The four of us woke up bright and early on Monday morning so that we could see Sarah off. Rachael found it especially tricky to get herself mobile, and we were all nursing headaches. Sarah's parents worked full time and couldn't come to get her, so her grandparents had been nice enough to step in. The four of us didn't talk about our home lives too much, but I knew enough to be comfortable that Sarah would be accepted by her family.

The car pulled up and the goodbyes officially commenced. Jordan walked up and gave Sarah a big hug. Then as she stepped back, Rachael caught Sarah's eye and it was all they could do to keep themselves from sobbing on the spot. Any words uttered would surely mean the four of us in absolute hysterics. I had been avoiding direct eye contact thus far, but couldn't look away any longer since it was my turn for a goodbye.

The second our eyes connected, we lost it. We never said anything, but we hugged for what felt like an eternity. Eventually, Sarah's grandfather put a hand on her shoulder indicating that it was time for her to leave and I let go. Sarah took a deep breath and got into the back seat of the car. We knew that this crazy chapter of our lives was really, finally coming to an end as we watched her drive off into the sunrise.

Breakfast was very quiet seeing as how Sarah wasn't here and we were all hungover. We said some goodbyes and headed off into our first classes. Usually, Sarah was in Pre-Calc with me, and it was slowly hitting me that she wasn't there anymore. I drudged through the day until I had made my way up to the therapy wing. I knew I was in for a talk with Olivia on several accounts, and it took all the energy I had to open the door.

Olivia gave me her usual smile as I took my seat.

"So, it’s been a crazy last couple of days hasn't it?" she said.

I nodded slowly, "Yeah, a lot of change all at once," I replied.

"Well first of all, are you experiencing any pain or abnormal feelings now that you're post-op?"

I shook my head no. "Mostly just a bit of adapting to the physical change, but definitely no cause for alarm."

"Well that's good," she said, "how have things been on the social front? I know your roommate left earlier today."

I took a nice breath to assemble myself before answering, since I didn't want to relive anything that might cause me to tear up, "It’s sad, but I'm alright. We've been building to this for a while now, so I've had my time."

Olivia smiled, "Mature as ever I see."

I felt warmth rush to my cheeks as I allowed myself a smile grin.

"I'm really happy to have watched you go through this whole process, Isaac. You've done a marvelous job at adapting even from the first time that I met you."

We both let the silence sit a bit after that.

Olivia broke in, sensitively, "Have you given any thought to a name or pronouns?"

I had, but as was the case the night before, I hadn't settled on anything. As far as pronouns went, it felt odd to accept the full female pronouns, but even more weird to continue using the male ones.

"I've been really brainstorming on the name front, but I really haven't come to any conclusions," I said, "And as far as pronouns... I think I still need another day or two, but I can't really picture myself not using them in the long run."

"That's completely fine. I've known many teens who go through the whole physical process and neglect to decide either until months down the line."

As she said that I finally caught on to something that had been in the back of my head since I arrived.

"Have you always refrained from using gendered pronouns and terms around us?" I asked Olivia.

She let out a chuckle, "Yes. While most aren't as astute as you are, I find it helps soothe any inner tensions and lets you all come to a place of acceptance at your own pace. And I must say, you might be the first to ever actually call me on it."

Now I let out a chuckle. We finished up our session and I headed back to my room. Inside, it was weird. It felt as though all of Sarah's belongings had disappeared, even though I had helped her pack. I climbed up to my bed and took a long nap until I heard a knock on my door for dinner. I peeled out and made my way down.

Another few days went by, and the three of us had gotten used to life with just us. Sarah had been the first to officially leave, but she was slowly being followed by several other girls. By the time that Wednesday rolled around, I realized that I'd have to be saying goodbye to Jordan too. Everything that had felt so slow the week before felt far too fast now.

Jordan was scheduled to leave Friday evening. I knew that since we both lived in the same place and went to the same school that I'd be seeing them again, but it still felt like I was losing them.

We sat down on Thursday and talked about all of our future plans. Jordan mentioned that their parents had begun to accept them. Their dad seemed to be behind them, but their mom was more reticent. They told me they were going to go into home school for the remainder of the semester and would assess whether to merge back into Ravenwood over the winter holidays. I hoped of course that they would choose to go back, but I knew that it had taken long enough for them to accept themself in this hyper-accepting environment and that one like back home might present too much of a challenge for them.

Rachael was headed across the state of course, and I knew that it was unlikely I would get to see her with any regularity. Sarah was like my big sister and Jordan my little one, but Rachael was different, more of an equal. We had been the closest in our transition amongst the gang and we had tended to be on about the same page about most things.

Friday rolled around, and we said our goodbyes to Jordan. While there were less tears than with Sarah, that didn't mean a whole a lot. As seemed to be the trend, Rachael and I watched as Jordan's car pulled out of the long driveway and off the grounds. We made our way up to the dorms and both attempted to keep the spirits up, but it was tough. I helped Rachael start to pack since she only had another week and a half before heading out herself.

We were going through her clothes and assessing what she would bring back with her and what she would end up leaving here. Of course, we ended up taking it to the logical extreme and Rachael was parading around every item of clothing like a fashion show. We both took turns making fun of how old jeans no longer fit, and shirts were really tight around her chest. At one point she was changing out of a pair of pants that were tight around the ankles and it caused her to trip. I did a bit of a cackle and stretched out my arm to help her up. She grabbed my hand and gave me a big grin before yanking me onto the ground.

"That's what you get for laughing!" she teased.

"I'm not the one who tripped over my own feet," I shot back. We continued to laugh for a good bit. On the ground, I could really see her up close in a way that I hadn't done before. Since Sarah's going away party, Rachael had taken up wearing makeup on a regular basis. She had really mastered eye shadow and frequented bright red lipstick. Her face was strikingly beautiful, and I couldn't help but admire her uncovered legs. At this point, I realized that the laughter had died down and that I was staring. I looked away embarrassed, but when I looked back I could swear that she was doing the same to me. Then I realized how crazy this situation was.

Here I was, on the ground in a tank top and running shorts laying next to a girl wearing nothing but an oversized shirt and her underwear. She was clearly realizing the same, but instead of pulling back, she propped herself up on her side. Then she began lean in and close her eyes. At this point, instinct kicked in and I leaned in as well. We got closer to one another until her lips met mine. She held the kiss for a minute, and I let her. A moment passed. I took a breath and she kissed me again. This time my hands gently caressed her sides and things intensified. It dawned on me what was happening. I'd certainly had my share of make-out sessions with Lily and while I couldn't say that I hadn't thought about this, it felt different than before. Of course, even more thoughts started to flash through my head when I thought about Lily. Rachael sensed my apprehension and pulled back.

"I... uh... I didn't mean to--" she stammered, and I cut her off by kissing her on the cheek.

"It was nice," I said. That seemed to break the tension between us. "But I don't know that I'm ready for this, I've still got a bit of figuring out to do."

She smiled. "I understand." She hugged me and we both sat there in a comfortable silence for a minute or two. We both laid back down on the floor staring at the ceiling.

"You're pretty cute you know," she said. I was glad we weren't looking at each other because I hadn't ever blushed in my life as much as I did then. No one besides Lily had ever given me that sort of compliment before, and I couldn't say that it wasn't an amazing feeling.

I giggled, "You're pretty good looking yourself," I replied, "And a really good kisser."

She turned to look at me and gasped ironically before throwing a pile of clothes onto my face. In response, I gasped back and threw the pile of clothes at her. We both broke down into fits of laughter. I began to realize how late it was, so I started to get up and make my way to the door when Rachael's voice gave me pause.

"Isaac... Will you stay the night with me?" she asked.

I turned to meet her eyes and smiled. "Of course... But no kissing," I jested.

"Can't make any promises," she said throwing her hands up.

I laughed and rolled my eyes. Since it was a weekend and only the two of us were left, we talked for hours upon hours. I could swear the sun was rising by the time she finally drifted off. She had her arm draped over me and I had my head nestled on her shoulder. I could feel each breath she took as I slowly drifted off to sleep.