“That’s enough Futaba!” the teacher shouted in an angry voice. “Do you understand the situation you’re in?!”

“Yes sir,” the high school girl responded, staring at the floor with a neutral gaze as he continued to yell at her.

“Look at me when you respond!” She panned her gaze up to meet his. “You assaulted your classmate so badly that she was taken to the hospital! You’re looking at expulsion here, and yet you won’t even apologize!”

“I did nothing wrong, sir,” Futaba replied. “She and her friends were harassing Mikabe in the classroom, and it got annoying so I put an end to it.”

“That doesn’t matter! If such things are happening, you should report it to a teacher! Instead, you took things too far and turned it into a big incident!”

“...”

“When her family gets here, I expect you to apologize sincerely and beg forgiveness from them! I will also be notifying your father of this matter by today’s end.”

“...If you do that, I’ll probably be the one who ends up in the hospital.”

“What was that?!”

“Nothing, sir. I apologize for causing trouble.” Futaba bowed low to the principal, then turned to leave the staff office.

“Futaba! Oi, Futaba get back here! I’m not done with you!” Ignoring his shouts, she grabbed her bag on the way out and entered the hallway, then began walking back towards her classroom while getting lost in her own thoughts.

...It doesn’t matter huh. I guess he never noticed that Mikabe’s bullying was going on for months. Or he doesn’t really care as much as he pretends to.

Futaba closed her eyes, thinking about all the times she saw Mikabe get bullied and harassed by her classmates. There were many times when Mikabe would walk into class wearing her gym uniform because water or other fluids were dumped onto her, or when she walked around in her socks because her shoes had been destroyed. Her desk often had a flower on it, with nasty messages scribbled all over the surface.

Futaba never participated in the bullying, but she never did anything to help either. After all it wasn’t her problem to deal with. The only reason she attacked the ringleader was because she was harassing Mikabe right next to her desk, making it impossible for her to enjoy a quiet morning before classes began.

But look at where that got me. I’ll be lucky to see tomorrow once my dad finds out about this.

Finally reaching her classroom, Futaba slid open the door and walked inside, only to be greeted by a tense atmosphere as all eyes turned towards her instantly. She ignored the stares and simply walked to her desk, the rearmost window seat, and after throwing her bag down and sitting down, turned to stare out of the window.

And as soon as she did, a group of girls appeared next to her desk. It was the friends of the girl she beat up. “I’ll get you back for what you did,” the one in front said. “You thought Mikabe had it bad? Just wait, freak.”

“Yeah? Go right ahead,” Futaba responded, still looking out the window. “But you should make it quick. Something bad might happen if you take too long.”

“What was that?! You threatening me," the girl barked. She reached down and snagged Futaba’s collar, pulling her face to face.

“I didn’t really mean it like that though.”

The girl seemed to take Futaba’s statement as a threat, even though she was only talking about herself just then. “I’ll definitely make you regret this. I’ll fucking kill you!”

“Kill me…?” Futaba’s eyes suddenly changed in response to her words. The intensity in her expression made the girl flinch, but before she could move back her hand had latched onto the side of the girl’s neck in a vice grip. “And just what do you know about killing, huh? Are you stupid? Don’t go making threats you can’t back up, or you might really get killed.”

“Ghhk-?!” Futaba’s finger then dug into the center of the girl’s neck, as if she were trying to pierce her throat with her fingernail. The whole class watched in shock as she choked for several moments until someone latched onto her arm.

“Stop it. Please.” Futaba glanced at who it was that grabbed her, only to see Mikabe gripping her arm with both hands.

“You?” Futaba was visibly confused by the sight of her, but her grip did ease a bit. “As a victim of their bullying, are you okay with letting them off so easily?”

“If you hurt them, you’ll only get in trouble in the end. So just let it go.” Mikabe showed her an innocent smile as she spoke, but Futaba could see that it was a forced expression. Still, she let the girl go as per her wishes.

She coughed for a bit while holding her neck, then turned to glare at the two of them. “I swear it… I’ll make your life a living hell from now on!” she shouted before storming away.

I doubt it. Futaba kept her thoughts to herself though as she turned back to Mikabe, who continued to smile at her.

“By the way, you-”

“Alright, take your seats. I’ll begin class now.” Her words were interrupted as the teacher walked in, and when she looked back to Mikabe, the girl had already moved back towards her seat after one last smile in her direction. With a small shrug, Futaba returned to her seat and continued to stare out of the window.

-----

After school had let out, Futaba found that her shoes had been filled with tacks, and various threatening messages had been drawn on her locker. It seemed that she was now a target of bullying along with Mikabe.

How troublesome… she thought as she pulled the tacks out of her shoes. Her finger was pierced in the process, but she ignored it and continued.

After a long walk, she found herself standing in front of the door to her house. Without making any moves to enter, she stared at the door in silence.

...I wonder if he’s done yet. If I enter in too early, I’ll be stabbed and left to bleed. But if I’m too late, I’ll be strangled until I pass out over and over until he’s satisfied. Futaba’s eyes traveled to the side as she pondered. Then again, if the principal already told him about what I did, I’ll probably be beat to a pulp before anything else. I might really be killed too.

In the end, she waited for five more minutes before deciding to open the door using her key. Immediately, the stench of death assaulted her. Still, it was a familiar scent, such that she didn’t need to cover her nose at it. Instead, she announced her presence by saying in a loud voice, “I’m home.”

As she took her shoes off and walked out of the entrance further into the house, she laid upon an immediate strange sight.

“L-Little… little girl…” A man missing both of his legs and one arm spoke to her from his position on the floor. He reached out his remaining hand towards her weakly. “H-Help… please help…”

Judging from the blood trail coming from downstairs, the man had managed to escape from the basement somehow, and crawled all the way upstairs towards the entrance. If she hadn’t come home at that moment, he may even have escaped.

No, not likely. she thought. He can’t unlock the front door in his state, so he was doomed from the start.

And upon closer inspection, his injuries were much more severe. A few of the fingernails on his remaining hand were missing, his hair looked to be violently ripped out in places, and he was even missing one of his eyes.

“Y-You… Why… Why aren’t you helping me…” The man seemed to grow more and more panicked despite his weak tone as Futaba continued to stare at him quietly with an unchanging expression.

I wonder how long it took for him to make you like this. Did he start this morning and slowly take his time? Or were you brought here recently and quickly tortured?

Futaba crouched down to inspect the man closer, her mind racing with images of how he may have sustained each injury in detail.

“Say… something… please...”

I wonder… what he feels while inflicting such gruesome injuries on other human beings. Is it… fun? Without thinking, her arm began to extend out towards the man’s neck, her gaze hyper-focused on him. I too… want to know what it feels like to kill-

But before her hand could make contact, her face was suddenly struck with a hard object, knocking her to the floor. After a moment of shock, she held the side of her head and looked up to see a familiar face, hidden beneath a surgical mask and hoodie, looming over her and the man with a baseball bat clutched in one hand.

Despite the stinging pain radiating through her face and the look in her father’s sharp, crimson eyes that seemed to confirm her fears that she had arrived a little too late, the one thought to cross her mind in that moment, strangely enough, was that the man didn’t seem to have any injuries that would be inflicted by a baseball bat.

The thought made her chuckle for some reason.

-----

“Gllckhh…! Hcckk…!” Futaba winced as her throat was forcibly contracted by her father’s hands as he held her down on her own bed. With him positioned between her legs holding her down, one might have thought he would abuse her in more ways than just physical, but Futaba had long learned that he wasn’t interested in her in that way.

In fact, she never really understood why it was that he enjoyed causing pain to people in the first place, including his own daughter. He never really seemed to show any pleasure on his face while doing so, but nevertheless never failed to capture and kill several people each day.

He was a serial killer by every definition of the term. Futaba couldn’t remember a time when he wasn’t killing people.

Sometimes when she was really bored she would come to watch him as he worked in his basement. He would never stop her from doing so, but whenever she tried to kill someone herself, he would step in and stop her without telling her why. It always left her confused.

In the midst of her idle thoughts, her consciousness began to slip. Her eyes dulled and rolled back in her head slowly, and her choking came to a quiet stop as her body went limp.

It was the first of many times she was forced to pass out that night. It seemed that her father really had been notified of what happened by the school, as his abuse had become particularly cruel for the first time in a while. In addition to the choking she was beaten, drowned, electrocuted, and ultimately left to starve overnight.

-----

The next morning she woke up to find that her breakfast was already prepared and left on the table, and she ate alone while listening to the agonized screams of her father’s latest victim from the basement. Once she was done she got ready for school and set off while doing her best to hide any obvious wounds on her body.

If someone saw her and suspected she was being abused, not only would that person end up dead shortly after, but she would be forced to move again by her father, which would be troublesome. So she learned that it was best to just keep her wounds hidden from others.

Upon arriving at school, the sight of Mikabe being held against the inside wall of the courtyard by a group of bullies greeted her. Just as she prepared to turn away and ignore it, her eyes happened to meet Mikabe’s, and she suddenly received a bright smile.

Who can make that kind of face while being forced against a wall like that…? Futaba wondered. And just as she did, Mikabe was punched in the stomach by one of the girls, and her smile vanished. Futaba turned away and entered the school as the sound of more punches echoed in the courtyard.

-----

As expected, Mikabe arrived late to class wearing her gym uniform instead of her regular one. She didn’t seem bothered in the slightest though as she took her seat.

“Sensei! Something smells bad!” One of the bullies said a few moments later as she held her nose. The teacher stopped his lecture at her sudden shout, and glanced around the room as more and more people began to agree that an awful smell had appeared.

Futaba smelled it too, and guessed where it was coming from even before the bullies spoke up. “Look look, it’s coming from Mikabe!”

“Eww, she smells like piss! Did someone pee on her or something?”

“Pfft, I bet a cat mistook her for a litter box!” The whole class burst into laughter except for Futaba, and yet Mikabe smiled brightly as if she hadn’t just been humiliated and insulted.

“I’m sorry. I’ll take a few more showers between classes next time to get out the smell.”

“If this is the result of having taken a few showers already, you might as well just give it up.” Another round of laughter. Futaba watched as Mikabe joined in the laughter, but her eyes clearly weren’t smiling.

-----

Futaba gasped, her lungs working to rapidly suck in air during the brief respite after her head was dunked into a mop bucket full of dirty water for minutes on end.

“Ahaha~ Look at her writhe around! She’s just like a fish.”

“Lol, so disgusting. She’s spitting up everywhere.”

A group of four girls were surrounding her in the girls’ bathroom during the lunch period, taking turns holding her head inside of the bucket. Futaba didn’t bother resisting, after having remembered how well it turned out for her last time she lashed out at these girls.

So now I’m being treated like this both at school and at home. At this rate, I really might die.

Her body was still sore from the previous night, so she wasn’t sure she could overpower these girls even if she wanted to. But at the same time, the thought of having to endure this kind of treatment day after day at nearly every waking moment for the rest of her life sounded unappealing.

“...Should I just end it then?”

“Hah? What was that?” The girl gripping a fistful of her hair yanked her up so that they were face to face. “Making threats again? You really don’t know when to quit, do you.”

“Are we finished here? I have something I need to do,” Futaba asked suddenly.

The girl gritted her teeth and let out something like a growl, then shoved Futaba to the ground. After straddling her and pinning her arms down, she pulled out a box cutter and pressed it against Futaba’s neck.

“Oi, are you retarded or something? Do you still not understand the situation you’re in? I. Will. Kill. You!” she barked.

“...Then do it.”

“Eh?”

Futaba’s eyes, which lacked emotion to begin with, seemed especially dull as she continued. “I don’t have anything to live for anyway, so it’s fine if I’m killed. No one would miss me, no one would cry for me, and I’m sure there aren’t many that would even notice I was gone.”

“Y-You… Are you crazy-”

“Probably. But if I was, would that really be my fault?” The matter-of-fact tone in her voice made the girl flinch, her hands suddenly shaking with hesitation. “Or is it the fault of people like you, who target innocent people and break them down little by little, unaware that one day there won’t be anything left to break. When that time comes, what will you do? Once you’ve brought a person to the point where they prefer death over life, will you take responsibility for it?”

“D-” As the surrounding girls glanced around at each other, looking unsettled, the girl straddling Futaba suddenly shouted. “Don’t get cocky! I’m sick of you talking as if you’re superior to others! That kind of attitude-!” The box cutter was raised high into the air by both of her hands. “Don’t look down on me!!”

Futaba remained motionless as the weapon raced down to stab into her face, and motionless still when the sudden blaring of the fire alarm brought it to a halt just short of piercing her left eye. She stared at it silently, the blade reflected in her pupil.

Meanwhile the girls panicked and ran out of the room once they heard the teachers ushering people out. Even the girl pinning Futaba down stood up, sparing her one last glance before leaving with the box cutter in hand.

Futaba, however, didn’t move, and instead continued to lay there on the bathroom floor while staring at the ceiling wordlessly. Slowly, she raised a hand and placed her palm right above her heart.

...Not even a flutter. I guess I really don’t fear death, huh. A strange heaviness weighed on her mind as the realization dawned on her. Can I still even be called human at this point?

In the midst of her thoughts, a pair of footsteps quietly entered the bathroom. Futaba took a guess at who it was even before the person introduced themselves. “Why do you keep helping me?”

“...” Mikabe walked until she was standing just above Futaba’s head, and stared down at her. “You helped me first though.”

“Not because I wanted to. I already said-”

“I know. They were annoying you, right? It had nothing to do with me.” Mikabe showed her another bright smile. “Well I came here to use the bathroom, but they were annoying me. So I put an end to it.”

Futaba couldn’t find a way to respond to that, and instead watched as Mikabe went over to one of the stalls and went inside. A few moments later, she finally stood up and walked over to the mirror to inspect her injuries and wash her face of the dirty mop water.

“...Hey.” Mikabe’s voice from the stall called out to her.

“What?”

“What color do you think my panties are?”

“I don’t care.”

“C’mon, just humor me. What color do you think they are?”

“...” Futaba’s eyes turned to the closed stall through the mirror. For a moment, she imagined Mikabe on the other side, smiling that usual bright smile as she waited for her to respond to her question.

Once again… I have no idea what this person is thinking.

“...White.”

“Ding. That’s correct. Well, not entirely,” Mikabe said, her voice cheerful yet quiet so as to prevent the teachers from finding them. “They used to be white, but now they’re mostly red. They took my pad this morning and threw it into the street.”

“Is that so. Sounds rough,” Futaba responded neutrally as she went back to washing her face.

“I thought I could bear with it until I got home, but then they started hitting me in the stomach,” Mikabe continued. “I didn’t think it would hurt this badly. Even now it feels like someone’s setting off bombs inside of me.”

“...”

“I also heard them talking about bringing a senpai from another school over to have fun with me next time. If I had to guess, I’d say they want to impregnate me and then leave me to deal with the consequences. Well, they might also try and kill the baby too-”

“How can you be so calm?” Futaba suddenly said as she turned around to stare at the stall door.

“...” Though she couldn’t see it, Mikabe was smiling from within the stall. However, the smile wasn't bright, but instead bitter, as if she’d lost not just her will to live, but her life itself already. “Aren’t I the one who should be asking that? Most people would get angry at being drowned in a mop bucket full of dirty water.”

“I was angry.”

“Are you talking to me or yourself when you say that?”

“I-...” Futaba paused when the words she wanted to respond with didn’t come. She had no idea how to reply.

Mikabe seemed to understand that too, as the toilet suddenly flushed before she emerged from the stall and went over to wash her hands. “...Futaba-san. It’s worrying when someone who hasn’t endured even half of what I have can’t even manage a simple smile. Why is that, I wonder?”

“...”

At Futaba’s silence, Mikabe gave her a sideways glance as she continued washing her hands. “Has something traumatizing happened to you? Have you endured so much pain that you’re no longer able to feel anything? That’s the impression I get.”

“...”

“...You know, I think the two of us are rather similar, Futaba-san.” The faucet turned off as she finished up, and she went to grab a paper towel. “Your eyes remind me of mine a long time ago. I noticed it from the first time I saw you during class introductions.” She tossed the paper towel into the trash can and approached Futaba once more, standing close enough that their eyes were level as she folded her hands behind her back. “It’s because we had the same eyes that I can guess what you’re thinking right now. ‘If I die, no one will miss me. No one will cry for me. Not many people would even notice I was gone in the first place.’”

“...What’s your point?” Futaba averted her gaze to the side, but Mikabe clapped both hands on her shoulder, bringing them back into eye contact.

“My point is, I can show you a better way. Meet me behind the school building after classes let out today,” she said before making her way towards the door. Instead of leaving though, she glanced back once. “I promise, you won’t regret it.” With one last bright smile, she left the bathroom and joined the students’ rush to get outside.

“...” Futaba remained behind, silently stewing on their conversation. As far as she could remember, it was the first time in a long time she talked at length with someone her age that didn’t want to hurt her in some way.

The idea was strange. And the person who’d spawned the idea was even stranger.

I really… can’t understand that person.

Futaba reached up to grab the handkerchief that Mikabe had secretly placed on her shoulder when she grabbed her, and after staring at the pink color and flower design on it, carefully brought it up to her face to wipe it dry.

...Smells good.

-----

After a quick investigation, the fire alarm was quickly dismissed as a prank and things returned to normal despite the culprit not being caught.

As the day went on, Futaba found herself continuously under the bullies’ radar. She was tripped numerous times in the hallways, her school books had been torn to shreds, and she’d even had a chalkboard eraser clapped over her head, covering her in chalk dust.

But she endured the treatment all the way until school let out, where she quickly left the classroom and changed out of her school shoes. As she grabbed her bag and prepared to leave, she paused for a moment to consider Mikabe’s offer.

...Forget it. I doubt whatever she has to offer will give me a reason to live. She probably just wants to give me drugs or something anyway. I’ll pass.

The decision wasn’t hard to make at all once she considered the circumstances, and so she chose to leave the school without looking back.

-----

Instead of heading home like usual, Futaba decided to kill some time in town. Since she was going to die anyway, there was no reason to be cautious of how her father would react. She did have a small allowance on her; a portion of whatever her father pilfered off of his victims that was paid to her along with her breakfast every other morning.

And so she decided to play around at various shops until she burned through it all. First was an arcade, but it only took a few tries on a shooter console before she gave up and left. Next she went to karaoke, but after picking a random song she just watched as the words appeared and the music played without singing anything.

Finally she decided to just buy as much food as she could with what she had left and gorge on it all. The meals her father made her each morning weren’t meager by any means and were usually enough to satisfy her, but she couldn’t remember ever eating things like sweets or junk food before. So after filling up two shopping bags with snacks and candy, she decided that she’d wasted enough time and headed towards her final destination.

The station was full of people heading home after a hard day of work or school, but as Futaba stood there among the crowd on the platform, she couldn’t help but feel a sense of isolation. Among everyone there who waited for the next train to come, she was the only person who had no intention to actually board it. Instead, she had entirely different intentions.

She’d walked far enough from her home that she needed to take the train to get back, and it was with that realization that she also realized how troubling it would be to her father if she were to simply die out of nowhere.

That was why she’d made the decision to discard the two bags she got on a bench nearby instead of eating anything, along with a handwritten note asking whomever finds it to bring the bags to her father, as a small token of apology for whatever troubles the death of his daughter would cause him.

Regrets… I can’t say I have any. I’ve always wanted to know what Dad’s face looks like under his mask, or maybe what he sounds like, but those are just idle curiosities of mine. If it’s unanswered questions, then there are too many to count. Why he abused me all that time. Why he kills people. Why he wouldn’t let me kill anyone. What happened to Mom.

And then there’s Mikabe.

After a short wait, the train finally began to appear in the distance. As it began to approach the station, Futaba stepped forward until she was on the edge of the platform. Among the big crowd, no one seemed to notice what she was doing.

Why did she help me those times? Why was she able to smile so easily despite how much she suffered? What did she mean by us being “similar”? And also… What “better way” did she want to show me that time?

But those questions went unanswered, and as the train began to pull into the station, Futaba closed her eyes and walked forward off of the platform without hesitation.

Oh well. Guess I’ll never know.

She didn’t bother putting anymore thought into it and instead let herself go. Even now, she didn’t feel scared in the slightest at the idea that everything would come to an end. Rather, with it came a sense of relief that she would no longer live such a boring and pitiful life being abused at both school and home.

It was almost ironic though. To think her story would end before it even began, and in such a worthless way too. Or perhaps her story had ended long ago, and she was only just now closing the book once and for all. Either way, it was the undeniable truth that Futaba would disappear, destined to be forgotten by those that once knew her.

The thought made her chuckle for some reason.

…

…

…

...Eh?

After a few moments of waiting, Futaba discovered that she was still capable of forming thoughts. In a moment of confusion, she opened her eyes which would have been ripped out of her head from the impact against the front of the train to see that the train had managed to pull into the station without issue, and passengers were currently in the process of boarding.

She herself hadn’t even made it off the platform. But she was sure she’d thrown herself off, so the contradiction of her memories and current state sent her mind into a flux. It wasn’t until a voice called out to her that she snapped out of it.

“...And here I was, going on about how similar we were,” Mikabe said. “I figured simply giving you something to look forward to would keep things like this from happening, but to think you’d actually ignore me and go die on your own.”

“You… how…” Futaba looked back in surprise to see Mikabe holding onto one of her arms. Instead of walking off the platform like she’d intended, it seemed Mikabe had grabbed her and held her in place, allowing the train to pass harmlessly.

“...You must have suffered a lot, huh.” Mikabe’s face was full of sympathy as she continued. “I’ve gone as far as self-harming in the past, but I’ve never tried to kill myself before. The idea of losing everything is too frightening for me.”

“...”

Mikabe gently pulled on Futaba’s arm, bringing her away from the edge of the platform. “Did you even regret not coming to see what I wanted to show you? You should at least deal with any lingering loose ends before doing something like this. Think of the feelings of those you’re blowing off.”

“...Why did you stop me?” Futaba asked. She noticed that Mikabe hadn’t let go of her arm, but decided not to bring it up.

“Why?” Mikabe put a questioning finger to her lips, showing off the note clutched between her middle and ring fingers. “Maybe part of it is because a certain someone forgot to write down her home address, so I had no other way of knowing where to send the bags. Or maybe it’s because that same certain someone forgot to return a certain handkerchief they borrowed.”

“...Oh.”

“But more importantly, I know what you’re going through right now. I’m probably one of the only people in the world who can relate even a little bit to how much you’ve suffered. And it’s because I know what you’re going through that I can say, this isn’t the answer.”

“Eh?”

“What you need is to relieve the stress weighing you down. You’ve let all of your horrible experiences bottle up inside you, and this is the result of that. But if you just find an outlet for those feelings, you’ll find that you can smile no matter how bad things may seem for you.” As if to bring the point home, Mikabe smiled the same bright smile.

“...Are you saying you know a way to relieve stress? I’m not interested in something like a massage.”

“Don’t worry, it’s not anything like that. Actually, there’s this special game made for people like us. Not only can you relieve stress, you can also earn a huge amount of money. 100,000 yen minimum for each round, just for participating. But depending on your success, the potential is even greater.”

“I don’t recall ever hearing of any game like that.”

“Of course not, because it’s a secret game. Do you want to know what it’s called?” Mikabe leaned close, and whispered in her ear, “It’s called-”