The next couple of days went pretty smoothly. I wasn’t really a huge presence in the classroom before so I’m not getting too much more attention than I did before. If anything though, this change has helped me open up in class discussions and presentations, with words coming far more naturally than they ever did before. Along with that, my grades had been taking an upward trend lately, which makes sense considering my brain no longer had to compartmentalize the dysphoria 24/7 alongside being a passing student.

My favorite period these days though is choir. Not only because it’s the one class I have with Lily and not only because I get to sing with her in the Soprano section, but because of how beautiful my voice is beginning to sound as I get more and more used to it in a singing context. The camaraderie felt by myself and the other Soprano women is a bonus too, and to be a part of this group rather than the Baritones (no offense meant), felt so right and affirming.

On this specific day, Wednesday, April 10th, before entering class, me and Lily’s friends decided to stop off in the bathroom. Lily said she had to get a textbook out so she wasn’t with our group as we entered the bathroom. Now note, bathrooms had been a hot-button issue in politics where I lived recently, and so that didn’t help my anxiety regarding the situation. Normally I should be really happy to enter a female-only space like this, but some little voice in the back of my head kept telling me I’d be caught and something wrong would happen, despite everything being to the contrary.

Of course, that voice was right, and the worst possible person I could have seen was just finishing up drying her hands.

“Well, if it isn’t the little tranny, eh?” sneered Amber. “and you don’t have your girlfriend to protect you!”

“Amber, please don’t do this” I say exacerbated “I just wanna use the toilet”

“Do you? Then why don’t you use the men’s bathroom?”

Many of Lily’s friends with me raised their eyebrows at this.

“B-b-because I’m a woman?”

“Listen, sweetie, just because you’ve got tits now doesn’t make you a girl. You know that, right?”

“Amber, it’s way more complex than that. I-“

“It doesn’t matter. As a man, you’ve got no right to be in here unless you’re intending to perv on other girls, huh?”

I’d normally be quick to respond but that one sentence destroyed me. Not because it was accurate - it couldn’t be further from the truth - but just the basic assumption that simply by status of who I was, I’d want to abuse, harm or molest other girls. Not only was it a troubling thought, it was even more troubling to know she thought of me in that way.

She…she thought I was a rapist.

And I couldn’t take it anymore. One or two tears fell at first, but it soon became a downpour, as I curled up onto the ground. My brain was elsewhere by now, but if I would have listened in, I would have heard a hell of a conversation. How could someone ever think of me as such a monster?

Amber began by trying to rub salt in the wound “What’s the problem, Leo? Sad that someone’s calling you out-“

Chloe had had enough “What the FUCK, Amber? What’s your deal? Luna and us were literally trying to take a piss and you’re going around blaming our friend of being a pervert? You know whose really the twisted here? You, for thinking Luna would even think about doing that! And for, you know, grabbing her tits. Man, I can’t believe why we were friends with you in the first place…”

“So what, are you gonna take the side of the tra-“

“Stop fucking calling her that! You think you’re doing ‘him’ a service by doing this, all you’ve done is send her into a panic attack - I hope you’re proud of yourself!”

Seeing she was fighting a losing battle, Amber left the bathroom, fuming. A tall dark-skinned girl I’d come to know as Desiree took initiative and followed out behind her “I’m gonna make sure she doesn’t do anything stupid. And snitch on her ass. That ain’t right”.

It was a wonderful gesture, but I wouldn’t have probably known - I was off in my own little world at this point, just looking for anything to grip onto for emotional support. I wanted my girlfriend right now, but she was nowhere to be found, unfortunately.

Thankfully, and perhaps surprisingly, my friend’s friends provided for me in that regard. Sarah bent down to look me in the eye, while Chloe started rubbing my back. Both helped ground me, and…for once I felt loved, and like I belonged. Sarah began the dialogue

“Luna…I’m so sorry you had to deal with that jerk of a girl we used to call a friend…”

“No, no it’s fine” my voice said, trembling “I’m used to-“

“Luna!” she said, in a more curt tone ‘it’s not okay what she did. A girl like you deserves far better”

“Really?

“Yes really, silly girl! Some of us have taken a liking to you, and like any other friend, we don’t want to see another friend get hurt”

“You’re my friends?” I said, my mouth turning into a smile.

“Well, DUH, what did I just say?”

I wrap as many of the girls in a giant hug. Before I know it, all of us are in a group hug, and it’s such an amazing feeling for a former loner like myself. I can’t help but whisper to myself “I finally belong somewhere” before hearing a couple girls in the group “aww” at that. Trying not to let my tears get the best of me, I wiped at my eyes, before making my way back to classes.

— —

After getting home from what was an emotionally tiring day, I lie down on the couch next to my sister, who seems to be watching a pre-recorded episode of one of her favorite shows, when my already difficult day becomes even harder.

After what can’t be more than a few minutes after returning home, a stabbing pain suddenly hits me in my lower mid-section. I quickly and frantically try to think of the cause of this - was it food poisoning? A virus? I lifted my shirt up to see if anything was amiss, and outside of my rumbling stomach, there wasn’t. I then looked under my jeans to make sure and…

Oh god…oh god…

“AIEEEEEEEEEEE!”

“Oh god, sis, is everything okay?” Emma immediately turns off the TV, puts down the remote, and runs towards me, holding my shoulders in her hands.

“Yeah…I think so….but…my tummy hurts! And there’s blood in my panties! I’m scared!” I start shaking.

“No fucking way…”

“What!?” I shout, louder than I intend. God, why am I suddenly so moody? Maybe it’s the pain I’m in…

“Luna…you’re having your first period”.

“I’m…I’m having a period? This blood and emotionality and pain in my tummy is a period?”

“Yeah, kinda sucks, doesn’t it, sis?”

“Well…yeah…” I begin “But it also means I’m a real girl getting things like periods like any other girl would! And of course, the anger from before has already changed to tears - I should probably get used to this.

“Well…” my sister said, seemingly weirded out at how I could be proud to have a period.

“That said…” I sheepishly answer “I would like your help…since you know better!”

You know, I think that struck a chord with her, because as weirdly painful and gross as a period can be, I think she realized it too, in that moment how much alike we’d become in that way, and while I never thought I’d be in this kind of situation, I don’t think she or I resented it all too much.

Motivated, she made her way up to the bathroom in tow, as I followed on her with bated breath.

“Alright, you see this?” she said, pointing to a small bottle of ibuprofen, to which I nod “this is going to help your crampy and painful feelings from down there, alright?” I nod again and immediately gulp down two of the pills, hoping they’ll take effect soon. She then moved on. Now in terms of the blood, you can either use a tampon or a pad”. I wordlessly chose the pad, simply because I didn’t think I was ready to insert a tampon or anything yet. That said, I’d yet to really explore my bits, but that was for another time, when perhaps they weren’t bleeding!

After my sister handed me one of her pads, I applied it to my panties, and redid my clothing, before hopping out of the bathroom, to hear my sis finish her spiel.

“Alright, so that should cover most of it. Stuff like moodiness, I can’t really help with - you just have to learn to cope. Especially with all the sexist boys out there who will assume your anger is all based on your period”, which elicited a giggle out of me.

“Hey uh…thanks sis for helping!” I murmur, awkwardly bumping my index fingers together. “I never learned this stuff growing up”, I say with a tinge of sadness.

She can only sigh and laugh. “You know, I never thought I’d have to teach my younger sibling how to deal with a period”

“I like it though - it means I’m like you in another way!”

My sister can’t resist that, and brings me in for a hug “You’re a real lovable dork, you know that?” she says, while I giggle and the comparison.

— —

Eventually my mom comes home with a bag of groceries a few hours later. “Hey girls, how was your day?”

My sister shouts “Oh fine. Luna had her first period, and I taught her how to deal with that!”. Emma could only help to laugh as she heard the grocery bag fall to the ground and its contents rolled out.