“All of the recent stabbing events are too boring and unjust,” I said while gayly sipping some blehomonade. “Seriously, where is their hunter spirit?”

I sat on my throne, crossed my legs, and read the school newspaper. Another stabbing? They didn’t even have the decency to handle it with elegance. Azure went about stabbing her victims with no sense of grace or majesty. How shameful it was that she was kin—even if distant.

“Even the shitty brat, Ellie, has more flavor in her actions.” I patted the sweet little white kitten in my lap and fed him a cookie. “Isn’t that so, Aaqil?”

He purred and accepted the cookie while I scratched behind his cute ears. I took that as his agreement.

The only reason I’d been allowed such a time for rumination in the first place was that we had a day off from school. Now, usually, my grand chambers would be full of lovely servants dotting the line of carpet. However, that night had been different. The only ones to join me in the grand throne room were the kitten in my lap and the dragon sleeping soundly in the middle of the floor—those two and the three-headed dog standing at attention by the large entrance. Of course, I’d been the one to invite them here.

The hound bounded over to me, choosing to sit beside the throne. Perhaps she only wanted to listen to my silly ramblings? I mused.

I handed her a bone, and she barked. Hound wagged her tail.

“Good doggy.”

Such divine fluff was at odds with her hellish nature, like an oxymoron. Though speaking of morons, there had been plenty at school. The first one that came to mind was the question mark who sat in the same row.

“Seriously, what’s his deal, companion?” I asked the sleeping dragon. “Always trying to bully poor little me.”

Prince huffed—two large streams of smoke coming from his nose—and raised his head. A rumbling in the room accompanied the action. Very characteristic of his giant form.

I slumped in my seat and sighed as he yawned, hoping he wouldn’t remove the ceiling again.

“What’s wrong, companion?” He asked, and the deep, encompassing voice echoed.

“What’s wrong is that you removed the roof last time you were here! Or did you forget?” I asked.

“Isn’t it better now? You should have just left the roof off, so I can fly in here anytime.”

“No, no, no. Did you forget that I hate the sun? If you removed this room’s ceiling, the daytime would be bad for my skin.”

“The light purges all impurities, companion!” Prince smiled, but I could only hold my head.

This dragon only knew how to purge and bask people in holy light. However, both would be the opposite of good for my skin. Even looking at his holy figure radiating warmth sometimes made me feel queasy. It was even worse when I stared at the halo that often appeared above the dragon’s head.

“It doesn’t matter anyway,” I said. “I wasn’t even thinking about the roof until you awoke. Afraid that your head might send it careening into some poor vampires below.”

“My head is not even that big!”

Even Hound had to laugh awkwardly at that.

“The point is—” I continued to idly stroke the cat in my lap and the Hound at my side. “I only invited you here today to gossip about our classmates.”

“We shall do no such thing!”

“Booooring~”

Prince pouted, releasing another double jet of steam from his nostrils. “They are all precious members of my hoard. Not some rabble to be ill-spoken of.”

“Yes, yes. We are all members of your hoard. Isn’t that right, Hound?” I asked and presented her with another bone.

“Woof!”

“Good girl.” I scratched under her chin—chins.

She released an infernal growl as one of the heads snapped the bone in half, leaving charring along it.

“Fine, fine.” I turned back to my companion. “We will have it your way, so what do you suppose we do to take advantage of this free time?”

“How about we talk about how great the other hoard members are instead?”

“Bleh!” I slumped on my throne and turned so my feet dangled from the armrest.

It was Prince’s turn to release a deep sigh. “Aren’t you supposed to be a queen? Is this really how you are going to present yourself.”

“Bleh, bleh, bleh,” I said, covering my ears. “I don’t want to hear it from the greedy dragon, who, until now, was sleeping like a baby.”

I looked up to see a faint crimson painting his scaly cheeks. “I was doing no such thing!”

Hound barked and bit at a bat that flew in from the window.

As the bat landed on my arm, I threw another bone for Hound to fetch. I carefully unrolled the message the bat had brought with it.

“Seems we are out of time anyway.”

ScribbleHubWorks

No bats were harmed while making this chapter. Anyone angry should take it up with my subordinates.

This chapter was written by Envy!