Since I woke up, two undisputable facts have made themselves aware to me. First, Alaric was surely a paranoid workaholic. He spent most of the day at his desk, either scribbling away through paperwork or on video calls with other werewolves. When I first heard the political nature of the call, I quickly tuned it out, choosing to focus on a random book written in the common language which was before me.

When the call ended and Alaric resumed his endless writing, I asked, "Are you okay with me hearing such sensitive information?"

For a while I didn't hear anything, but the continuous scribble of ink on paper. Then the echo of a pen dropping resounded and he looked at me. "It does not concern me how others treat their mates, whether in your native district or mine. However, I am not so weak as to allow my own mate to betray me. Though if you would like to try, you are welcome to. Although this would just be another reason for why your weak mortal mind is in need of rehabilitation."

Sweat mixed with tell-tale goosebumps spread out across my body at the cold and matter-of-fact way he answered me. In an effort to feign nonchalance, I looked down at the book, swinging my bent legs back and force on the bed. At least laying on my stomach gave me the freedom to pretend his words were perfectly ordinary. Yet the more I thought about it, the more improbable it seemed that I'd ever gain the trust of such a man.

Though when I recalled the first night I awoke, I really shouldn't have been surprised. On that evening, I had just emerged from an adjoining bath to find Alaric dressed in simple black pajamas. Laying down on the bed while reading through a spiral binder which was no doubt filled with documents of some sort. For a moment, I just looked at him with his unbound hair, silently cursing him for being pleasing to the eye. This entire situation would have been easier to dismiss if my body found his looks displeasing.

For a moment my eyes lingered on the curve his neck, the shape of his lips and the difference in size between his hands and mine.

He closed the binder with snap, the echo bringing back my sanity. When Alaric looked at me, his eyes were dark, but there was a playful grin on his face. "It's still a few months until the Hunt. Even so, if you find your body in such extreme discomfort, it would still be permissible to practice a bit before the Hunt."

I should have politely declined or said something meek. My head knew it, but before I could control the words, I found myself laughing mockingly. It started as chuckle, but before I knew it broke out into full-blown laughter.

Alaric narrowed his eyes, desire replaced with anger. "Just what is so funny?"

"Discomfort, was it?" Unable to turn back or run away, I looked him straight in the eyes, breaking every rule I had been taught. "My Lord must forgive me, but its just so amusing that you would use me to talk about your own base desires."

To his credit, he neither screamed nor stood up. Rather, his voice was soft and deep as he spoke. "I merely spoke out of concern for your health. Do not believe that I am some weak mortal man, unable to control my base urges until the Hunt. You are aware of what'll happen then, aren't you?"

If I had my way, I will have departed long before that violent rite, but out loud I answered, "It is the ceremony where all the wolves and mates who have been matched meet. It is also the place where each human mate is hunted down and claimed by the wolf who is to be their life-long partner."

He nodded in satisfaction and patted the space to the right of him. "Now, its late and I'm tired. Come here and let us get some rest."

"The Hunt has not yet occurred." I licked my lips. "I have no reason to share your bed."

"While that is true, you have yet to earn my trust."

"I don't understand." It was a lame response, but what else was I supposed to say when I had already taken on an antagonistic position?

"I'll ask you once more: How did you get out of your room?"

I beamed, "A secret."

"And that, Dear Ranna, is why we are sharing a bed." He met my smile, tit for tat. "You are clearly not to be trusted so unless you plan on answering me, come here. Do not make me repeat myself or I will drag you onto the bed myself."

Unwilling to suffer that specific humiliation, I slowly approached the bed. Contrary to my expectations, he again did not shout at me, but merely watched me, sitting like some ancient king upon his high castle. How nice it would be if when I die, it would be before his eyes. Since such a scenario was unlikely though, I'd have to content myself with him finding my corpse. It might be difficult, but something told me I would not be satisfied unless he was the first to discover my body.

When I finally approached the bed, I must have been standing for too long, because Alaric said, "Just what thoughts are moving through that deceitful mind of yours?"

I pushed myself up onto the too-large bed, crawling until there was a safe arm-length distance between us. I then sat on my knees in an effort to appear taller than I actually was before answering him. "Nothing."

"Nothing?" He repeated.

"Nothing."

"I see." He nodded and parted the covers. "Then if that is all. Get under the covers. There is much I need to do before we can return home."

I froze, my eyes nearly popping out of my eyes. "But I never said goodbye to my family."

"If we had met under normal circumstances, you would have. As it is, I will arrange to visit them with you after the Hunt. For now, you can write to them in the morning."

I was unable to control the glare. Naturally, he had no way of knowing about my plan to off myself before the Hunt, but hearing the nonchalant way he decided when I could talk to my parents, Leyla or even my cousins again had my blood boiling. Because of him, I wouldn't get to say goodbye to them. Even if I did manage to live past the Hunt, he would be there watching my every move like I was some prized peacock in a gilded birdcage.

Completely misunderstanding my chaotic feelings, he reached for my hand in what should have been a calming gesture. "I know that things may be hard for you and we met in unusual circumstances, but I swear that it shall only be for a little while. Once we pass this hurdle, we'll have the rest of our lives to sort through everything. As long as you complete your mate duties, I will have no reason to punish you."

My heart beat accelerated and I had to pinch my leg with my free hand to control my breathing. Were those words meant to be comforting? I'm a person. Maybe humans weren't as strong or capable as werewolves, but by God I was a human being. I was not some doll who went left when ordered to go left.

So instead of following my careful plans. Instead of playing the charming and willing mate, trying to gleam any information about his character. Instead of trying to earn his trust. Instead of all the things I should I have done to ensure my freedom, I slipped under the covers and under turned away from him. It took every amount of self control I possessed to not hug my knees into a ball.

For a while he left me like that and then he clapped his hands, turning off the light. Just as I was about to get some sleep, I felt his hand wrap around my waist and his leg push between mine. At first, it increased my goosebumps, but his body temperature was much higher than mine. So against my will and the wishes of my rebellious mind, I slowly slipped into a dreamland, finding comfort in the arms of one who wanted what I could not give him.

This was also the moment the second indisputable fact made itself known to me: If I wanted to preserve my humanity and very sense of self, I needed a way to secure any amount of freedom and carry out my death at the earliest possible time.