his face. “Yeah.”

Jace slid his hands to the side and they were airborne, flying above the water. All the awkwardness disappeared as the momentum hit her. Aeryn squeezed him as tight as she could as she screamed. The thrill swept through her stomach like a wave smacking against her.

“Hold on!” Jace yelled.

She squeezed tighter, laughing and screaming at once as he twisted into a barrel roll. Whipping around, he flew closer to the water and then rolled so his body was beneath hers. They hit the water hard, nearly wrenching her from him, until finally the waters swallowed them up.

It was disorienting to fly through the air and then plunge into the water. Jace surfaced, dragging her up with him by the arms.

Aeryn squeezed her eyes shut against the water, laughing. “That was amazing. You feel that all the time?”

Jace held onto her still, smiling too. “You didn’t break your bones.”

“I told you I’d be fine.” Aeryn wiped her face. “Maybe I picked the wrong line of work. I should have been a combat soldier."

"None of us would have stood a chance with you kicking our asses."

With the laughter dying and the adrenaline waning, Aeryn noticed his closeness again, his warmth. Their eyes met for a moment, light shining brightly over the two of them, catching against the water, against his reddish eyes.

Alix's roar ripped through the air and her eyes widened to see him lift one hand above his head as he and Lyon climbed through the air, his hand mod glowing.

Jace eased back toward the others.

"Wait. That's it? One little, short ride?"

He hesitated. "Guess we could do one more."

She swam over to him and latched on, too full of adrenaline still to feel uncomfortable. "Ready." She squeezed her eyes shut at the anticipation, only they didn't move.

Peaking her eyes open, she saw Jace twist his head to see her. "Do you ever wonder we'd be thinking if we could have seen this when we were kids?" His voice was quiet and face close. "Both of us here like this."

The longing for home and the warmth of nostalgia softened her heart. "I don't think we would have believed it."

"I'm glad you made it, Aerie."

Jace took off while her insides still had that softened feeling and for a moment, as the wind first hit her and her stomach flopped with the force of their movement, Aeryn could easily imagine that young girl in her place. Holding onto her childhood friend, the one who at times felt like a stranger, and at others like the only piece of home she'd ever have.

 

#

Patrol was different this time, and not only because it would last a full month instead of two weeks. They seemed to be out in the real world this time, whereas before the ruins of that town must have been a training ground. Mostly it was that they were different now, a true team, with the bond that had once felt foreign and scary now as much a part of them as their own hearts. Aeryn knew it would only deepen. It was no longer hard to imagine that.

They'd entered a zone which the rebels had always controlled and had recently been recaptured from them. It was a large area, though, and people had lived here in their homes for a long time. While they all were under the rule of the rebels, many of them were not soldiers, but civilians. So Aeryn's squad was tasked with visiting towns within the zone to personally share instructions on what to do moving forward.

"You'll be allowed to return to your home once it's determined that you're prepared to follow our laws and that you don't pose a safety threat to any citizen."

Trin delivered the speech to a middle-aged woman who stared at them with eyes that looked lifeless and skeptical. They'd said it to dozens of others just today.

"We know this is a challenge for you, but we assure you that you will be home soon enough."

The woman looked at each of them. "It's not as if I have a choice. If I don't comply, you'll take me into custody."

Guilt twisted Aeryn's gut. She wanted to believe that these people would all return to their homes like they said, but clearly their loyalties lay with the rebels. It was possible some of them would never leave custody. Once they had visited everyone in the town, they stopped near the center of town for a rest.

"How accurate is this census?" Nikka scrolled down the list. "They live low-tech so the omni-AI has to send drones to get information. They could easily be hiding people."

"That's why we need to search thoroughly once we're done." Trin sighed. "Let's take a break. We've visited all the houses. After we've given them time to pack a bag and get to the airbus, we'll search."

Leaving even one person behind could have terrible consequences. Not all rebels were terrorists, but some did resort to such acts. One person with nothing to lose could hurt many people.

They split up in order to search once everyone had boarded the airbus. Empty house after empty house met Aeryn. Her chest was aching as she thought of these homes left abandoned, just like the ones in the town where they first patrolled had been.

When she reached the cellar of her sixth house, she froze in the doorway.

"Ma'am?"

An elderly woman sat in a chair in the corner of the room, sewing a hole in a shirt. Her gaze lifted to Aeryn for only a moment and then she sighed heavily. "Yes, child."

For a moment, she could only stare in shock. Was she confused? Unwell? "What's your name? Are you on the census?"

"I've never been on that. Told them I don't want my name recorded."

"Everyone in town has orders–"

"Oh, I know what the orders are." She lowered the shirt to her lap and looked up fully this time. "I will not be joining you on the airbus."

"That's not an option."

"Of course, it is."

"No, it isn't."

"If I refuse to leave, you won't put me on that airbus. You'll arrest me. So it looks like the airbus is not the only option."

Shock made her voice stick in her throat. "Are you afraid to go with them?" What harm could one elderly woman do? She didn't look like she would even be able to get around easily. It seemed cruel to force her onto the bus. Aeryn looked around outside to see if anyone could hear them and then entered the cellar. "Leave and I won't tell anyone I saw you here."

"I'm not leaving my home." She laughed and shook her head. "Oh, no. I'm not. I've lived here for twenty years."

"You'll be arrested if you stay."

The older woman shrugged as she continued stitching the shirt on her lap. "Do what you have to do."

"Do what I…" She caught herself before she could speak too loudly and whispered in a harsh voice. "What's wrong with you?"

"I told you I'm not leaving my home. You'll have to take me away. Before you tell me that's just stubbornness or that it's pointless, understand this. I swore to never surrender. So I won't."

Anger burrowed beneath the disbelief. "Why would you throw away so much for a fight you'll never win? You'll hurt yourself and others. Don't you know your life is worth more than that?"

The woman simply chuckled in response. "You're new to this aren't you? Your eyes are still young. I'm sure you think you've seen suffering with all that training you've had. And you have endured some. Leaving your family behind is a suffering no one should know." She met Aeryn's eyes. "Soon you'll know a far greater suffering, though. You'll take life, and each life you take will kill you. Over and over."

The words squeezed something in her chest. The knowing in this woman's eyes was so deep that Aeryn could not claim she was confused or that she didn't know what she was doing. It made her feel like a child. "All worlds have war."

"All worlds." The elderly woman closed her eyes with her wiry white eyebrows furrowing. "I truly hate that line, though I suppose it is accurate. All worlds to ever exist have had wars. All people to ever live have had to make choices in those wars–whether they're the kinds of wars we know are happening or the kind happening beneath our noses. I am not all people, though. I'm not in all worlds. I choose to say no." Her brows pinched. "You hear me? I say no. Damn the consequences or what could be."

It had never occurred to Aeryn to simply say no. Seeing someone do it was like watching a person set fire to their house. "The war would be over if you stopped fighting."

Clasping the arm of the chair with shaky hands, she pushed herself up, slightly hunched. Her weathered hands reached for Aeryn and took her own gently between them. In a quiet voice, she whispered, "Exactly." A smile deepened the wrinkles in her cheeks. "If I war against them, the fight isn't over. It's much harder to fight a war no one else cares to fight, you know."

"Why would you want this war to continue? Why suffer?"

"You'll understand one day. We all come to understand it, if they let us remember, that is. Your time will come and maybe they'll let you go free like they did for me. Not that they said it so plainly. I escaped and who can escape them? I'm sure they let me. We all have our roles to play."

Maybe she was just crazy. "Okay. I think we need to head to the airbus."

"We're target practice, child. They let us rebel just for the sake of training you kids. Those of us who've been around long enough to realize it can't stop fighting. We're too stubborn. Too hopeless, maybe. Too angry to simply give up." She squeezed her hand tight. "They could end this war if they wanted to. It's not all on us. But I am proud of each day that I have the strength to say no when so many say yes."

Her eyes felt hot with tears. Did Aeryn really want to be the one to end so many years of fighting for this woman? Because she could see that as hard as she had fought to make it in this program, this woman had fought against the Federation. They weren't on the same side, but there was kinship here in their dedication.

"Please get on the airbus," she whispered. "Please."

"I'll tell you what. You're a nice girl. I'll sneak to the next town over. And I'll wait until you're gone to come back, so you don't have to be the one to do it."

"Damn it, don't tell me that." Aeryn pulled away. "Can't you just take your life and run?"

The woman smiled a stubborn sort of grin. "Remember what I said. And when it's rolling around in your mind late at night, when it whispers to the doubts in your mind, ask yourself. What do they want with us? Why did the Federation come here in the first place?"

"Fine." Aeryn backed up. "I'm leaving. I never saw you. Just know if you stay, someone's going to find you."

Before this woman could plant anymore ideas in her head, she turned and fled the cellar, only to catch glimpse of a broad-shouldered shadow in the doorway.

Aeryn's heart jolted. Jace crouched just outside, listening.

Now he would alert the others, and then who knew what would happen. Had Aeryn just destroyed a lifetime of agonizing training to help one frail woman? Only Jace didn't say anything. He held her eyes a moment longer, rose to his feet, and started to walk away without calling it in.

"You're not going to–"

"No." Jace turned around. "And we're never going to talk about it."

"What are you doing here anyway? this was my house to search."

He shifted. "I thought I should check on you."

Aeryn gripped her fists. "I'm qualified to be out here. I don't need a babysitter."

"Commander Vehru–"

"Never asked you to babysit me." Remembering the insanely huge favor he'd just done for her by keeping quiet, Aeryn caught hold of her temper. "Sorry."

"Just be careful, Aerie. It's a wonderful quality to never lose hope in the world, but it's dangerous to be so trusting. I don't want to see you get hurt."

"What's your excuse then? If I'm doing this because I'm too trusting, then why are you letting me get away with it? You could take that lady in without telling anyone what I did."

"Because she's right." He met her eyes. "Giving up is never an option."

As often as the old woman's words would fill her mind, it was Jace's voice that haunted her the most in the end. Because she didn't know exactly what he meant. Whether he sympathized with the old woman's spirit. Or if he sympathized with her cause.