I looked up towards the voice which had spoken to me. Looking down at me was a lamia, her tail wrapped around a thick branch of the tree. Was she there the entire time?! Oh gods please tell me I didn't mutter anything out loud like I sometimes do. She flashed a sweet smile, the iridescent scales of her tail were highlights by pricks on sunlight filtering through the tree.
"Ssso..are you ok missss?" I sighed, grumbling. Why did she care anyway? It was probably just to satisfy her own curiosity.
"Yes, I'm perfectly fucking fine." She gave a thoughtful hum in response. I took in more details of her, she seemed pretty flat and wore a comfy and fluffy looking navy blue hoodie, probably cause she's cold blooded or something. Every so often a small forked tongue would dart out from between her soft lips.
"I can tell that'sss a lie missss, but I won't pry. I'm Nyssshia by the way." Her voice was soft, calm, it sounded, nice, it just felt kinda nice to be around her. My grumbling grew silent as I just ate a spoonful of the chilli. I couldn't actually talk to her about all this shit..could I? She'd probably just tell me the problem's stupid, or use it against me or something. Or she'd think I'm fucking insane for saying I've been reincarnated and shit..I couldn't stop the tears forming, streaming down my cheeks, I was fucking alone when it came to this issue, sure in this world I might actually have a mum, but I was still fucking alone.
A tail coiled around my midsection, squeezing gently..almost like a hug. Nyshia had moved down from the tree, sitting beside me.
"I'll let you go if you want missss...but you looked like you needed thisss. And itsss alright to cry you know..there'sss nothing weak about it." How the fuck did she know I thought crying was weak..was I that damn predictable?..was she a mind reader? Oh gods if she was a mind-reader she'd know all this shit about me! I looked up at her...she probably wasn't a mind reader...she was just..caring..she was actually caring.. That shouldn't be such an odd idea..but it just is. I leant into the gentle squeeze of the tail, it reminded me of a weighted blanket.
"Its..its ok..and crying is weak...I'm meant to be strong...manly..." Her eyebrow raised at the last part..shit it slipped out! Was she going to figure it out? She seemed smart enough to draw that kind of fucking connection. Oh gods what was I going to do?..
"And is that you ssspeaking..or othersss ssspeaking through you?" Her tail pulled me a bit closer to her, against the warmness of her fluffy hoodie.. It was...wasn't it me speaking...right?..I was meant to be strong and manly...not, this...not a cute girl that gets flustered by strong guys and other cute girls...but then why was there that pleasant feeling every time I felt girly?... I..I don't fucking get anything.
"I don't...I don't know..I don't know a fucking thing that I'm supposed to!" I cried out with..anger?..sadness?..grief?..who knows. In my outburst of emotion I accidentally slammed my fist down, hitting the girls tail..provoking a surprised yelp...Fuck! God fucking damnit! Here someone was trying to fucking help me and my stupid ass goes and hurts them. The stream of tears was stronger now, my eyes hurt from it.
"I'm sorry..I'm so fucking stupid..can't even let a fucking pretty and nice person help me without being a fucking asshole" She..didn't get mad though..she didn't raise her voice or shout like she should've...instead she just smiled sweetly, running a soft hand through my hair.
"Misss.."
"Nixi..call me Nixi.."
"Nixi..it'sss ok. I underssstand that you're frussstrated, you feel like you're meant to know thisss ssstuff about yourssself, but you don't. Asss I sssaid before, I won't pry. If you wisssh to talk about this ssstuff with me, I won't ssshare anything, I ssswear it on my life." Her hands were soft, comforting.. I was completely leaning against her just...crying. This wasn't how it was meant to go..I was meant to just process this stuff on my own...but I couldn't even manage that..I..I just want to know what's wrong with me..
"..Ok..but if you tell anyone..I'll fucking..I dunno...do bad shit or something...and I don't blame you if you think the shit i'm gonna say is insane.." I sighed..didn't even have the energy for a good threat.
"Underssstood Nixi, ssstart whenever you're ready." I took a deep breath..well..at least I'll see how true to her word she is.
"..Well...I'm not even meant to be a fucking girl...I used to be a human guy..in a completely normal world and..then I died...but I woke up here...yeah fucking insane I know.."
"Actually Nixi, it'sss incredibly believable, reincarnation isss a well recorded topic" What?...so all that fucking worrying..and it was just a normal thing?! That was..good right?
"..really?...well..that's not the party that matters..its this body..its...I don't know..." She nodded..as if she'd been expecting this topic to come up.
"Yes..dysssphoria is a commonly recorded thing in thossse that have been reincarnated...now the important question isss, do you hate your current body?" Did I hate it?..no..I looked good...I felt pleasant tingles when people did stuff like called me cute, or referred to me by Nixi.
"..No...the opposite actually...its..nice..but it shouldn't be..right? I'm meant to be a guy..." She just shook her head.
"Nixi..did your old body ever feel right, did it feel nice, or did you feel empty, hollow?" ..yeah...I did...I hated that fucking body..all that stupid hair..all the having to be 'strong' and 'manly'... I hated it.. I just nodded, staying quiet.
"Nixi, did you ever consider that, you could be trans? If I said that it felt nice when I called you a girl, as compared to calling you a guy, would I be right." ..She was right at that second part..being called a girl didn't leave me with that same..eugh feeling as being called a guy. But..I couldn't be trans could I?..He'd kill me if I was...wait...he..wasn't here...he wasn't here.
"..you'd be right...but how do I even explain such a fucking thing..I mean my dad...my old dad..would kill me.." She chuckled, almost with a slight mischievous tone.
"Nixi, you forget one major thing, no one needsss to know that you're reincarnated.. If you truly wissshed to, you can jussst leave your old life behind." ..that...that was an option...just abandon that old life..I mean, I didn't have friends...and my dad wouldn't care about losing a.. 'useless sissy of a son'...so...yeah...I could do that..I could just, be Nixi.. A smile tugged at the corner of my lips..I could be just Nixi. I hugged Nyshia tightly.
"..Thank you.."
"Itsss no worriesss Nixi, I'm alwaysss happy to help." It didn't really feel fair, I mean she helped me with the biggest fucking problem I was having and it was supposed to just be..no worries?
"No I feel like I have to make this up to you.." She chuckled.
"Well, sssince I can tell you're gonna be ssstuborn about thisss, jussst ssstart by sssharing that chilli"
Nice snake-lady doing some good needed work there.
Personally i'd like to see more magical things. Potions that go boom, heal things, change things or literal magic would be fun.. A magic competition or something.
It would be great to learn more about the mom and the rest of the family too.
That said, don't feel pressured to do any of that. Follow your idea for the story and everything will go well
Oh that is definitely coming, I have plans for stuff like magic competitions, potion shenanigans, some family time.
Maybe or maybe not some fun stuff in spring too
hugs to nixi from me gender is so phucked. also this is kinda scarily accurate
I think it would be cool if there were a race like minotaurs in this school, on the school's physical education court on some sports team. If she's ever felt a little "hot" seeing the satyr muscles, imagine how she'll feel with the minotaurs
I really like this story, it makes your curiosity want more, and if I were to give a suggestion for direction I think she should follow the lamia's advice and not tell anyone about her reincarnation