Ethan Winters picked up the antique lamp and laughed at just how 70s it looked. His parents were still in diapers when this thing would have been new. He held it in the light and looked for chips or breaks. A little dusty and in need of a new shade, but nothing major. He knew it would be a perfect gift for his dad for Father’s Day.

The old woman behind the register had a facial expression that said I have worked here for decades and no one has ever bought this piece of shit when Ethan stepped up to counter to pay for the lamp. He thought she didn't even want to sell it to him, honestly, though he didn't run into any trouble.

He drove back to his apartment and set the lamp down on the kitchen table. He put it out of his mind as he watched TV and Google Searched on his iPad for something to read to pass the time with. He had three hours until he had to leave for work and knew it would be an annoying day.

The first hour was comprised of TBS reruns of American Dad, about the only Seth MacFarlane show Ethan could still stand. Even so, it was mostly background noise, he’d seen that episode a couple dozen times.

The second hour was when things got interesting.

Ethan got up and walked into the kitchen to grab a soda. He passed the lamp and swore he heard an odd noise. He picked it up and turned it this way and that, upside down and rightside up. Nothing was out of the ordinary, though he still had to clean it up.

So where had that sound come from? Nothing was rolling around inside the lamp when he shook it, nothing else was on the table near it, it was almost as if the sound had come from nowhere. He held the lamp close to his ear.

But the voice wasn't coming from the lamp. “Hi there!” came the voice of a young woman, around Ethan’s age. He looked around for her, but couldn't see anyone or anything. He checked the lamp for a speaker, but found nothing.

Something was… Wrong, for lack of a better term.

“Over here, Master,” the voice said. He was a little disturbed by the Master part, but he followed the voice to its source and saw a very cute face smiling at him from the TV.

Ethan walked over to the TV and saw her eyes tracing his every footstep. “You… Are you…”

“Talking to you? Yes, Master, I am.”

“Why are you calling me that?”

“You bought my lamp. By Djinn law of the Magical Concordance, Page Eight, Section Nineteen, Paragraph Three, I am hereby in your service until you either die or sell my lamp. I can only grant you three wishes per day as dictated by Page Seventeen, Section One, Paragraph Twenty-two. Wish one can be reversed, wish two can be reversed with caveats, and wish three cannot be reversed.”

“You… You’re a genie?” Ethan asked, his voice full of surprise and confusion. Genies were the thing of Disney movies and TV shows that were on reruns when his parents were young, they weren’t real, were they? He stepped closer to the TV. “You’re really a genie?”

She nodded. “Yes, Master, if that’s the term you wish to use. I’m here to grant you the wishes you desire. Now, would you kindly let me out of my lamp?”

Ethan looked down at the lamp in his hands. “How… How do I do that?”

“Just remove the light bulb and say Najwa.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Is that some sort of magic word?”

She giggled. “Sort of. It’s my name.”

Ethan sighed. This sounded crazy, but he was talking to a cute girl inside a TV. Maybe if he did what she asked, he’d wake up and realize he was late for work. This whole thing being a dream would be a kindness.

He unscrewed the bulb, removed the shade and set the lamp down on the floor in front of the TV. He took a deep breath, closed his eyes and said, “Najwa.”

And then nothing happened.

He opened his eyes and saw nothing but static on the TV. He looked down on the floor and saw the lamp. Had he just imagined everything that had just happened?!

“You have so much porn stashed away on here,” she said from behind him. He spun around and there she was, sitting on the couch, holding his iPad. She was dressed in what looked to be a belly dancing outfit, pink and gold with a transparent veil over her face. Her chestnut brown hair was short and framed her face. “Wow, I’ve never had a master with this strong a masturbation habit.”

His eye twitched. “I don’t… I mean I…”

She giggled. “I’m just teasing you, Master.” She set the iPad down on the coffee table and sprung to her feet, stood at attention and then saluted him. “Najwa Djinn, reporting for duty, Master! Please give me your first wish of the day!”

Ethan just stared at her blank-faced. “Do… Do I havta do it now?”

She lowered her hand almost as if she’d been scolded. What’s with her? he thought. “Do you not wish to take advantage of your first wish as soon as possible, Master?”

He scratched at the back of his neck. “I mean… I can’t think of anything to wish for. Do you… Do you have any suggestions?”

She frowned. “I don’t make the wishes, I just grant them, Master.” She put her hands on her hips. Her skirt swished this way and that. “Please, think of something? I want to serve you, and I haven't been out of my lamp in centuries, I need to know if my powers are still sharp.”

Ethan stammered, “O… Okay… Um… Can I… Um… What are the rules again?”

She sighed. “I can only grant you three wishes per day. Wish one can be reversed, wish two can be reversed with caveats, and wish three cannot be reversed.”

“So, if I wish for… Say… Godzilla to attack the city, you can do that and there's no consequences?”

She nodded. “Yes, though I don't know what this Godzilla is. I’ll have to peer inside your mind.”

She stepped around the coffee table and touched Ethan’s head. He watched as her eyes glowed and felt some sort of vibrations radiating from her. Her hand became warm, almost too warm. He tried to move her hand away, but found he couldn't move!

And then he could as she moved her hand away on her own. She shook her head, as if in a trance. “So, Godzilla is a giant lizard monster from Japan. Why do you want it here?”

He shook his head. “No, that was just a… Wait… You’ve been locked away in that lamp for centuries and didn't know what Godzilla was,” he pointed at his iPad, “but you know what porn is and how to use an iPad?”

She turned red. “I’m… It’s a little complicated, now, do you have a wish yet, Master?”

Ethan rubbed at the back of his neck. “Fine, I… Wish my car was newer.”

Her eyes lit up - in the metaphorical, happy sense, not the literal sense from a few moments ago - and she smiled. “Thank you, so much, Master!” She walked over to the window and looked around. “Um… Which one is your car, Master?”

Ethan sighed. “The red Toyota Prius down there.”

“Okay.” She took a deep breath and started to say something in a language he couldn’t understand. Suddenly, wind began to kick up, as if there was a tornado in the middle of the apartment. The lights flickered, the pictures began to fall from the wall, the coffee table was suddenly in mid-air. Ethan tried to back away, but he found he was already up against a wall he didn’t even realize he’d backed against.

The wind intensified, lifting the TV from the entertainment center and ripping its plug from the wall. The couch was thrown back against the wall close to the door, cracking the wall in several places. The window itself cracked, then broke, the wind throwing thin glass shards all around the room. Ethan ducked before several of them hit where his face would have been on the wall.

And as suddenly as it began, the windstorm in his apartment died. He looked up and saw the window and the wall it had been a part of were now gone. Najwa stood there, a smile on her face as she motioned for Ethan to look outside at her handiwork.

“Cuh… Can you... “ he stammered. He needed a second to collect his speech again. “I really wish you’d clean up this mess somehow.”

She smiled wider. “Of course, Master!” She started speaking in that language from before, and the wind once again kicked up. This time, though, the micro-tornado in Ethan’s apartment was spinning the opposite direction, the pieces of wall and glass were all being sucked away from where they’d landed, the furniture moved itself back to where it had been, the TV plugged itself back into the wall.

Ethan stood up again and looked around at his once-again pristine (well, aside from the odd empty pizza box) apartment. “Do… Do you need to make the place go all twister-y?” he asked.

She looked surprised. “Oh… You don’t like that?”

He shook his head. “No.”

“Oh, sorry. My previous Master loved it when I would summon the winds of change to precede a wish. Also, your car is much nicer now.”

Ethan sighed. “Can you just… Don’t use that wind again, please?”

She nodded. “Of course, Master. Now, do you have a third and final wish for today?”

He crossed the room to the window and looked outside. No one seemed to even realize anything had happened, let alone that an apartment had been essentially destroyed by a localized tornado. People were walking around, talking, ignoring everything. “Do your powers change reality in general?”

She nodded. “Oh, yes. By the Magical Concordance, any magical being such as a sorcerer, sorceress, witch, warlock, succubus, magical girl, demon or angel will be immune to the mental effects of my changes, as will you, my Master.”

“So, everyone who knows about my car remembers…” He looked down and saw his car parked along the sidewalk. Where there had once been a red Toyota Prius now sat a significantly newer, considerably more green Dodge Challenger. If This whole situation wasn't already crazy, Ethan thought he’d be going insane.

He laughed. “Now I wish I had a hot date to take around in that thing,” he said.

And immediately regretted the first part. He hadn't meant that as an actual wish at all.

“Ooh, that's a good wish, Master,” Najwa said as she took his hands. “Now, let me see… Ooh, you have several neighbors to pick from.”

“How do you know that?”

“Whenever I touch you like this, I can see limited thoughts. Oh, yes, that one should do.”

Ethan realized just a second too late. “But all my neighbors on this floor are men...”

“No problem, Master!” she said with much glee in her voice as her eyes began to glow and the floor beneath them turned a bright white.

Ethan looked down at the bright white, his head the only part of his body he could move. He watched the light travel up his legs, watched his pants melt away. He felt the hair on his legs burn away, almost painfully so. The light reached his crotch and he wanted to double over in pain as his dick felt as though it was being beaten into him with a hammer. He looked away for just a moment, then looked down again and saw his legs had been replaced by the most gorgeous pair of legs he’d ever seen on a woman, and his crotch was buried in hair that wasn’t even his natural brown but a reddish blonde. His hips were wider, and his ass felt like somebody had plastered a pillow onto it.

The light moved further up his body, shrank his stomach, thinned his waist. He felt his organs being moved, shrunk, changed. His bones shifted size. The light moved up to his chest and suddenly he felt the weight of what he knew had to be breasts. He couldn't tell how large they were, but they felt too heavy for his comfort. His hands and arms shrank, and his fingernails took on a glossy sheen. The light shrank his shoulders, giving his body an almost perfect shape.

The light engulfed his head, now. He felt his face rearrange itself, his lips grew fuller, his eyes wider, his nose shrank and his cheeks puffed out. His skull snapped, cracked, broke, then melted into itself, almost like liquid being poured into a mould. Hair tickled his neck and settled on his shoulders. He heard a high pitched squeak escape his lips, likely his vocal cords tightening and adjusting.

Najwa let go of Ethan’s hands and stepped back. Her mouth was curled into the most cartoony smile he could imagine. “You look PERFECT!” she screamed. “It shouldn’t be too hard for you to get a date now.”

Ethan wanted to hit himself in the face. “Did you need to make me a girl?! Couldn’t you have done it to somebody else?! Or, I dunno, just made a girl appear out of thin air?!” For some reason the idea of actually dating Najwa herself didn’t enter his mind, but he was quite distraught over what had just happened.

She shook her head. “Sorry, Master. I can’t just make a person appear out of thin air, as you suggest, because that would be breaking Rule Thirty-Seven, Section Two, Paragraph Nine of the Magical Concordance. Only God and those bound by Heavenly magic are allowed to do that.”

“God and Heavenly… How many magic people are there?!”

“Oh, lots, Master. And as for why I couldn’t change someone else, I have a certain amount of time to grant your wish before the wish is then erased from existence. If I hadn’t changed you immediately, you could have never wished for the potential for love again. And I can only change someone if I’m near them, as I just did with you.” She stepped forward again and wrapped her arms around Ethan. “Oh, Master, don’t worry! I’ve put all the required feminine knowledge in your brain to help your transition, and I’ll be here in case I forgot anything. Plus, there’s a lot of hunks in this building, so finding a guy shouldn’t be a problem at all!”

Ethan sighed. “You don’t even know if I like guys…”

She patted him on the back. “I took care of that, too, Master!” She took a step back but kept her hands on his shoulders. “You especially like well hung, handsome men.”

He rolled his eyes. “So, basically, you made me any female soap opera character who isn't experimenting with her sexuality.”

“Well… I sorta just mixed my second Master with my own preferences. My second Master liked to wish for well hung guys whenever she was bored, that's why the law about making people appear from thin air exists.”

Ethan was about to say something when he heard a knock on the door. He recognized the (wonderfully deep) voice as belonging to Winston, the guy who lived across the hall from him. “Mia! Did you still need your sink fixed?”

Najwa stepped back and… For lack of better term evaporated back into her lamp. After a moment, she appeared on the TV again. “You may want some clothes on, Master.”

Ethan - or rather, Mia - sighed. She really did need her sink fixed, and Winston was a decent guy. Maybe if he was between girlfriends, she might have a chance with him. After all, Najwa had decided to make this her permanent wish for the day. Mia would need to start adjusting to her attraction to guys sooner or later.

But, she thought, tomorrow, I wish for smaller boobs. These things are too big, even though my mind is adjusted to them.