Icarus picked up his bag and slung it over his shoulders, buckling it in the front and making sure it was on right before he headed for the doors of the bus. His stuff had been left alone, and he was grateful for that. Now, he just needed to get his motorcycle and leave. He didn’t want to go to the Association, but he had no choice. He needed to get his level measured.

His phone vibrated with a message, and he pulled it out.

Jacinto: Want me to meet you at the Association?

Icarus: Please.

Thank gods he didn’t have to go alone. That would be a problem. He did not want to go on his own. With a sigh, he swung onto his motorcycle and settled his helmet on his head. He put in the key and revved it up, and then he peeled out of the parking lot, looking left and right before he headed out onto the street. His motorcycle vibrated under his thighs as he kicked it up to third gear, and he headed out, the wind blowing around him. It was a short drive from the Highlight Guild to the Association, so he would make it there in time.

He pulled to a stop at a red light and checked his phone as kpop played over the speakers of his phone. The bone conduction headphones were wrapped around his ears, and he settled back in his seat as he checked his messages with Aiden. There was a very long voice note, and he didn’t want to listen to it yet. He didn’t want to hear his excuses.

With a sigh, he locked his phone and slid it back in his pocket, and then he looked over. There was a group of girls in the car next to him, and they were all staring at him. He tilted his head, and then the light turned green. He took off, and the car rolled alongside him as the girls continued staring at him. What was that about? He looked forward, and revving his engine and peeling ahead of them, and they watched him go as he flicked on his blinker and got in the turn lane.

He rested his motorcycle on one leg, watching the traffic, and when the light turned yellow, he cruised across the intersection and headed for the Association headquarters. He could see the skyscraper from here, shining in the Arizona sun, and he wove in and out of the traffic to make it there in time. It would be opening soon, and he needed to get in line to get tested. There was going to be a long line, and he knew that, but he didn’t want to deal with it. He should be picking right now. He couldn’t afford to take a day off.

The sunflower amigurumi and mushroom amigurumi were in his pockets, and he checked to make sure they hadn’t fallen out. They hadn’t, and he pulled into the parking lot in front of the Association and cut the engine, kicking out the kickstand and leaning his motorcycle over. He swung off of it, and looked up at the building. It was a simple test. He didn’t have to do anything. Just had to put his hand on the level stone and let it read out his rank. It was simple. Then, he could just go home and crochet some more amigurumi.

There was a line out front, and he went to join it, looking around for Jacinto. He didn’t live far from the Association, so he was probably here already. Icarus pulled off his helmet and stuffed it under his arm before he joined the ranks waiting for the Association to open at eight am on the dot, and checked the time. It was currently 7:30am, and there were thirty or so people out here. There would be more people showing up soon, and he hoped no one threw a fit about Jacinto ‘cutting’ in line. He was here for support.

“There you are!” Jacinto called, and Icarus looked up. Jacinto was approaching him, in a t-shirt and jeans, and Icarus waved at him.

“Hi,” he said, and Jacinto joined him in line.

“Nervous?” he asked, and Icarus bit his bottom lip.

“Yeah,” he replied, and Jacinto nodded a few times.

“I’ll be right here with you,” he promised, and someone snapped a photo of Icarus. What? The girl turned aside, typing on her phone, and Icarus looked down at his phone. The voice note was still there, sitting pretty, and he needed to listen to it. Aiden sent it at two am, long after Icarus passed out, and Icarus didn’t…

He didn’t want to deal with it. He did not want to deal with it. He would rather pretend it wasn’t happening at all. Aiden could beg for forgiveness all he wanted, but Icarus wasn’t going to entertain it. He was mad at him, and he wasn’t forgiving him anytime soon.

“Why are people taking photos of me?” Icarus whispered to Jacinto, and Jacinto gave him a weird look.

“Well, you’re in the news,” he replied, and Icarus blinked. “And all over social media.”

“I’m… What?” Icarus asked, and Jacinto stared at him.

“Did you… not know?” he asked, and Icarus paled.

“I haven’t opened Twitter in six months,” he said, and Jacinto stared at him some more.

“Well, you’re on it,” he said. “And all over TikTok.”

“TikTok?” Icarus asked, his voice cracking as it rose to a shout, and oh, that was gratifying. His voice was cracking. That was very gratifying.

“Yeah? You were in a live stream with, like, 50,000 people watching,” Jacinto said. “Of course you’re all over TikTok.”

“This is bad!” Icarus hissed. “This is very, very bad!”

“Well, you’re probably S-ranked now, so it’s normal,” Jacinto said with a shrug. “You’re going to have to deal with it, I dunno what to tell you.”

“What? No, I don’t have to deal with it!” Icarus protested, and Jacinto stared at him.

“What, you think you can keep your head down like Aiden? Look how long that lasted, and you need to pay for top surgery,” he said, and Icarus blinked. “This is your best bet to get an insurance that covers it. And you won’t have to pay for T out of pocket anymore.”

Icarus stood there for a moment, not sure of what to say, and looked down at the voice note on his phone. He should listen to that. Hear Aiden out. It was a very long voice note. He didn’t… He didn’t…

He didn’t want to do this, he realized. He didn’t want to do any of this. Why did he just… Why was his life like this? He was going to be a celebrity overnight, and he was scared. He was very scared. The world was suddenly a lot bigger, and he was suddenly a lot smaller. He felt vulnerable. He did not like feeling vulnerable.

He locked his phone and slipped it back into his pocket, and then he let his head thump on Jacinto’s shoulder.

“This is hell,” he muttered, and Jacinto patted him on the head.

“You’ll be alright,” he murmured, and no. No, Icarus was not going to be okay. He was not going to be okay at all. He felt like he was spiraling.

Did he really have to wait till 8am while all of these people were taking photos of him? He didn’t want to wait until eight am. Someone else snapped a photo of him leaning on Jacinto like this, and he twitched. He didn’t like that. He probably was never going to get any privacy. And it was probably all over the news that he was trans. He didn’t like that. There was only one trans S-rank that was out in the US, and that was Ember August, the very support that stood next to Aiden.

He thought about Ember a lot. He had started testosterone a year ago, and he had been ripped apart in the media for it. Aiden was with him through all of it, and Icarus was jealous, because he should have been going through those milestones with Aiden. Aiden should have been there at the first appointment, taught him how to shave, loved him when no one else would. Instead, it was Jacinto.

He was upset, he thought. He was deeply upset that Aiden had abandoned him like this, and he didn’t want to listen to his explanation. He didn’t want to forgive him, and he knew he would forgive him in an instant, the moment Aiden asked for it. Because he still loved him. And that was the most frustrating bit out of all of this. He wanted to forgive him. He wanted to be on good terms with him. He wanted…

He wanted it.

And he was stubbornly denying himself it.

With a sigh, he lifted his head as a red 370Z, a very familiar 370Z, pulled into the parking lot. It came to a halt, its engine rumbling, and Jesse Phillips in the flesh stepped out, locking the car and setting the alarm as he strode towards the building. What was he doing here? Ah, it was better this way. People would stop taking photos of Icarus---

Jesse stopped right across from Icarus and smiled at him, and Icarus stared at him.

“You ready?” he asked, grabbed Icarus’s arm, and pulled him off. “What are you waiting in line for? Let’s go.”

“What?” Icarus asked in confusion, and Jacinto sprinted after them.

“Who’s this? Your little friend?” Jesse asked, and Icarus flushed.

“This is Jacinto. What are you doing?”

“Taking care of you, clearly,” Jesse said as he reached the doors and knocked. Someone came forward and unlocked the doors to let them in, and Icarus practically wilted under the angry stares coming at him. “Oh, don’t mind them. You get preferential treatment. It’s not every day a specialist re-awakens.”

“You’re a specialist?” Jacinto asked. “You didn’t tell me you were a specialist.”

“I… There was a lot going on,” Icarus said weakly, and the doors opened to let them in.

“Yeah, that Olivia Rodrigo concert was crazy,” Jesse said with a laugh as he stepped through the doors. The worker closed the doors behind them and locked them again, and Jesse slung his arm over Icarus’s shoulders, making his skin prick in discomfort. Icarus wanted to shake him off, but he didn’t want to risk offending him. “Did you know someone died?”

Someone… died? What? Icarus… thought he did a good job. Was it not enough? Had he screwed up somewhere?

“Yeah, people are real mad at you,” Jesse said to Icarus in a whisper, and Icarus flushed.

“I’ve been an S-rank one day,” he mumbled, and Jesse laughed.

“Welcome to the world of expected perfection,” he said, and Icarus stared down at his Doc Martens. They were heavy. He wanted to take them off.

“Oh,” Icarus said numbly, and Jacinto hissed.

“Don’t scare him. There’s some internet trolls talking shit, nothing more than that,” Jacinto said, and Icarus flushed. “Everyone knows there’s casualties when there’s a dungeon break.”

“Jacinto, right?” Jesse asked lazily with a smile at Jacinto. “You’re prickly.”

“What the fuck does that mean?”

“This way, please,” the worker said and opened a door. Icarus looked at the familiar stone set up on a podium. It had been five years since he last saw it. It had been bitter disappointment the first time, and now it was going to be disappointing for an entirely other reason.

“Alright, pop your hand on there,” Jesse said and lifted up his phone to record, and Icarus nervously stepped forward and laid his hand on the stone. It did nothing for a moment, but that was normal, and then a screen populated above it.

Rank: S

Class: Guerilla Crocheter

Mana: 3000

Jesse let out a low whistle, and Icarus pulled his hand off of the stone as the worker carefully notated it in her tablet.

“3000? I don’t even have that much,” Jesse said, and Icarus rubbed his palm with his thumb nervously.

“It’s a mana intense class,” he mumbled, and the worker cleared her throat.

“We need to get your registration updated,” she said and walked to the door. “This way, Miss March.”

He flinched at the ‘Miss’, but she didn’t seem to notice. So, even S-ranks were misgendered, huh? That was just fantastic. Gods, it was going to be a long day.