Cat

 

From a whirling hole forming atop the uncanny clouds we stand on, Waywright’s pompous voice booms through the skies around us, the witch rising from her summoning circle so far away from us before dusting clouds off of herself with irritation, carefully avoiding her bandaged chest.

“Oh, I tire so of your meddling antics…” Inkton begins, her forced grin unable to hide the frustration in her voice nor behind her crossed arms. “Time and time again, you best these otherworldly generals, even befriending them! How so incredibly irritating you all are!!”

I cross my arms and shake my head. “So, what, you’ve come to deal with us yourself? Don’t you remember how well that worked for you last time? Even with the help of three powerful Radiants?”

Yet she laughs, her mad chortles echoing through the sky as she throws her head back. “Oh, I’ll have my way with each and every single one of you! Even the human you’ve brainwashed into your ranks… You will ALL know divine punishment, even if I must call upon an army to do so!”

The witch throws her arms up and to the sides, her disheveled, unkempt hair flowing with them as her desperation becomes clear, as does that power making itself known behind her. From the clouds, what appear to be shards of stained glass begin to rise. From those shards, walls form, rising and turning, a shimmering glassy sound shaking the entire field. Soon, the foundation of a giant throne takes form, standing as tall as a skyscraper, the colours constantly shifting from dull blues to chromatic whites. The back and seat of the throne begins to push outward, forming something new made from the same stained glass. This shape splits free from the throne, becoming its own being resembling something vaguely human. Sitting down, they’re just as tall as the throne itself. Their entire body is featureless aside from the creases separating each shard of glass, as well as the polygonal mouth that takes up their entire face.

“METATRON!!” Waywright screeches, “ON THIS FATEFUL NIGHT, I BRING FORTH SINNERS!!”

The glass giant sits still, completely motionless as the clouds at the base of their throne begin to waver. The clouds begin rising and shaping themselves into wings, thousands of them, each group of six carrying with it an orb of light that is quickly covered by feathers. An entire army of Seraphim. It’s only once they’ve all fully taken form that an eerie sensation pierces through me, like the sky itself has eyes staring straight through me.

“THOSE WHO WOULD TARNISH THE IMAGE OF THE GREAT LIGHT ABOVE ALL.” Their voice carries a weight that makes my heart sink into the depths of my soul, as if pushing my will itself back. “TREMBLE BEFORE THIS HOLY LIGHT.”

Even Waywright seems unnerved by the sheer power within Metatron’s voice, shuddering yet remaining firm in her stance, grabbing her staff and summoning her thralls to her side just as she did before.

“DO YOU SEE NOW THE HOLY WRATH YOU’VE WROUGHT UPON YOURSELVES?!” the witch shouts. “GIVE UP!! YOU’RE PETTY CRIMINALS SWAYED BY THE UNNATURAL LIGHT OF A FALSE GODDESS!! DON’T THROW YOUR LIVES AWAY FOR ONE WHO WOULD NOT DO THE SAME FOR YOU!!”

A shiver runs down my spine.

“...Y’know, I think she has something of a point…” I mutter, the rest of the team looking at me, Sue-Zee with concern, Fox in shock, and Niamh in disappointment. “Look, as kind as she is to some of you, as good of a deed as ending this feud would be, we’re being sent up against an army of angels and the Voice of God themselves! And with what did the goddess equip us with?!”

Fox moves as if huffing, while the snake bites her lip and looks behind us.

“...Fleeing is an option,” Niamh repeats from earlier.

“But then what happens?!” Sue cries out. “We just let that army of angels descend upon the city and kill any Ascended they see?!”

Fox mirrors their concern, nodding in agreement. Ugh, goddammit you three…

“What plan do we have, then?” I ask, hoping our lack of power compared to Metatron’s might dissuade them from throwing their lives away.

“I’ve gots you a plan right here, chumps!”

 

Oh of fucking course.

All of us turn around and stare at the edge of the clouds behind us as a feathered shadow carrying a pair of shadows in his talons rises up and swoops down, dropping his passengers down next to us. The darkness cast around their bodies disperses, though keeping a faint shade around their heads, revealing…

“The Rosesteins?!”

Anne gives me a wave while Brianna crawls around her and onto her back.

“Sorry, everybody, the wife here just couldn’t keep her eyes off you!”

“Th-they’re all suspicious!” the kobold yips, only for her wife to reach up and pat her.

“She just couldn’t pass up an opportunity to try and one up you at this and show you what she’s made of. Don’t worry about us! I can assure you, my little lizard miss here keeps us well protected!”

Jay lands next to those two afterwards, straightening out his non-existent tie and giving his feathery tail a flap from under his cloak.

“I’m working off the clock here, folks, this one better cough up something real pretty.”

“Of all the times to show you actually care,” I quip, punching the bird in the shoulder.

“Hey, hey, hey! I can get you targeted by more than just the cops, pal! Besides, ain’t like I’m the last one to show up, you’ve got more friends than me. Not that I’m actually your friend.”

I tilt my head at the bird, only to find more folks being flown in! Hazar rises with his buzzing bug wings, landing with a tired sigh as the plant girl we’d seen on our night out in the city hops off his back! What was her name again…?

“I am Bomba,” she answers without me even asking as she rolls in next to us.

Bomba throws open one of her books and brandishes an ax much too big for her, yet she hauls it over her shoulder without breaking a sweat! In contrast to her muted enthusiasm, Hazar shakes his head with open frustration.

“I’m no fighter, but I can keep people safe at least. This young one here had been watching you since you all got to town, and she was more than keen on keeping that eye on you still.”

Finally, Rocket soars in as well, dropping off… Oh…

The moment the puppet hits the clouds, Annette leaps for Fox, hugging her tight and glaring at the witch at the same time. My partner hugs her back, confused but pleased as she looks to the bird who brought her here.

“This one showed up in town as soon as you all started going up, and she was about to explode unless I took her with you. I’m guessing you all know each other…?”

I roll my eyes and give Rocket a nod, looking to Niamh at last, the snake grinning something fierce before looking back at me.

“This is the plan, my dear.”

I groan and look back to the battle ahead of us. An entire army of angels, magical thralls, a witch, and the Voice of God, versus seven Ascended, two robotics experts, a weather snake, a doll, and a baker.

“Are you sure this will be enough?”

My question prompts Niamh to laugh, shaking her head as her gaze follows mine towards the angels.

“You’ve never seen a group of Ascended folk putting their might together, have you?” The snake asks, spreading her wings and taking off upwards before looking down at me and winking. “I think it’s about time you see just what you’re capable of, kitten~”

Before I can even begin to question Niamh, Bomba has already begun charging in silently, ax raised and beginning the battle, everyone rushing in behind her.

 

The plant girl leaps forward, throwing her weight towards the army approaching and flinging her ax with a spin, the weapon lodging itself into the wings of a seraph before vine-like chains form between her and the enemy. Before the girl takes another action, Hazar swipes his scythe upwards, the motion causing vines and roots to rise from the clouds and form a bird-house like structure for the girl to stand on and then protect her like a bunker. Bomba hauls the chain towards us, sending the angel careening into the plant house that breaks but takes the brunt of the wing’s impact. Before the plant girl can even pull out her blade, however, Anne had begun charging towards it, Brianna cheering her on from atop her back.

“SHOW ‘EM HELL, HONEY!!”

A glowing aura of power surrounds the baker as she reels her fist back and BAM!! A single punch sends the glowing orb inside the seraph flying way into the distance, their wings  exploding into a flurry of feathers. We all stop for a moment and stare in awe at Anne, who turns and looks at us with a shrug.

“Love’s a powerful thing, isn’t it?”

Multiple eye rolls are had before our march continues, Jay and Rocket speeding ahead and flying directly into angels at incredible speeds. While Rocket soars directly into them with wings and beak aflame, burning brighter the faster he goes, Jay swoops down below before ascending into them, sharp shadows following him and striking his target. He then dives back down, the shadows coating his body as he stomps an angel and flies away. The shadows remain before exploding into a burst of darkness. Their attacks help to push the seraphim around, singling them out before the birds return to the group where Niamh tends to any damage they took from contact with the enemy.

While our allies pick off angels, Fox and Annette stay close together, weaving about the static thralls of Waywright. The doll stabs as soon as she’s behind any of them, a single hit forcing them into a static explosion, though it’d seem Fox is having trouble with her magic. Instead of relying on that, she whips out her grappling hook, throwing its claw at TV heads before rounding them up with its rope, dashing about them and looking to me. I nod at my partner and smirk, digging my paws into the clouds and grunting as I haul up a jumbo sized TV, smacking it in the back as its display shoots out rays of heat.

“How ‘bout a taste of your own medicine?!”

Annette and Fox dive out of the way as I make my quip, the heat gradually becoming too much for the thralls as they explode in a marvelous display of lights. I then throw the entire TV, Fox catching on quick and rounding up another group, only to find herself being struck in the back…! And poof. Just as a group of thralls are forced together and the TV explodes over them, Fox simply disappears into a windy gust of smoke before crawling right back out of the clouds before, giving me a grin. Freakin’ dolls.

Sue-Zee then joins in our fight, calling Navi over and donning their even more complete mech suit before skating in. Throwing heavy handed punches, any attacks they receive seem to pass through their body and only damage the suit, though barely. The duo then throws a punch that spins them to face my direction, a fierce expression on their face.

“I’m going for the witch!” they say, much to my dismay.

“What?!” I shout back, summoning my morning star and smashing some heads in that soon replace themselves. “Don’t do something stupid, you two!”

“Stupid is exactly what we need!” they yell.

“WHAT?!”

“Clearly this lady has beef with us! We think it’s time these two humans had a chat with the human over there!”

I want to argue back, but more thralls take my attention away and Sue-Zee is already off, rocketing through the waves of TV animals and bashing some of them away in the process. I attempt to follow, blowing up my own path through the thralls and looking back to Fox and Annette, the dolls nodding at me as they defend the line between the TV animals and our allies. Niamh notices our sudden change in formation and swoops over, weaving dark clouds and hurling lightning bolts and hail storms upon waves of enemies. Unfortunately, because of course unfortunately, I soon find a summoning circle forming before me as the thralls form a clearing around me. Oh, this is a very familiar red summoning circle…

“Oh, don’t you worry, Cat!” Waywright’s voice echoes about me. “A special friend of yours volunteered to play with you himself!”

You’ve gotta be fuckin’ kidding me.

 

A metal gauntlet reaches out from the circle, grabbing its edge and pulling its owner out from the darkness.

“Ares…” I spit out. 

His armour now takes on a black colour, obsidian-like even, while his suit underneath  has been changed to  a solid gold. Tacky fucker.

“I TOLD you bo--”

Before the god of war can utter whatever vile thing he was about to say, his head twitches, and he looks back towards Waywright, who is shaking her head.

“What did we discuss about decency, Mister God of War?”

The armoured figure grumbles before turning back to me, drawing a golden blade and an equally bright shield out of the aether.

“...I TOLD you, cat, that was the last time I would be felled by the hands of one sent by your… Mother…”

Ares looks back to Waywright, who nods at the Radiant. They then turn back to me, the same fiery look in their glowing eyes that I remember, and I shoot a burning glare right back, hauling my morning star over my shoulder.

“Don’t you remember how this went last time, fuckface?” I say with a snarl.

I spin my weapon overhead before slamming it headfirst into the ground next to me with a hand on my hip. The oversized tin can bangs his blade against his shield twice, growling in return.

“Oh, things’ll be very different this time, cur! Adamantite armour, forged by Hephaestus… herself! Your fire means nothing to me now!”

“Oh, her, huh?” I muse to myself before shaking my head. “Wait, didn’t you fuck her wife?!”

“I will not forfeit details of the transaction!” he screams a bit more angrily than I’d expected, even considering who I’m dealing with. “Just know it took a great deal of courage and strength, and I am no less a straight man because of them!”

“You’re an absolute joke,” I tell him, looking him in the glowing, burning eyes and remembering the night we first met, any humour I might have found at his expense being burned away by a blazing rage in my heart.

“CEASE YOUR INCESSANT MOCKERY!!” Ares screeches, raising his blade and pointing its tip at me. “No longer shall I find myself beneath lowly types such as yourself! I BELONG ABOVE, IN OLYMPUS, IN THE HEAVENS!!”

Without another word, surprisingly enough for being such a loud mouth, he begins charging towards me, sword raised high, followed by a wave of blades rising from the clouds behind him. Before he gets close enough to strike, however, I take a step forward, drawing a line in the ground with my foot, glowing mushrooms sprouting in its wake, then leaping back. Unfortunately, things aren’t as simple as that, as I soon find a spear poking at my back. It’s one of many of Ares’ ethereal guards jabbing at me, making me wince and the god of war speed up his charge. My brow furrows as the god’s army only fuels my anger, gripping my weapon tighter before bearing the pain and spinning, slamming the fiery orb into the side of one of the soldiers. The sound of the impact mixed with the melting of armour rings louder and louder as one foe is knocked into another, sending them scattering. Even with the troop easily taken care of, the distraction proved enough for Ares, the god finding himself close enough to make a leaping strike...as soon as he steps on my line in the clouds.

He was right about the new armour taking heat well, as the resulting heatwave from the explosion of mushrooms doesn’t manage to do much to him. Still, the blast staggers him just enough for me to dash out of the way, ducking low and zipping under the armoured foe. My tail flicks as sparks rise from its tip and up through my hair, small flames taking the shape of fireflies, each buzzing up and around, into the course of Ares’ attack and into the blades floating around him, pushing them off course. Small but bright explosions litter his field of view as they batter his armour, yet still only managing to stagger him.

“I told you, beast!” he exclaims as he lands, turning and raising his shield just in time for my morning star to slam right down upon it. “Your flames mean NOTHING!! YOU ARE NOTHING!!”

 

“Oh, shut the fuck UP, WOULD YOU?!” I yell.

Letting go of my weapon, I draw out a beam saber, ducking under Ares’ arms and using this blade to deflect his own while my fist comes crashing into his gut. This puts a dent in his armour and knocks the wind out of him for a moment.

“How ‘bout I just BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF YOU THEN, HUH!?”

The god of war bashes his shield into my head once he’s regained composure, knocking me back, but I dash back in just as fast, fury adorning my face as I throw a slash to the side, pushing his blade aside. With the opportunity open, I grab the sides of his shield and begin crushing them inwards and scowling at the sweating god.

“Y’ALL THINK YOU’RE SO FUCKING CLEVER WORKING AROUND FIRE, HUH!?”

Before his sword can come swinging towards me, I pull my feet up, using Ares’ shield as leverage as I press them against his chest and KICK, ripping the protection out of his hand while sending him skidding back into a crowd of TV animals.

“YOU’RE SO FUCKIN SMART, OH, THE CAT HAS FIRE POWERS, WHAT WILL SHE DO NOW?! I’LL SHOW YOU FUCKING WHAT, PRICK!!”

With a spin and a toss, I send his shield flying back at him, and though he attempts to deflect it with a swing of his sword, it only manages to put a dent in the blade, throwing him off for just long enough for me to get up in his face safely.

“YOU BELONG IN HEAVEN, HUH MOTHER FUCKER?!”

A cloud quaking stomp between his feet leaves a burning print in the ground as a whole ass lighthouse begins rocketing up beneath Ares at blazing speeds, hitting him like a truck as he’s sent flying into the air.

“I’LL DRAG YOU TO THE PEARLY GATES MYSELF…!!”

Another stomp, another streetlamp, only this time, breaking it off of its base with a swift kick, I grab it in both hands and flip it upside down, smashing its glass into the ground and rocketing up with the strength of the flames it spews. Very soon, I find myself at the peak of Ares’ launch, almost as high as Metatron’s throne, where I let go of my ride up and brandish my morning star once more, holding it high above my prey.

“AND DROP YOUR ASS ALL THE WAY BACK TO HELL.”

BASH!! I drive my weapon into Ares’ back and watch as his powerless body is sent hurtling back to the ground…then through it. Back down to earth he goes, and I don’t think he’ll be coming back up any time soon. I fall back down to the ground, finding a soft bed of clouds awaiting me, as well as an all too friendly snake.

“Not even a last word from him, not bad, dear.”

“I’ve had enough words from him to last multiple lifetimes. I’d say I spared us all some brain cells.”

Niamh chuckles before looking around at the ring of TV animals slowly approaching us from all sides, groaning and raising her arms up. A wall of clouds builds from the ground before the enemies, only to freeze over into a barrier of ice so she can look back to me uninterrupted.

“The thralls are thinning in numbers, I’d say the duo’s plan is working. I need to return to the others before they get too tired to get back up, but you need to end this fight. I’ll catch up with you all when I can.”

Before I can even get up to comply with the snake, she whips out a misty cloud like it’s a towel and wraps it around my waist, the injury I’d forgotten about in my back healing even faster.

“Thanks, Nia. Shred some wings for me.”

“Only because you asked~”

I get back on my feet and Niamh soars into the air, giving me room to hurl a lantern bomb at the ice wall, blowing open both a hole sized for me and the thralls that were clawing and striking at it too. Charging through the flames, I see Niamh relaying her message to Fox and Annette before flying off to our allies taking care of the seraphim. That just leaves Sue-Zee, who I can only hope have been handling things well on their end…

 

Zee

 

Handling things surprisingly well, thanks future Cat! Maybe keep that sorta stuff on the down low while we’ve got the perspective? Oh, sure sure!

So here we are, skating atop these clouds like it’s no thing, throwing punches left and right at these TV headed animal things and feeling kinda bad because they’re cute but ultimately dangerous. We also noticed the animals are sort of avoiding us? They’ll approach to attack, but suddenly hesitate once they’re near enough to our mech suit! Makes clearing a path through them all the easier, giving us a chance to look behind and find Cat trailing us, only for Waywright’s voice to echo around the field, addressing the kitty before stopping her with some summoning circle of sorts. Unfortunately, we’ve got a less than pleasant date with a witch, but I’m sure Cat can take care of herself!

And that witch seems totally bummed out as that date approaches, the two of us skidding to a stop before her.

“So, the betrayer approaches!” she announces, her voice no longer booming as she only addresses us. “Come to try and talk your way out of this one?”

“Nah,” I say with a shrug, “I’d rather just beat the shit out of you for causing our crushes so much trouble, but if you wanna talk while we dance, we’d be happy to take part!”

So we start dashing in, Waywright focusing with her staff as a staticy summoning circle appears in front of her, calling out a flatscreen headed lion! Unfortunately for her, we’re able to skirt to the side as the cat lunges at us, our rockets propelling us back once they’ve landed, giving us the perfect angle for a direct hit to their head! SMASH!! Another burst of static, no sweat.

The witch grinds her teeth, looking from side to side as the thralls nearest by stare on, nervous to even approach, even for their master.

“Tch…even mechanically inclined magic won’t deter your machinery? So be it…”

Uh oh, this sounds like a better time than any to hunker down. Slamming the sides of our mechanical arms together, I set up a metal wall that extends from the arms’ sides, peeking over it to keep an eye on Waywright.

She holsters her staff on her back, the orb atop it still glowing bright to summon more thralls to the battle field. With her hands free, she reaches into some compartment in her robe, pulling out gloves of silver with an onyx looking gem on the back of each, slipping them on and staring right at me.

“I will not fool myself into believing you can see reason any longer! You brainwashed fool… I wish not to bring harm to our kind, but it is clear you have left me no other option!”

The hell? I tilt my head at her, eyes flickering between her furious face and the gloves on her hands, staticy wisps of energy flaying off of them.

“Brainwashed? Ma’am, we’re not even supposed to be here!”

“You won’t be in but a moment!”

 

She throws her palm forward, a spike formed out of white noise and TV static hurtling towards us, prompting us to duck down and have our shield take the brunt of the force. It’s not much compared to our suit, but it’s a lot stronger than the thralls’ attempts at attacks. Brute Justice won’t withstand this for too long… I’ve noticed she’s been keeping her back turned away from us rather defensively. A weak point, perhaps? If I can just position Navi’s prototype weapon... Sounds like a better plan than any! I’ll keep her on her toes!

Withdrawing the shield on one side, I fiddle with the controls inside our right metal gauntlet, its hand spinning and whirring before folding into itself. Next, it flips out two electrical generators, their electricity shooting out at each other’s and forming a makeshift laser blade. Here’s hoping this works on magic as well as it does scraps!

The witch begins whipping her hands in our direction, and we use our fist to bash away each attack at first, but it’s clear our suit can only handle so much of that. Moment of truth! With a staticy spike shooting right for us, I drive our blade directly at it, the electricity cutting right through her attack! Yes!!

“Such ingenuity… If only you’d see the light!”

“We saw the light, you bimbo!”

Dancing around and through her attacks, I’m able to get close enough for an attack, but the witch uses her magic to propel herself away, though, she seems unnerved as she lands.

“B-Bimbo?! Heathen!! If the false goddess had shown you her fake light, you would be one of them already, don’t try and fool me!”

“What are you talking about?! She literally asked if we wanted ascension and we said ‘not right now!’”

“Wh-what…?!”

That revelation makes her stop for just a moment, enough time for us to rocket over to her landing zone before she can muster another attack, hauling this giant metal fist before the pistons inside amplify the force straight to her gut!

“URK--”

The witch is launched way far away, tumbling against the cloudy ground before her staticy tendrils help her back to her feet, wiping the blood from her mouth.

“This energy you have… What in the hell are you…?!”

“Oh, y’know. We’re just two average folks from the countryside who work as criminal masterminds. As a hobby.”

Waywright spits and shakes her head. 

“Two…?” she mutters, glaring at me before glancing to the side and shaking her head harder.

“I know I’m expending myself, be QUIET!! This MUST be done…!”

Huh? There’s no one I can see around her. Oh well, not gonna let it ruin my day. I begin charging towards her once again, this time moving Navi to the witch’s back side for a finishing attack!

“Y’ain’t doin’ a damn thing if we’ve got anything to say about it!”

Just as I’m about to reel back for a rocket powered punch, Waywright suddenly turns around and-- BRKRZTVRRRrrrr…

NO!! No no no no no--

Sights are down. Everything takes a more realistic look compared to the uncanny magical looks before as our feed from Navi is cut. Waywright figured it out! Thankfully, I can still see her and the rest of our allies, though everything else disappears, including the unnatural light in the sky, the night having been returned. The witch turns back to me after having shot a spike through our eye in the sky…

“You’re clever! Working around this magical field with a drone. We could do so much together if you’d just-- GRK--!!”

Yes!! Before Navi could go out, their proto-type laser charged just enough! She fires, albeit a bit off aim, but the beam hits Waywright straight through the leg, just before Navi goes offline. You did good, girl…

“BASTARDS!!” she screeches, stumbling and holding her wound. “I cannot afford to retreat entirely… But your forces have lost key allies…”

She thinks we’re key allies… That’s flattering and all, but we’re basically out of the fight… I sigh, shaking our head before releasing ourselves from our suit and stepping out.

“Krzt-- Navi is down, y’all, we’re stepping out of battle until further notice.”

We watch the witch smirk as she begins descending into a summoning circle, only for her eyes to go wide as we grin back, fiddling with our watch before slamming down on its face dramatically. With Fox and Cat as close as they are, it’s time for a last ditch effort.

“KRZT-- BE OUR EYES AND FIRE!!”

 

“Bing! Self-destruction sequence initiated!”