That night the dream was much the same as the previous night, albeit with a tiny bit more clarity on the hips and hair. The rest of the week played out the same way: work, talk to Rowan at home, dream. After a week, I noticed that my hips were definitely bigger, which was causing my pants to be a bit tight and my hair was almost down to my shoulders, which kept getting in my face, but strangely I was okay with the changes. In fact, I was actually starting to hope that whenever this was done, I’d get to keep these changes. 

That night, however, was the first time that the dream was actually different. It started off like all the rest of my dreams, but this time my skin was slightly less blurry and I actually made it to the house. As I approached it I realized that I recognized this house; it was my childhood home. When I entered, I immediately smelled chocolate chip cookies baking in the oven. I made my way towards the living room and I saw myself as a kid, no older than nine, sitting there playing with some toys, and my mom sitting on the couch watching me. I was surprised at just how happy and carefree I looked back then. I was then surprised to hear myself speak.

“Mommy, I don’t like these toys,” the younger version of me said.

“Well, what kind of toys would you like, then?” my mom asked with so much tenderness and compassion that it was as if nothing could hurt me.

“I want pretty dollies like Rachel has.”

“Sure thing, honey, we can go to the store tomorrow and get you the prettiest ones they have.”

“YAY! Thank you, mommy,” my younger self exclaimed and I immediately jolted awake.

I woke up and I realized that I was crying over what I had seen. I hadn’t thought of that memory in well over a decade. What happened next was exactly what my mom had said would happen; she took me to the store the next day and bought me several dolls that I liked. Never once did she say anything about how I shouldn’t play with dolls because I was a boy; the people at school, however, were not so kind. It wasn’t long before the other kids found out and started making fun of me; even some of the teachers started to get in on it, so I got rid of the dolls. I was devastated by what had happened and never let myself show interest in anything girly again. 

I then got out of bed and made my way to the shower, but when I got in the shower, I found the pressure of the water unbearable on my skin. I then remembered that in my dream last night, my skin was slightly clearer, so that must be why it was so sensitive. Getting out of the shower, I put on a shirt that felt much rougher than usual and headed to the kitchen. Since it was the weekend, I decided to make pancakes for breakfast, and before long Rowan was in the kitchen making coffee. After eating breakfast, Rowan spoke up.

“So it looks like you changed more.”

“How did you notice? My skin is just more sensitive,” I asked and Rowan looked surprised.

“Well, for one, your skin looks much softer, but did you really not notice that all your body and facial hair is gone?” Rowan replied, and this time it was my turn to look shocked.

“Oh, I guess I didn’t,” I answered with a giggle.

“Well, I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised, you were always bad at seeing what was right in front of you,” Rowan said while giving me a meaningful look over her coffee.

“Yeah, I guess I can be a bit oblivious at times.”

“It’s no problem. How are you feeling about the changes though?” Rowan asked hesitantly.

“Honestly? I’ve actually been enjoying them quite a bit. I don’t know why, but I just feel more comfortable like this.”

“I’m glad to hear that; I was worried you might be feeling unhappy with the changes.”

“Well, don’t worry about it, I’m doing great. Although the dream was slightly different last night.”

“How was it different this time, was I in it?”

“No, you weren’t in it. The difference was I finally reached that house I told you about.”

“Ooh, what was in it? Was it treasure, an answer to what’s happening, the meaning of life? C’mon you gotta tell me,” Rowan whined while giving her best puppy dog eyes.

“Sadly, it was none of those things. It was actually a memory of when I was a kid.”

“Oh, I guess that’s nice too. What was the memory about?” Rowan asked, and for whatever reason I felt comfortable telling her the truth.

“It was a memory of when I asked my mom if I could play with dolls like my friend Rachel,” I admitted, while blushing furiously.

“How did she take it?” Rowan asked, face filled with concern.

“Really well, actually, she took me to get several the next day,” I answered, smiling at the good parts of the memory.

“Well, I’m glad you have such a cool mom.”

“Me too.”

We spent the rest of the morning talking about our childhoods and how much things had changed since then. I noticed, however, that whenever I tried to learn about Rowan’s early childhood, she would deflect with some funny anecdote from when she was in her hundreds. I only hoped that in time Rowan would trust me enough to let me in to those parts of her past. For now, though, I was content to spend my day with the best roommate I ever had.