Leon had led us back to the shop where he worked, its walls lined with shelves upon shelves of greasy mechanical parts. The sharp scent of oil and metal filled the air, mingling with the musty odor of old machinery. The building itself seemed to have been cobbled together with scrap iron, its foundation a patchwork of different materials. A true testament to the industrial nature of this place.

As we walked, my leg began to give out from exhaustion and my head spun with images of death and monsters. It was hard to focus on anything else. Death seemed to loom over everything now. I clenched my jaw tightly, trying to hold onto some semblance of control.

Every time I looked at Isabella, a sour lump would form in my throat. Her eyes, surrounded by long lashes, used to sparkle with mischief but now they held an immeasurable darkness. The smirk on her face only added to my frustration and confusion; it felt like she was laughing at my expense.

"I-Isabella," I managed to choke out, my voice rough with emotion. My hand clenched into a fist at my side. Beside me, Jeb raised an eyebrow, watching the exchange without comment. His keen gaze moved from Isabella to me, his lips pressing into a thin line.

Isabella turned her head slightly, meeting my gaze head-on with a look that held no remorse. "What is it?" she questioned, the playful tone of her voice belying the seriousness of her eyes.

"I...I just..." I started, but the words seemed stuck in my throat. Everything that needed to be said was too heavy, too hard to put into words. How do you tell someone that their laughter feels like a mockery?

She finally turned her attention towards me, her dark eyes seeming impenetrable; her smirk remained unfazed.

"Why are you angry? You knew what I was," her words came out far too casual. 

Leon went over to the counter to search for something, while Jeb offered support as I leaned against the doorframe. My gaze lingered on the floor.

"Your leg is still acting up, huh?" Jeb asked quietly, taking off his hat. But his attempt to interject did nothing to stop me from looking back up at Isabella.

"Because you didn't tell me everythin’," I fired back bitterly. The only source of light was a flickering bulb hanging from the ceiling, casting wavering shadows around us.

Isabella's expression showed a hint of guilt, just a hint. "I didn't think every little detail mattered."

A surge of anger rushed through me at her nonchalant attitude.

"Not important? Isabella, we're not talkin’ about minor details here. What do these bloodsuckers want from you? Tell me the truth." I shook my head and felt a twitch in my hand. My body was drained and my leg throbbed with pain. But my mind was starting to clear.

"They...they have plans for me," she said with little emotion.

I furrowed my brow, unsure of what she meant by that. Did it make her special, like a royal member among them, similar to what Leon once was? I took a deep breath and forced myself to relax my tense muscles. My leg was throbbing more intensely now and beads of sweat formed on my forehead. There had to be more information she wasn't providing - what the deal really was between her and her kin. At this point it seemed like we needed to know everything, I needed to know everything. Anything that would better assist me, to know what I was going to face when it came to saving my brother. In a way her lack of truth was unfair. 

Leon interjected, pushing himself off the the counter where he had ended up leaning. "You're nothing but a loophole for them to expand their bloodline."

Isabella's posture straightened even more, and I caught a glimpse of something in her eyes.

She had known all along, this wasn't new information to her. 

Leon took a few steps closer. I saw Jeb out the corner of my eye suddenly standing closer to him, as if getting ready to intervene. But no intervention happened, the atmosphere felt heavy, the tension thickening. I turned my attention back to Isabella, though she seemed unbothered, her gaze never left his. It didn't look like she feared him. 

Leon's face darkened.

"And I bet you like the way that makes you feel. All special." Leon took another few steps. When he didn't stop, I swallowed thickly, readying my good leg to put myself between them if needed. "Well, you listen here. They don't give a fuck 'bout you. They take and take until there's nothing left."

Leon took a moment, and his gaze slipped past hers and met with mine. His mechanical eye glowed bright red for just a moment. And it scared me a bit, his mood shifting with his movements as he didn't stand far from me. 

All the aggression Leon had shown to Isabella earlier and now had been out of revenge. that much became clear the more I looked at him. Because someone important to him, a vampire who loved him as a son was brutally murdered by her family.

My gut twisted and I looked toward the ground, suddenly feeling sick.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and glanced up to see Jeb's concerned face. His eyes searched mine for a moment before he murmured, "Keep it together, alright? Just... keep breathing."

An exhausted sigh pushed past my lips as I nodded, turning my focus back toward the brewing confrontation. Leon was now standing so close to Isabella that I could see the tension in his jaw, the hard set of his mouth. Even from where I stood, I could feel the energy between them crackling like a live wire.

Isabella stood her ground, refusing to back down despite Leon's fierce growls. A menacing sound emanated from deep in his throat as he took a step closer, until my brother intervened and placed a hand on his chest, halting his advance.

"Enough, Leon," Jeb warned calmly. “You already said what you had to say. No more.” His voice was steady, unyielding. It was a voice he used when tending to our sick cattle back home, a voice that was clear in its intention: healing, not harming.

Leon's muscles tightened and he instinctively recoiled. He backed away with clenched fists and a jaw that could have cracked walnuts. Keeping his gaze fixed on the ground, he took several deep breaths, as if trying to quell the rage boiling inside him. Eventually, he shook his head and stormed off up a nearby staircase.

Jeb leaned in closer and spoke in a hushed tone, gesturing towards Isabella. "He's right. They're after you. Your blood is the key to something big."

"Thanks for stating the obvious," Isabella muttered, her voice trembling with pain as she walked past us towards the door. Jeb looked up and let his hand fall to his side as he watched her leave the room.

The room seemed to grow quieter as the door shut behind her, a cold emptiness swallowing the space. The air still held a charge; an aftershock of Leon's wrath and Isabella's defiance.

I tried to shake off the lingering tension, shifting my weight onto my good leg. But my movements felt robotic, devoid of any feeling.

As if I were a puppet on strings.

 

__________________________________________________________________________________

 

Upstairs, I laid on a plush bed, sinking into the soft mattress and allowing my thoughts to drift. Images of Isabella lingered in my mind, her confident and fierce presence still rolling within me. I couldn't help feeling frustrated and somewhat angry with myself.

Here I was, fixated on a woman who had likely been using me for her own gain, while Ben's safety hung in the balance. It made me wonder if all women were capable of such manipulation, using their beauty as a weapon before discarding those who fell for their charm. The thought weighed heavily, but I pushed it away. There were more pressing matters at hand.

In front of me, Leon and Jeb sat in two sturdy chairs pulled up close to the fireplace. Their attention was fixed on the dancing flames, casting flickering shadows across their faces. My brother sat hunched over, his broad shoulders tense as he rested his elbows on his thighs. Even through his stoic demeanor, I could almost see the weight of his thoughts, and wondered what he was thinking about - how he felt.

His hands were folded together, knuckles white, fingers gripped so tightly it was as if he was trying to hold onto a dying part of himself. His chin was tucked low and his eyes bore a far-off look, the kind that reminded me of Daddy when he would sit out on the porch at sunset, staring at the old oak tree where all the siblings had carved our initials many summers ago. It was the same look he wore when he'd realize Jeb had left the ranch for a pack of gunslingers – a mixture of disappointment and resignation.

The day Jeb left started just like any other. We woke before dawn and gathered in the big kitchen. Jeb didn't eat much. He pushed his food around on his plate, the lines on his forehead etched deeper than usual. He kept glancing at Daddy, as if he was about to say something but couldn't quite find the words. We had all gone out like normal after that, but when the sun set later that day - Jeb hadn’t been there. He'd just... vanished, like the smoke from Daddy's pipe dissipating into the night sky.

News of his involvement with a gang came a few weeks later, I remember a younger Ben trying to hide the newspaper from Uncle. A grainy black and white photo of Jeb, half-smiling in a way that he only did when he was up to something. The headline screamed of a daring bank heist and there, in print, was the name of my big brother. I remember how the paper felt in my hands, cold and unforgiving. How I’d crumbled it into a ball, as if compressing it could somehow erase the information it held.

Leon's single silver eye seemed to glint dangerously in the firelight. Neither of them spoke; their silent company offered a sense of comfort, and I allowed myself to sink further into my own contemplation. I wondered about Leon too, what his secrets were - who was he before he was a bloodsucker? Sure, I knew Jebs story, but I didn’t know his. Where was he from? What did he miss? He had a calmness about him that he wore like a cloak, but beneath the surface I could sense a deep longing, a yearning for something forever lost to him.

Beneath those questions was another - what were we going to do about Isabella? And what were our next steps? Now that I had learned more about Isabella's mother and where she came from, there were countless questions left unanswered. She had only given me a small glimpse into her world before, but now that more was revealed, I couldn't help but feel uneasy about it all. I despised being caught up in this mess that I didn't ask for. The part of my brain that hated secrets and lies resurfaced, reminding me of the lurking vampires and the fact that my brother and uncle had been taken. Childhood stories now felt like grim realities.

Despite the comfort of the room and its peaceful atmosphere, anger brewed within me again, refusing to dissipate as it begged to be released.

It all really seemed to boil down to the fact Isabella had manipulated and used me as a pawn in her escape plan or revenge plot - whatever it was. And yet, despite all of this, I couldn't deny my love for her. Even with everything being so complicated, my feelings for her remained true. No one had ever gotten under my skin so quickly before. But at the same time, I also hated her with an intensity that I couldn't exactly describe.

"Eli." Leon's voice cut through the silence, snapping me out of my spiraling thoughts. His words held the weight and gravity of a man who had been in charge before and did his fair share of commanding and making decisions for everybody else. "Can you shut it?"

"Didn't say anythin’." I retorted.

"Well, you're loud."

I shot up and swung my feet over the side of the bed, glaring at him. The bed creaked beneath the movement and it's rusty springs groaned loudly at being disturbed.

Leon tapped the side of his forehead with a finger. "I can hear it."

I raised a brow, looking between him and my brother for some kind of understanding. "You can hear what?"

Leon shifted his weight in the chair, crossing his arms. The leather  made a squelching sound. I swear I saw Jeb smirk. "The thoughts. I can hear your thoughts."

"No you can’t." I laughed humorlessly. Leon simply nodded, which meant my thoughts really were blaring out my emotions. I stood up then, adjusting my jeans, perhaps not really believing what he was telling me. Leon exhaled deeply, the creases and lines in his face deepening, as if he were far older than any man would've guessed.

"Yes, Eli." He gave a cursory glance toward the stairs, as if silently checking to make sure Isabella wasn't listening in, which she obviously wasn't.

"What's that look?" My brother asked him.

"Isabella...there's a block," Leon explained, waving a hand in the direction of his head as his words came slowly. He turned his gaze to me, eyes widening slightly. "Something is inhibiting me from hearing her."

I studied his face, my mind still struggling to comprehend what he had just told me. His words hung in the air between us, igniting a small flicker of hope within my chest. If Leon couldn't hear Isabella's thoughts, then that meant she had some control. Could it also mean that she truly did care for me? After all, if she was trying to use me, wouldn't she allow Leon to hear her thoughts as a way to further distort me?

But those hopeful thoughts quickly faded as the weight of our situation came crashing back down on me. Ben was still missing and we were no closer to finding him.

I watched a small smile quirked at the edge of Leon’s lips. If not for his warped features, and his singular metallic eye, it might have seemed charming. But it didn't feel charming at all, and my patience, having run thin a long time ago, finally broke.

"Can anyone talk fuckin' normal here?" I exclaimed, throwing my hands up. I had to ball my fists and take a calming breath. "Cut to the dang chase. Can't y'all just let me marinate in my anger? Why won't you, just for a fuckin' minute - give me that chance?" I glanced toward Leon. "We might as well talk this over before my brain explodes. All the crazy shit it's trying to tell me. It's the most action it's had, probably." 

A beat passed, and then another before Jeb, that bastard, burst into a round of uproarious laughter.

"What?" I shot at him, planting my hands on my hips.

"That was a fuckin' mess," He said, covering his mouth as his whole body shook. Leon shook his head, trying hard not to smirk.

"You a mindreader too, Jeb?" I asked.

"No, but that doesn't mean I'm stupid." He replied, sobering himself slightly and wiped a stray tear from his eye. "I ain't blind, you know."

I gaped for a few seconds, then scoffed.

"Fuck you." Was it really that obvious what Isabella had done?

I let my hands drop, hoping I'd find some kind of composure in the action. But then I turned back to Leon, anger still burning in my eyes. "Maybe you oughtta stop listenin' to my every thought, huh? That'd be a whole hell of a lot more comfortable for me."

Leon leaned back into his chair, filling the room with another groan from the springs. The lines on his face seemed to deepen further as he met my gaze. "I can't help it, Eli," he said, his voice quiet. "Your thoughts are loud. It's hard not to listen."

"Then try harder," I shot back, my voice sharp as a knife's edge. That was when I caught sight of Jeb's eyes. He looked away from me, perhaps to give me the space I was demanding, or maybe it was guilt gnawing at him.

The hands on the old clock hanging on the wall continued their relentless march toward dawn, or whatever fucking time it really was outside of here. Time wasn't on our side and we all knew it. Things were becoming even more complicated than they already were.

Leon finally broke the oppressive silence that settled between us, his voice rasping and dry from exhaustion

"Alright, then," he said, rubbing at his temples with a sigh. "Let's reel this in a bit. We've got a missing brother to find and an empath we can't control."

"Empath? Really, you think so?" Jeb asked, his eyes flicking up to meet Leon's. I glanced between them, my mind still trying to piece together the puzzle before me.

"She can feel what other people are feeling," Leon clarified, perhaps for me as it seemed Jeb knew what he was talking about. He leaned forward in his chair, his metallic eye taking on an eerie glow in the dim light of the room. "She has control over the emotions of those around her."

"But she won't use it for bad, right?" Jeb asked. “Can’t see why, with her heritage or whatever.”

"I honestly don't know," Leon admitted, running a hand through his hair. He looked tired, like he'd been carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders. "I can't get a read on her - couldn't since you brought her around."

"We have to trust her," I chimed in, surprising myself with my own words.

“Wasn’t sure I believed you, but there’s your example of that right there.” Jeb huffed, pointing to me while staring Leon down. When it was clear nobody thought his joke was funny, he turned his gaze towards the cracked window, fingers drumming a steady rhythm on the arms of the chair.

The room felt stifled, as if all the air had been sucked out. The only sound I could hear was the persistent ticking of that old clock.

I broke the silence first. "We need a plan," I declared, my voice echoing in the stale air. "Can't afford to sit around doing nothing. Ben and Uncle need us.”

Jeb hummed in response - the only response I got out of either of them. I took a seat back on the mattress. Though the energy in the room was no longer as gloomy, the gravity of our situation had not changed in the slightest. I looked toward Leon and lowered my eyes. "And I mean it. Stay outta my head."

"Would if I could. You’re just a bit louder than most." Leon straightened his jacket and sat back further, letting me see his relaxed movements. But his face didn't soften, his mechanical eye remaining ever-watchful.

“If you really wanna know, I’m from Harn. Over the mountains. Had a woman. Two sons too. You'd have liked ‘em." He paused, perhaps recalling the lost times that hid behind his hardened exterior. "But all that's long gone now." He reached in his pocket and pulled out a cigarette.

Curiosity tugged at my mind like a persistent child. "How old are you?" I finally asked, unable to contain my question any longer.

Leon's response was slow and deliberate, as if he were savoring each passing minute - or maybe he knew I was going to ask and was just drawing it out for the sake of it. He met my gaze before flicking his lighter to life and taking a long drag from his cigarette, the smoke curling around his face.

"How old am I?" He echoed, squinting through the smoke. "I've been around for about 1,532 of your years, give or take a few," He nonchalantly flicked ash from his cigarette onto the worn wooden floor.

His casual response to such a staggering number left me speechless. It was hard to wrap my head around it - the sheer amount of time he'd experienced, the changes he'd seen. Or maybe he hadn’t seem many changes with being stuck in the mountains, and in a way I kind of felt bad for him for that.

"That's... a lot of years," I finally managed to say, finding my voice. He chuckled dryly in response, giving me a sidelong glance as he took another drag.

"It is," he agreed before falling silent once more. There was something tired in his eyes - well, the one - an ageless sort of weariness that made him seem far older than his appearance suggested. He stared at the smoke curling up from his cigarette for a moment before changing the subject.

"Those bastards up there, really particular about the bloodline, keeping everythin' in order. There ain't that many halfbreeds out there, so Isabella probably was of use to them just for the sake of passing on those genes. Not thirsting for blood as often, being able to be out in the sun. Whatever control she has over people and their feelings." He paused, tilting his head. He studied me curiously and looked at his fingers. "She'd've had value, though she'd always have been seen as below the rest. Victoria probably wants to use her as a vessel, a womb for her line. Gotta pass her precious gift on somehow."

"That's…" I breathed.

"Despicable," Leon spat, "I know it. A fucking crime, practically. Doesn't matter though. It's not happening. No fucking way she's taking one step closer to that girl."

I could empathize with his emotions, yet I couldn't help but question why he felt such intense anger towards Isabella but want to defend her. After all, she was involved in the death of the man he considered his father. But perhaps there was more to it than just revenge for Leon; maybe he also wanted to deny Victoria her desires. It's impossible for me to say whether this made him a better person than Isabella was turning out to be.

I could see the fervor in his eyes, the sort of fiery conviction that could either forge or destroy a man. Whatever Leon's reasons were, they were powerful enough to fuel that flame. I found myself drawn to it; strangely comforted by it in a way.

Jeb continued to gaze out the window, his silence growing more potent with each passing second. His posture told me he was far away, lost in a world of thoughts and worries that I couldn't see or understand.

Isabella's heritage was not a problem that could be simply cast aside, or at the least forgiven for, no matter how much I hated the fact. And despite what she may have hoped, her destiny was not a subject for debate. I was brought back to Leon's word, 'vessel.' If that's what she was, or even had once been, she would forever hold a target on her back, forever be hunted for the unique properties her blood gave. The concept in and of itself was frightening and new to me and yet Leon didn't bat an eyelash when describing the most awful scenario and had spoken like he knew everything about it.

"Just what kind of people are you two? To know all this?" I asked, a sudden calm flowing over me, surprising even myself.

Jeb spoke before Leon, the other man shifting slightly as he turned his gaze to his hands, saying nothing.

"The ones that stand up for the others. Ones like Leon and I, who didn't have a choice in becomin' what we are," He answered, glancing towards Leon before turning his eyes toward me. "Like you, who were pulled right smack-dab into it all and didn't stand a damn chance."

Jeb looked at me a long moment. His words carried a double meaning, a kind of remorse and pain in them as his gaze focused in on Leon once more.

My heart ached, and not knowing what to say I stayed quiet, soaking in the heaviness of the conversation. The smell of wood and smoke and a slight metallic tang filling my lungs. Something dawned upon me and my lips tugged downward a bit, noticing my brothers focus, not really meeting my eyes and how Leon wouldn't either. The same question began to loop through my mind like a broken record.

"What..." I started but a lump formed in my throat and I coughed a little. I pushed past it and went ahead and spit the words out.

"What did they do to you?" My voice wavered. "The two of you?"

Leon shifted and it was Jeb who opened his mouth first.

"They weren't good to us."

 

_________________________________________________________________________________

 

In the midst of deep sleep, I was startled awake by a noise. My eyes slowly opened, still adjusting to the grogginess of waking up. For a moment, I wondered if I was still dreaming as I stared at the ceiling. But then my brain registered that there was someone standing over me.

In a sudden burst of panic, I scrambled back. It had been the sound of footsteps that had woken me up. 

Isabella stood above me, with a half glare on her face. She looked more disheveled than usual, with her hair in a messy bun. Her careless habits seemed to be catching up to her. I rubbed my tired eyes and started to sit up.

"You scared me half to death," I murmured, my voice slurred from being abruptly awakened. "You shouldn't sneak up like that. What's wrong?"

"Just lay back down," she said sharply, with a hint of anger in her tone. Without protesting, I followed her command and laid back down on my back, looking up at her. Despite all the questions and confusion in my mind, my concern for her seemed to take precedence. If this was what she needed from me right now, then I was willing to comply. After all, my own thoughts were not completely clear either. We laid there quietly, side by side without speaking.

There was a sense of calmness radiating from her that eased the part of me that still burned. It felt reassuring, but also raw. If we didn't talk tonight, she could just wrap her arm around me, and I would allow it if she needed it right now. Just to have something else to hold on to.

It was her who initiated, reaching out first and placing her hand on top of mine. With only a brief hesitation, I slipped my palm under hers and intertwined our fingers together. Her touch was gentle yet firm.

"Eli," she said softly, almost whispering my name. Her thumb caressed the top of my hand as she held onto it tighter.

"Hmm?"

She took a deep breath before speaking again, "Why didn't you kill me or let Leon?"

 It wasn't the question I had anticipated, and for a moment I wanted to laugh at the absurdity of it all. But instead, I felt a tightness in my chest and couldn't find the words to answer right away.

Inhaling deeply, I squeezed her fingers in mine and looked over at her, trying to keep my gaze soft. There was an earnestness in her eyes, a longing for an answer. For a split second, I felt like there was no answer that could satisfy her, not for someone like her and not in this moment. However, as she raised an eyebrow and waited for my response, I gave her the truth anyway.

"Because I love you."

It was as simple as that. Amidst all the chaos and pain between us, there was still a part of her that wasn't all bad - at least that's what I saw. Maybe it was just because of my feelings for her. Or maybe she had been that person all along, with only brief moments of clarity. Perhaps those moments only held significance because of the circumstances. In some instances, I may have been completely oblivious to who she truly was. A wave of agony washed over me and I shut my eyes tightly for a moment.

But at this moment, I did truly mean it. I truly did love her, and the little glimmers that she would show through seemed worth clinging too. Worth pursuing, maybe even fighting for. But I still felt stupid for not seeing the whole truth, for thinking she was completely different. The bad certainly outweighed the good here, and yet, that still didn't change my feelings. I didn't want to be sad, I didn't want to care as deeply as I did, it hurt too damn much. I wanted to know more, but in some way I didn’t even care at all. What exactly were these feelings for?

Her hand tugged from my grip and I opened my eyes, suddenly looking over to her. She took my chin between her forefinger and thumb, holding me firmly as she brought her face closer. There was a hunger in her eyes, but there was not anger to match it. Maybe there wasn't anything, and I could barely get a read, and the anticipation was making it hard to focus. As she kissed me it took every bit of willpower I possessed to let it happen. There was no part of my brain screaming for me to run.

She drew back and she licked her lips, her teeth biting into them gently as if to savour what had transpired; she let out the statement that lingered over my face.

"You could have let him."

She said the words so easily, though her gaze had never left mine, looking for any kind of confirmation.

"He wanted me dead." She continued matter of factly, tilting her head as she regarded me with caution. "Why didn't you just say okay, let him kill me? Right then and there. We all would have been better for it."

My breathing hitched and my jaw clenched hard, taking my time to really understand what she was saying. To just let her die. She practically offered herself. Maybe in a sense it was her trying to say 'might as well end this right now' without outright saying it.

"You want to die?" I questioned, watching her. Her gaze was still gentle, watching mine, but her expression was stone, like she couldn't be bothered to try to pretend it wasn't just as it was. That this was real.

"Maybe I should."

"You really believe that." It hadn't been a question, but she didn't refute it when I spoke. Instead, a sigh escaped her lips as she seemed to hesitate to admit what she said next. 

"It was my mother's gift, my life. You can't understand what a burden that is. You will never be able to."

I snorted at that, shaking my head, remembering Leon's words about why she would be of use. I knew more now. Maybe I'd get over her fast, or slow, or never. Maybe I never wanted to be anywhere near this woman ever again. Either way I wasn't ready to tell her anything Leon told me. Not yet. Not when the weight of it all was resting so heavily on her.

"Guess so." I shot, suddenly feeling the energy drain out of me. I looked back to her and for a minute I hesitated. Then I did something I hoped I wouldn't regret. I offered her something. An olive branch, one that was given reluctantly at best, though I'd hoped not by how short the breath was.

"Come here."

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

Without question or protest, she moved to take up my offer. I stared at her, watching carefully. There was a type of sincerity that hadn't been there before.

"I never lied to you.” She said softly.

There had never been a promise for an apology either, and she left that out completely as she scooted closer and pressed her lips to mine in another kiss.

"You did." My voice sounded hoarse as my fingers went up to her cheek, running across it for a second before they settled behind her ear. I stared at her for a long few moments before she shook her head and pulled away, moving to hold onto my shirt, steadying her body before pressing herself harder against me.

"Eli." She spoke as if trying to assure herself; her lips pressed against mine. The kiss was heated, burning hot to the touch and heavy.

I allowed this moment of weakness. My chest heaved as my emotions welled up, spilling over into action. Despite this, I couldn't do it, I couldn’t hate her, and the heat spread through my stomach. Her hair was silky smooth between my fingertips as I curled a hand around the back of her head.

The kiss deepened as I clutched her to me. Though I was conflicted, there was a needy comfort, a want, no matter how misplaced and stupid. I was taking it anyway. Even if the fogginess in my brain prevented me from really thinking, I knew her lips against mine felt good. They made me forget everything and only brought to me a fleeting sense of peace.

Stupid.