Four hundred and sixteen. I had managed to live that long even though I hated my life from the very beginning. I always had issues with Aska, but in the last years it had gotten far, far worse, so much so that I barely managed to live on. For real though, I lived longer than expected in this horrible place which was a wonder in itself.

Confined in a glass palace above the clouds, I was unable to visit anyone after Aska won the war against Irminsul for my freedom. I wanted to thank her for the efforts she made to help … but even that was impossible. I wasn’t allowed to have any social contacts after all, especially not to those I held dear.

Since that fateful war, three years already went by during which I barely managed to visit the massive city below. Elysium – the world of the gods – was just below me, far away and yet so close. And until now, it was out of reach for me.

But a single flying car made its way towards the glass house far above the clouds, thankfully not chased by any police. One last time, I looked through the house I spent years in and shook my head. I would definitely not miss any second of my life there as I hadn’t experienced any happy second there. Steady, I walked towards the door which materialised itself after I typed in Aska´s password at a panel and stepped out of it. Thanks to the protective bubble around the house, the air was still calm as the car stopped in front of the house and a door opened. Calmly, I gazed back towards the reflective glass and smiled. Finally, everything would be over.

“Have you grown roots or what?” From the inside, bob´s hoarse voice resounded which did shake me away from my momentary freeze.

“No, not at all.” Swiftly, I stepped into the car and closed the vertical door behind me again, shortly before the car made a jump forwards and descended at breakneck speed. “Are you sure nobody can track us with this?”

“It´s the best of the best. As long as we don’t cross paths with an origin god we are going to be fine.” Well, I was worried about exactly this type of god. Aska was one and he would surely search for me all over the place when he found me missing which couldn’t be that far into the future. Despite disabling every security mechanism I found, he surely caught wind of my escape already … but I couldn’t care less. My escape wasn’t important. Bob wasn’t there to help me in that regard. He was delivering something for me.

“Are you sure you want to do this?” He asked while showing me the empty silvery gun previously stored in the area between us.

“More than ever before.” I claimed and grabbed it a bit clumsily. I was never that good with guns after all. “The bullet?”

“Made out of the finest stabilized antimatter with a whole bunch of holy platinum.” Well, that was nice and all, but I needed something different. A mixture that should not be allowed to exist at all. Two antagonistic elements combined into one was what I needed, otherwise nothing would be able to destroy this body of mine once and for all.

“And?” I asked doubtful.

“The god´s of fire and water have luckily sold a bit of their blood to me for a horrendous price. Are you sure your father will pay for everything?” He handed me the bullet over shortly afterwards and I felt the opposing forces in the bullet in surprising harmony. Crafting such a thing that went against the laws of the universe was illegal … but Bob didn’t care and neither did I. “Shit … they found us.”

Turning around, I noticed the flying police cars chasing us at breakneck speed while we accelerated once moreas well. Aska must have informed them about my absence and as we were the only suspicious ones around, there wasn’t any question on who they needed to catch.

“I do hope you know what you are doing.” And with that, Bob simply vanished. It must have been nice to be the child from the god of illusions in that regard. Well, he had the ability to escape this chase, but I didn’t.

“Drop me off at this building.” I told the hacked artificial intelligence and closed my eyes for a second while the engines of the car worked hard against the beam attempting to hold it back.

It took me so long to convince Bob to deliver these two items, especially because I couldn’t pay him in advance. Well, his eyes would surely fall onto the floor once he noticed I wasn’t going to murder an angel with this and Aska wouldn’t pay him at all. Smiling, I opened the door of the car jumped out of it and landed on the rooftop with relative ease.

“Freeze!” Several angels were jumping out of the police cars, following me with their pristine white wings closely. But as soon as I had loaded the gun with the single bullet and pointed it at either one of them, they rather backed off and kept their distance.

“I want to talk to him. That’s all.” I claimed right away. These angels didn’t have to get involved at all and apparently, they agreed with me.

“I´m already here.” Aska said from behind me and made me twirl around swiftly. He didn’t attack though, knowing that I was capable of defending myself for a few seconds. “What are you doing?”

“Isn´t that obvious? I´m going to get my revenge on you. Since basically forever, you ruined my life. You put a wedge between my family and me, my friends and everyone I loved! You are the worst!” I shouted out angrily.

“I am your family.” He claimed calmly, still thinking that the gun I held in my head was only capable of killing my vessel normally. But this wasn’t a normal god slaying weapon. It was so much more than that.

“You stopped being my father the moment you started raping me.” I shouted out, put the gun against my own temple and looked at the man who claimed to be my father one last time.

“Wait!” He stormed towards me, death flooding out of his body but even he wouldn’t be fast enough. Without a hint of regret, I pulled the trigger and accepted the darkness right away. It must have been horrible to look at for Aska … his own daughter committing suicide in front of him, something that hadn’t happened since hundreds and hundreds of years.

My body was disintegrated by the small explosion in my head and a conflicting, violent mass of fire and water attached itself to the very core of my body. Directly, I was flung towards the place were all gods resurrected to be revived, but my body was already corrupted beyond repair and unable to accept my waiting soul. It disintegrated, unable to be reconstructed fully as long as I accepted the corruption assaulting my body. With my abilities I could repair my body easily, at least during the first few days … but I didn’t do so. I let my own body crumble and rot completely until it couldn’t be reconstructed anymore.

My soul was the only bit left of me, dormant because I had no body to hold it. For a goddess, this was as close to death as I could get thanks to my indestructible soul … and this was exactly what I wanted.

Finally, I was left alone by Aska.

The only task for me to do until my soul went into complete hibernation was to remember … to remember what I had done wrong.