“Why is it you? Are you fucking joking right now, Ah-Xian?” Changling asked with a crazed look on his face as he squeezed harder.

Youxian’s eyes started to tear up. Glaring at Changling, he said, “You’re hurting me.”

“I’m hurting you? What do you think you did to me? All these years without you, how was I supposed to breathe, walk, sleep without you?” Changling asked him.

Youxian watched as the tears formed in his eyes in disbelief. Was Changling really so delusional? “You’re one sick motherfucker if you think you mean anything to me after what you did to me! You ruined my life!”

“I ruined your life? I ruined your life?” Changling repeated.

The hand around his neck was squeezing tighter. Panicking, Youxian kicked his leg out, hitting Changling on the inner thigh of his left leg. 

The moment his hand loosened, Youxian slapped him across the face, shocking Changling. He then grabbed Changling by the collar and pushed him up against the wall and punched his face twice.

When Youxian made to punch him a third time, Changling caught his hand and covered his mouth with his left hand then dragged him outside as he said, “We wouldn’t want our daughter to wake up to the sound of you screaming my name now would we?”

Youxian was confused as he tried to fight back, then a moment of realisation hit him. ‘No, no, no,’ he yelled inside his head as Changling dragged him far from his home.

When they got far enough, Youxian was chucked against a tree and hit his head. He slipped to the floor and held his head. He looked at Changling, who took off the wrap around his head and loosened his shirt.

Youxian stared at him as he asked, “So what now? You’re going to have your way with me like you did when we first met? I’m sure you must have missed my body so much and even wished you were fucking me while inside of your wife.”

Changling scoffed. He got onto his knees in front of Youxian and cupped his face. Rubbing his thumbs over his cheeks, he said, “Oh no, my dear. No one is as good as you. Not my wife, not the eunuchs in training, not even the stable boy, but you? Was Wulin as good as me? Mn? You want to carry his child, don’t you? Why’d you have to do this to me? Why couldn’t you be a good boy and wait for me like I told you to?”

Youxian stared up, barely able to see Changling’s eyes. There was a deathly silence, not even a creek from the insects, as though a predator was near.

“Did you hurt him?” Youxian asked in almost a whisper.

“Who? Your husband? No, not at all, because if I did, I wouldn’t be able to remind this body of yours who it actually belongs to,” Changling whispered, then kissed Youxian on the lips.

He could feel tears glide against his fingers. Smiling, Changling asked, “Are you happy to see me, Ah-Xian?”

‘Why would I be happy?’ Youxian thought as he remained silent.

Soon Changling’s mouth was devouring Youxian’s mouth. 

Changling had Youxian pinned head down on the ground with his hips raised as he showed Youxian and his body who they belonged to.

Youxian had tears falling onto the ground beneath him. Every inch of him burned–it burned with joy and in pleasure making Youxian feel disgusted with himself.

He knew he missed this beast behind him, although he wanted nothing to do with him. 

Changling was the one he hated the most, but he was also the one he loved with a dying passion.

But now he felt guilty. 

What about the man who provided for him? 

The one who he had learnt to love?

Where was he now?

He knew Changling was lying when he said he didn’t hurt him.

Youxian knew the risk of having sex with Wulin from the first time and well as Wulin, but it was a guilty pleasure they both wanted.

Why couldn’t this last a little longer?

Couldn’t I just be happy for once?

Why did he have to find me?

Why is my life such a mess?

He doesn’t care about me, all he cares about is himself!

I hate you Rong Changling.

I hate you!

*

Changling was sitting on Xing Guang’s swing as he watched Youxian wash outside.

The sun was slowly rising, and the red marks on his body looked remarkable. 

He recalled how things used to be when they first met. Those marks never disappeared after their first time because he always made sure that those marks reminded Youxian knew his place.

“When will she get up?” He asked.

Youxian paused. The only ‘she’ he could be thinking about was their daughter.

Throwing the cloth down into the water, he turned around and walked towards Changling. Changling stopped the swing from moving and sat up. Looking at Youxian, who stopped in front of him, he asked, “We did it all night. Do you want to go again?”

Youxian was dead tired and Changling knew it, but the person in front of him was strong.

Staring down at him, Youxian said in a horse voice, “What do you think will happen from here? I will never love you again and my daughter only knows Wulin as her father. I’ll make sure she never accepts you.”

Changling felt hurt. The smile on his face faded as he stood up. Looking down, dead into Youxian’s eyes, he said, “I don’t mind it at all. You can be a whore for all I care, but you will only fuck who I tell you to. So behave yourself or you will never see OUR child again. Go get dressed and bring her to me. My throne is calling me and YOU my beautiful lover, is coming home with me.”

*

Xing Guang looked woke up while Youxian was getting dressed in his room. She made her way to the living area and saw Changling resting against the wall with his eyes closed. She froze, frightened because there was a stranger inside the house.

She looked around, hoping that she’d see one of her fathers, but there wasn’t anyone around.

Her hair tickled her nose as she turned her head, and it made her sneeze.

Changling opened his eyes and saw the frozen girl who had panic in her eyes as she looked at him.

He quickly sat up straight, and as he did that, he saw confusion on her face. Xing Guang seemed to calm down and take a closer look at him instead of running away.

“Is there something on my face?” Changling asked her.

She rubbed her eyes to see if he was really here and when she confirmed it, she asked, “Why are you here?”

Youxian heard the sneeze while still in his room and rushed out to find her. He came into the living area while she rubbed her eyes, then heard her words. Confused, he stopped behind her. Changling ignored Youxian, who walked in as he asked, “Am I not allowed to be here?”

“That’s not what I mean, your majesty,” she said, stunning her parents.

Youxian hugged her from behind as he asked, “Ah-Xing did you sleep well?”

She hugged her father and asked him, “Daddy, why is the emperor here? Did you get caught already? Do I have to go be a princess now?”

Youxian fought back his tears as he asked, “Baby, what are you talking about?”

She looked back at Changling, asking, “Did you kill him? Did you kill my father?”

Youxian’s heart shuddered. He looked at Changling for answers but saw that Changling was just as clueless.

“Do you know me?” Changling asked her.

She nodded her head as she said, “You’re Your Majesty, Crown Prince Hwang Seonu Da. My daddy’s real husband and my papa’s boss.”

‘Wulin, what have you done?’ Youxian screamed in his thoughts with the utmost respect and heartbreak.