Slime scrambled back and hit the bars of the cage before he shot a betrayed look back at all of the slimes watching what was going to be a TPK. Well, it would be a total party kill if he had a party to do this with. As it was, he was alone. He was on his own and he had no one to save him.

“Why did you all think this was a good idea?” he asked the slimes, and a big, booming laugh echoed around the chamber.

“Ah, I’ll squish you like a gnat!” the cannibal king said and one big hand lifted in the air. Slime’s eyes widened and he threw himself to the side just in time for the hand to come crashing down right where he was sitting. The ground cracked, and Slime’s eyes just about bugged out of his head. One blow from that hand would leave him a pavement smear. What the hell were these slime thinking? He was so scared right now. If he had bowels, they would be empty.

“Come here, little slime!” the cannibal king crooned and lifted his other hand. Slime launched himself across the floor and narrowly dodged a hit, and then he rolled to his feet and looked around wildly.

It was kill or be killed, but he didn’t have a way to win. He was just… What was he supposed to do here? What was he actually supposed to do?

“I said come here!” the cannibal king roared, and a sideswipe came in out of nowhere, smacking Slime into the wall and sending his slime body splattering across it. He gasped, expecting pain to flare, but there was nothing. He was fine. Oh, did this body not have a sense of pain? That was useful for dying.

But, now that he was eyeing the king, he realized this was going to be easy. The king telegraphed his moves well in advance, and was objectively an easy boss. He just had to avoid them. His body was apparently capable of putting itself back together, so he just had to…

Another hand was coming at him, and he dove forward and rolled through it. He was getting more accustomed to this new body, now that panic was surging in his nonexistent bloodstream. He just had to keep dodging, and he would be fine. He would be fine. He just had to…

Another hand came at him, and he leapt and rolled. It slammed into the ground, and he looked up. There were a ton of stalagmites in the ceiling, and he paused before…

He lashed out, and to his surprise, slime shot out of his hand and attached to a stalagmite. Oh. Okay. He tested it, ran back a few paces, and went flying, slamming into the stalagmite and splattering across it. His slime flowed back into his body, and he clung to it in fear. Okay. He was out of range of the hands now, but now what?

He looked over at the other stalagmites, and a plan started to form in his mind. He threw out a sticky length and it lashed around one stalagmite, and then he realized he could conceivably send them out from any point on his body. Was this body… broken?

It was broken, he realized with a high, bright laugh, and he shot out strands of goo, slamming into the various stalagmites and making a web. He attached them all to the stalagmite he was perched on, and the cannibal king slammed his hands into the ground.

“Get down and fight me, the would-be Slime King!” he roared, and Slime didn’t know what that was about, but he started rocking back and forth. There was a hairline crack on the stalagmite, and he could hear it crack even more, before---

He started to fall, and the stalagmites went down with him. He leapt off of the stalagmite, soaring through the air, and landed hard on the floor, rolling several feet before he smashed into the gate. The stalagmites and half the ceiling crashed down on the cannibal king, and there was a long, drawn out “EEEEEEEEEE!!!” that cut through the destruction and dust that rose. Slime lifted his hand to shield his eyes, and there were squeals of joy behind him. The slimes were all hopping in glee, and there was a pleasant ding.

“Congratulations, Slime. You have become the first Slime King,” said the automated female voice, and a status window appeared before him.

Slime

Age: 21

Level: 5

Titles: Slime King

Skills: Slime Command. Bend any slime to your will with a simple command. Slimes will naturally like you and side with you.

Okay… Okay, that worked. He could work with that.

On unsteady legs, he came to his feet and turned back to face the slimes. The gate slid open, and he frowned at them.

“Now why did you have to make me the sacrificial lamb?” he asked the slimes, and they rushed him, hopping around his legs and letting out squeaks of joy at the death of the cannibal king. He sighed and ran his hand through the tendrils that made up his hair, and then he looked up to the ceiling. There was a hole in it. Was he supposed to climb up through that, or was he supposed to wait?

“Notice: Transporting the player from the tutorial to the first floor,” came the female voice of the system, and he blinked.

In an instant, the scenery changed. He was suddenly in the middle of a crowded marketplace, and there was a slime at his feet. He looked down at it, and then he looked away, consciously aware that he was in his t-shirt and joggers, barefoot. He turned, and someone pushing a cart rumbled past him.

“Hello! Welcome!” someone said from behind him, and he leapt two feet in the air as he spun back around. There was a pleasant-looking girl standing there, dressed in a skirt with a button down top and a long coat over the top of it, boots that reached over her knees, and a staff. “You survived the tutorial! Good job!”

“Oh, uhm,” he stammered, and she smiled at him.

“I’m Lisa. What’s your name?” she asked, and he stared at her blankly.

“Slime,” he replied, and she blinked a few times before she laughed.

“Wow. The system sure does have a sense of humor, doesn’t it?” she asked, and he stared at her in silence. “Welcome to the tower! Good job killing twenty slimes!”

Wait… The normal quest was killing twenty slimes? Seriously? He had to face a mini-boss.

“Right…” he said, trailing off, and she smiled at him.

“I see you got the beast tamer trait. Was this little guy bullied by the other slimes?” she asked and reached down to pat the slime, who reared back and darted behind Slime’s legs. Okay, so it was shy. That was fine.

“Uh… Sort of?” he replied, and she beamed at him.

“You’ve got to get clothes. You should join my adventuring party!” she said, and he stared at her. Was it normal to offer an adventuring party to newbies right off the bat? “It pays well. We’re about to conquer the second level, so you only have to do three quests on the first level to join us! We can help!”

“Oh, uhm, thank you,” he stammered, not sure if he should accept, but she seemed… fine, he guessed. Someone appeared right next to him, and he jumped out of his skin and screamed as the man stumbled forward, a sword in hand, dressed in jeans and a t-shirt and ratty Converse.

“Oh! You’re new, too!” Lisa said, and Slime stared at him. Seriously? He got a sword? Slime didn’t get a sword!

“Oh, uh,” the guy said, and Lisa beamed at him.

“You should join our adventuring party, too! We’re always looking to help out the newbies!” she said, and Slime had a bad feeling about this. Why was she offering the adventuring party to just anyone and everyone that showed up?

“Thank you for the offer, but I think I need to figure out the Tower on my own,” Slime said, and she frowned at him. Something dangerous flashed in her eyes, but he could just be seeing things.

“Well, if you want to do that, too,” she said and offered her hand to the man. “I’m Lisa.”

“Richie,” he said and shook her hand, and she smiled at him pleasantly.

“Let me show you around town, Richie,” she said and turned aside. “This way!”

With that, Lisa and Richie walked away, and Slime turned around the marketplace. It was loud and bustling, and he felt a little overwhelmed. He was hungry, too, but he had no money for food, so…

His eye was drawn to a message board, and he walked up to it and examined the quests there. Gathering herbs, killing monsters, running errands, standard rpg stuff. It had been a long time since he played an rpg. He generally stuck with roguelikes. One drew his attention. A missing little boy in the forest. He assumed NPC, but he wasn’t sure he wanted to take it. On one hand, it paid well. On the other hand, quests like that generally promised higher difficulties. He would probably die, but he could learn the forest that way and probably finish a few other quests while he was doing it. There was a glowing button on the screen, and he hit ‘accept’ before he accepted a few more quests. Gathering herbs, killing a wild boar, and that should do it. He would be able to eat as soon as he was done.

Gathering herbs was first on the list.

“Status window,” he said, and the status window popped up. He clicked a few floating buttons, and ah, there was a map and all of his saved quests. Good. He could keep track of them that way.

There were markers on the map, big circles that told him the general area he had to go to, and so he headed out, the slime hopping alongside him as he headed for the forest outside of town. People watched him go, and he wished he wasn’t barefoot. Not that he was feeling any pain, but he was letting people get a good look at his feet for free. That was unacceptable to him. People sold photos for that.

He headed through the streets, following the screen in front of him, and soon, he was hitting a clearing where half a dozen other players were gathering the herbs. He headed off to the left. He only had to gather ten, so he was sure he could get it done.

The other circle was moving on the screen, letting him know the boar was in motion, and he bent over and grabbed a fistful of the herb he was looking for. Hitoke herb, said the screen. Useful in healing potions. Okay. So, this was a crash course in the herbs in the world that could help him. Though, he wasn’t sure a healing potion would work on him. He would have to test it.

He pulled out a fistful of the herb, coming out to ten relatively quickly, and then he checked for an inventory. There was no inventory, and he hissed through his teeth in annoyance. So, he would have to carry all of this back to town. He had no bag.

With a sigh, he headed back to the town, fistfuls of the herb with delicate purple flowers in his hand. An adventuring party passed him as the slime hopped alongside him, and he looked down at it. It was weirdly shiny, and not the same color as him. He was a brilliant aquamarine, while this thing was more of a soft blue.

“I guess I can name you Blue,” he said to the slime, and it wiggled down in excitement. “You like that? Blue?”

He wondered what other varieties of slime there were in this world, and if he could level Blue up. He hoped he could level him up. It would be a pity if he got to higher levels and Blue got killed. With a groan, he stretched out as he walked, headed into the city. It was bustling and busy, and he wondered if Blue had to eat. Probably. He could probably just eat grass, but Slime would feel bad if he didn’t share his food with him.

He reached the apothecary after some wandering around, ignoring the food stands serving mouth watering food, and pushed open the door. It jingled, and the NPC behind the counter perked up.

“Hello!” he said happily, and Slime waved.

“Here to complete a quest,” he said and put the herbs on the counter, and the NPC brightened up.

“Oh, good job!” he said and counted out the coins. “Here you go! That should be enough to get some food in your belly!”

“Thank you,” Slime said, and turned for the door. Food was the first thing on the checklist. Then, he would get some better clothes. And shoes. He desperately needed shoes.

Ah. He was a fucking slime. Gods, this was a fucking nightmare. Why couldn’t he be a normal human, or a tiefling or something? Why a slime?

It was fine. He got free top surgery, so he couldn’t complain. He hadn’t even gotten to go on hormones yet in the real world. And his voice dropped. So, really, this was totally awesome. This was totally awesome. He shouldn’t complain too much.

Fuck.

He had to find that little boy now. Preferably before the boar, because he had no idea how he was going to get the boar back to town. The reward would probably be low for the difficulty level, he thought in annoyance. It would probably be very, very low.

Oh, well. It would probably level him up quickly, so he couldn’t complain too much. Right?