Chapter 29 – Part 2
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The next half hour or so was like assisting one of those amazing magic shows on television. All I had to do was speak the name and the quantity, and there it was right in front of me — rice, milk, water, bread, yogurt, peach juice, chocolate cream cookies. Thirty minutes was all it took to restock the fridge and freezer, and all the empty cupboards.

The rest of the day went by slowly.

I took the chance to put my studies in order, and solve some of the next lessons, taking into account that I’d probably be missing school for a few more days. I made a mental note to call Joanne later on and ask her about the classes I’d missed, and maybe even give her some sort of excuse that she could pass along to the rest of my classmates.

I read and replied to my mother’s e-mails and even managed to laugh at the description of a party she apparently had gone to. I really missed her constant good humor and open and cheerful character. I was glad to know she was having fun and asked for more photos of the extraordinary event, since she’d only sent me one of herself, dressed in a beautiful dark-blue evening gown, standing on a stone balcony, somewhere away from the city.

Once I got tired of my school stuff, I grabbed a book and sprawled myself on the bed. It seemed like forever since I’d last read something. It felt really good, allowing myself to submerge into another story, into another world, as time went by me unnoticed.

I must have fallen asleep because, when I realized it, I was back in that dark place with the cold, hard stone floor. Michael was lying at my feet, bleeding, his white shirt slowly becoming red, and yet he kept staring at me, his green eyes fixed in a silent accusation that made me take a step back. His pale, discolored lips moved, slowly pronouncing my name, and I recalled what Gabriel had told me about what happened when Deiwos took a life away. I immediately wanted to get out of there, to run away, but my legs wouldn’t obey me. And, when I looked down, I saw that black shadows were wrapping themselves around my ankles and knees, like giant snakes, making it impossible for me to move. I tried to make them release me, kicking and pulling them, but the more I fought the more they squeezed their cold embrace, climbing up my legs, hurting me.

“Mariane!”

His voice woke me with a startle, leaving me tense, and I looked around still feeling lost. I only relaxed when I saw him, sitting at the edge of my bed, making sure to keep some distance in order not to scare me.

“Hey,” I greeted him with a smile, sitting up, and noticed I’d fallen asleep while reading my book. The gray light pouring in from the window was getting dimmer, and I knew it must be early in the evening.

“Are you all right?”

“It was just a dream,” I replied and looked away so I wouldn’t be captivated by the beauty of his face, which seemed to happen more frequently day by day. “Any news?”

“She escaped again,” he replied in a harsh tone. “I’m starting to get tired of this game of cat and mouse. I’ve never been one to have enough patience to endure hunting games. I hate having to sit still, waiting for the other party to make a mistake. It’s truly annoying!” he complained and I couldn’t help laugh at his unwilling expression.

“You can always use me as bait again,” I suggested, pulling my knees up against my chest. In truth I really didn’t want to have to go through all that again, I thought, my stomach turning just at the thought. However, just to see his outraged expression was worth taking the risk of him agreeing.

“Not a chance!” he declared in that tone that wouldn’t even admit discussing the issue and then, as I couldn’t help my persistent smile, he seemed to notice my trap, relaxing a bit. “I do not want to see you even close to any of them again!”

I nodded, not wanting to counter him on that, and tried to move on with our talk.

“And Lea?”

“He’s downstairs. He and Sigweardiel are making culinary experiments, since they have so many new ingredients.”

“New ingredients?” I repeated, in complete alarm mode, and then sighed knowing it would be completely useless trying to make them behave like normal people. “And there go my provisions,” I lamented and he smiled, dazzling me since I still hadn’t gotten used to seeing him show me those kinds of gentle expressions. “So, have you returned a long time ago?”

“Some. I’ve been sitting here, watching you sleep,” he tranquilly admitted while I couldn’t help blush. “And I was thinking just how much smaller and frailer you look while you are sleeping. And then I couldn’t help wonder how someone as ... breakable as you could so easily sleep in my arms, like you did yesterday. You’re either quite insane, or stupidly naive.”

I frowned, annoyed, asking myself if he was trying to pick a fight. “I trust you!” I argued and he smiled coldly.

“My point exactly,” he replied and I sighed, offering my hand to him like he’d done so many times to me. He looked at it for a moment and finally ended up accepting my silent invitation, softly brushing his fingers against mine. I held his hand the way he didn’t dare hold mine, and pulled him to me. And his body yielded before my insignificant strength and fell over the bed. I stretched my legs so he could use them as a pillow and smiled when I saw him close his eyes, as if he’d just fallen asleep.

I touched his soft, cold hair, playing with the dark strands between my fingers and couldn’t help think about how much things had changed. The sweet scent that enveloped made me dizzy, for a moment, and when I noticed it he’d raised his body enough so that his face was standing right in front of me, irresistibly fascinating. I didn’t dare move, knowing that if I did I wouldn’t be able to resist the desire to touch him. He slowly leaned his head, coming even closer, and stopped almost touching my neck, making me shiver at the anticipation of his cold touch. I heard him take a deep breath, as if he wanted to fill his lungs with the air around me, and then he fell silent for what felt like a long time.

“Mariane.” His whisper made me shudder, the warmth of his breath making my heart beat even faster, and I clenched my fists over the quilt.

“Just stop that and kiss me,” I commanded between my teeth and he moved very slowly, so he could look at me again, his lips so close to mine that I could feel the cold of his skin.

“Not today. I really don’t think I’ll be able to control myself if I do.”

His words sounded closer to an irresistible challenge. Somehow, and although I knew it was for my sake, knowing he was constantly restraining his own will made me angry. I didn’t want him to restrain himself at all! I wanted him to kiss me. And touch me. And be at least half as crazy about me as I was about him. And so, before he could pull back, I wrapped my arms around his neck and pressed my lips against his, applying all I had learned from his own lips, making sure he would never say my kisses were childish ever again. I felt him recoil and I kissed him even more passionately, holding him with all my strength, although I knew he could easily push me away.

His hands touched my waist, shaking and hesitant, and for a moment tried to gently break us apart. However, in the next instant, they were pulling me against him, and pushing me down on the bed. His lips took absolute control over mine, and I found myself breathless and gasping for air. My body was burning up, my brain melting inside my head, and I hugged him not knowing what to do with that destructive force raging inside me. His hands easily tore the collar of my sweatshirt, uncovering one of my shoulders which he ravenously kissed. His cold hands slipped under my sweater, his fingers digging into my ribs, and I bit my lower lip to silence the pain.

The air around us changed, became heavier and harder to breathe, and soft, silky cold strands of hair slid over my neck. When I managed to focus enough, I noticed he was no longer kissing me, or moving, his body trembling just as much as mine. His fingers were still painfully buried between my ribs, almost as if he was about to stab me to death, and the air escaped through his lips in a bitter hiss.

“Please ... stop me.”

The shock that washed over me felt like a bucket of cold water had just been poured down my head, and I was suddenly frozen in place, unable to move even an inch. It was the pain that brought me back to life, as his fingers dug even more into my skin. I slowly tried to move an arm and it was all it took to transform his cold fingers into daggers. I clenched down my teeth, bearing the pain, and placed a hand on his head, startled to feel how long his hair had become.

“Hush,” I whispered as if he were no more than a frightened child and tried to keep my breathing as shallow as possible to avoid any sharper pain. “I’m right here.”

“I want you desperately.”

My whole body burned up in response, back to that living hell at the sound of that whisper, but the pain spreading over my ribs didn’t allow my mind to lose itself in his words.

“I know. And I am yours, remember. My Soul belongs to you, Nyx,” I replied and he seemed to relax just a bit.

“Right now my mind is filled ... with images that I can’t control ... terrible images,” he admitted in a hoarse tone, and I slowly caressed his head, trying to calm him down.

“Don’t look, then. Look at me, instead,” I told him, and tried to make him move so that I could see his face. “Look at me, Nyx!”

He slowly moved his head sideways, resting it on my shoulder, and his violet eyes glowed with that frightening crimson color, his long hair falling over his face, casting dark shadows over his pale skin. I swallowed the lump of fear that clothed my throat for a moment and lightly touched his face, trying to stop my hand from shaking as he kept very still, staring at me with that deadly gaze.

“Tell me what you see.”

His fingers twitched, sending waves of sharp pain through my ribs, and I bit the inside of my mouth so it wouldn’t show in my face.

“My hands ... stained with your blood,” he spoke smoothly in that voice I loved so much, the words sliding through his motionless lips, and I felt frozen again. “I see me breaking your body ... I hear you screaming in pain ... I see you helplessly trying to fight me, as if you could ever win over me. Because I’ve never desired anything, as I desire you, and it’s something that I can’t control. Even now, knowing that I’m hurting you, smelling the pain and the fear on your skin ... my desire to have you is stronger than my will to let go of you.”

I gently pulled back the long strands of hair that were falling over his face and smiled as I noticed that his dark words had only made me love him even more.

“It’s okay. I don’t mind staying here with you, forever if that’s what you want. In truth, I wouldn’t even mind dying here, in your arms, if I didn’t know how much it would ... hurt you,” I dared guess and he closed his eyes, sighing deeply. His fingers seemed to lose a bit more of their strength and I could breathe more at ease, as I patiently straightened his hair.

“I can’t allow myself to lose you, but, no matter how much I try to ... how much I think about it, I just can’t understand what binds me to you. The only thing I know is that it’s so strong and intense that it overpowers everything else ... all my other thoughts and desires. And then everything is mixed up, because the only thing I know that feels like this is the effervescent excitement of trapping someone and ... tearing them to pieces. And I know you don’t understand, but the tearing of flesh, and the breaking of bones, the warmth of the blood, its acrid metallic smell ...”

I felt my stomach turn and placed a hand over his lips, silencing him. I regretted my gesture immediately, but already too late, knowing I’d just reacted like a mere Human. I recalled the talk I’d had with Alexander that morning. It was exactly as he’d told me. Gabriel didn’t know anything else besides that world of darkness and his mind tried to place everything else inside the few categories and emotions he’d acquired in there.

I swallowed hard, trying to pull myself together, and faced his eyes that looked coldly and attentively at me.

“You’re saying that ... inside you, your desire for me blends with your desire to kill me?” I had the courage to ask but he didn’t answer. I silently caressed his soft hair and tried to understand what kind of damage that realization had made inside me, but I felt nothing beyond that ice-cold fear piercing my chest.

“You fear me, now? You know you should, don’t you?” he asked, without even waiting for an answer. “You smell of fear.”

I frowned, displeased with his conclusion, and pulled his ear, which tore an expression of surprise from his face.

“Stop making assumptions about what I may or not feel, based on my smell!” I scolded him. “When you do that I always feel like I’m talking to some kind of animal, or something!” He looked dumbfounded for an instant and then laughter rolled off his lips, releasing me from his threatening fingers.

“Really, an animal. Just like you to say something like that in the middle of such a gruesome and serious talk.”

I took a deep breath, relieved for being able to do it again, but the places he’d pressed still hurt, as if needles had remained embedded in my skin. His cold sneer told me he’d noticed too, and I faced him unwavering.

“Your eyes, when they have that red glow, they scare me,” I confessed. “And it’s not because I’m afraid of you. It’s just that I always feel that, when you look at me like that, you’re not really seeing me, you’re not really you. Almost as if part of you had been taken away. And I know it is you, and that it’s not like your unconscious or anything, but I always get the feeling that it’s not the you you want to be ... like you’re being pushed to do things that you really don’t want to do. And I always feel it must be very painful, and lonely for the real you to be forcibly swept away like that.” He averted his gaze, clearly disturbed by my words. “Of course I know I should fear you. I told myself that same thing over and over again, until I gave up. The same way I can’t just stop feeling the way I do about you, I also can’t start fearing you just because I should. I’m really sorry to disappoint you,” I added with a light smile, and he raised his head, resting it on his hand, so he could look at me.

I stared back at him, his eyes back to its violet color, his black hair falling over his shoulders, pouring over my bed. I was once more lost in the perfection of that image where nothing seemed out of place and raised a hand to touch him. His cold skin sent a tingling sensation through my fingers and he held it gently, placing a kiss on my palm, sending my heart into a crazed race.

“Just be still,” he told me, placing my hand over my chest. “I want to try something.” I looked at him suspiciously and he smiled. “Nothing dangerous, I promise. But I need you to be quiet.”

I nodded like a good girl and he smiled again before closing his eyes.

Even though I knew I should be used to it by now, I was still amazed when his long hair started to get shorter again, the air around us becoming lighter and easier to breathe. Gabriel frowned slightly, as if he were concentrating on something difficult, and his lips murmured soft words that I couldn’t understand. To my surprise, dark lines appeared on his skin, growing and stretching in elegant curves and thorny circles, up his neck, across his face and around his left eye. His forehead took on a glistening look and small droplets of sweat appeared over his skin. But his presence became even lighter until I could hardly feel him, even though he was right there, beside me. For the first time I was able to stop shaking and shuddering just because we were close to each other. And then I suddenly realized what he was doing and what those dark lines really meant, and my heart jumped into an urgent beat.

“Nyx!” I called him, angry, grabbing him by the collar of his shirt, ready to shake him if needed until he opened his eyes, but he just fell heavily on the bed, as if I’d pushed him with all my strength. I turned and squirmed to get out from under his heavy leg, and sat up to look anxiously at him. The black lines were still growing, now across his forehead, and I sat on his stomach, shaking him with all my strength. “Stop that! Just stop it! Open your eyes!” I demanded and my sight blurred, a bitter taste filling my mouth. “Can you hear me?!” I shouted and a tear escaped my control, sliding down my face and falling on his neck, burning his pale skin. I immediately dried my tears, frustrated for not being able to stop crying, and my sobs echoed all around us.

“That ... hurts.” His dragged voice silenced all the other sounds. I looked down at him, still in disbelief, tears streaming down my face, and he smiled lightly. “Are you crying, Mariane?” he asked in a weak and strained voice, raising a hand to touch me, and I quickly swatted it, pushing it away.

“If it hurts don’t touch me!” I complained and rubbed my eyes again, fiercely drying the tears on my sleeves, hoping they would just stop appearing.

“Are you angry?” he asked me, chuckling, and I looked back at him more than angry. My gaze fell on all those dark lines and the pain was so deep that my vision blurred again, sending new tears sliding down my cheeks. “Mariane.” I was dazed by the sound of my name in his voice and, when I noticed, his cold fingers were already drying my tears. I pushed him hard, pulling away, and used my sleeves again.

“Are you an idiot! What was that for?”

“It’s fine. This is nothing compared with the many marks I left on your skin.” I looked at him astounded and he smiled, although he seemed pensive about something. “Why are you crying? If you’re crying it means your Soul is suffering. I thought this would make it easier for you to be close to me.”

The ingenuity of his words left me even more frustrated, and I took a deep breath trying to at least control my Human feelings.

“You’re really an idiot,” I declared with a sigh and dried my eyes again. “Revert that!” I ordered and he frowned.

“I don’t want to. At least you’re not trembling anymore,” he pointed out, sounding proud of himself. And yes, suddenly being close to him was as easy and natural as being close to any of my schoolmates. But the pain inside me wouldn’t go away, nor would the persistent tears that kept flowing down my face.

“Are you a child?” I contested and sighed again as he seemed even more annoyed. “That’s ... painful, right?” I asked and he seemed intrigued. “That Seal, it’s cruel. It doesn’t just restrain your being, it crushes it.”

His eyes glowed dangerously and his hands pulled me by my sweater, making me fall at his side. His fingers wrapped around my neck, his face over mine so close that I could feel his warm breath, making me nervous and unsure, and a bit frightened.

“I’ve told you before, there are certain things you should not say.”

I touched his face, tracing the black lines, and couldn’t help smile at his surprising ignorance.

“Then I’ll tell you another of those things. I know you did this for me,” I said, following the lines down his neck and undid the buttons of his shirt that were in my way. “And yes, being able to touch you like this, not having to constantly tremble, is just ... incredible. But ...” I stopped, my hand in the center of his chest, over the place where all the lines converged into a strange eight-pointed star. “Your pain is my pain, my tears are for you.” He seemed confused, even more so when I locked my other hand at the back of his head and pulled him to me. “So, kiss me, Nyx,” I whispered into his lips and he did, with a soft, gentle kiss, and being able to feel his cold lips, without being constantly assaulted by that disturbing feeling that always reminded me of how different we were, was simply amazing. But even then, the pain persisted.

All I had to do was relax my body and I easily reached that point inside me where the inconstant ocean that were my feelings remained calm and unchanging. The warm wave that washed over me was brief, and the order that vibrated through all my cells, lightly touching my thoughts, was clear. Break the Seal.

Gabriel pulled away from me with a jump, as if I’d just stabbed him in the back, and looked at me with an incredulous expression.

“What the …?” I smiled, happy to see the dark lines on his face receding and disappearing, and my tremors returned as his presence became stronger. As he understood what had just happened, his expression changed and the fury in his eyes made me recoil. “What was that for? After all I told you!”

“It was nothing,” I grunted, looking away.

“Mariane!”

The blast that filled the air was dozens of times scarier than his angry tone, making me cover my ears, my heart jumping inside my chest. When the silence returned I looked at him with a question on my lips, but received a warmer sweater and a coat that he negligently threw at me.

“Get dressed.” His whisper was cold and fierce, his face a mask of ice.

I obeyed automatically, pulling the sweater over the other torn one, and a new blast echoed through the walls, making me cower. It was as if the walls, the floor, the ceiling, the whole house, were about to explode.

“What’s happening?” I managed to ask and he gave me a pair of boots, but didn’t answer me.

“Suileabhan.” His ice cold whisper echoed throughout the entire room and a tall boy with silver eyes appeared out of nowhere. “It’s time. Just like we planed.”

He nodded in silent agreement and walked over to me, bending to gently grab me by my arm, pulling me to my feet.

“Lea?” I asked, confused, and he smiled gently.

“Everything’s fine, Mari,” he assured me and the deep tone of his gown-up voice, together with his teenager appearance, left me lost for a moment.

“Go.” Gabriel’s whispered voice woke me from my trance, and Lea pulled me closer, wrapping his arms around me, and I finally understood what was going on.

“No! No way! Let go of me, Lea!” I demanded, pushing him back with all my strength, but he didn’t even budge, his arms around me feeling like an iron chain.

“It’s just for a bit, Mari,” he told me delicately and I turned to Gabriel, stretching my arm as much as I could, trying to reach him.

“I want to stay! It is my wish to stay!” I said in one breath, recalling the strength my wishes had always had, but he just smiled with that gentle expression.

The room around me spun, covering me in darkness. I felt dizzy, and sick to my stomach, and had no other choice but to hold onto Lea, afraid I might fall in the dark precipice beneath my feet.

* If you want to know more about this book or simply access earlier updates, please visit the official site at http://carpersanti.net/gaea/

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