Chapter 57: Going to Pied Piper
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Well guys, the poll result is out. The winner is our literal Goddess Kuromi. Hope you enjoy this chapter.

   Now that the joint training won’t be held anytime soon, our schedule’s the same as usual. Going to classes, go back to the dorm, going for grocery shopping every once in a while. You know, the slice-of-life stuff.

   By the time I realized, it’s already the eve of the day when I take someone to go to Pied Piper, the famous ice cream shop. I have too many girlfriends, so they have to compete for the other ticket, one of the two that I got from Saya way before she became my girlfriend.

   It’s a school day, so we went to school as usual. After school’s over, they gather at Sakuya’s room for the competition.

   I didn’t get involved in the competition so that I can’t show favoritism. I don’t even get to know the content of the competition. Sakuya told me that the winner will come over and knock at my door, so I’m chilling by myself at my own room while the competition’s ongoing.

   Previously, the first thing I always do when I got back to my room is doing house chores like sweeping and mopping the floor and dealing with my laundries. Now that Kuromi’s here, she comes by to my room everyday right before she goes to work and handles all those things for me. It’s true that my burden has become lighter, but it also made me much less things to do to pass the time. There’s nothing fun to watch on the television, so I decide to play some game.

   After waiting for around an hour, I finally hear someone knocking on my door.

   I got up from my couch and answer it. The first person I see is honestly the last one I was expecting.

   ‘Greetings, master.’ Kuromi greets me formally.

   ‘...Kuromi? You won the competition?’

   ‘Yes, master. It was a fierce competition, but it was I who emerged as the winner in the end.’

   ‘Hold on, the girls actually let you join the competition?’

   ‘I did refuse as first, but they were most persistent. In the end, I had to join in.’

   ‘What about work? Don’t you have any shift tomorrow?’

   ‘I have received permission to take a day off from my superiors.’

   ‘Is that so? Well, if all of them are fine with it, I guess it’s fine with me.’

   She bows deeply at me. ‘You have my utmost gratitude.’

   ‘By the way, where are they right now?’

   ‘They plan to have a sleepover at Sakuya-sama’s room. I will be joining them as well.’

   ‘A sleepover? Again?’

   ‘They wish to bestow me the knowledge on ways to seduce you.’

   ‘Wait, did you say seduce?’

   ‘Yes. Seduce.’

   We look at each other in silent for a while.

   ‘...Well, have fun in the sleepover.’

   ‘Thank you, master.’

   ‘And try not to get corrupted too much. If Assaf-sensei and/or Sakuya-senpai give you any advice, take it with a pinch of salt.’

   ‘I shall heed your warning.’

   ‘Good. Now, shall we meet up at, say, eight in the morning tomorrow? We’ll go out after eating our breakfast.’

   ‘I have no objections in that arrangement.’

   ‘Well then, see you tomorrow.’

   ‘See you tomorrow, master.’

   With that, Kuromi heads for Sakuya’s room. I may sound calm just now, but secretly I’m panicking. I mean, I barely know Kuromi. Where am I supposed to bring her before and after we’re done with the ice cream? If I don’t think this through, it’ll be like the date with Kaoru all over again, where I had to ask the girl on where to go.

   I spent hours to come up with a plan. In the end, I had to settle with showing her around the city. The plan is pretty half-baked, but it’ll have to do. With that settled, I continue to pass the time all by myself.

   On the next day, Kuromi arrived at my door right on time.

   ‘Good morning, master. Please allow me to clean your room once again.’ she says while bowing.

   ‘Not today, Kuromi.’ I refuse. ‘We’re going outside to have fun, so that’s all we’ll be doing.’

   She tilts her head. ‘What about cooking, master?’

   ‘That’s different. We still have to eat, after all. Now come inside.’

   ‘Yes master.’

   Since I gave her a no-work order, she’s sitting down obediently in front of the counter while I cook up our breakfast.

   The cooking, the eating and the cleaning up all took place in less than an hour. After I get changed into something that I wear when I go outside, it’s finally time for us to head out.

   ‘Before we go outside, I would like to establish a few rules.’ I say to Kuromi.

   ‘What is it, master?’

   ‘First of all, no calling me master. I don’t want to attract unnecessary attention.’

   ‘Well then, shall I call you Akira-sama?’

   ‘No sama either. I’m not a feudal lord.’

   ‘Akira-san, then.’

   ‘Rule number two, change that outfit of yours.’

   She looks down on her maid uniform. ‘But, you love seeing maid uniforms, do you not, Akira-san?’

   ‘I do, but that’s not the point!’

   ‘So you do admit that you like maid uniforms.’

   ‘The point is, that’s something you wear when you work. You’re not working right now, so you should wear something more casual.’

   ‘Understood.’

   She transforms her maid uniform into a white shirt with a picture of a band I’ve never heard of printed on it, a black long-sleeved leather jacket, a black skirt, a pair of black thigh high socks. She’s still wearing her black boots.

   ‘Is this adequate, Akira-san?’ she inquires.

   ‘Good enough. Let’s go, then.’

   ‘Yes.’

   While heading out, I decide to tell her the plan for today.

   ‘You probably don’t know your way around here, so I’ll bring you to all sorts of places today. Is that okay with you?’

   ‘Yes. Thank you for your offer.’

   The tickets allow us to have a seat at the Pied Piper from a period of two o’clock in the afternoon to three o’clock of the same day, so we have lots of time.

   For the first stop, I decide to bring her to the train station.

   ‘If you want to go somewhere far, this is how you travel. I guess you can ride the bus too, but you can avoid traffic congestion if you ride this instead.’ I tell her.

   ‘I see. May I know how this works?’

   ‘Of course. I’ll show you.’

   I bring her to one of the ticket machines and explain this is the machine that allows us to buy tickets. She seems very amazed by all this.

   ‘The last time I was at the surface, humans travel around while riding horses and chariots. They really are impressive.’ she says in absolute awe.

   ‘Well, it has been more than thousands of years, after all. One thing we humans are good at is improving our way of living.’

   ‘On a side note, what is a “bus”?’

   ‘Hold on.’

   I search a picture of a bus on my phone and show it to her.

   ‘It kind of looks like a metallic caterpillar.’ she comments. ‘Caterpillar with strange-looking wheels instead of legs.’

   ‘I don’t know what’s with the weird analogy, but I guess that’s one way to describe it.’

   ‘And this is a “phone”, correct?’ she asks while keep on staring at my phone.

   ‘That’s right. That reminds me, you don’t own a phone, do you?’

   ‘No. I have never found it necessary to own one of these tiny boxes, and I do not think I ever will.’

   ‘Don’t say that. What if you got lost? Come on, let’s go get you one.’

   ‘Well, if you insist…’

   We go to an electronic store and head for the department where they sell phones. Kuromi probably couldn’t cares less about the cameras, so I recommend her to get a smart phone with the most basic functions. After she made her choice, she looks at me with a troubled look.

   ‘Akira-san, I am presented with a predicament.’

   ‘Which is?’

   ‘I have yet to receive my first paycheck from my work. As such, it is impossible for me to make the payment.’

   ‘Oh, is that it? I’ll just pay for you then.’

   ‘You have my gratitude. I shall pay you back the first chance I get.’

   ‘Hey now, when I said that I’ll pay for you, I meant to give it to you as a gift.’

   ‘A gift? But-’

   ‘No buts. We’re on a date, remember? I’m supposed to show you my cool side, you know?’

   ‘Well, if you insist…’

   After we bought the phone, we sit down at a bench in the store so that I could explain to her on its functions. We need to charge it first, so I use my phone to do the job while waiting for its battery to be filled up.

   ‘...and that’s it. If you’re still unsure of something, just refer to the manual.’ I conclude by saying.

   ‘Thank you for your explanation, Akira-san. Just now, you mentioned something about watching videos online. Does it also mean you can listen to music as well?’

   ‘Of course. Just go to Y**tube. They got most of the stuff that you want. Here, try searching it yourself.’ I say while handing Kuromi my phone.

   She begins typing clumsily at the screen. It took her a while to type out the thing she wants.

   ‘Hold it.’ I stop her before she presses the search button and hands her an earphone. ‘We wouldn’t want the music to disrupt others, so use this.’

   I briefs her on how to use it, and she does it exactly as I instructed.

   ‘Would you like to listen as well?’ Kuromi asks while offering one of the earphone.

   I take the earphone and plug it to my right ear. ‘Sure.’

   When she presses play, I immediately felt that my right ear has gone deaf. It’s that loud. I had to take out the earphone before it got damaged permanently.

   I look at the title of the music video. It’s by a band called Korosu Requiem, and the name of the song is called Screaming In Hell. When I look closely, the faces of the band members are exactly the same as the ones printed on Kuromi’s shirt.

   ‘Is this death metal?’

   ‘Yes. Yamada-san, one of my colleague at work, often listens to it while he is working. The songs he listens to are quite to my liking.’

   A Goddess that governs one of the river of the Underworld likes to listen to a band that sings a song about screaming their lungs out in hell. Sounds about right.

   ‘I see. Well, you can listen to all the songs you want once you’re back at your room. Shall we continue with the guide for now?’

   ‘Of course.’

   Before we leave, I explained to her about data plan, and got her to signed up to one of the available plans found at the store.

   ‘Let’s go to the supermarket next.’ I say to Kuromi.

   ‘That is where you always go to buy food, correct?’

   ‘That’s right. And it’s not only food. You can buy lots of other stuff too. Come on. It’s faster to show you.’

   Once there, I give her a simple tour. She’s acting indifferent, but I could tell that she’s marveled by all the modern products which could not be found during ancient Greece. She keeps on asking me questions about them, and I answer each one patiently.

   She also took a a lot of pictures with her phone. She’s so eager to test out the camera that she’s even taking pictures of raw food and detergents.

   Soon it’s time for lunch, so I ask Kuromi what does she want to eat.

   ‘I have no particular interest in any specific cuisine. However, Saya-sama warned me to not go to a place called family restaurants when I am with you.’

   I see that Saya is still traumatized from the time we went to the family restaurant right after the aquarium trip.

   Just as I’m about to tell her that I don’t know where to eat either, we pass by a fast food place.

   ‘You want to try one of these?’ I ask the Goddess while gesturing towards the place.

   Kuromi looks at the restaurant curiously.

   ‘What sort of cuisine does this establishment serves?’

   ‘I guess you could call it western. The only difference is, the food here will be served minutes after you ordered them.’

   Kuromi’s eyes widen in surprise. ‘Minutes, you say? Are the chefs using magic?’

   ‘Not at all. It’s just that they’re mostly food that can be prepared quickly, which is why they’re called fast food.’

   ‘That is most intriguing. I would like to try having a meal here.’

   ‘All right.’

   Since Kuromi has never eaten fast food before, I took the liberty of ordering something for her. As promised, the food we ordered came out almost immediately. I’m glad that we could find ourselves a seat despite today being a Sunday, since Kuromi has a look on her that implies she really can’t wait to try her food and might eat them while remain standing if I let he be.

   She takes a bite of her cheeseburger and chews it slowly to savour the taste. I patiently await her reaction while munching on my own burger.

   ‘...They chose speed and convenience over nutrition, did they not?’ she asks me.

   ‘Oh, you could tell?’

   ‘Yes. After all, I had been eating the food you made, which is the exact opposite. And yours taste much better.’

   She reaches over to her cup which contains cola. I figure I’d give her a warning since like hamburger, it’s probably her first time in drinking a carbonated drink.

   ‘You might want to take it slow when you drink that. It’s fizzy, so you’ll get gas inside you.’ I tell her.

   ‘I thank you for your advice.’

   She takes my warning seriously and takes a sip from the straw slowly. Even so, she still lets out a small burp.

   ‘That was…refreshing. Literally. It has much different taste from the green tea that I usually drink. That said, it tasted good.’

   I was about to tell her that she shouldn’t get used to it since drinking too much of sugary stuff will give her all sorts of diseases until I remembered that she’s an immortal Goddess.

   We finish our food right on time, as it’s about to be two o’clock in the afternoon. We did the cleaning up and leave the fast food place and head for Pied Piper.

   When we got there, I presented our tickets to a waiter, and we got our seat immediately even though the place is pretty much crowded. Talk about efficiency.

   ‘I must say that I am most excited to try this frozen confectionery called ice cream.’ Kuromi says to me while we’re looking at the menu. ‘Everyone was telling me that it has a wonderful taste last night.’

   ‘Well, based on the reaction of other customers, I guess it’s safe to say that the taste will be much better than your average ice cream.’ I predict while looking around.

   ‘That sounds wonderful.’

   I call the waiter over and place our order once we made up our mind on what to order. I got a parfait. For some reason, Kuromi ordered a banana split.

   Before Kuromi starts to eat, she takes a picture of the banana split with her phone. She then starts eating it by slicing a banana with her spoon. Instead of biting it, she starts to lick it while looking at me in a suggestive way.

   Ah. That’s why she ordered a banana split.

   ‘Kuromi, you probably learned that from Sakuya-senpai or Assaf-sensei, but please stop doing it right now. We’re at a public place.’

   Thankfully, she listened. She ate the banana and proceeds to eat one of the three scoops of ice cream. I let out a sigh of relief and continues to eat my parfait.

   This parfait tastes excellent. The only bummer is that it’s fall now, and eating frozen dessert makes your whole body chilly. I don’t know about Kuromi, but I need to drink something warm after we’re done here.

   ‘How’s your banana split, Kuromi? More like, how’s your first bowl of ice cream?’ I ask her.

   ‘It tastes quite good. Would you like to try?’

   ‘Sure. Here, you can try mine too.’

   We each scoop up some ice cream with our spoon and feed each other. Granted, it was a bit awkward to do it at the same time since our dominant hand are different. The moment our spoon reach the other’s mouth, I hear some muffled squeals around the shop. I decide to ignore all those.

   ‘Your ice cream tastes wonderful, Akira-san.’ Kuromi comments.

   ‘Yeah, yours too.’

   We finish our dessert in five minutes. I would love to stay a bit longer, but I don’t want to obstruct their business by continuing to hog the seat, so I ask for the bill.

   Each of our ice cream was very delicious, which is why I’m not really surprised at their price. Let’s just say that I could buy six bento meals with the same amount of money I paid for the ice creams. I don’t mind. Money should be spent like this every once in a while.

   ‘Akira-san, there is somewhere I would like to go.’ Kuromi says to me after we left Pied Piper.

   ‘Sure thing. Do you know the name of the place?’

   ‘I am not very sure. Maria-sama told me that it has the outlook of a castle. I would love to visit one.’

   ‘…Yeah, let’s not go there.’

   ‘Is it somewhere dangerous?’

   ‘In a way, yes. You got anywhere else you want to go?’

   ‘Well…’

   We went to all sorts of places. The church. The park. The shopping district. While walking, we also talked. She mostly asked me about my life as a student of the Academy. In return, I asked her about her work. It seems that she’s enjoying it very much, which makes me glad for her.

   To be honest, just walking around and talking might be a boring date for some people, but Kuromi doesn’t seem to mind one bit. By the time I realized, it’s already nighttime.

   ‘Akira-san, is it fine if we have our dinner at room room as usual? With everyone else?’ Kuromi asks.

   ‘I don’t mind, but is it really okay?’

   ‘Yes, I would much prefer to have meals with everyone.’

   ‘Sure, if that’s what you want.’

   And so, we head back to my room. I made sure to leave a message at the LINE group to call everyone over.

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