2am. I guess it was the very late hour I stayed up as of today.  I resisted the rumbling of my stomach and stings coming from the stab wound and some other gashes I’ve got from those troops in patrol. It was cold in here. Dark and lonely as it was, I’d still have the guts to talk. There at the wall stared blankly and I began to let out my mentally deranged self now since no one would judge me ever again. 

“Hey wall? Or something’... We’ve met again. The same wall who collided with my little head. I’m sorry if you’ll get to witness my suffering again”

Only the silence answered my silly question. I talked all by myself all night and starved myself to death. I’d just have to wait for it. 

“How about playing a game? A writing game? Where I can write to you whatever I wanted and you will listen to my every cry.”

“Yeah? Thank you! I’ll just get the can of spray paint over there and let me put some designs on ya.”

Barefooted I went across the room to reach for the black paint. And on a rotten desk near it, a familiar pill bottle lied.

“Hi again. Nice to see you again happy pills. May I take you with me for a game?”

I just heard a whisper of the wind and answered, “Yes”.

“Well, I’m glad how willing y’all are to accompany me with my last mission” I took the bottle and hovered near the big wall.

I realised that I was getting nuts. Yeah! I WAS INSANE. LIKE TERRIBLY INSANE.

It’s hell in here. Alone with my demons and gigantic shadows came to play my last game, ‘A game of death’.

“Wall? I’ll start now, ight? I hope this ends well with no one wishing to bother us.” I breathed heavily and started vandalising. 

The paint stained my arms and clothes, yet I didn’t care. I went from left to right and never cared about my bruised fists. My hands were black with paint, I wiped them all over my clothes and some of the dye coloured my face. I already considered myself as a big mess.

I shrieked as I shook and pressed the can. Laughed when I heard the wind giggling. Cried every time my memories visited as nightmares and that I couldn’t sleep. I ain’t feeling any sign of lethargy at all.

“Thanks for staying my last night with me.” I hugged the wet-painted wall and swallowed three pills.

“I never knew that Aaliyah would do such things to me. I loved her as my very best friend and I treated her as my only family. I thought I wasn’t alone even after my family was murdered in front of me. But why would you do this to me, Aaliyah? What have I done to make you betray me?” Then my meter began to create a sound. Anytime, I’d fall and have another seizure. But this time, no one’s here to save me. All locked up in here and that no one cared. I’d die with a purpose, maybe eliminating myself would let this world in peace. Maybe I was the only reason why the wicked couldn’t be wiped out in this world.

I don’t care about my fucking mission with Zedd anymore. It’s better if he’s gonna stay with his family and never go against them. I know how much he loves his dad, that's why he couldn’t give him up for me.

“Zedd, you have assured me… Y-you’ve assured that you’ll never leave me, that you’ll l-love me no m-matter what. Yet, here I am all alone after you drove me away. I’m sorry if you’re sandwiched throughout my plans… Don’t worry, you won’t suffer from it anymore.” I swallowed another five and the beeping cried on louder. 

“GO FUCKING SHUT IT!! YOU’RE NOT EVEN HELPING!!” I threw my pulse watch on the ground and smashed my head real hard right on the wall. Although I’ve used up all of my strength to create a huge impact, I felt so numb. Maybe it was the pill.

Dizzy, I fell on the floor. “Come on! Just end me please. I don’t want him to see me alive again.”

My head was cut open and bled spreading on my face. However, I felt nothing. I seemed numb. The drug helped me after all… Aaliyah and Krypton’s plans were useful after all.

Lastly, I wrote my final words on the wall. This time, I used my thick, crimson blood. I could hear my heart panicking to get oxygen. I couldn’t manage to speak anymore. Slowly, I’d die but it’ll be worth it for everyone’s sake.

On the cold floor where I lied, I swallowed the pills without counting them anymore. What’s the point anyway? I’m dying after all.

Maybe this was really the end of it all. I was so happy meeting you, Zedd. But right now, I need to say goodbye.

Before I could close my eyes. I saw a flashing light and a woman wearing a lab coat. 

*white noise*