Chapter 91: Joke(r)’s on you

Against Nami’s advice Robin went to talk to Rick. First to apologize; it wasn’t his fault Momonosuke was an old pervert in the body of an eight years old and duped her. It was hers for reacting the way she did believing her husband was just being jealous. She remembered what he had told her when he had accepted that she also liked women; he wouldn’t allow another man to lay a finger on her, that he would kill them all. So when he grabbed Momonosuke she got scared he would hurt an innocent child. In the end she was half right but not as she thought.

The second was to support him; between his new situation with his body and the situation with his daughter, he was not really in the best frame of mind. Sadly, when she opened the garden’s door, who’s not been locked again after Nami’s departure, she found no one inside. She didn’t bother to search for him around Sunny as she knew that if Rick didn’t want to be found he wouldn’t be. Going back to their room she slid under the bed and hugged Nami.

“He wasn’t there.” stated the redhead.
“He wasn’t.”
“I thought so. It’s alright, give him time.”
“I can’t, he needs me.”
“He does but he also can take care of himself.”

Robin didn’t answer, while Nami was right, it still didn’t feel right for her. She will try again tomorrow.

~~~~~

Dressrosa was in sight, many members of the crew were excited. Trafy tried to remind everyone of the plan they talked about at length the day before but without any success.
“Wait! Where is your Vice-captain?” he asked.
“Eh?! He’s not here?” replied Luffy.
“Don’t worry, he’s not one to mess up plans.” said Sanji.
“He’s probably already on the island, getting some info.” added Franky.
“That’s not fair! He should have…” began Luffy.

The conversation was tuned out by Robin who felt a pang of guilt hit her. Her chance to talk with him went away and she didn’t like that. She was actually starting to get angry at not being able to make it up to her husband because of her husband himself.

“That’s it! I may apologize, but he’s going to get it for avoiding me for so long!”

~~~~~

Meanwhile Rick, unlike what everyone was thinking, was in the training room at the top of the mast. After using the dirt from Marie Geoise, he had collected into the two bags he had come back with, he worked on the garden again, planting seeds of different plants or vegetables. Picking up his experiments from two years ago, he either continued or started anew. Now that the garden was back into order he could practice his haki for more than just during the night. That’s where he’s been since Nami left the room. He had left the way Nami got in and without anyone finding out reached the training room where he’s been ever since.

The objective was twofold. One: develop his observation haki to the scale of Ener of Fujitora. The latter being the original owner of the Zushi Zushi no mi and blind had trained his observation haki in combinaison to his gravity to see despite being in total darkness. There was no reason Rick couldn’t do the same.
Second: applying armament haki to his gravity. The idea came to him while working on his observation.

“If one can use their DF abilities in combination with observation, what reason would there be to not be able to do the same with armament? After all, armament is all about reinforcing one’s body or weapon. Where observation is the reading of others' spiritual energy, armament is the emission of one’s own through a medium. It’s an infusion of spiritual energy, something intangible. Theoretically one should be able to infuse it into intangible things, like gravity.”

And so he spent his time switching between training the two. He had made no progress with the first, but with the second he had a minor success. After many tries he had pushed away a dumbbell harder than the actual amount of gravity he had applied should have allowed. He had focused on repeating this success over and over. In the end what limited him was the amount of haki he was infusing. He had wanted to test a new attack, something he had thought would be the peak of gravity, but just like the meteor rain he couldn’t do it around others. If it worked and something went wrong… a hundred meteor showers would have been better.

Satisfied with his morning training he exited the training room for a late breakfast. Landing on deck he saw only Brook, Nami, Chopper and Momo ( who made sure to stay away from him.)

“““Rick!!”””
“Good morning!”
“What are you doing here ?!” exclaimed Nami.
“Eeeeh… I live here?”

Wrong answer. The redhead love punched him to the ground.

“We thought you were already on the island, you idiot!”
“Oh?! We finally arrived at Dressrosa?”
“Yes, this morning.” replied Chopper doing a check up on him by reflex
“Did everyone else leave already?”
“Robin, Law, Usopp and Caesar, left for Green Bit. The rest of the crew went to explore the city with Kin’emon.” explained Brook.
“Where were you anyway?” asked Nami.
“In the training room, experiencing with… you know what.” he gave a meaningful look to Nami.
“...”
“What is what?” asked Chopper.
“A surprise!” replied Rick with a grin.

He started to float but was grabbed by the leg by his kitten so he landed back on the deck.

“And where do you think you’re going?”
“To the city. I’m the  best suited to destroy the smile factory after all.”
“Nu-huh. We need you here to protect the Sunny.”
“You’re kidding right? You alone could deal with most of the attackers and Chopper and Brook are no slouch either.”
“It’s… just in case.”
“...”
“...”
“I’ll send Sanji back here. He’s more suited to fight people than destroy buildings.Is that good enough?”
“... I guess.” she said with a sigh.

Rick thought the conversation was over and began to take to the air again but was grabbed once more. He looked at Nami in confusion.

“Robin wants to talk to you. Actually she went to the garden yesterday but you weren’t there.”
“...”
“...”
“Is she still mad?”
“At herself. Though since you’re avoiding her she might be mad at you for that.”
“... That I can handle.”
“She’s sorry.”
“I know, Nami. She’s my wife, I know how she thinks and feels well.”
“... I really don’t like it, you two… not together.”
“I don’t like it either.” he said as he came close and leaned before whispering into her ear in a teasing tone.
“Once Robin and I have made up, what do you say I keep my promise and mark you again?”
“You better! You’re three days late already.” she said, faking a pout.

She let go of him for good and the ex-marine flew towards the city.


~~~~~

While he was flying he recognized Sanji and Kin’emon talking actively about something. He landed next to them.

“Hey guys! What are you doing?”
“Rick?” “Sir Rick?”
“That’s me, yes.”
“Where were you?” asked Sanji.
“In Sunny’s training room. I slept in, sorry.”
“We thought you… Nevermind. We lost Zoro.”
“That’s not unusual.”
“A fairy stole one of his swords.”
“Shisui! Wano’s treasure! That will teach that thief!” said Kin’emon outraged.
“Not now! We need to find him, we have things to do.” interrupted Sanji
“Okay, what about Luffy?”
“He’s participating in the tournament.”
“What tournament?”
“At the coliseum. He wants to fight.”
“Well that’s Luffy for you. What’s the price anyway, a year worth of meat?” said Rick, jesting.
“An eternal pose to some island named Lodestar. Everyone seems to want it for some reason but we didn’t find what.”
“Lodestar?!”
“You know about it?” asked Sanji.
“Know abo … Sanji, Lodestar is the name of the last island reachable with a log pose on Grand Line! The only island after that is Laugh Tale where the One piece is supposed to be!”
“What?!” exclaimed the cook in surprise.
“I don’t know how Doflamingo got it, but Luffy needs to win this tournament! If this eternal pose is real, whoever gets it would be the closest to the One Piece, we can’t let anyone else get it!”

“Goddess! Saving Ace changed everything, since he’s not dead, there is no Mera Mera no mi in circulation. I need to remember what happened in this arc.”

“Okay, here is what we’re going to do. Kin’emon and I will locate Zoro. Once done we’re going to the coliseum. Sanji, Sunny needs to be defended. There is no heavy hitter left there and Green Bit is not far away. If the negotiations with Doflamingo fail, and they probably will, neither Brook, Chopper or Nami would be able to handle him.”

Sanji nodded and left for Sunny, obeying his Vice-Captain order. Meanwhile Rick turns to Kin’emon.

“I’m sorry for acting the way I did with your son.” he said bowing.
“Usually, I would have just tied him to the mast, or made him do a good and exhausting workout, but…”
“I understand. Men tend to lose reason when it’s about their wife. I apologize too for not raising him properly.” replied the samurai bowing in return.
“My first impression was perhaps the worst but I promise you I’ll do better.”
“I’ll patiently wait then.” Kin’emon answered with a smile.
“Now about Shusui... It was stolen from Wano along with the corpse of its owner by a pirate named Moria. Moria used his powers to make him a Zombie.”
“Zombie?”
“A reanimated corpse.”
“What?!”
“Yes, It’s awful. Anyway, Zoro fought and won against the samurai who rewarded him with Shisui for his victory as he didn’t need it anymore.”
“I see… He still can’t keep it, Shisui is a national treasure of wano.”
“I think he would be inclined to give it back if Wano would offer him another sword in exchange.” replied Rick, making Kin’emon ponder.
“... It’s not impossible. There are plenty of swords in Wano but of the same quality or higher than Shisui… It would be difficult.”
“Higher?”
“Yes, while there are better swords than Shisui, none has as much history and reputation.”
“Let’s hope we find one who picks Zoro’s interest.”

The samurai nodded in agreement and each left their own way to find Zoro, agreeing to meet up at the coliseum.

“ An eternal pose to Lodestar. That would considerably cut the adventure short. Though, it would not help to get to Laugh Tale since no pose leads there. How did Roger and his crew do it? The most experienced sailor failed where a band of illiterates pirates succeeded. Wait a minute, that's not true! Olvia was with them! She was literate, and not just a bit, she was an archeologist and could read poneglyphs. Poneglyphs… Are they the key to finding Laug Tale? To find the One Piece?”

He was brought out of his thoughts when someone bumped into him violently making him fall backwards onto the ground. The only thing he saw was long black hair and a red rose adorning them. What he felt though… he liked it a lot. Two very big and bouncy tits were pressed firmly against his chest.

“Slightly bigger than Robin, but not as enjoyable against me.” he thought.

The lady who had pushed him down raised herself and looked at him.

“Please! Help me!”

“I remember her, isn’t she working for Doflamingo? Did I just take Sanji’s place?”
“Are you alright?”
“N-no, I need help!”
“Alright, alright calm down, let’s get both ourselves up and you’ll tell me what you need my help for.”

The woman who was straddling him moved and stood up allowing Rick to do the same.

“First thing first, my name is Rick, what’s yours?”
“V-violet.”
“Okay Violet. Despite the circumstances, nice to meet you. Now what do you need my help for?”
“I-I need you to k-kill a man!”
“... Okay, come again?”
“My ex-l-lover. I… He didn’t take well me breaking up with him. He already killed some men who got too close to me. When I told him I didn’t want to have anything to do with him anymore, he swore that if he could have me nobody will.”
“...”
“I-I-I c-cant live like that anymore!” she began to cry.

“Looking over my shoulder constantly, leaving in f-fear, I can’t.” She hugged him tightly and sobbed against his chest.

“She’s really a good actress. No wonder Sanji fell for her bullshit.”

“Alright, alright. I’ll help you.”
“R-really?” she asked in fake surprise, lifting her head to look at him.
“Yes. Do you know someplace we could talk? Preferably not in the open like we are now. I need to know more about this ex-lover of yours.”
“... There is a warehouse not far, we can use for a while.”
“Then lead the way violet.”

~~~~~
“How dumb are you?” said Violet sitting on a big chair. Had it been a bit more luxurious it could have been called a throne. She had her legs crossed and was looking down haughtily at a tied up Rick on the ground.
Rick was just looking at her exposed legs.

“ Damn, those legs are beautiful.”

Not liking being ignored she signaled with her head one of her subordinates behinds Rick who took pleasure to hit him a few times in the head.

“Sorry, you were saying? I was admiring your legs.” said Rick nonchalantly.
“Men. All pigs without exception.”
“If you were in my place, you'd be admiring your legs too.” replied the ex-marine with a grin. That earned him another beating.
“It’s alright if you don’t talk, I don’t need you to to get the information I want.” she smirked.

She made a circle with both her index and thumbs and put them against her eyes as if they were goggles.

“Oh?! You ate the Giro Giro no mi?”
“H-how do you…” she asked, shocked.
“Learned every devil fruit and their powers when I read the devil fruit encyclopedia when I was a kid.”
“... Who does that?!”
“Well... me?”
“That’s… How…”
“You know if you wanted to see me naked you just needed to ask. I would have appreciated a romantic dinner first bef…”

He didn’t get to finish his sentence as Violet moved as fast as lightning and kicked him in the face hard, sending him flying backwards. She was livid.

“Man your ex must have been really bad at sex if you treat all men you’re interested in like that.” he laughed, earning him another kick in the face.
“You’re going to shut up now, and I’m going to read your thoughts. Every secret you own, including your crew’s plan. Doffy will be pleased.”

As soon as she said that, she used her ability on Rick. Probing deep into his mind she searched for the answers she needed. She wasn’t about to find out about the system, the multiverse and the goddess that’s for sure. The deity had put in place safeguards to avoid that. What she found though was Robin. Or  to be more accurate she found RobinS.

One Robin was wearing the purple dress and stockings she wore at Thriller Bark. Another wore the black one piece from Enies Lobby. One was just in a towel bath wrapped around her.

“What is this?” Violet exclaimed.

She kept looking and just found more Robins. When she looked at the Robin in her white wedding dress she blushed. The last one she laid her eyes upon was Robin with nothing but black silk lingerie; lace panties, stocking reaching mid thighs and a garter belt who was supporting her breasts with her arms under them.

“YOU PIG!” she said, kicking him again, knocking out the air in his lungs.
*cough*” What? Can’t a man think non stop at his beautiful wife? How does that make me a pig?”
“Your wife? And you went away with me? Wow. What a faithful husband you are. I should get rid of you for her.”

She raised her leg for one last kick but started floating.
“What the…”

Rick pulled himself up having removed the seastone cuffs he binded with.

“You’re so quick to judge.” he said.

He sent all her men to the ceiling and back down to the floor with brutality, none of them were left conscious. At the sight Violet got scared.

“You see, my wife loves men AND Women. So…” he began getting close, so close that he took her chin in his hand while restraining her with some sprouted hands.
“When I see a beautiful woman I know she would like, I seduce her.” He kissed her right on the lips, forcefully. Violet tried to fight and bit him, drawing blood but Rick ignored the pain. Finally he broke the kiss.
“Yes, she would like you a lot.”
“There is no way I…”
“They all say that.” ” Well all is just Nami for now…”
“And all wanted more by the end.”
“I will not!” she denied vehemently.
“With how much you blush while you propped my mind, I doubt it. Anyway, back to your question of ‘How dumb am I?’, considering I knew right from the beginning you were a member of the Doflamingo family and that I’m currently in a position of dominance; I’d say not much.”
“What?! How?!”
“I know I’m handsome, but a gorgeous lady, bumping into me, pressing her bountiful chest against mine and asking for help… especially in a city where I’m the authorities are looking for me… That doesn’t happen. It was a great act though, a weaker man would have fallen for it.”
“Another thing is, I know when people are lying to me and you only told me the truth once.”
“...”
“Who do you want me to kill?”