autumnrayne92

Content Warning: Blood and Anxiety

That next week, my father stopped by my room after dinner with a long package wrapped in cloth. 

“Here, I tried to make this based on what you explained to me last week using extra scraps lying around the workshop,” he said as he unwrapped a long wooden pole with a leather strap on one end. He placed it by my side for me to hold.

“I made the bottom of one end wide and flat and also cut a bevel on the top side of the pole to sit under your shoulder. You can take the top leather loop and tighten it over your shoulder to hold it in place,” he explained, seeming proud of his work. 

I picked it up and shifted myself to the edge of the bed. While letting the pole lay off the edge of the bed, I slipped my shoulder nub through the leather loop and after a little hassle I was able to tighten the strap around my shoulder. The weight of the crutch felt awkward as it pulled me forward a bit, but I was eventually able to position myself so I could rest my body weight against it. 

“Looks like it fit fine. If this works well, hopefully I can have my boss start making them and ask for a raise,” he said to himself and walked off. 

Looking down at myself and the new crutch, I was both grateful and a bit unnerved by my father. On one hand, he seemed happy to help make something I thought up, but it seemed his reasoning was not just to help me.

“With this at least I can start expanding my range of motion around the house,” I thought to myself. 

I spent the few hours before passing out exhausted attempting to get a feel for the new appendage and even managed to balance myself straight up beside my bed. Having less muscle from not moving around didn’t help with my stamina. 

Over the next week, I attempted to build up more stamina by standing up for extended periods of time and eventually taking smaller steps around my room. I found that by swinging my shoulder nub forward and lifting it slightly I could get some small motion forward as the crutch would move forward and I could hop my other leg forward slightly. Eventually I was able to get the hang of this enough to explore more of my room. 

From hobbling around, I was able to see where I had been living the past few months from a different perspective. I had my small bed with a nightstand nearby which held my daily food. Needless to say at this point, I couldn’t make it to a restroom in the house so I had my bedpan friend nearby on the other side of the bed along with a small candle which lit up my room. I made my way over to the wall with a window and stared out. As I looked forward, a tired brick wall of the next door house stood in front of me with a dingy alleyway in between us and a smoggy sky above reminding me of how close we were to the factory zone. The same brick wall was visible from my bed, but now I could see it up close and make out similar looking houses to its left and right telling me we were in a clustering of older brick homes in this impoverished neighborhood.

After exhausting myself with my small room adventure I fell back on my bed and rested. 

A few weeks later, I had started getting much more comfortable moving around and managed to fully explore the second floor on which I lived on. From over the railing, I could tell that my room faced the backside of the house since I could see the front door looking down along with a small staircase connecting both floors. That morning, I could hear my mother rushing around downstairs hurrying not to be late for work only to forget to bring me food and water for the day. Feeling a bit guilty about always having her take care of me, I took it upon myself to make the long journey down the stairs in search of sustenance.  

And this is where I made my first major mistake of venturing out too far… The first few steps of the stairs were easy going as I swung my crutch to the next step down while holding on to the railing with my good arm. But then I overcompensated my crutch swing and missed the next step and tumbled forward losing my balance. 

*Pop* , *Smash*, *Bang* [SFX for good measure of someone falling face forward down stairs]

I must have blacked out because when I woke up, my head was reeling and was slightly wet. I moved my hand from the front of my head and was greeted with a wonderful dark red colored hand and iron smell in front of my face.

“Ughh,” I mumbled to myself. The world was still spinning as I looked to my side and without thinking clearly I attempted to right myself by pushing myself up...and so I spectacularly pushed myself up slightly only to face plant the floor again as my equilibrium had not returned. 

Laying there for what felt like an eternity, I looked to my injured side only to realize the weight of the crutch I had gotten used to was missing and laid across the room from myself. The strap must have slipped off during the fall since my shoulder felt loose. The wet feeling on my head eventually stopped and  I eventually managed to flip myself onto my back, but I didn’t have the strength to do much more as I laid on the ground. As time went on so did my panic and anxiety rise as I laid helpless on the ground waiting for help. Eventually I passed out after hyperventilating and found myself back in my bed feeling sore all over. 

autumnrayne92

Thanks again for all those who have been reading my story. The next chapter starts Lilly's progression forward into her new life along with an eventual meeting with someone special.

To be honest, I have about 20 pages of school work to try and knock out this week before finals start, but between my own personal anxiety issues I felt the need to write to attempt to calm down a bit. Oh the fun of taking graduate Comp Sci classes online during the pandemic. I did my best to read through the chapter before posting it, but if you see any grammar edits feel free to point them out so I can correct them.