Qiao Tian Zhu woke in his bed with a sigh.
It was a large bed. It was comfortable. The room was large and bright, he had his own television, computer, bathroom…
It looked like a hotel room. Except for his clothes inside the wardrobe, nothing here was his. He would be able to move out fully within an hour.
Glancing at the clock, he found that it was just before eight in the morning. Because his brother would still be sleeping after yesterday’s gala, the house would still be quiet.
Dragging his feet over the carpet, Tian Zhu walked towards the bathroom and pulled off his loose shirt and trousers.
The bathroom was beautiful - white tiles, softly turquoise accents, a giant bathtub and shower and large mirrors on the walls. The floor was heated and comfortable under his bare feet.
Stepping out of his underwear, Tian Zhu halted in front of the mirror and dragged his bed-hair out of his face. His fingers moved along the lines of his cheek, down to his jaw.
He was a pretty handsome guy. If he looked at himself objectively, he could be an actor or model. He had the features of an idol, just like his mother, and didn’t have much of his father’s stony looks.
From his legs, over his stomach and chest, all the way to his arms, muscles were straining. He wasn’t broad with muscles but well-trained and his skin had a soft, surprisingly healthy shade of tanning. His face had slightly softer lines, which suited his eastern blood, and narrow but not small eyes.
He wasn’t the type to grow a beard, even now, leaving only his hair to surround his face. It was maybe a bit longer than usual and inky black. Sadly it tended to be surprisingly messy and not smooth but that worked well enough.
His eyes had jumped over his mother’s genes and had taken his father’s: They were a very, very pale green that looked quite grey.
Lifting both hands, Tian Zhu dragged his lips into a smile. The mirror-image smiled back - forced and without any emotion.
He let his hands fall again and turned the shower on.
The dreams always made him sweat horribly. He was not in a hurry, so he enjoyed a nice, long and hot shower that he finished by dressing in a bathrobe and walking back to bed.
Throwing himself onto the sheets, he pulled the single thing that he truly felt belonged to him out of his nightstand. A cellphone. Not the one given by his parents but his own.
Opening his social media account, he scrolled around.
The reports about the dream were there again. Numb. Something everybody was used to.
Once a week, three to ten people across the country. Moving out did not help - as long as you had been born here, you were stuck. It was going on for over a year now.
At least fifteen, no older than fifty. No preferred gender, occupation, lifestyle, looks, character… No connection at all. Nowhere. Either you woke up in the dream or you didn’t.
...Either you woke up from it in the morning or you didn’t. There was no rhyme or reason for who died, either.
Tian Zhu wasted half an hour reading the comments and discussions out of habit before he dragged himself back into the bathroom.
From here on, he truly was on autopilot.
Wear the simple-looking clothes, made from good material but badly cut for his body so that they’d hang weirdly. Make sure his arms are covered. Brush down his hair so that it would stick into his face, wear the old-fashioned glasses and slump his shoulders.
There was nothing left of the handsome young man in the mirror. It was perfect like this.
When he stepped out of his room, quiet like a ghost, one of the maids flinched before she gave him an awkward bow in greeting.
His slippers made no sound as he walked down the marble staircase and into the dining room. His father and mother were there, fawning over his brother again.
Yang Mi had moved her chair to be pretty much attached to her oldest son’s. Her pitch-black hair was tied up and matched with a traditional hairpin, revealing her small and beautiful face. Even after two children, she was still pretty. A true white lotus.
Lawrence did not look bad for his age, either, but he was too broad and manly for Tian Zhu’s tastes. With his short beard and broad stature, he looked very much like the western man he was.
And then there was Ling Xian. They sure pulled no punches when deciding on his name.
In all honesty, Ling Xian was not as outstanding in his looks as Tian Zhu was. He did look good, but because he was closer to their father’s appearance, he did not fit into the common beauty standard that was trending nowadays as well as his younger brother did.
That was why Tian Zhu had to make sure he did not look good next to his brother, so that Ling Xian could look better.
“There you are”, Yang Mi called out to her second son. With a short movement of her hand, she waved him over. “Sit down and eat. We are almost finished.”
That was why he was only coming now.
Tian Zhu sat down next to his older brother and ate with his head lowered. He was using his left hand to handle the spoon for the soup, the movement a bit awkward.
Lawrence sighed. “Watch out or you’ll spill it. Sheesh, that’s why we can’t take you out.”
It’s because you don’t want to do it.
That was why he was using his left hand instead of his dominant right one. A convenient excuse for them.
“Tian Zhu”, Ling Xian hummed in an apologetic tone. He was rubbing his head with a lopsided smile. “Sorry, I got home so late yesterday. I don’t think I have the time to teach you maths today.”
“It’s fine”, Tian Zhu whispered back through his hoarse throat. “I’ll manage somehow.”
He would have to get a lower grade this time, since Ling Xian didn’t have time for his lessons.
Even though he didn’t need them.
Even though he could solve the entrance exam for the country’s most prestigious university at ten.
Even though-
...It did not matter, anyway. There wasn’t even anger in his stomach. He was tired, so tired. Tired of always being less than Ling Xian.
Couldn’t that guy be a bit talented, at least? Did he not know how much Tian Zhu had to lower himself to be below him? It truly was hard to get to that level.
He was wasting away.
Did not need to do anything and did not feel like it.
It was painful.
But he did not want to be a threat for his brother and become involved in that ridiculous play of schemes that would start. He had seen it happen. They’d try to get rid of him.
After so many years, it wasn’t just a matter of waiting until he could run away anymore.
He knew he wouldn’t do it even if he had the chance. He had become too stagnant and tired to move.
“Dear, you haven’t been drawn into one of these strange dreams yet, right?”, Yang Mi asked her oldest son with worry. “You would tell us if you had, right?”
“Of course I would. But I’m fine, nothing has ever happened to me”, Ling Xian laughed. “How about you, Tian Zhu? Are you sleeping well?”
“Obviously he is. Look at how late he got up”, Yang Mi chided playfully.
The youth did not respond. That was how it was; his parents would rather he not be around and his older brother loved having the ugly comparison.
His father had been successful to a certain level, but he truly rose after marrying his wife, whose family was generations over generations of powerful businessmen. A very strict line with a lot of rules and absolute patriarchy.
So Yang Mi got herself a husband that loved her to death, to make sure that she would be able to keep her influence. She got a son who would become the heir, as she was the oldest of three sisters and her son the firstborn.
There was absolutely no way for anyone else to become the heir. They’d rather invest money and time to groom the eldest than allow a younger one to take his place.
That’s why his parents had disregarded him. Not only was he a danger to his older brother - especially power-hungry younger brothers had killed in their family before - he was also useless.
The best was to have one son first and then daughters to marry into other families. She did not want a second, intelligent son.
And Ling Xian did not like a little brother who could surpass him.
Those who said that blood ties were strong and that family loved each other could all go to hell. Those people did not know how cruel children could be.
Tian Zhu had only rarely been physically hurt by Ling Xian. It was mostly a mental thing.
Mother, Tian Zhu destroyed my homework. I’m sure I would have gotten a good grade but now I have nothing to give to the teacher.
Mother, Tian Zhu tripped and broke my phone. I’m sure it was an accident, but…
Mother, Tian Zhu is lying. He said he could solve these questions but I saw him looking them up on his phone.
Whether Yang Mi and Lawrence knew, it did not matter. They believed Ling Xian’s words without a doubt. Tian Zhu was only supposed to be a pillar that strengthened his brother’s good impression on everyone.
At first, it had been sad because he did not understand why his family did not love him.
Then it became painful when school dragged and dragged and he was surrounded by idiots.
By now he was numb.
He really liked the internet - it allowed him free access to all kinds of interesting things and complicated concepts, to at least alleviate some of the nagging boredom in his head.
He thought about the little lady he had seen in last night’s dream. What had happened to make her cry so bitterly?
