Before we go on with “Kuttsukiboshi x Madoka Magica”, let’s stop for a moment and take a bit of a breather. We’re on Chapter 7 and yet the story has barely just begun? What? How long is this thing going to be? Well, dear reader, it will be as long as it wants to be. Will it be longer than the rest of The Madoka Series combined? I certainly hope not, because I have better things to be writing right now than this.

During this little breather, I think I’m going to give you a little backstory. Chapter 6 ended on a bit of a cliffhanger, didn’t it? Well, it’s gonna be a few chapters before we get back to Sheriff Kaname and the crew. Until then, let’s get some new stuff going, shall we?

Okay, you’ve probably been wondering, like we all have for the past 6 chapters, what is the deal with this “Kuttsukiboshi” part of the title of this fan fiction? Well, I’m finally going to give you an answer about the story of two girls, one dude, and a lot of other stuff:

Kuttsukiboshi means Stars Intertwined. This anime is a two-episode OVA, and one that I would not recommend you watch-- ever. No, please. It’s just… Let me tell you the plot. Okay?

At some random-ass high school in Japan, there were two girls. One, Kiiko Kawakami, and the other, Aaya Saito. Kiiko happened to have latent psychic powers of some sort, and after school every day these girls tried to open up these powers. Until one day… They start making out and become girlfriends.

From then on, the anime forgot that it was originally about a girl that is psychic and another girl helping her, and it became an anime about two girls making out and doing other lewd things that would be highly inappropriate to describe in great, excruciating detail in this T-rated fan fiction. And since their school was on summer vacation at the time, they did quite a number of these things.

Kiiko and Aaya stood in front of an ice cream stand. Kiiko began taking some money out of her purse, and turned to Aaya, asking, “What flavor ice cream do you want?”

Aaya smiled and said, “I want it to taste like your--”

This actually happened.

So yeah, I’d like to tell you the rest of the plot to this, but for a while, it’s mostly just a lot of naughty activities. Finally, though, some stuff starts happening. It turns out that Aaya’s older brother is a famous artist prodigy guy. He makes art that’s so popular, even Kiiko knows about it (And yet they still lived in a dingy apartment in the middle of nowhere, which is really sadly typical for artists).

This turned out to be not the best thing for Kiiko, though. She forgot her phone back at Aaya’s house after leaving from a weekend of… certain events… and went back on the train to get it, since that’s the only way the two of them could contact each other during summer break.

But when she got there, the door was locked; apparently, Aaya had already left from her house herself. “I wonder if I could…” Kiiko didn’t even finish her thought before using her powers to open the lock from the inside and get into the apartment.

What she found in that apartment was Aaya, and Aaya’s brother.

They were doing some things that we DEFINITELY cannot mention, sorry to hear.

Though it turns out that they were only doing those things because Aaya’s brother was dying of brain cancer or something, and he conveniently passed away almost immediately afterwards. Only enough time to break Kiiko’s poor, psychic-powered heart.

Aaya decided afterwards, after their relationship had ended and they ceased contact for weeks, that she needed to make it up to Kiiko. And luckily, there was an approaching severe thunderstorm in the forecast. So what did Aaya do? She got some chloroform, knocked Kiiko out, took her to the gym storage shed at the school, and did some things that we WILL NOT MENTION HERE IN THIS STORY.

And it never stops. They both continue to commit acts of relations with each other, and it was at this moment when I realized that this may have been a poor choice for a crossover story in the first place. But as we are already seven chapters in, I can’t exactly change it to “Madoka Magica x Index: The Wrath of Kuroko” this late in the game, so we’ll stick with this poorly-conceived crossover with a bad smut OVA.

But here’s the stinger behind all the stuff that’s been going on since all these re-relations have been re-occuring. Aaya decided to run away and move to America for like, no real reason. Maybe she felt guilty for doing really terrible things constantly and generally being a bad person? Probably. So she and Kiiko fell asleep (after some other stuff), and when Kiiko woke up, she realized that Aaya’s gone, already on a plane and everything.

“Shit,” Kiiko probably said to herself. “Shit!” She started glowing and other super scary psychic stuff… awakening her powers once and for all. She teleported onto the plane and forced Aaya into the bathroom with her.

“You’re never leaving me again, Aaya,” Kiiko said, eyes flared up and all that stuff, holding Aaya up by the neck. “You’re going to love me forever. And if you don’t… I’ll really kill you.”

Kiiko stopped choking her. Aaya hugged her and wiped away some tears. “This is so messed up,” she said. And to that I agree.

So then they warped together to some alien planet, many lightyears away, luckily one that had a breathable atmosphere. And they lived together, happily, for the rest of time…

Except that they were both sociopaths, and one of them had unlocked god-like powers.

The multiverse was not safe whatsoever, and in a certain timeline of Madoka Magica, they learned this fact the hard way. I think you understand where I am going with this, don’t you?

(Don’t watch this anime.)