“Hey, idiot! I still have my clothes on,” Sayaka-chan scolded me and pulled her hand away from mine.

“Oh yeah. Sorry, I got carried away in my excitement.”

“You’re not a child, you idiot. You shouldn’t be so easily influenced by emotions,” Sayaka-chan lectured me like I was a pouting toddler.

“That’s easy for you to say, you barely show any emotion at all,” I pouted petulantly.

The moment those words left my mouth I regretted it. Her lips twisted into a scowl and her eyes darkened from anger. My previous statement was immediately debunked in the most unfortunate manner for me. After spending weeks trying to get on her good side, I pissed her off.

“You’re just too dense to notice them, dummy. Maybe I’m a bit more reserved than you are, but I’d rather be that way than give people the wrong idea,” she spat back before storming back to the umbrella.

She removed her outerwear in a huff and angrily applied sunblock to her skin, something that I had been looking forward to for days. Any hope that I had to make up with her while swimming was dashed the moment she grabbed Himari-chan by the wrist and rushed into the water without even glancing in my direction.

“You just had to be snarky,” Touka snickered at my predicament. “It was bold of you to accuse her of being emotionless straight to her face.”

“Is that what she told you guys,” I questioned in disbelief. “I just said she doesn’t show her emotions well, not that she doesn’t feel anything!”

“Either way, it’s not a very nice thing to say to the girl you’re supposedly in love with. Even if it’s true, it’s not something you say to someone in such a blunt manner.”

“Well, now she’s being the immature one by ignoring me instead of just talking things through. She’s just proving my point!”

“Dude, how dumb are you? She probably knows that she’s not good at expressing herself, but she didn’t like you of all people criticizing her for it. Think about it; would she be this upset if some random person said that about her? She obviously likes you to some degree, otherwise she wouldn’t have been so affected by your words.”

When did Touka become the beacon of understanding and empathy, I asked myself. The airhead who inadvertently flirted with customers in front of her long-time girlfriend was lecturing me for being insensitive towards the person I liked. Either she was a hypocrite, or I did something so obviously stupid that even she could pick up it.

“I hate it when you’re right,” I grumbled. “It would be so much easier if I knew how she actually felt about me. Half of the time, I’m questioning whether she just tolerates me.”

“Yeah, she agreed to live with someone she tolerates,” Touka quipped. “I don’t know about her romantic feelings for you, but she clearly treasures you in her own way. You were talking about harpooning an innocent boy just because he had the audacity to ask her a question, yet now you’re being a stubborn idiot.”

“Which reminds me, where is that guy? I wanted to have a few words with him,” I questioned in a foreboding tone.

“Hmm… Pfftahaha! Take a look,” she scoffed as she pointed out his location. “It seems like he’s chatting up your beloved again.”

“What,” I exclaimed in shock and twisted around to find Sayaka-chan chatting with the guy before in waist-deep water. “What’s his excuse this time; checking out whether her swimsuit's waterproof!?”

“It looks more like he’s complimenting her,” Touka chuckled. “He’s got great timing too since you just insulted her and she’s looking to be complimented.”

“Of course he’s going to compliment her, she’s the cutest girl on this beach! But I wanted to be the one to say that and he’s just swooping to steal my thunder!”

“Then you better get over there to protect your girl,” Touka snickered, finding the whole situation hilarious in spite of me.

My feet moved as if they had a mind of their own, rushing to Sayaka-chan’s defense from a perverted boy with lascivious intentions. Despite her plain looking one-piece, Sayaka-chan looked extremely adorable, enough to catch the eye of anyone who had good taste. There was no way I was going to let some silly argument stop me from protecting her from the filthy looks that boys would undoubtedly shoot her way.

“H-hey, what’s going on,” I stuttered out as I fought to catch my breath.

“Oh, I was just asking Tanaka-san for her phone number,” the embodiment of human trash replied nervously.

“Eh!?”

“I’m not sure that’s a good idea,” Sayaka-chan rejected much too politely.

“It was worth a shot, right,” the living dumpster laughed. “Will you be around for a while, at least?”

“For the next couple of weeks, but we’ll be working most days,” Sayaka-chan answered.

“Oh, where do you guys work? I’ll stop by sometime.”

Before Sayaka-chan could reject him again, Touka jumped at the opportunity to advertise her business. She was truly shameless.

“We run the ice cream store just down the road! You should bring your friends along!”

“Will do! See you later,” the degenerate called as he jogged over to where his friends were.

“Just asking about your swimsuit,” I asked Sayaka-chan sarcastically.

“Not exactly,” she grumbled. “Why do you care? There’s nothing wrong with talking to someone, is there?”

“If you want to talk to someone, you could just talk to me.”

“Why are you being so possessive? Didn’t you just get annoyed with my lack of emotional expression when talking?”

“You call me an idiot all the time, but you don’t see me getting upset with you! Why is this any different,” I questioned.

“Because you act like an idiot sometimes! That doesn’t mean I don’t like talking to you or being around you. You made it sound like it was frustrating just talking to me, of course I was upset!”

“Geez, get a room, you two,” Touka groaned in annoyance. “Come on, Rina. You two need some time to cool off.”

Touka grabbed my wrist and led me further down the beach, away from where Sayaka-chan was venting to Himari-chan. Once again, I messed up and got mad at her over nothing. At the rate we were going, we’d break up before we even got together.

“You’re so stupid,” Touka sighed once we were out of earshot. “Getting jealous and taking it out on Sayaka-chan is just pathetic.”

“I know, I just couldn’t handle seeing her talking to some guy. For some reason, I want her all to myself, even though I know it’s wrong.”

“Look, I get it. You were a lonely girl who was never accepted by anyone before, and you desperately want to hold onto the first person who did. But acting like she belongs to you is going too far. She won’t fall for you if you make her feel ashamed for talking to other people.”

“I know, I know. This was the first time I’ve seen her talking to a boy that I didn’t know. She’s cute, so it makes sense that boys would hit on her. Since I’m not sure about her sexuality, I’m anxious that she’ll fall for a guy before she falls for me.”

“Geez. You’re such an idiot. If she’s as against romance as you say she is, then it’ll take a lot more than talking to a random guy on the beach for her to change her mind. For now, let’s give her some space and you two can talk it out this evening.”

Touka grabbed my wrist and pulled me along into the water. The cool ocean water made me aware of how hot it was and was a welcome respite. A couple of deep breaths of the salty air was all it took to calm my mind and lull me into a state of relaxation. Touka was right; brooding over our argument would only make things worse.

It was our first time arguing about something so trivial, and I could only feel guilty since I was the one who found fault from nothing. Despite what I kept telling myself, it was hard to hold myself back from rushing her. I had to keep reminding myself that we hadn’t known each other for that long, and that we still had a few months before we graduated. We wouldn’t have any concrete ideas about our futures until the winter, yet here I was during summer break stressing over her moving away.

All I could do was be patient, and hope that our relationship wouldn’t degrade before I had the chance to tell her how I felt.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

It wasn’t until after eight in the evening that Sayaka-chan returned to the apartment. She spent the whole day with Himari-chan, disappearing after spending a couple of hours at the beach. That meant I had to spend the whole day with my annoying aunt. Touka was an extremely lively person, and almost habitually happy, which made the day fun but extremely tiring. As such, I had been home for over an hour when Sayaka-chan walked through the door.

She looked relaxed and refreshed, like she had spent the whole day at a spa. Knowing Himari-chan, it was absolutely possible that she indeed took her to a spa. Touka was fortunate that she found someone as chill as Himari-chan, who was probably the only person who could put up with my aunt’s personality. It was a wonder where she got it from considering my mother was a workaholic who cared about work more than anything.

“How was your day,” I asked, testing the waters of Sayaka-chan’s mood.

“It was fine,” she answered bluntly.

An awkward silence settled in between us, which was exactly what I had been fearing. She didn’t look upset anymore, but I wasn’t the best at reading her. Of course, I wasn’t going to tell her that again, lest she get mad at me all over again. Much to my surprise, she was the one who spoke first.

“I’m sorry for yelling at you earlier, and for getting mad at you. I know you didn’t mean it as an insult, it just annoyed me because I thought I had been getting better with expressing my emotions.”

“It’s alright, I’m equally to blame for being insensitive. I guess I was just a little jealous that you were talking to someone else when I hoped it would just be the two of us. My aunt and her girlfriend didn’t help with that either though,” I said as I tried my hardest not to share too much.

“He really did just ask me about my swimsuit the first time he talked to me. The second time he talked to me was because he saw me talking to you and he wanted me to give him your phone number. I guess I was a little jealous too and I ended up taking it out on you.”

“Really!? Thank goodness that’s all it was,” I said with a sigh of relief. “What a creep; asking my friend for my number instead of talking to me himself. Not like I’d give it to him either way. Though, it does feel kind of nice to hear that you were jealous over me.”

Her cheeks erupted in a bright red blush as the embarrassment set in. While she wasn’t good at expressing most of her emotions, her face always gave her away whenever she was embarrassed. It was unfair how cute she was whenever she attempted to hide her face whenever it turned a shade of vermillion.

“How about we change the subject? I’ve been wondering this for a while, but what kind of books have you been reading lately? Typically, you have a few lying around your futon, but I haven’t seen any since we started talking again.”

A change of topic was exactly what we needed, and talking about her hobbies would assuredly make her happy. Or so I thought. Instead, her face became redder, and her eyes shifted around the room at random. Had I inadvertently stepped on a landmine just moments after making up with her? Luck really wasn’t on my side.

“Umm… N-normal stuff. Nothing out of the ordinary at all. I’ve just started putting my books away before bed.”

“Uh-huh. So, you wouldn’t mind showing me what you’re currently reading,” I inquired with a sly smirk.

“Sure, but I don’t think you’d be interested in it,” she deflected.

“Is that so? What’s it about,” I pressed.

“It’s a light novel, I’ve gotten into those recently, about two girls,” she answered vaguely.

“Two girls? That do what? Is it a slice of life? A comedy? A love triangle?”

“Y-you could say it’s a romance of some sort,” she stuttered as she became even more embarrassed.

“Can I see it? It would be cool if we read the same books so we could talk about them!”

“N-no, I’d rather not discuss them with you,” she replied immediately.

“Come on, I’m just trying to take interest in your hobbies. Why are you so scared to show me what you’ve been reading?”

“…Fine,” she mumbled before trudging to her room.

A few minutes later, much longer than it should’ve taken to grab a book, she returned with a downcast expression. Since she didn’t outright refuse to show me, I didn’t see the problem with pushing her for more information, but I suddenly felt guilty for pressuring her. However, I didn’t feel so guilty as to tell her that she didn’t need to show me.

“H-here. Don’t read too much into it, okay?”

Her hands were shaking slightly as she held the book out to me. It was shocking to see her so anxious about something, especially when the most emotion I'd seen out of her was when she got embarrassed when I spoke about my body. How could a book be worse than an explicit description of my body?

The moment I read the synopsis on the back, I understood why she was so scared. The book was one that I recognized, since I had read it a few times. As a closet otaku, I consumed all kinds of genres, without many exceptions. Never in my wildest dreams did I ever imagine that the strait-laced, romance adverse Sayaka-chan would be interested in a girl love light novel.

“When did you start reading yuri,” I asked in an unemotional tone.

“Umm… Around the time I realized I preferred that kind of thing. So, a few months ago, I guess,” she admitted bashfully.

“When you say that you prefer this stuff, are you saying you like the stories or romance between girls?”

“R-romance between girls,” she admitted hesitantly. “You’re okay with that, right? I mean, your aunt is a lesbian too.”

What the hell, I thought to myself in surprise. Sayaka-chan is a lesbian!? If I had known that I wouldn’t have been so careless about showing her my body. Wait, that’s not the important part. Her reactions to hearing about and seeing my body make it obvious in retrospect that she likes it! Does this mean I have a chance!?

“O-of course, it’s fine,” I stuttered in a stupor. “But I thought you weren’t interested in romance of any sort.”

“It turns out, I’m not as against it as I thought,” she added. “Does this change things? Like, are you uncomfortable living with me now?”

“Huh? What? No way! Why would I think that? You’re still Sayaka-chan, I don’t think any differently of you. Who you’re attracted doesn’t change anything between us.”

What I said wasn’t at all true, it changed a lot of things, but I couldn’t say that to her face. Her being a lesbian made things a lot easier for me, since it took out a few things I had been uncertain about. Not only wasn’t she as against romance as I thought, but she was also into girls. Who would have guessed that asking her about books would have made me so hopeful?

“Really? The thought that I could be attracted to you doesn’t disgust you?”

“Not at all,” I spat out the moment the words came out of her mouth. “I’ve actually read a lot of girl love stuff, so I have a bunch of books you can borrow, if you want. Oh! Is that why you reacted so oddly when I talked about my body, and you saw my breasts!? Do you think I’m attractive!?”

“………I’m a bit tired. Goodnight.”

She rushed back into her room without answering my questions, which only made me suspect that I was right. Not only was she interested in women, but she was also attracted to me! In my mind, it was only a matter of time until we got together.

However, that may have been wishful thinking.