A poorly hung clock teetered on the wall, doing its best to let people know it was almost midnight. Its struggle was not helped by Dani’s constant pacing through the living room, her steps heavy with worry.

I hope he’s okay. He better be okay. God, this is all my fault.

She walked circles around the room, occasionally veering into the kitchen to sip some water. Simon altered between sitting on the couch and standing up to stretch while he typed away on his phone. Every now and then one of them would say something, either Dani expressing more concern or Simon letting her know who he was texting to try and find out any information as to Ryan’s whereabouts.

So far, they knew two things: Ryan woke up and left in the morning like he usually did for work, and that Ryan called off of work.

“Has Elliot said anything, yet?” Dani asked, leaning over the couch, gripping the edge as if the floor had a current that would pull her along if she let go.

Simon shook his head. “I’ll let you know when he does. It’s been less than thirty minutes, you have to be patient. Not everyone else is on high alert and checking their phone constantly. They probably don’t know anything is even wrong.”

“I can’t just be patient, are you serious?” Dani stressed her words seemingly at random. “I’m worried about him, I actually care!”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Simon spoke firmly as he stood up. “You think I don’t care too?”

Dani threw her hands up and turned away from him. “Seems like it. You’re always talking so terribly about him, and I know you’re upset that we’re dating.”

“Hey,” Simon said with unfamiliar anger in his voice. “I know you’re stressed, so I’ll let that slide this once, but don’t say stuff like that. I’m worried about Ryan too, I don’t want anything bad to happen to him. But losing our minds isn’t going to help us figure out what’s going on.”

Dani toyed with one of the studs in her earlobe, still getting used to its presence. As she twisted it around, she already felt guilty for what she had said.

“...Sorry. You’re right.” She remained facing the kitchen while she spoke. “I just don’t know what to do while we wait. What if something really bad happened? Or, what if it’s my fault.” Her last sentence trailed off and was barely spoken aloud.

She could hear Simon step toward her. His steps were relaxed like they usually were, and she hoped his anger had already died down upon her apology.

I can’t be lashing out like that. Simon’s one of the only people that cares about me on this planet, I shouldn’t give him a reason to stop.

“It’s alright,” Simon said. He must have only been a few feet behind her. “You should go lie down or something, I’ll come let you know the moment I hear anything.”

Still without looking at Simon, out of pure embarrassment for her outburst, Dani went to her room and flopped onto her bed without bothering to turn on the light. Her mattress creaked as she pressed her face against her pillow and tried to forget about Ryan’s disappearance.

It didn’t work.

She pulled out her phone and looked at the texts she had already sent him.

Busy day at work?

Roads are icy, drive safe!

Hope everything is alright…

Those were sent throughout the day, with a multitude of missed calls in between. Her calls didn’t even ring, they immediately asked for her to record a voice message.

Either his phone really is dead, or he turned it off, she thought. Maybe I should have texted nicer things, everything I said was dumb and boring.

Dani thought of what she might say to him if he did look at his phone. If she should apologize for being forward the night before, if she should be worried about a car crash, or if she should yell at him for scaring her the way he was. She got to typing.

***

Two knocks on Dani’s open door alerted her to Simon standing in the doorway. “Elliot and Amy both responded. They haven’t seen Ryan, or even heard from him since yesterday.”

Though it was no surprise, Dani still felt disappointed with the news. She had just hit send on the few text messages she had written for Ryan and was feeling hopeful when the reality of the situation hit her again.

“Makes sense. He clearly doesn’t want to talk to anyone.” She dropped her head back on her pillow.

“I do have his dad’s number. I could see if he knows anything, but…” Simon tapped his foot on the floor and his finger on the doorframe. “I doubt that would do anything but cause more trouble.”

Dani did her best to mumble in agreement, though her pillow muffled nearly all of the sound. She hated how fast everything had become terrible. A day earlier she finally found herself feeling good about work, about her brothers, about Simon, and especially about Ryan. And now none of it felt important.

I bet I grossed him out yesterday. That’s why he vanished. He realized I’m–

“I’m gonna go make a little food. I doubt either of us will get any sleep. I’ll let you know when it’s ready.” Simon’s footsteps disappeared down the hall until Dani could hear him moving around in the kitchen.

Guess I have to eat if I’m going to stay up. Maybe I should help Simon.

She rolled over and planted her feet on the floor, before checking her phone. Of course, Ryan had not replied in the minute she had been looking away. Though, it did give her an idea.

Rachel always finds a way to cheer me up. I should call her.

Her thumb moved on its own to her contacts until it was over the call button by Rachel’s name.

Oh God, it’s almost one in the morning. Never mind, maybe…

She pressed call. Rachel usually stayed up late, anyway.

After two rings Dani felt guilty. I shouldn’t make her worry alongside me. And what if she went to bed early and I’m waking her up! Then she–

“Hello?” Rachel’s voice came through loud and clear with no hint of exhaustion.

Dani cleared her throat and made sure she was speaking in her trained voice. Even though each day it became easier and more natural to her, she was in a bad mood and didn’t want to slip up. “Hey, Rachel. It’s Dani.”

“Yeah, hi. What’s up? Can’t sleep? I’m struggling myself.”

“Oh no!” Dani walked to her door and shut it, realizing that Simon might have been able to overhear. “I didn’t wake you up, right?”

“No, no, don’t worry. I still haven’t changed out of my jeans from working yet.”

“Okay, good. So, is work… going well?” Dani found it difficult to jump into her real reason for calling. Rachel seemed to catch on.

“It’s not bad, I guess. But why did you call? Were you that curious, at twelve-thirty eight in the morning, about how fun it is to drive food around to people? C’mon, tell me. Is something wrong?”

Dani faintly smiled at how silly the whole situation was before remembering why she had called.. “It’s Ryan. He kind of, like, hasn’t been heard from all day. No work, no friends. Nobody knows where he is or what he’s doing.” Despite doing her best, her voice broke while she explained.

“Seriously?” A nervous laugh came from Rachel’s end. “Like you’re sure he’s not out drinking or something? Or he forgot to mention a doctor’s appointment, or–”

“We’re sure.” Dani wandered her messy room, kicking at her pile of dirty laundry. “And honestly, I’m freaking out. I don’t know if it was something I said to him, or if he got in a wreck, or what. And… It’s funny, I called hoping you would calm me down and talk some sense into me but here I am, borderline hysterical, and–”

“I’m on my way over.” The phone beeped and the call ended.

First Simon and now Rachel. I’m just forcing everyone to come comfort me.

Dani tried to ignore her thoughts and wiped away the few tears tickling her cheek.