Chapter Theme Music: Lycanthia ~ Ordo Funebris
<07/18/145,838 {Avion 144} - 16:40 | Corral Position, Genosis, Altiri Sector Space>
<Karnak to ACS414 Date Equivalent: 07/18/-1718>
I wish I could be more certain about every choice I make in my life. How different would things turn out if I had the ability to redo something I question or regret? Why must every turning point in time beseech so much anxiety? We're always afraid that our actions may one day prove to be one colossal mistake which can never be undone or rectified.
With or without this power, so long as we still learn from our mistakes, we can confidently take pride in our growth. However, we're all still learning so much. None of us will be certain anytime soon if our interference in the human world will lead to despair and woe. It may turn out that we shall never be certain of such choices.
"Calibrations complete. That's all for now." Junko turned her head slightly to meet mine, while I had my focused view straight through the forward cockpit window of our starship, displaying the vast skybox of outer space blended with the hint of blue between the distant stars. "Anyone home?"
"I heard you." My mind has been so active lately, confused and centered on every aspect of our two worlds. Before I realized it, a full, long-term montrum enveloped the corners of my passive imagination. I was constantly wondering about our future, rather than the mere detail of our shared existence. The Altiri world and the Human world are no longer as separate as they used to be, our involvement certain in a recent announcement by the queen and her Royal Scryers. It was a decision I thought they would never-ever make... And yet, I don't feel all that upset about the news, perhaps because too much time has passed since, or perhaps because I stopped caring about the benevolent direction of ACS414.
I wasn't ignoring Junko; I was simply keeping my mind busy. The frequent manual calibrations we must input into the navigation program is one of many to crux our daily operations, a necessary process to ensure the AGCR systems are handling their task amidst the constant output of external gravitational flux between Karnak and our star. With it complete, we can ignore any further input for several hours, doing nothing but thinking or talking, or something else...
"Still thinking about ACS414?" Junko knows already it's more than that. She already dedicated some time recently to check in with Earth using her long range clairvoyance, as have I. Not too much has changed in their world over the thousands of years, except for the fact that local colonies continue to branch and spread outward, increasing our visual range of what our psionic eyes can see.
"I'm wondering why they're planning to initiate first contact with humans." It's news everybody knows about, including those on the surface of Karnak. Despite all previous concerns, the royal team finally lifted the no-contact protocol, under very specific and complex circumstances of course.
Much of this must have been influenced by the slow and gradual evolution of human behavior. They gradually grow more intelligent through further generations of birth, and long after the ice age era of their world, the humans have continued to adapt and expand beyond their original position of their initial spawn of existence, wherever that may be. We've been capable of observing more colonies and more locations including amazing scenery as a result, but that isn't the only thing that has changed in human society.
Many thought the Earth would have a short finite number of days to remain peaceful, myself included. However, we instead realized that through a lack of global unity, technology, and fettered lifespans, it's presently too difficult for the heathens of that world to take control of any large groups for conquer and world domination, at least for now. When their society reaches a higher state of development and unity, this will certainly change.
I can't fathom the reason why anyone would want to make contact with these aliens when our worlds are so far apart, when we are so separate and different. In fact, I never thought it was possible, given their lack of psionic abilities present throughout their race. Apparently, this experimental process called the purge has the ability to construct a psionic bridge between two people across the vast distance of the universe. Nothing is certain yet, but I know Herios must have been one incredible genius for coming up with such an involved process. Sometimes I wonder if she could see this far ahead in time, and if she could also see how this all ends.
Bored of my vocal silence between us, Junko delivered her opinion on the matter. "I think it's because, we've stopped looking at the human race as a collective species, and instead focused more on individual units in their world. Their colonies are so separate even now, enough that some of them are living in entirely different worlds and circumstances from each other."
"I don't see why that would motivate the decision to get directly involved."
"It's the idea of individualism. The humans are not a hive mind species, and so even if a majority of them are tainted, there are many other single humans who have better morals and ethics. If such people do exist, then the motivation for contact wouldn't be through some random human ambassador or disciple; rather, it would be targeted to those specific individuals."
"But what if word gets out? What if a single purge changes too much too fast? I could care less if the heathens are disturbed by our presence, but if there are more innocent people in that world, wouldn't our interference bring more problems than it aims to solve?"
"It sounds more like you're scared of what could happen, rather than what is more likely to happen."
I'm more amazed Junko doesn't see this as such a big issue. Ever since the announcement, those other aggressor groups I once championed for haven't raised as much resistance to the idea like I thought they would. All this time, what have I been trying to do? What have I been accomplishing in all of this mess?
"But there's something you're forgetting as well. Even as we speak, the queen is trying to decide exactly who and how the first purge will be used. Just because a purge is authorized doesn't mean everybody will jump at the chance to try it. It actually isn't allowed by anyone who isn't in the Altiri military, and then we would still need permission from the queen with details of our intended target, as well as lots of preparation and dedication since it somehow affects the entire team instead of the leading node. It may sound like everything is being decided right now, but I think the scryers won't really do anything for a very long time."
"Okay," I reminded. "And what if you're wrong?"
I saw Junko open her jaw as she was about to answer, when she was interrupted by a series of abrupt pings or beeps to the small monitor in front of the chair she was sitting in. The noise and protocol was of course highly unusual to us both, so she shifted priority. "Looks like we'll have to pause this conversation. This is a level three alert."
"What is it?" I knew I could only wait in curiosity, since the blip only appeared on Junko's monitor. With only seconds of typing commands, Junko quickly identified the issue.
"The condenser in our rear cargo room is being overworked. There's another level one alert from the condenser in the dark matter reactor room. We'll have to check it out."
"Understood." Rare as this is, I can't say I'm surprised. There are only five possible alert levels for system warnings, with level five being the highest. If one of the many condensers routed in the cargo room is causing problems, we'll have to ensure nothing is out of place in that area, before shutting it down if we have to. Equipment malfunctions do happen in a spacecraft as large as this one. Everything runs really well and for such a long time, but when I'm alive for as long as I am, it still feels like this is a routine occurrence. "I'll follow you to the cargo room then."
In agreement, Junko nodded after standing up from her seat for me to follow. I wanted to keep our previous conversation going, for the sake of so many questions still left unanswered, but our current situation requires too much focus for leisurely conversation. One can never get too distracted when piloting a spaceship, or investigating it for any problems.
Once we reached the furthest reaches of the massive cargo room, Junko and I were both facing up towards the corner of the metal ceiling, in the place we knew the condenser to be.
"I don't see any leaks, dents, or signs of exterior issues. Looks like I'm going to have to shut that unit down for now. We can pilot the starship into the temple hangar later." After Junko's brief inspection, I was calm enough to relax. As it sounded, this was all routine. Parts simply breakdown over time, and the only useful mechanics are onboard the Altiri Temple.
I was just about to revel in our continued safety, when the sound of an aft explosion, muffled by many meters of hull shot both of us awake. Before we could react to the distant blast somewhere inside of the ship, the emergency sirens blasted through the networked speaker system, sounding a global level five alarm. "What was that?!"
Chapter Theme Shift: This Armour ~ Halo 4 OST
Junko glared back at me with more fear in her eyes than I'd ever recall seeing before, and I could only share in the same reaction. Despite what I mentioned earlier, this was anything but routine! "We need to get back to the cockpit, now!"
I'm not about to question my second in command, for I know she will figure out the problem before I can, since she's seen more of the system's logs today than I have. Without delay, Junko and I sprinted out of the cargo room, through the halls, into the main room, and finally the cockpit area again. We ran as fast as we could manage, slow enough not to slam into walls, given our top speed on foot can be above 260 miles per hour. Once back into the cockpit, Junko sat down and mashed that keyboard like a lunatic! I'm amazed she didn't enter any mistyped characters in our shared panic.
The constant blaring alarm and sirens didn't allow me to relax, but I knew it was better to be awake and alert for a sudden emergency situation. Whatever is wrong with the ship can lead to a deadly situation if we don't act swiftly and intelligently.
"Found it!" Junko continued typing keys as she reported the problem to me, correcting her previous error in judgment.
"Update me!"
"Looks like the cargo bay condenser wasn't the problem, only a symptom. That explosion we just heard? That's what used to be the secondary reactor condenser."
"Used to be?!" Those condensers are designed to last for thousands of years without maintenance, but this is the first time I've ever had one explode!
"The A/C system is struggling to keep up with the sudden change, and it's bringing down condenser number three as a result."
"Can we stop it from wrecking the entire system?"
"Lumina! Get in your seat and help me isolate the Freon flow to critical areas."
"On it." There isn't any time to lose. I still don't know exactly what happened, but it looks like the A/C system will be in trouble if we don't act fast.
"Reactor temperature is normal. We can ignore any power fluctuation changes." Like me, Junko switched from her physical voice to her telepathic voice, allocating more of her energy to her hand movements, while I did the same.
Her update was one upside to this emergency. Energy reactor meltdowns are not pretty, and they can be impossibly intense coming from dark matter containment. Not one minute passed with such intense nervousness, when I finally executed all the terminal commands I needed to. "Done! Airflow has been rerouted!"
As soon as I did this, the sirens ceased, filling the space with a silent calm, all for but two entire seconds. Before we could calmly celebrate, the alarms reactivated again, this time with multiple level five alarms, some hitting my terminal while the rest hit Junko's.
"What now Junko?"
"I'm looking! Don't rush me too much!"
I knew I would need to give Junko more time, but with the alarms going off again, this proved to us both how serious our situation was. Since we had also been using telepathy long enough, one of our sisters caught wind of this lively moment as well.
"Sherika here. Is something going on down there?"
With Junko as busy as she was, I took over the brief disruption of our focused efforts. "We have to concentrate on the crisis Sherika. We're declaring a level two emergency. Keep your teleporters ready in case we need to evacuate the ship."
"Understood." Sherika left with absolution in her voice, rising to the crisis as much as we had. I've never had to abandon ship before, but today might be that kind of day.
Huffing after finding the issue at last, Junko updated us once more. "This is bad. The stress in the system had been accumulating earlier, so now the Air Conditioner doesn't have enough juice to cool the entire ship to its effective minimum!"
I understood every unspoken detail behind her worry. Our starship has over a dozen condensers all working together, reducing the stress and load of the primary air conditioner unit. The life support system pumping breathable air into our hull has no bearing on the situation. The problem is the reactor room. The internal reactor is working just fine, but the external air around that same reactor is quickly heating up from the loss of the main condenser in that specific room, despite cool air from other places venting into the zone. If we shut off airflow to the reactor room, then it will become too hot for normal operations. If we shut off the reactor itself, we won't have power for very long. With two condensers already out of the picture, the increased stress will add to the remaining condensers, leading to the possibility of a catastrophic chain reaction, potentially followed by a meltdown afterwards. "But I already rerouted the Freon flow away from non-critical areas. Is it still not enough?"
A new alert pinged in front of Junko and myself, reporting of critical alterations in probe values. This was already going from bad to worse. "Looks like your solution isn't going to save us. The air temperature inside the cargo room is rising! Lumina! Shut off the airflow to both our rooms, but keep the A/C running to the rest."
"Executing!" With no time to waste on thought, I entered the commands I needed to, finally understanding how bad this was about to get. It only took me six seconds, and when I was finished, all airflow to the cockpit and the main room were shut off. That means life support isn't on for both of these areas, but I wasn't finished yet. Even if Junko doesn't state the command, all pilots know what additional actions must be taken afterwards. Even a scary situation like this is drilled into our training. "I'm isolating condenser seven so that it only spits out airflow to the cockpit." It won't last forever, but it is still a good way to buy more time if we become trapped in here. Right now, I'm more worried about the escaped heat leaking into and then out from the cargo room.
"Your executions are confirmed. Cargo room is still rising, with some areas already reaching sixty-nine degrees Nixus!"
My whole body trembled with a twitch of fear knowing where that was. Most of the rooms inside this ship are not isolated with sealable doors, so that air will slither and sink until it reaches us. I can't blame myself for trembling; any Altiri would panic if warm air gets anywhere near their body. The effect warmth above 50 degrees has on our bodies is toxic, the result always fatal. At sixty nine and higher, any form of inhalation will trigger nerve failure, while our internal organs begin to liquefy. If that warm air reaches the cockpit without cooling back down first, both of us are dead. "Can we stop it?"
"Negative. The stress on the A/C isn't easing up. Had it been any other two condensers, we would have been fine. We need to dock with the temple for emergency repairs, or abandon ship. Now it's your call Lumina."
Junko gave me such a strong stare, certifying that as leader and primary pilot, I would have to make the next call on how to proceed. Learning more information is always a priority before taking action. "Keep monitoring the temperature. I have to check and see if our current power output will allow for teleportation." Warping off the ship will be easier, but it means sacrificing the entire starship, permanently so. If we can't fix the problem before we can dock, and there is nobody to periodically calibrate the AGCR, this ship will eventually plummet into the ice of the planet below, pulled in by its external gravity. That is still preferable to us dying, but if the reactor is being overdrawn by the crisis, it means the teleporters won't have enough power for more than a single warp, assuming there would be enough for one. Even if there was enough power, it also takes time and calibration to configure those teleporters to the chambers of any other nearby ship, time we might not even have. In either decision, we can't waste any time, so I must first confirm if there is enough time to get the hell out of here.
Meanwhile, Junko will continue monitoring the probes and echo back any alarming results to me. "The A/C is keeping the air from rising above seventy Nixus, but that warmer air is already spreading to the rest of the ship through diffusion. It's already going to hit the main halls in about two minutes or less."
The main halls connect several long corridors to other parts of the ship, but they also connect to the main room, which is the large room that sits right through the opening of our cockpit, a cockpit without any kinds of doors. If the heated air reaches the main room, well, that's where the teleportation machines are stationed.
"Keep monitoring..." It took more time than I wanted to, but I was able to confirm what I needed to. Strangely, the reactor was doing just fine on power output. Good news one out of two would be passed because of this. Now we have to address the other problem. "Junko? How long until the heat breaches the main room?"
"We've got nine minutes. If it seeps into the main room, we'll take the hit at about the same time, due to our position." That means, ten minutes tops if we're in the cockpit, and eleven minutes if we're directly in front of the teleporters. It takes just under five minutes to configure a teleportation chamber... Wouldn't leave us with much time at all, and Junko is only guessing with her timed prediction. If she's too generous, deciding to warp out will kill us both...
"Your orders Lumina!"
I know! I have to make a tough decision right now. If we instead abandon the idea of the teleporters and try to fly directly to the Altiri Temple, we could make it in about 110 minutes on maximum thrust controls. In addition to that, there will be plenty of cool air re-entering this room from the vent I rerouted, and several bottles of pure water stored in the overhead cabinets. Either choice is a risk, and I have to buy more time in either scenario. "Alright! Prepare the ion thrusters for max acceleration. Course should be locked for the Altiri Temple docking bay. I'll let everyone know what's going on while you get to it."
Junko didn't argue or point out to me that either decision would have its risks. We both know about them, including all of the dangers of operating in outer space. We're both putting on a brave act right now, but high thermal energy is more terrifying than anything I could imagine.
Ever since Herios invented the wondrous resurrection machine, we've been able to use it frequently to bring ourselves back to life if something befalls us, so long as the body does not suffer damage too severe and significant. Most causes of death are ignorable with that awesome machine, but it isn't foolproof. Just because we can live forever doesn't mean we always will... That building heat coming to get us will turn us into literal puddles of melting flesh. No machine in the world can restore us from that fate. This isn't like other situations where someone is in danger with a chance of resurrection. If we die from this, it will be a permanent death.
Of course, running out of breathable air is something we can come back from, and it's a possible scenario since the workers at the temple will need to vent our air to cool off this bucket. I'd rather suffocate and die than burn alive from the inside. Humans can seemingly tolerate lots of heat, but for us, sixty-nine degree air has the same effect as lighting our body on fire from the inside.
"This is Lumina to all other Cy-Stars! We're declaring a level five emergency! We will be docking with the temple as soon as we can, in order to avert the crisis. If you follow us, dock in a place with plenty of distance to our ending point."
"... We will, but what exactly is wrong with your ship?"
"Maybe she's trying to warn us that they might explode after docking, and that we shouldn't get too close."
"Hurma! Now is no time for those dark conclusions! Let's follow them in. They may need our help warping out."
"Negative," I repeated. "Warping out isn't going to be an option for us this time." Especially not right now. The single minute we just spent on this decision has already locked us out of the possibility of warping off this ship before the fiery air breaches the same room. "You mustn't attempt manual docking either, since the air in that zone will be contaminated."
"Thermal air contamination? That's really serious Lumina!" Derria knew as much as we did, but as they already knew what they needed to, it was now time to inform the others.
"This is Lumina from Cy-Stars to anyone at the Altiri Temple. We need to make an emergency docking! Reason: thermal air contamination! Please confirm all preparations will be made."
"This is Royal Scryers Ethsia. We hear you! The queen has already become aware of your situation, but it sounds like it will still take you some time to arrival. Keep in mind Lumina, we may have to vent the entire hangar, and your air supply with it."
"That's fine. We'd rather suffocate than burn."
"Understood."
I should have known the queen was listening in... She probably only began doing so after sensing our serious panic and fear from what was going on after long enough. Even if others have no access to our minds, if we have a strong enough emotional experience, it can leak out everywhere, as this is the nature of Though Dynamics.
"This is your great queen speaking. Lumina? Junko? I'm here to help you out as well. Is there any assistance that you need where it involves information about emergency protocols?"
"There isn't. We may be able to salvage this entire mess, but there isn't any other option we can take in the meantime. I have to go." Cutting off my link with the queen, I gave my focus where it was needed, as Junko was trying to get my attention.
"Lumina? What are we supposed to do about the thermal contamination? It's already starting to seep into the main room!" She didn't wait to tell me that; it was something she learned as she was speaking to me.
"It's already here?! Help me Junko!" I jumped out of my seat facing the arched door as if it were a powerful adversary, though I dared not step one foot forward.
"Help you do what? It will take us hours to reach the temple! Our cockpit doesn't have any door to seal that heat off!"
"I know, so we have to make one."
"Uh?" Junko didn't seem to catch on to my plan until I finally started to charge what energy I could.
Both my hands were already tingling, while the color of my eyes started to glow brightly. All of us Altiri have one more special ability, one that is almost magical in nature, though it is purely natural and scientific. Remembering all I could about flash-condensation, I took aim with both my hands, sensing Junko was now preparing to do the same, realizing my idea. "We'll seal the door with ice!"
As soon as I was ready to, I let all of that building energy out, flashing two solid beams of freezing water from my hands, all while waving them in certain directions to create a bit of a spiraling motion, just as Junko did the same. The quick high-pitch zap of the ice beams was painful to our ears, but the evanescent beams of negative-thermal energy and water expulsion did what we needed it to do, creating a powerful and thick makeshift wall of ice, fully blocking every crevice of space between that opened doorway and this cockpit room.
Before I could even celebrate the amazing display we just put on, I already found myself sinking to the floor pretty hard. Trying not to pass out after shooting beams of ice is a challenge, but I'll recover just enough energy to get myself more water to drink. I won't be able to use that trick again for all of today, but that thick wall of ice should hold back against all of that warm air on the other side, hopefully for as long as it takes us to safely land in the temple.
Yes, blasting a forward area with a beam of ice is possible; no magic or unknown voodoo necessary. It's actually a variant of our lost ancient ability to melt frozen water with our hands. With practice, we can create intense and powerful air vibrations through the pours in our hands, and direct that force inwards, so that the air in front of us combined with expulsion of melted water from the pours in our palms solidifies and condensates in a mere flash of an instant. Ice is simply another form of air and water, and we have the power to bend it to this purpose, even though it takes so much of the water inside of us to do this.
"Did it work?"
At last, I could give Junko a smile of solace. I could tell from here that the wall would hold for more than two hours. The room outside will heat to about seventy degrees Nixus (75 degrees Fahrenheit), but with the power and A/C system still running, and the isolated setting of ventilation I have for the cockpit room, this space will stay right around -70 Nixus. Because of this, the ice won't melt as easily. "It worked Junko. Let's drink water before we fall out."
Storing ample supply of water bottles in our cockpit room is mandatory, mostly for emergency situations like this. Junko and I had no problem replenishing ourselves, and I had to calm my sisters following from their ships, worried about the both of us.
"That was some smart thinking on your part." Junko knew I wasn't too much into receiving praise, but I couldn't blame her given how bad things got a second ago.
"It was the best possible option." This entire situation could have been controlled if only each room had some kind of strongly sealed doors in place we could control.
Of course, I knew of the reason why the designers to date are still refusing to have these doors installed and implemented. The biggest problem to that idea is our dwindling supply of physical resources. It was a miracle a fleet as big as our military could be built from all the metal and other elements found in lurking asteroids and fragments of Zinod's debris. There is enough to put doors in every ship, but it would drain the supply so much, general maintenance would suffer.
Not to mention, doors involve moving parts, especially when they have to be capable of sealing all air off between rooms. Moving parts in physical or mechanical machinery always fail before anything else, in our experience anyway. Between all the motors and electronic circuitry remaining in the rationed supplies, much of that would vanish as well. Doors are more of a liability than any assistance in most internal starship emergencies. It's for this reason no ship really has them, at least between the cockpit room, the main room, and the teleportation area.
"Come to think of it," I realized, "we should have simply cut all power and vented the reactor room as soon as we understood the problem." There was a third option after all, and none of us thought of it in time. Venting individual rooms of all air into space is something we can do from here. Had we done that to the reactor room only, all air inflow from that passing point would not drag the heat all around the ventilation of the A/C system as it was doing now. In fact, it may still be a possibility.
"No, you're forgetting that we would have to be much faster for something like that to work. It's true that the one condenser that blew was the most important one, but we would have to first confirm a lack of any breaches before venting the room. Plus, for all we know, the explosion could have damaged any one of the ventilation intakes inside. If it has, then such action would have affected other areas as well while starving the A/C system entirely, and our life support with it." Junko didn't include that every room of the ship can last with days of air without life support, but I understood her evaluation well enough. I can't believe my last-minute decision was the right call.
Chapter Theme Shift: Inertia ~ Carbon Based Lifeforms
By now, Junko and I were back in our seats at the controls, taking full control over the manual navigation to reach the temple... An eerie silence filled the space, silence that proved all was well, though it put me on edge. "This is good. Looks like we'll make it... Just keep using telepathy though. I don't want to even chance running out of air from speaking too much."
"The life support is still on. We shouldn't run out of..."
"Figure it out yet?" I know she has. I order to give us any air at all, I had to basically change the airflow from condenser 7 to intake already cool air and spit out what we're getting now. The problem is, with the current configuration, it's only getting this air from the two rooms we isolated and shielded from this wrath of warmth. We're not using the life support normally or as intended, so even with it running, our time against suffocation is about the same time it will take us to dock. If I want to add anymore air to our supply, it will only come from the contamination outside, killing us instantly. It's also the reason condenser 7 isn't being stressed to handle this; since it isn't drawing any contaminated air.
"Right. I forgot."
"We'll be okay. This might be the worst crisis I've ever faced on a ship, but we did the best we could. We have to land and leave it up to the others afterwards." It's still a scary thought. There's a chance of us both dying today from suffocation. I've died and come back to life more times than I can remember counting, my damaged body restored every time. If it happens again, all that will happen is a figurative reset of my age, as is custom here, plus losing the last four months of my memories. Good riddance to this day if that does happen.
Though it took a few more minutes and silent effort, Junko managed to relax herself again, matching the calm I've since achieved. "Yeah, we'll be alright then, thanks to both of us."
"You did just as well as I did. You're getting faster on that terminal than I am somehow."
"I have to, since you seem to like spending so much time thinking off alone that I simply inherit the job more often."
"I feel bad about that. I'll make sure I take more of the workload if that's really the case."
"No, I insist you keep doing what you've been doing. I don't want to make you do the calibrations if you don't want to."
"I said it's fine. Don't worry about it Junko."
"... It's a wonder that you're so calm right now. My arms are still shaking a little."
I didn't realize until now that Junko was so freaked out by what happened. "It's okay Junko. Besides, I might be calm, but that doesn't mean I'm not upset." Keeping calm is only a means to avoid freaking out; it doesn't quell the disturbances in our heart.
"Upset?" I imagined Junko would only be unable to sense how I feel right now due to both our anxieties, overshadowing everything else. "What for? We made it. You don't mean the designer, do you? We had maintenance recently; and I don't think they could have caught this before it happened."
"I'm not upset at anybody Junko... Except maybe myself."
"You and I both just saved our own lives, at least for now. I don't understand you."
"It goes back to our conversation earlier."
"Huh?"
"You might have forgotten, said you would pause the conversation, but I can't make myself forget about that stuff."
"If you're still so hung up on the thought of contact with other aliens, I'm sure the queen will really hear you out if you speak your mind."
"I'm sure she would, but that's not really the issue anymore." Junko might not realize it, but after today...
"Lumina...?"
She was only interested in me now because of the tears I couldn't hold back. I might be calm, my expression may be unchanged, but now I know for certain I was wrong. "After today, I realize the reason some of those humans behave as irrationally as they do. None of them are perfect, most of them far from it. Every single day they are alive, they have to face another side of the world they don't want to, that which haunts the depths of every mind; expiration of us all."
Junko allowed me to cry my truth from within, giving us time to process the weight of all I've learned.
"We almost died today Junko, not in any way we ever have before, but a death that we would have never come back from. It's rare for that to happen to us the way we age, but every human on that planet has such short life spans and further dangers, they have to come face to face with that every moment they are awake. So I have to wonder, even if we can be calm in a crisis like this, are we really any braver than they are?"
"I don't get what you're trying to say. Are you upset because you should have been braver than you already were?"
"Mhmn," I nodded. "I'm upset because I'm too cautious about them. I'm too worried about something I can never control. It's not that I want to avoid communication with humans because I hate them. I don't want any of us to ever make a mistake where our actions hurt the feelings of a human who we might one day grow to care for. You know as well as I do that any scryer who targets a human for purge will only target the hidden gems of people, the insightful, the sensitive. Even if I'm not the one to take the action, I along with everybody else here are representatives of The Unity."
"You're saying, you don't want to hurt anybody who is innocent, psychologically that is?"
"Yes... However, I've realized that if we communicate with anybody, hurting that other person, even unintentionally is unavoidable. The wonder we share with others in mutual awareness, drives us with wonderful purpose, and hurts us with inevitable absence, in break or in parting from this world."
"Hm..." Though it amazed me just a little that Junko didn't understand me, I was sure she would, in time.
"I've been looking at everything the wrong way. If even we, Altiri who never age, are still so capable of sudden and abrupt demise, then even we are subject to the same principles of our struggle against mortality, something that is always inevitable. Therefore, in concern for how I feel towards that other world, it shouldn't be about what we stand to lose, gain, or fear. If we make contact with the human world, we will help them, and we will hurt them. We will likely hurt ourselves, but everyone involved will learn from this. In going through with the purge, Altiri and Humans can learn and experience new things together."
"Does that mean, you're suddenly all for the purge?"
"Don't get me wrong. I intend on purging nobody. I keep hearing horror stories and rumors about the price to be paid for enacting such a strong covenant, and unless every single one of us has a unison agreement to use one, I will never force any to take part in it. Where it concerns our continued clairvoyant surveillance on the other hand, I insist that we focus our efforts more than ever before, so that we can learn with greater density, just how deep Human souls really are."
"So then, we'll be watching the world more closely."
"Only if you want. Even clairvoyant scanning is optional for all of us. I'll never force or encourage anyone to do something they don't need to do. As for me, I'm going to keep watching them, until I arrive at an answer which satisfies me. I'm also going to keep my eyes on the actions taken by the Royal Scryers. If they really think purging those people is a good idea, I'll learn from their actions, rather than stand in their way and thwart our shared knowledge."
"Not too long ago, you said the exact opposite if I recall."
"The Human race is going to perish one day anyway, as are we for that matter. I say, if we're all going to die together, we should try to learn together as well, even if there is no significant end goal."
"You really are something Lumina. I'm sure our sisters have already heard all of that."
From there, Rose let us both know that Junko's suspicion was on point. "You two just worry about getting to the station. Remember to breathe slowly if your air gets thin."
"Of course they heard all of what I said. I'm counting on it." Rose, Sherika, Derria, Fionne, Talor, Hurma, Ashiela, Luna, and Lulu; all of you are in charge of remembering what I've just learned, if I don't make it out on the other side. Four months of memory loss might not be much to most people, but if I forget the sentiment in what I've now come to realize, I'll never forgive myself.
"We're still about fifty-five minutes away," Junko reminded. "It's going to be interesting once we arrive."
"It's nice, quiet, and cold in here." The sizzling chill of the air from our A/C vent was so soothing, so relaxing. I feel like I could shut my eyes and meditate here forever. Maybe the air is already getting low. Maybe I'm not going to make it beyond this moment. As long as I have my sisters, and my super-cooled air, I'll always feel so serene and at home.
"Okay then... You take a moment to relax, and I'll fly the ship."
Junko actually seems worried. After everything I just said, it would be a shame if I were to permanently perish before I could enact the symphonies in my heart. But, it wouldn't be too bad. Better it is, for my soul to reawaken and shine before my end, than it would be for me to die asleep, mute and isolated from all the possibilities and wonders of our universe. So long as I am awake when I die, I won't ever reflect back to regrets. My body may be a temporary vessel, but my consciousness, my truth, all in essence that I am, is invulnerable.
