I tried very hard to ignore the implications of the tutorial ignoring that question but my mind wouldn't let it go. were there seriously people out there who would murk me if I didn't fall in line?

well, thinking back, they had made that truck jumped the curb just to smush me when I hadn't gotten up to save my little sister.

who was the bigger jerk in that scenario? we'd all been minding our own business. it's not like the truck couldn't have swerved onto the other side of the street. she would've been fine!

maybe this was supposed to be a morality lesson. I was clearly a terrible person for not sacrificing myself to save my little sister, so dealing with a happy-go-lucky, possibly murderous system and Fanny was supposed to be my punishment.

the real question was: am I learning anything?

eh, that's too much thinking. I put those thoughts away for later, less sleepy Cooper to deal with and focused back on the task at hand: completing the tutorial. the fast I got this done, the sooner these way too bright screens would disappear.

seriously, I don't even have eyes. how does it manage to blind me when I look directly at it?

[Are you ready for the next step, core?]

the tutorial screen flashed a ridiculously ugly neon purple color. unnecessary as I was just about to come out of my inner monologue.

fine, yes, let's get on with it.

[Excellent! To furnish a room, cores use something called an 'object'! An object is a nonliving dungeon artifact that adventurers and the like can interact with! Things such as traps, torches, cutlery...they're all objects.

You may be thinking, 'But tutorial, I don't know how to make an object!']

this is like watching Jera¹'Dora' comes from the Spanish word exploradora (which is the feminine form of explorador). Jera comes from viajera(o), which is Spanish for traveler. Thus, literary genius. the Traveler. it slapped when you're, like, three, but once your mind actually expands and grows...

it stops slapping when you hit, like, 25 for some people.

[Fear not, because the tutorial has something just for you, core! See, 'objects' can be made and placed from something called a template. A template is essentially a magical blueprint that you can alter as you wish—as long as you have the mana to pay for it!

Templates sound really cool, now, huh? Don't you want to find out how to make one?]

why is this tutorial so expressive? where is this coming from?

uggh these questions are taking up too much brain power. just get to the point!

[First, let the tutorial show you how to find the templates you'll make in the future! Say the command [Template Menu]  to-]

[Template Menu]!

[Template Menu

Mobs (3)
Objects (9)]

[Wow! It's pretty empty, right? You're probably curious about what everything is, so let's take things one step at a time! There's currently no rush, so let's leave object templates for a little later.

First, let's check out the mob templates!]

situational irony would dictate that something come barreling through the entrance right then and there. I waited a beat, half-hoping some monster would come poke its nose in. if only to spare me a few minutes away from the tutorial.

alas, nothing came. you failed me, AP English Lang & Comp!

before the tutorial could blind me into getting back on track, I mentally pressed the [Mob Template] button. haa. mentally selecting things is quite handy...

I definitely could've used this feature back on Earth...I still miss having hands though.

[Current Mob Templates

Wisp - 4 variants

Rabbihorn - 1 variant

Warty Croaker - 0 variants

Create new template - 5 MP]

[Here is where you'll find the templates of any mobs you create or absorb! Creating a new mob template always has a base cost of 5 MP, even if the mob you end up generating costs less than that!

Let's take a look at the mob you absorbed in Part A of Step 2!]

the template for wisps opened up in front of me. it was basically the same as the Rabbihorn template with the description, stats, and mana cost.

probably should've thought to find more about the wisps earlier in my brief dungeon career...

eh thinking about hindsight takes too much energy.

[Template: Wisps

Wisps are small, teardrop shaped spirits formed out of pure mana. They are weak and very fragile due to their near incorporeal bodies. Despite not having any muscles, their tiny bodies have admirable speed and dexterity. While they prefer to coast on ambient mana currents, they'll put on a burst of speed to dodge out of danger.

Due to the nature of their creation, they have considerable control and affinity for magic. Though their spell list is lacking and damage negligible, their bodies are bursting with pure or attuned mana, depending on the variant. If you can catch one, they make an excellent ingredient for hundreds of potion recipes.

Strength: F | Speed: E | Stamina: F
Toughness: F | Dexterity: D | Control: D

HP: 10 | Stamina: 5 | Mana: 35

Affinity: Pure (Major), Elemental (Requires Attuned Variant - Major)

Skills:
Happy Twirl - Twirl, Twirl, Twirl! Recovers 1 SP and 3 MP per twirl!

Spells:
Spit - Spit a glob of pure (or if attuned variant, elemental) magic - 3 MP
Mana Flight (Perk) - Passively hover above the ground - Free

Base - 2 MP
Attuned Variant - 3 MP

Upgrades available!]

[As you can see, the mob template gives you a lot of important information about the creatures in your dungeon. You'll explore the mob templates a little more later but, for now, let's look at object templates!]

wait, hold on, I wanna see what upgrades are available.

I went to select the [Upgrades] button but my mental pointer finger hit a wall. I strained against it, attempting to brute force my way through what oddly felt like actual concrete.

then the wall pulsed. my finger rebounded off it, stumbling back-

wait, huh? how can a finger stumble back? it doesn't have-

oooh, stop it! this thing is making me think with all the stupid things it's throwing at me!

[Please follow the tutorial, core! You'll explore the upgrade feature later! If you do not cooperate, there will be penalties!]

insanity...absolute insanity...

the wisp template snapped shut—not of my own accord.

this stupid thing! making me use big words in anger! fine. let's just get this over with.