Part – 16
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{Alice}

I looked at the thing before me in horror. I had been angry at Ithelyn before but now I was utterly terrified. How could she, have tricked me so? I should have been able to feel who or rather what she was. The thought that something like her could walk around unnoticed like that shocked me more than finding out that I was a demon. At least demons came into existence naturally and had actual, real emotions, shitty emotions maybe but they were true emotions. If a demon was happy, they were happy, if a demon was angry they were definitely angry.

This thing before me though, I knew for a fact that it couldn’t have emotions! And yet, it still hurt to see her cry like that. It shouldn’t have hurt, knowing what she was, but it still did. Up until now all about Ithelyn had seemed so real and human; even knowing what she was hadn’t changed that. In fact Hugin’s memories in my head were very clear about her being human and nothing else. Which simply couldn’t be true!

Alice” The thing spoke. “Please trust me! None of this is what you think...”

Looking at her dejected expression I wanted to believe that her words were the truth but I forced myself not to. She was the Sun Scion, at most her body was but a well animated marionette. It was best to run away as quickly as I could but first I needed to find some way to knock her out. That trophy over there looked pretty heavy, if only I could reach it.

Alice... stop looking at my ballet trophy like that! It is rather dear to me so please don’t break it! No! Alice!”

Ignoring her warning and desperate plea I rushed forward as quickly as my mangled body allowed for. I barely managed to make it off of the bed, when a thundering voice echoed in my head.

STOP!“

My body froze up immediately. Like a salt statue I was sitting there while my mind was abuzz with thoughts.

I was ordered to stop! Of course I would stop, I need to stop when told to. My Mistress’ orders are shackles and laws and wonderful commandments! And yet I despise this, I am not allowed to despise this but I still do. I don’t want to be controlled but I do! What is going on here!? NO! I want this!”

As suddenly as this horrible limbo of hate and want had come, it also vanished again. In one moment I was still frozen and in the next I slumped to the ground in a graceless pile of limbs and self pity. My breaths came short and painful as if a heavy weight had been crushing my chest. Slowly and apprehensively I turned towards the origin of this newest of mental horrors.

Ithelyn was standing there still clutching on to the fluffy pink bath-towel, from the look in her eyes she was almost as horrified as I was. Then again it could have all been an act. The Sun Scion wasn’t supposed to be a human, but Hells if she really was the Vessel for the monster I had heard about, then how the fuck did she manage to get tainted with the Striga blood?

Alice…” Lyn began before stopping herself. “No, I am sorry but I wanna do this correctly. Not this fake thing we have been playing for the last few days. I... this will probably hurt us both so badly but you were right hiding everything from you is not going to work.”

Ithelyn… please.” I had a horrible gut feeling about what she was about to do, and I really, really didn’t like it!

No, you want the truth so here is the whole fucking thing!”

I tried crawling towards her, desperate to stop her from doing what I had no idea what it was, but it was far too late.

Ali’ce Desra! REMEMBER!”

I cried I out as all of a sudden memories and thoughts my own and yet not my own assaulted my mind. It was as if my self was suddenly becoming aware of being but a drop inside an ocean. Everything suddenly became so much clearer as memories played back in my mind different than I rememberer them to be.

I could feel the soft comfort of my egg as my human body was growing in it, sleeping safe and sound until the day that it was strong enough to house me.

I struggled to get out of the shell, angry and upset about my soft and weak human body. But looking at my mothers was enough to calm me down.

I had tried flying out of the window only to end up crushed on the forest floor. My mom was horrified but my demon mother was only looking on slighty annoyed. They had an argument after that.

They were fighting for two days now, in her anger Mom had ripped the glittering band from her neck and thrown it at my Mother. Later that night Mom had run out of the hut with me. I could hear my Mother scream in anger but Mom didn’t look back.

An old lady was holding me and chanting some strange words, my thought were starting to grow heavy and weird. Afterwards a bunch of women were celebrating my birthday and Mom was crying in another woman’s shoulder.

My sixth birthday, and nobody had come but my family. The other kids were afraid of me. Everyone was calling me a demon child, I didn’t know what that meant. Mom said that I was something called a changeling and that I didn’t need to worry, she would always take care of me.

Green flames and screaming, nobody had come again! I was so sick of all these fucking humans! Why was I still stuck in this feeble pathetic body? Why wasn’t I with my sisters? Grandma approached me with a grim expression and suddenly I was terrified. I didn’t want to forget again!

He was sitting before me naked and exposed. It had been so very had to drag him all the way to the woods but finally I had found my Mom’s old hut! His screams were so pleasurable when I sank my teeth into his twitching flesh! Best boyfriend ever!

I was staring off into nothing again, my thoughts were always so hazy. I should rip out that nagging woman’s eyes and eat them in front of her! Why was I here again? Oh, I was being throw out of the building, did this mean I needed a new job?

Magic was hard! But I had finally done it! I was so happy to show my Mom the pocket space I had created but she only looked at me with sadness. I guess making a portal to the hells was bad? Why did everyone always patronize me?

I couldn’t help but stare at the woman before me, she was beautiful like a statute carved out of marble. Her skin was perfect, her hair looked so soft, her eyes were like bright green pools that I could lose myself in. I needed to be with her! But she only said: Forget.

Lyn was really cute when she pretended to be a good person. Perhaps it wouldn’t suck too much to be her familiar? And being the slave of someone like her was going to drive both my mothers insane! Yes, this was the perfect plan!

With a shock I came back to myself. I looked up at Ithelyn, red tears were running down her cheek. For but a moment our eyes met and I feared to lose myself again. Then without warning the air around her shattered.

Ali’ce Desra! Behold your Mistress! Behold the scion of the fucking sun!”

Ithelyn’s hair and facial features seemed to melt and drip to the floor until only her ears and her beautiful lips were left on an otherwise smooth and terrifying head. Her body shuddered as four bloody wings ripped their way out of her back. A dozen eyes were staring at me; half of them were dark red, black tears falling from them like rain. The shattered remains of a glowing halo swirled around her faceless head. There was no expression and yet our connection allowed me to feel just how much pain this was causing her.

Is this what you wanted?” Lyn’s voice was weak and hollow, a far cry from the thundering echo it had been before. “Here you have your stupid Sun Scion, a pathetic farce! I failed at being an Angel and I failed at being a human so now it’s about time I fail at being a thrice cursed Striga too!”

I’m… I’m sorry Ithelyn.” My demonic tongue seemed almost blasphemous in front of her now. “I didn’t want to hurt you!”

The words came out of me with out thinking, I didn’t know if it was the familiar contract or my real feelings but I knew it to be true. I had never wanted to hurt her like this! What had I done?

{Ithelyn}

With a weak sigh I dismissed my wings and halo. I was happy enough that there wasn’t a mirror inside the room. I had no desire to look at myself, my “real” self that was. The perfectly crafted homunculus I inhabited had long ago started to feel more like my self than the angelic form. Of course this had come with more than enough heart break on it’s own.

Lady Dawnstar had always despised me for what I was, even if I yearned for her love she had only ever seen me as the thing made from her daughter’s sacrifice. Unlike Mister Dawnstar who had embraced me as his daughter after I had fled from the Sun Cult. He had taught me all about life and magic after my angelic memories had faded away and only his daughter’s had remained.

Having only Ithelyn’s child hood memories to go on, it had almost broken me to see and feel Mother’s rejection of me. I had never wanted to be bound to this world or this body but she had always treated me like it was all my fault. In her eyes I was a disgrace and a monster. And perhaps in a way I was… after all I had stolen the real Ithelyn’s identity, grown up to become a useless pervert and even managed to sully her sacrifice by getting infected with the blood curse.

I could feel the blood flow from my eyes in a sick mockery of tears but I didn’t care enough to wipe them away. All I wanted was to cry myself to sleep and forget about today. Every time the fucking Cultists managed to find me it was the same thing again and again. I truly wished someone would just get rid of them all, so that they could never again remind me of my past.

Lyn…” I jerked back in surprise when I heard Alice say my name.

I would have expected her to run away after what I had done. Confronting her with her own past was such a dick move… I didn’t know what she had seen but I could feel that it troubled her. Some kind of Angel I was alright, a fucking asshole more like.

A sudden slap to my face brought me back to reality.

I fucking hate you for what you just did, thanks to your little mental break it is going to take way too much effort for me to go back to being just Alice! But for fucks sake I can’t stand to see you cry. So uhm… I’m sorry for bringing this up and blowing up on you.”

In a sudden and very undemonic display of concern, Alice or who ever she was right now, leaned in and hugged me.

If you ever wanna tell me the whole story, Alice will… no, I will listen.”

Thank you… Allie.”

I guess I can live with that nick name.”

That’s what you get for always calling me Lyn.”

Hehe.”

Both of us started to managed to get out a weak chuckle at this. At least all that hadn’t changed, truly we were a pair of idiots.

Sadly our short moment of bonding was ripped apart by a sudden knocking on the door.

Miss Dawnstar, we know you have Miss Dutrar with you, the Headmistress dearly wishes to speak with the both of you… right now if you please.”

7