“ To grow, change is needed. To become the best version of yourself, you must overcome fears and face head on the bad and good that comes with it.”

 

This version of Earth where - now - Nikias lives only ever knew of monarchy, mana flows in the bodies of 70% of the population of Earth in different degrees and here, the presence of gods is also something not only felt but also seen. Every Kingdom or Empire has a patron god, while the god of the sun blesses the Exos Empire, other gods also have their favorites, after all, even if golden mana is something astonishing to see, it isn't the only special kind of mana existent. 

Across the sea from the Exos Empire coast, there is a small but influential place called the Morke Kingdom, a very religious place that only has saints as their Kings. Besides being very influential due to their abundance in mana stones, they're quite recluse and secretive, however even with the most of efforts, they weren't able to avoid a rumor from spreading.

The new King is a Tyrant, a rumor created by the neighboring Kingdom that failed with peace negotiations. But even if people knew that, they couldn't even formulate their own opinions, after all the King was never even seen outside his castle. 

Nikias sighs, leaning back and glancing at his window, the sun is at its high. Nikias and I share the same birthday, right in the middle of spring, he closes his eyes, the Exos Empire has chilly weather even if the sun is burning at its highest. He's attempting to recall information about the fourth and last book of the ‘Odd Eyes' novel, it was an overwhelming book, with deaths happening at every corner and misery sweeping the Empire. Even if the protagonists met a bunch of allies in the duration of the three previous books, no one was as important as him. And there was a reason for that, a human blessed by two gods at the same time, someone born special. Quite the opposite of me, he thinks blinking slowly and staring at the flashy ceiling of his room.

The Morke Kingdom will soon become an Empire by the ruling of a Tyrant. A groan leaves his lips, the man is a complicated character, and of course he didn't think about him at first because he's far away and doesn't appear until later. However, if you think about who would be able to protect Nikias the most, he's the man for the job. How could a book be named after a character that appears for only 50 pages? That was the biggest pet peeve of the readers, how odd was it that the only character with odd eyes was someone way too overpowered and that only appears to fight the boss? He didn't even know the protagonists and appeared when Vremes was about to stop time at full power, the man practically one shot the boss that took four books and four timelines to kill.

Everyone thought the writer was trying to rush the ending, who would've thought that it would be pertinent for their own survival. Well, it is for Nikias right now, not only will the man be the one to kill the ancient god, but he will be able to protect him against anything. His golden eyes drift towards the empty paper, it's his last one, he already wrote sixty letters, none that he was satisfied enough to send to the man. How do one blackmail a god killer into marrying them? However the answer never came to Nikias, hence the failed attempts. Fuck it, he won't cross the ocean just to kill me if he doesn't like my letter, right? Poor Nikias, he has no idea that the man in question would probably do just that.

 

I, Nikias Gregor Chrysl, greet the light of the Morke Kingdom, Lyor Natrix Noir,

Hopefully this letter arrived to you despite the distance between us. I'm aware that you're a busy man yourself and that my reputation may even have reached your ears. However, I wouldn't expect the cavalier of the gods of light and darkness to have prejudice against other fellow humans. That's why I would like for you to attend my coming of age ball tomorrow night, even if you arrive late I'll greet you with my best smile.

You must be wondering why you must attend a mere Prince ball when you're busy planning war against your neighborhood Kingdoms. Oh well, I'm sure discussing everything through letters isn't ideal, but hopefully knowing your full name and the fact that you were chosen by the gods is enough to pick your interest.

After all this isn't only a letter to blackmail you but also to ask for your hand in marriage.

I would be thankful to get an answer in person, otherwise who knows, I might drink with sadness and babble about how a small Kingdom has a King with both the blessings of the goddess of light and darkness within him. Oh no, what would I do if that were to happen?

I'm sure you'll come though, right?

Hope to see you in good health,

With a heavy heart I end this letter with a goodbye and see you soon.

 

The letter was awful, Nikias stares at the paper with anger towards himself, he tried sounding like he was deranged enough to do just what he said he would, however he sounds more like a crazy stalker than anything else. Whatever, this will need to do, he sighs again, it’s not like he has any more papers to use, after all those special papers take weeks to be produced and he just used a bunch of them that ended up on his fireplace. He seals the letter and writes the destinatary, the greatest thing about a world with magic, is that the letters are delivered almost instantly by a mana currier system that uses the mana in the air to basically teleport a letter from one place to the other.

When the man is finally done with sending his letters, he reaches for the other papers on his desk, a report made by Lowe of his assets, this is all mine? He thinks in shock as he reads the more than forty pages of properties listed under Nikias name. If the man wanted he could run away after selling everything and live the rest of his life in luxury. There was a problem, though, it isn’t Nikias himself that administers those assets, its Duke Sawdon, the contract establishes that he can only manage the assets until Nikias comes of age, therefore tomorrow the assets must be returned to the Prince. Something tells me that he’ll try extending the contract, or maybe I won’t be receiving my assets in full. The silver-haired man thinks as he reads the documents carefully, if the previous Nikias was manipulated by that man, that means that he’ll come at him thinking that he’s still the same naive man. 

A knock on the door interrupts the man’s reading, ‘’Enter’’, he says and the door opens with a limping Raphael, already bandaged and clean, accompanying an overweight man of small stature and a lot of facial hair. The man bows to the Prince.

‘’I greet the youngest star of the Empire’’, Nikias nods and the man stands straight again. ‘’I brought your clothes for your coming of age ceremony, my Prince’’, he snaps his fingers and two female assistants enter the room carrying a black garment cover. The man grabs the cover and opens to reveal a set of clothes that really don’t match Nikias at all.

The shirt was plain white made with low-quality materials, the jacket was red and had way too many pearls decorating it, there is even a shoulder cape made of silk with red decorations with the coat of arms of the Empire. The white pants were an even worse sight, besides the lack of proper style, there is even the obvious problem of the low-quality materials used for it, the pearls were opaque and the silk was rough on the hands and felt more like touching sandpaper. 

Nikias thinks about being polite at first, he truly does. ‘’This is, if I may say it myself, a true masterpiece’’. He gave up quite fast, though. 

‘’What the actual fuck?’’ Raphael holds his laugh, even a commoner can tell the poor quality of the clothing, what made the man think that he could simply deceive a Prince that is known to obsess over his appearance more than anything? Maybe the old Nikias could be more passive, but even him wouldn’t let the man get away with such blatant disrespect. ‘’This looks like something a baby would throw up, not designer clothes’’, he gets up from his desk, walking towards the man, who shivers with the Prince’s threatening gaze. In this situation his previously charming eyes now look like the eyes of a predator towards its prey. 

‘’My apologies’’, the man falls onto the ground quite quickly, bowing to the Prince, his whole body shaking with fear. The rumors of the youngest Prince resorting to murder at the sight of an annoyance had already managed to spread at the capital. ‘’I’m afraid I must’ve offended you, your highness’’.

Nikias laughs. ‘’Offended? Not quite’’, he lowers his body for his mouth to reach the other man’s ears. ‘’You see, I was looking for an excuse to practice my sword abilities’’. That's a lie, of course, raising a sword left Nikias wrist sore and he hated the experience, but the man doesn’t need to know that.

‘’Please spare me!’’ he almost screams, the door of Nikias’ room is open so the servants passing by seem to hear the commotion.

A sigh leaves the Prince’s lips, he’s annoyed. There’s a lot on his plate at the moment, he doesn’t even know how to dance or basic etiquette, and now he needs to deal with not only insolent servants but subjects that think they can outsmart him that easily. An anger that wasn’t there before starts boiling inside him. It's so tiring, to live your whole life by being a nobody, suffering in the hands of your family and strangers, and now that you get a second chance… Things are still the same. I wish to be alone, he thinks, his head is spinning and this whole situation is way too overwhelming even to a person with his calm personality. 

He had killed a man just the night prior, and now he’s thinking about killing another. 

‘’Give me one reason to’’, his tone makes clear to anyone that hears, that the man is not only angry, he’s furious. 

‘’We will make you new clothes!’’ One of the women accompanying the designer says, stepping in, her long curly brown hair is similar in color to the man bowing on the ground. She’s probably his daughter. Most businesses at the capital are family-based, so it makes sense that the ones accompanying him would be his daughters. ‘’They’ll be ready by tomorrow before the ball’’, the woman flinches as her green eyes meet Nikias’ golden ones. 

‘’You have until tomorrow afternoon, and don’t use these hideous colors again’’, his anger subsided, but only by a  bit. ‘’I would like black, white and gold as the colors, no capes and no precious stones’’. His tone is clear and the older man now gets up from the ground, his face is red and his eyes are filled with tears. ‘’If you’re going to act like a coward next time, don’t try deceiving a royal’’, Nikias says finally, signaling to Raphael to deal with the rest.

‘’Please, leave, the Prince wishes to rest now’’, Raphael says, his voice seeming hoarse from the injuries he suffered that morning. The women and the man leave quickly, hopefully they won’t cause any more issues. I wonder how the old Nikias dealt with this. He thinks, the sound of the door closing as he sits back at his desk.

‘’My Prince’’, Raphael’s voice catches the silver-haired attention.

‘’Yes?’’

‘’May I ask what you seek at the black market?’’ The question crosses the line, and the servant knows that, however he got hurt and seeing the dangerous looking man managing the black market, he wonders why would a delicate looking Prince searches for such a place. 

Nikias decides to forgo the man’s insolence, after all the mana pact alone already guarantees their loyalty. A bold and loyal servant is better than an obedient traitor.

‘’I’m going to buy a fairy’’, the man answers calmly, Raphael isn’t shocked by the Prince’s answer, if there is something that makes sense for him to buy is a fairy. However, as Raphael was roaming the capital streets he heard a rumor about something quite interesting.

‘’I heard about something while I was in the city’’, he says as he sits at the small table a bit far from Nikias, he doesn’t ask for permission, his leg is already burning with pain. Nikias doesn’t seem to mind, though. Previously the man wouldn’t even stand at the sight of his servants looking comfortable at his presence, but now he seems to not mind even when they act like they’re friends instead of employee and employer. ‘’There’s a rumor circulating that a holy object might be up for auction this time’’.

Holy object? Those are described in the book as relics of the gods, objects used by the gods themselves, most times gifted to their favorite humans, however most are lost in history, some keep those at their homes as displays of the history of their families. The Imperial family has six holy objects, the crown of the Empress and the crown of the Emperor are both relics of the god of the sun and goddess of the moon. There is also the staff of the goddess of the moon, the cloak of the goddess of darkness, the branch of one of the sacred trees of the god of nature and at last the bracelet of the goddess of the moon. All of them were gifts at the birth of the Empire, be it by allies of the first Emperor or the gifts the Empress herself got from the goddess.

‘’Did the rumors got more specific?’’ Nikias asks for a reason, relics are important in the fight against Vremes, the second book had a sort of treasure hunt by secondary characters where they went after important relics, and the sword that Lyor uses against Vremes is a relic made by both the goddess of light and goddess of darkness as a gift to him. 

‘’I couldn’t hear much, but it was something about a book’’, both men stayed silent for a couple seconds. ‘’It could be the book of the god of wisdom’’, Raphael theorizes, however, Nikias recalls a book far more important.

‘’It would be interesting, however if it is Aelius Diary…’’ The diary of the first Emperor, a relic lost in time, he used a special ink made of the tears of the sun god, it's priceless and it could hold a lot of answers. Evangelia never managed to find it, considering that Nikias and Aelius share the same type of mana, the diary could be like striking gold to him.

‘’I’m sorry but I didn’t get much more information, the auction will be three days from now, I’ll try getting more information’’, Nikias shakes his head at Raphael words.

‘’Don’t bother, you already got hurt enough’’.

‘’I can be more useful, your highness’’, the Prince understands why Raphael seems desperate, after all he uses his brother way more and both brothers are trapped by the pact and the fear of going back to the northern tower. However, Raphael’s eagerness isn’t needed.

‘’You’re already useful, Raphael, right now you’ll need to rest, both you and Lowe will be my bodyguards at the ball’’ Nikias doesn’t have the time to talk with his father before the ball, much less finding a loyal guard to protect him, considering the two threats he sent by mail, it isn’t a reach to think that his life could be in danger.

‘’Your what?’’ The man forgot that some terms he’s familiar with don't exist in that world.

‘’It’s something like a guard, however you won’t use weapons’’, the brothers don’t even need weapons as their knowledge of mana is far more extensive than one might imagine at first. ‘’You’ll be by my side all the time as well, not in the corners or shadows like guards’’. It’s safer this way. ‘’Tell Lowe as well, don’t use servant clothes, if you don’t own any black suits, buy one with my money’’, Nikias says, grabbing the papers he stopped reading previously. 

‘’As you wish, my Prince’’, even if Raphael didn’t understand it completely, he agrees with the Prince and leaves the room to do as he was told.

I hope it is Aelius’ Diary… Nikias thinks before concentrating again on the papers in front of him.

 

❥

 

“I'll be escorting my brother tomorrow”, Alkaios words are accompanied by a silky low tone, his office’s lights are off so the room is only illuminated by the moonlight, for a couple seconds the only sound heard is of the ruffling of papers on the man's desk. His pink eyes are dark and mysterious together with the night fall, a man that usually looks kind and composed is now serious and calm. As Crown Prince he decided to take a different approach from his father, looking kind and approachable was his decision, to never make others feel unsettled or scared, however sometimes it is hard to hide your true colors.

“Understood sir”, the knight bows, his red hair glows even in the dark room. “I will establish our men to be undercover at the ball”, worried about his brother, Alkaios ordered his men to watch him at a distance, they can't interfere, only report. As the next Emperor, Alkaios has his own division of knights commanded by his close friend Rainier Bauldry. His division is known as the Silver Crows and are constantly sent to expeditions across the Empire to gather knowledge and strength, it wasn't easy to gather so many talents under him, but after years he finally managed to have somewhat strong and loyal knights.

Part of this is due to Rainier, the redhead was addicted to becoming stronger and was the first to swear his allegiance to Alkaios when they were younger. Even if the man developed annoying feelings towards Evangelia, Alkaios betrothed, he still put his duty first. He'll get over those useless feelings soon, the Prince thinks as he reads the documents at his desk, he isn't happy to do paperwork alone at nightfall, however his advisor was showing signs of betrayal so he'll need to do important paperwork at night for now.

“Did you send the compensation to the family of the knight Nikias murdered?” Alkaios asks as the sound of his pen scratching the paper is heard in the dark room. 

“Yes”, Rainier answers with discomfort, the Prince pretends not to notice the distaste on the man's face. Nothing good will come from it, he thinks.

“And what were the reports on Evangelia?” Alkaios asks, signing a few more papers.

“She seems to be back at the capital, however she didn't reach out yet”, Rainier pushes his hair back with a sigh, all the knights do is stalk Nikias and Evangelia and hunt monsters, when will they do something worthy of their reputation? Rainier would die for Alkaios, that much is granted, but he can't avoid it but feel annoyed every time he is given such orders. He's loyal to the Crown Prince, not the useless one.

Alkaios sighs, closing his eyes and pressing his thumb between his eyebrows, exhausted. “I can't understand what she's doing”, a while ago the woman went missing, she sent a letter to Alkaios saying she would be back, but the man who is completely smitten by her couldn't sit back and watch the woman disappear without a trace. However Evangelia was able to run from every single tail he put on her. “If something is happening can't she just trust me so we can solve it together?” But even if he already said so to her, she continues to shoulder everything alone.

“She was never the type of woman to be tied down”, Rainier says with a laugh, as it is just the two of them, sometimes he forgets to be formal with the man. Alkaios doesn't mind, as long as it is just the two of them, they're childhood friends after all. 

“That's true”, the Crown Prince says, his attention back towards the pile of documents in front of him. “I need a new advisor, but how come every single noble in this Empire is uselessly stupid?” A groan of frustration leaves his lips.

“Maybe you could try searching at the magicians towers?” The redhead’s suggestion isn't all bad, after all, Alkaios himself was more of a magician than a swordsman, even though he's proficient in both. Having a magician as an advisor would be dangerous, though, they will spend a good deal of time with the silver-haired man, and all the secrets he's hiding might come forward.

“I'll think about it”, Alkaios says, but his friend knows better, best friend. There's nothing they don't know about each other, even the weird obsession Alkaios has with his brother and Evangelia, even his hypnotic magic.

“You should talk with your mother”, Rainier argues for the 100th time, but to no avail, again.

Alkaios shakes his head. “No, she thinks that she's the last one with it, it's better to keep it that way”, an Emperor with hypnotic magic will only bring distrust towards those that wish to dethrone him, especially now that Nikias has mana as well. A part of Alkaios is proud of his brother for finally having what he always dreamed of, but another part of him is scared of losing his brother.

“Oh,” the redhead exclaims “The knight that was tailing Nikias was sent to the northeast forest last night. Alkaios attention drifts back towards his friend, his pink eyes shining with danger. Anyone looking closely enough would see the purple rays in his irises. 

“I assume he was dropped there with no weapons or armor”, a punishment for unruly knights that don't leave traces, it was Alkaios favorite method, leaving them to a swarm of monsters with no way of defending themselves. If they're skilled enough they could survive, however most of them were not. The knight that was previously tailing Nikias for three years, failed to report everything that was happening, the treatment the youngest Prince was receiving, the lack of funding, and even the poisoning of the man that Alkaios found out only when Nikias heart had already stopped. Unforgivable. If Nikias hadn't survived, Alkaios would probably kill the man with his own hands, however since the youngest Prince is still alive it isn't necessary.

“Of course”, Rainier isn't happy about Alkaios cruel side, or his gruesome methods, however, he isn't there to question it. Since they were children, the pink eyed boy was already extremely dangerous, he would go as far as torturing his tutors that taught him stuff he already knew and even threatening people to stay away from Nikias. The redhead hates the youngest Prince but also feels sorry for the boy that will never know friendship or love with the controlling brother he has. Even Evangelia can't escape Alkaios obsessive behavior, even though she deals with the man perfectly. They are truly made for each other, Rainier thinks with sadness in his heart.

Alkaios rummages his drawer, grabbing a sealed letter he wrote previously, “Make sure to deliver this to Evangelia before the ball tomorrow, even if we're not going together she needs to start attending Imperial events, as she will soon be my fiance”, he gives the letter to his friend that nods. “You may leave now”.

Rainier bows, leaving in silence, the moment he leaves the room he is met by a silent castle and a figure hidden at the corner of the hallway. As a knight he can't ignore a sign of danger so he unsheathes his sword, calmly walking towards the shadow. When he reaches the suspicious man he points his sword at his neck.

He's met by surprised golden eyes, and there it was the man of the hour. Prince Nikias, the redhead lowers his sword, displeased to see the youngest Prince at that hour, the man is walking with thin exercise clothes and his hair is dripping sweat. Even if Rainier Bauldry hates Nikias' guts, the man's heart skips a beat when his eyes meet his. 

“Oh!” Nikias' expression is one of calm and surprise, he didn't expect to meet someone that late at night, especially considering that knights had a hobby of avoiding him, even with a sword pointed at his neck, he knew that a knight using the family coat of arms wouldn't kill him. A foolish confidence that has a mix of exhaustion and craziness in it. Rainier awaits for the same usual comments, he knows by his information network that Nikias lost part of his memory, he didn't expect the man to forget him, though. At first when they were children, scared of approaching his brother, Nikias tried to approach Rainier, although it was a lot of failed attempts, a lot of disgusted gazes later, Nikias still approaches Rainier with dirty intentions of having a good word put towards his brother.

Even if it is unnecessary. Indeed, Alkaios was already crazy enough about his brother, Nikias didn't need to have more of his attention, not that he'll ever know that. Rainier feels nothing but disgust towards him, it started when Nikias reached a certain age and began to speak badly about commoners and to poison Alkaios. The youngest Prince could be beautiful, however he's completely a waste of oxygen.

“I'm sorry but can you tell me where the room's hallway is?” Nikias' tone is deep, but his expression is soft. He seems to be genuinely lost, even if Rainier doesn't truly believe him.

“Turning left there you'll reach it soon enough”, he points at the corridor behind him, observing the youngest Prince become deep in thought before replying.

“I seem to be walking in circles”, he mumbles low enough that if the night wasn't silent the redhead wouldn't have heard him. “Can you walk me there?” The previous formal tone he used to use with him is gone, his tone is relaxed yet firm. He's talking as if I can't refuse since he's a Prince, Rainier thinks, Nikias never acted that way before, maybe dying truly does that to someone. How much he remembers and how much he doesn't? How can someone's true nature change? He asks himself as he bows slightly and guides the Prince in the dark hallways of the Palace.

The silence only makes the two men more aware of the presence of each other, to Nikias it was an uncomfortable interaction with someone that expressed their disgust so clearly, and to Rainier it was uncomfortable to be in the presence of someone he long decided to be the true evil of the Empire. It's hard to know who's the most idealist, Rainier or Evangelia.

“We're here”, Rainier stops in front of Nikias' room, he looks at the man's eyes again, trying to find a hint that he's faking everything. Who knows he could even have faked dying. The only witnesses to his heart stopping were his shady servants.

“Ok, you can go now”, his words are rude, but his tone is calm. He's not thanking the man because he didn't do so at the goodness of his heart. He did it because he's the youngest Prince, nothing less nothing more. Rainier’s eyes twitch with anger but he doesn't say anything as the Prince enters his room without another word.

“So fucking annoying” he whispers, turning around to meet eyes with another individual. The man is smaller than him, his dark brown hair, black eyes and black clothes makes him blend with the darkness perfectly.

“You should watch your mouth”, the man speaks, Rainier clicks his tongue, by the man's uniform he's one of Nikias' shady servants. He can't tell them apart as they're twins. The servant tilts his head, his eyes are dull and his lips are pursed. “The commander of the Silver Crows needs to learn a bit more etiquette if that's how he treats a royal”.

He doesn't know when to shut up, Rainier thinks, rolling his eyes. “You're lower in rank than me, you're the one that needs to watch his mouth”, the taller man takes a step towards the other, trying to appear more threatening.

“Someone that used to be from the slums shouldn't be saying that”, the condescending tone of the servant puts Rainier on edge. He hates to be reduced to an ex-commoner. The redhead puts his hand on the shoulder of the brunette pushing the man towards the wall.

“Watch it”, he says.

“Or?” The servant doesn't show any sign of being threatened. “You're nothing but the Crown Prince’s dog.” Rainier snorts.

“And you're the scum Prince’s puppy”, he mocks the smaller man with a smirk.

The servant laughs, “I'm more of a courier pigeon than a puppy”, he seems to find the situation amusing. “Can you let me go now? Dog”. The redhead tightens his grip on the man's shoulder, he knows it'll leave a mark and that it must hurt like hell, but the man doesn't back down. I can't kill him, Rainier thinks with hypocrisy, a few minutes prior he was questioning the murders of the Princes. He takes deep breaths, trying to control himself. If he wanted he could've killed this man, yes, he's the one in control, or at least that's what he wishes to think so.

“Which one are you?”

“Excuse me?” the servant is flabbergasted, what type of question is that?

“What's your name?” Rainier repeats himself with a groan.

“It's none of your fucking business”, the redhead analyzes the man's face, under his right eyes there is a mole that catches the man's attention, Maybe his twin won't have it? So he can find a way of differentiating them and finding his name on his own. After all, Rainier isn't the type to let provocations go unanswered.

He laughs with amusement. “I'll find out anyway, enjoy your time, puppy, soon you'll wish to never have crossed my path”, he sounds so threatening that Lowe doesn't want to laugh again. He almost looks cute, thinking he can scare me, the Crown Prince is a thousand times scarier and Nikias is scarier than them combined. The hand on his shoulder is gone and the redhead seems satisfied with what he said. Lowe can't hold back, he isn't the type to make provocations, he used to lower his head, maybe Nikias is starting to rub off on me. 

“I'll be waiting, doggy”, it's hard to hold his smirk as he enters Nikias' room, not turning back to see the redhead's face. I wonder what kind of face he made. Lowe had fun, he knows that he can handle the knight, that's why he provoked him so openly. Lowe is scared of magicians not swordmasters.

 

❥

 

Again Nikias fell asleep at his desk, after returning from his run, Lowe came to see him for more documents of the Prince's assets. They discussed it for two hours before the servant left. Even after being alone, the silver-haired man couldn't fall asleep so he went to work. I'm 18 now, he thought when the first sun rays appeared on the horizon, and together with the sun and his thoughts, sleep came.

He's awakened by Raphael a few minutes before lunch, warm soup and black tea are the only things he had in his stomach until that moment, so when he's summoned to the dining room he's thrilled. “Your mother and brother wish to have lunch with you”, Raphael said and Nikias was quite surprised, however he didn't demonstrate, only got dressed and left with a calm and composed expression.

The buzzing Palace seems to be quiet, the servants that crossed his path didn't look at the Prince, and the silent corridors only showed the protest of the people against the Prince that became one year older. Do they think this childish protest will do them any good? He thinks being hated isn't the issue, the lack of respect is. If he was any more deranged he would've killed them all.

When he arrives at the dining room he sees his mother and brother having a calming conversation. “Good morning mother, brother”, he says with a yawn. “Sorry I didn't sleep well”. He sits next to his mother and in front of his brother.

Nikias' eyes travel through the high variety of food at the table, every single dish there can be eaten with their hands, there isn't even tableware at the table, he turns to his brother.

“Did you do this?” he can't avoid but be touched by the older Prince's actions, something he only mentioned once was taken into consideration, he could even be moved by tears if he wasn't busy trying to figure it out what to eat first.

“Well, maybe”, Alkaios smiles. “It's your birthday after all”, the older man remembered Lowe's comment, how Nikias always awaits for his family but they never come. He would never need to wait again, as at least his brother will forever come to him on his birthday from now on.

The youngest Prince starts eating, and that's the thing about someone that never had sugar or seasoned food before, Nikias starts eating like he hasn't eaten in years. Every new taste brings tears to his eyes, meaty sandwiches, bite sized cakes, macaroons, toasts… he can't have enough, even if his stomach feels like bursting. Like a child that has always starved, he felt like that was the only moment he would be able to eat something like that.

Trauma isn't a joke, he can't even see his own actions, he's unconscious of how he looks to his mother and brother, even the servants stare at the youngest Prince with pity. Commoners that once saw the eyes of starving children at the slums know, their eyes are just like Nikias’ eyes are right now. Despair for food, fear of eating slowly, hands in front of his plate in fear of being taken away, actions that the now 18-year old isn't even aware of.

Alkaios clenches his fist under the table, there are too many eyes there for him to let his anger out. He never saw Nikias eat like that, but when was the last time he saw his brother eat? He was poisoned and died, all he ate until that day were bland soups and watery tea. I want to kill everyone that ever served you, he thinks with pain in his heart, maybe if he was closer to him that wouldn't happen, maybe if he tried harder they could've been closer and Nikias could even consider him his friend and brother. 

The youngest Prince isn't a child anymore, and that makes everything even more hurtful, it's already too late to fix past mistakes, what can they do now? Forego the past and insist on the future? No, ignoring the past is the same as repeating those same mistakes again. Not talking and admitting their own guilt will only harm their relationship further. Alkaios resents his parents for a lot, however the neglect of Nikias is something he can't ever forgive. But aren't I part of such neglect? After all, everyone in the Palace assumed the Crown Prince despised his brother, which made them neglect and mistreat Nikias even more.

Empress Else on the other hand isn't angry at others or questioning her role, she knows what she’d done, she knows her fault, although she's scared, the woman can't bear anymore. The pain inside her heart is all her fault, but her sons deserve to forego their pain that their parents caused. And there isn't anyone that can give them freedom except for her and Magnus.

It's possible to have a different view, ‘they’re adults, it's their responsibility now to come to terms with their past’, ‘their trauma is only theirs to heal’ or even ‘what can you do? Now it's their turn to seek healing’. But a perpetrator ignoring their crimes makes it go away just because the victim learned to live despite it? His parents caused his trauma, he can learn how to continue to live, but the trauma will never be gone while the ones at fault don't give them the closure they need. The process of healing trauma is complicated, as of course one can learn to heal on their own, but it'll never go away. Else grabs Nikias' hand, making the man stop eating, his cheeks full and his eyes filled with despair. “Nikki, would you like some tea too?” The question makes the man stop, he swallows the food and thinks, the realization of what he just had done comes quicker than he wishes it did.

The youngest Prince's cheeks become red with embarrassment, he searches his mother's eyes for a hint of disgust or anger, but finds none. There isn't even pity in her eyes. Love and affection, that's all there is in her eyes, tears come to his eyes but he swallows it up before they can flow through his face. “Yes… mother”, he chokes on the words but replies anyway, he can't even look at his brother or servants face, he's scared of the judgmental eyes. 

The food was just so good that I couldn't… the man thinks, even his hands and neck become red with the amount of embarrassment he's feeling. The Empress serves her own tea to her son, differently from his usual black tea, it's a herbal chamomile tea with lemon, she drinks to help calm her heart and mind as she studies. Nikias takes a sip before hesitating. It's sour but it doesn't taste bad, he thinks, I like black tea more though.

His mom pats his head, “Do you like it?” She asks with a lovely tone. Nikias nods, he wants to eat more, the food was delicious and he doesn't know if he will be able to… Of course he will, though, yes, he isn't on the streets anymore, he isn't there anymore, he isn't Vahe anymore.

There'll be food tomorrow… he tries to convince himself, he feels the urge of putting food in his pockets to eat later, like a child he can't seem to control himself. “Brother, at your ball they'll serve this kind of food too”, with those words Nikias' eyes glow.

“Really?” He asks and can't hide the excitement in his voice. Just after the words left his mouth he opens his eyes with shock, how can he lower his guard so easily? That's how so many children were kidnapped when he wandered the streets after food. Alkaios laughs softly, Nikias pouts for a second before trying to straighten his face again, the Crown Prince smiles brightly at the sight of his brother acting childish for the first time. 

Previously Nikias would be childish, but his behavior was more bratty than innocent, as innocence was something that only those that grew with care could have. Seeing the innocence and pure happiness in his brother's eyes, that's something that helps to heal Alkaios trauma bit by bit. Everyone has ways to deal with their trauma, Alkaios obsession with the happiness of his loves are his.

 

❥

 

“I'm so stuffed”, Nikias comments while laying on his bed. The light humor of the man doesn't go unnoticed by his servants, both Lowe and Raphael watch as the man has a light smile on his face. Lately he's been tense, always on edge, as if he needs to be one step ahead, and now he just looks like a kid that got what he wanted for his birthday.

I wonder what happened at lunch to get his spirits up? Lowe thinks, he glances at his brother who seems to be wondering the same thing. Raphael was worried that Nikias would toss him aside if he didn't show enough service, and if it was a month prior, he would probably think the same, but now? They feel safer, almost as if even if they disappointed the Prince he wouldn't toss them out. How much of this trust is reality and how much is blind faith?

“Oh!” The silver-haired man jumps to sit, he stares at the twins, the smile still on his face. “You guys were saying?” They went to pick Nikias up at his lunch to report news to him.

“Fleuri is coming soon to talk with you”, Lowe says with a serious expression, “He didn't sound very pleased, though”. Nikias becomes deep in thought before speaking again.

“Makes sense that he wouldn’t be, I told him that I think he cheated his way into the Academy and that I was going to request a criminal investigation on him if he didn't come to see me”, he shrugs and the twins stare at him dumbfounded. 

“My Prince, you're quite inconsequential”, Lowe says with a sigh, at this rate he might even ask for a raise, he knows that the Prince will approve it anyway. 

Nikias laughs, making the two men glance at each other with fear in their eyes. “Perhaps I am”, he says. When was it the last time the twins saw the Prince laugh like that? Especially on his birthday.

Lowe opens his mouth to comment about how freaked out he is at that moment but he is interrupted by a knock on the door. Raphael opens the door to check, a voice of an older man is heard. “Excuse me, Sir Fleuri is here to talk with Prince Nikias”, the voice belongs to the Butler of the Palace, he rarely comes to the wing where the Princes’ rooms are, he reports and answers only to the Emperor. Nikias can't recall his name from the novel, he was a character that disappeared after the Emperor went insane.

“He may come in”, Nikias says, walking to his desk, his smile is gone and his eyes are back to the usual bored dull gaze. 

A lean figure enters the Prince's room after a couple minutes, he's tall, his hair is a shiny tone of blonde, his eyes are clear blue, Fleuri has an air of elegance and beauty around him that certainly doesn't match his annoyed and angry expression at the moment. The 20 year old blonde man wears clean clothes that are almost identical to those that Lowe and Raphael use, showing his humble origin clearly. However it isn't something Nikias minds, as his clothes are similar to those he used to wear as Vahe. 

“I greet the second star of the Empire”, his bow is elegant, he doesn't act like someone from the slums. Lowe and Raphael stand next to Nikias, the Prince requested the twins to stay during the meeting. 

“Nice to meet you Fleuri”, Nikias speaks casually, intentionally ignoring the ‘sir’ used before the man's name after the man graduated from the Academy. Fleuri might look elegant, however he certainly doesn't make an effort to hide the anger in his face. Nikias doesn't let the blonde answer to him. “I'll go straight to the point”, he grabs a few papers he put together the night before, a contract he formulated alone based on records he read in books from the Imperial Library. “Sign this”, a direct and disrespectful approach, that's what Nikias decided to go with, and there's a reason for that, he wants to see Fleuri true colors, if you start as enemies you can already claim you saw the worst of each other.

The blonde man grabs the papers and silently reads them, his expressions go from annoyance to anger and finally to disbelief. His eyes say it all, this Prince is completely insane, that's what his eyes show that he's thinking. 

“I won't sign this”, Fleuri says, his voice is like a whisper from the wind, melodical and low, he tosses the papers back at Nikias’ desk, he doesn't seem worried about the consequences of disrespecting a Prince. Lowe feels the urge of cursing the man, but he was advised against by Nikias before, he was warned that this reaction was a possibility.

“May I ask why?” Nikias says, reorganizing the papers the man messed with. 

Fleuri snorts, “You're kidding right?” The Prince's gaze is directed at the blonde again, his golden eyes are fierce, and maybe the youngest Prince isn't as qualified as his brother, or even as knowledgeable. However he has something no one has in this current world, the future. And the novel had an interesting passage about half-bloods.

Those who are born by the mix of human and other species’ blood, tend to avoid attention, they rather hide and spend their lives in seclusion than to gather attention from others. They don't belong among humans or among their other species, they're something else completely different. History erases then, as a shameful side of human desires, a proof that breeding with other species is nothing but a whim of desire.

Children that are known to be halflings can be killed by law, as they defy the laws of nature, however they still exist, and those that can't adapt among humans tend to run away.

Now looking closely at Fleuri, Nikias can understand why he isn't in the novel. First there were clear indications by the author that they were against halflings, even if they were part of the story, the author always made them evil or killed them off a few scenes after they appeared. Readers felt especially wronged after the author introduced other species just to make them slaves for the heroine to save, they were never part of the main story or even important at all.

They were just there to fill the ‘fantasy’ aspect of the story.

Of course that most readers didn't mind, after all they were too caught up on Alkaios and Evangelia’s story, especially considering the heavy focus on gods and other aspects.

“Your existence by itself is a cruel joke, no?” Nikias says coldly, he isn't there to suck up to the man or try to make him feel pity or debt towards him, no, he's there to show Fleuri that he doesn't have a choice but to be by Nikias' side. He's not looking for equal allies, he's looking for subjects. “By nature itself you shouldn't even be born”, the Prince continues, watching Fleuri's expression change to pure horror. He seemed to work hard to hide it, how his long hair hides his ears and his polished appearance, just right to never catch others attention. “Isn't that right?” 

The blonde stares at the Prince, he's frozen in place, waiting to see what his fate will be like. The law forbids halflings from existing, as a way to preserve the integrity of other species, slavery is a crime as well but a lot of nobles indulge in it so… Fleuri clenches his fist but doesn't move. “What do you want?” In order to keep a secret? Nikias could do that for free, not that he's going to.

“Sign the contract, become my advisor and make a mana pact to me, it's not much”, the Prince shrugs, it is too much, but even being way more than necessary, it is a precaution. Fleuri laughs, blood drips from his hand, his nails dig deep into his own skin, the blood when reached the floor fizzles and burns the wood. Cursed blood, Raphael thinks as he watches in silence. There used to be a rumor that elven halflings were blessed,but that's wrong, not only most never survived, the ones that did, lived their whole lives with cursed blood. He could never have mana or children, he can't even let his blood touch others or the curse will spread, just like a disease.

Nikias didn't know that. That information wasn't in the novel, how could it be? Elven halflings were said to not exist. “I'll sign the contract” Fleuri looks at Raphael, the tallest twin flinches. “But I don't have mana, so I can't make the pact”. Those words catch Nikias by surprise.

Raphael bends closer to the Prince and whispers in his ear, “It's true, elven halflings don't have mana, they're mostly cursed”, the confirmation confuses the silver-haired man, but he tries not to show.

“The contract is enough for now then”, he says with a nod. “You'll need to move to the Palace, I'll arrange the rest with my mother”, Nikias gives the paper trying not to come in contact with Fleuri’s bleeding hand, but the blonde reaches with his other hand.

“I must admit, for a stupid Prince you're quite smart”, he isn't sure if what the blonde said is a compliment or an insult, whatever it is, the halfling signs the contract either way. “This won't benefit you as much as you think”. And the man is right, if anyone finds out that he's a halfling, Nikias could answer for it too. To be honest he didn't know that Fleuri was a halfling at first, but even if he is one, his goal doesn't change.

“It doesn't matter, I'm not any noble, is it the law? Let's change it”, he sounds confident but he isn't truly. “My existence by itself already defies the laws of nature, so fuck the other laws as well”, the god of nature is probably contorting in anger hearing those stupid words. 

The blonde man laughs, “you're just as crazy as the rumors say”. Fleuri gives the signed papers back to the Prince, the injury in his hand already healed, he might be cursed but the elven blood still runs in his veins. “If you change the laws, what prevents me from running away?” He asks, raising an eyebrow.

Nikias ponders before answering. “Your job? An advisor for a Prince isn't any job. It is the job”.

“For the Crown Prince? Maybe. For you? Nah, you're hated all over the Empire”.

Lowe wants to interrupt the conversation, defend the Prince even if the blonde’s words are entirely correct, but Raphael beats him to it. “His highness isn't like the rumors, if you think about running away after working with him you'll only prove that your academic qualifications were bought not earned.” Nikias feels touched by the brunette’s words, it's adorable to think that he earned that trust, the truth is, though, that he's still working on it. But since the twins came to the castle they've been taking care of the youngest Prince, so the red flag isn't that red anymore.

“I guess I'll need to see that with my own eyes”, he says before leaving. Nikias sighs, he's already exhausted, he was tense the whole conversation they had. He doesn't need Fleuri, but being called an useless Prince won't do, even if he's used to the disgusted gazes, this new shot in life needs to be different. He was dull at it first, but after spending time with the people around him he noticed that something was changing inside him. He wants to be respected, he wants to live a good, long and fulfilling life. He isn't alone anymore, so life is now starting to become more colorful.