Internet-Degenerate

Fun fact: It's okay to admit to your mother that you're cold, even though she told you to wear something warm.

The time for the final battle had arrived. Chloe and I arrived at the headmistress's office. I ran into Chloe almost right in front of the door, but she didn't respond when I addressed her, and she studiously avoided eye contact. 

"I do not approve." The headmistress stated such as soon as she saw us. I was expecting a tongue-lashing, so it wasn't really surprising, but her sternness is scary. She had fair, pale skin and long, black hair that was as dark as the night that she tied up into a bun... why does she seem so familiar? "To see violence in Vincennes, which prizes harmony above all else. When I first heard the news, I could scarcely believe my ears."

"I wouldn't say it was violence, ma'am," I speak up, trying to mitigate the punishment we'll receive.

"What?" She mustn't have heard me correctly. I need to be clearer.

"I wouldn't say it was violence, ma'am. There wasn't any harm done."

"What are you talking about?" She asks incredulously. "You have a large bruise on your cheek!" At her words, I put a hand on the cheek that Chloe slapped. I poke it and feel nothing. I don't feel any bruise. What is she talking about?

"Uh... I don't know how to tell you this, ma'am, but... this isn't a bruise," I say, pinching my cheek. "It's just a mark."

"Semantics," she tells me, tapping her fingernail on the desk in irritation. "For heaven's sake... one week, and you're already causing trouble. I expected this, but... This is why I was opposed to this. This just proves how thoughtless it is to allow boys to enter an all-girls school. Of course, there's nothing to be done about it now. The board already voted on it. …However." She cut off sharply and fixed me with a cold gaze; her eyes narrowed. "This violence is a separate matter from that of your scholarship. As the person tasked with running this school, I am obliged to ask what the cause of all this was. So? What on earth could it have been?" That's a good question, ma'am; I don't know myself. I checked on Chloe with my peripheral vision. Her head was bowed deeply, her eyes fixed on the floor. "What is the matter? Explain yourselves already." The headmistress grows impatient. 

"... I'm sorry," Chloe says meekly. The headmistress's expression didn't soften in the slightest; on the contrary, her expression became sterner. 

"Who asked you to apologize? I asked you to explain yourself." Her orders were followed by silence. "...You don't intend to tell me? Chloe Shirley, are you defying the headmistress's request?" More silence. The headmistress let out an irritated sigh. "For heaven's sake... This is what we get for accepting Final Course tourists." I don't understand what she means by the term' Final Course tourist,' but Chloe's shoulders began to tremble at those words. Looks like I have to talk.

"Ma'am?"

"What is it?" She's very irritated.

"Truth is, I owed her a CD," I lie through my teeth. 

"A CD?" The headmistress asks, sceptical. 

"Four years ago, I broke Chloe's favourite CD. I still haven't gotten her a new one, and, uh... that's... that's why she's mad." I think I managed to convince her with that. 

"...Surely you have a more convincing lie than that." Guess I didn't.

"It's not a lie, ma'am," I lie.

"Chapter 9, verse 43 of the Gospel of Mark states, 'If your hand causes you to sin, cut it off... for that is at least better to burn in the fires of hell.' Seraph Thorne. I believe it would be better for you to cut off that tongue of yours."

. . .

Well, shit. I have no idea how to respond to such excessively cruel words. That shit's in the Bible? I oughta give it a read some time. 

"Salutations." A small voice rang out through the office, and a fragile old lady wandered into the room. 

"Madame Chairwoman..." The headmistress clearly wasn't expecting her company. "What are you doing here?"

The chairwoman giggled. "I was worried you might be harassing Seraph," she says with a smile.

"Unthinkable. I would never harass a student." 

"Chapter 9, verse 43 of the Gospel of Mark states, 'If your hand causes you to sin, cut it off... for that is at least better to burn in the fires of hell.'" I can quote bible verses too. Two can play at that game, headmistress. "Just putting that out there." After my perfectly delivered comeback, the chairwoman turns her head and suppresses a snicker. The headmistress glared daggers at me. I'm dead now, but it was totally worth it. 

"Now, then," The chairwoman speaks up before I'm slaughtered. "What have you talked about so far?" 

"I was just explaining what caused the fight," I tell the chairwoman. 

"You should speak more precisely," the headmistress tells me. "I believe you mean 'I was just bearing false witness.'"

Yowch. 

"Oh, dear." The chairwoman heaved out a sigh and smiled in amusement.

"Alright. Here's the truth," I lie. The headmistress asked if I had a more convincing lie, so I came up with one that she should agree with. "It's Spring, after all, so I lifted her skirt. That's why she smacked me." Perfect. As the head of the traditionalist faction, the headmistress should have no problem believing that. She'll accept it, we can leave, and I can nap. The plan is perfect. My genius frightens even myself.

"How long do you intend to lie to us?" She didn't even believe that? How very shrewd of her...

"Now, now, Madame Headmistress." The chairwoman speaks up. "It's clear that Seraph wants to forgive and forget. Isn't that enough?"

"But as the school administrator, I cannot-"

"Jesus himself said many times, 'Hate the sin, but love the sinner.' Seraph. Do you forgive Chloe for striking you?"

"Yeah," I answer. "I couldn't possibly care less about it."

"Then isn't that enough?" The chairwoman turns back to the headmistress. "If we can just reach a compromise there..."

"...I understand what you're saying, Madame Chairwoman," the headmistress says. "However... I believe that is overly lenient. This matter is not merely between the two of them. It concerns all of Vincennes. The vessel of Vincennes has remained pure and pristine for all this time. Now, a single drop of mud has entered it. A single drop that cannot be allowed. After all, who can expect to drink muddy water?" Huh? Are you not supposed to drink muddy water? What have I been doing most of my life?

"I believe you're incorrect, Madame Headmistress," the chairwoman shoots back. "Seraph is not mud. The mud has been here since the beginning." Oh shit, is she inadvertently referring to the headmistress? "This school has been collecting sediment all throughout its long history." I guess not. "Seraph is a stone that has stirred up that mud... It is only natural that our vision be obscured for a time."

"Sediment..." The headmistress seems baffled. "Excuse me, but I can hardly believe what I'm hearing. I cannot contain my outrage at your words," she said calmly. 

"If the word 'sediment' is too strong for you, you may replace the word with consciousness," the chairwoman suggests. "Vincennes... has the tendency to lock a person's mind in place. For better or worse, it is a powerful force. Of course, I am well aware that you have a different opinion on the matter, Madame Headmistress."

"...Very well," the headmistress buckled under the chairwoman's argument. "Then, in deference to you, Madame Chairwoman, I shall concede the matter today." The headmistress turned back to Chloe and I. "You may go."

"Yes, ma'am." Chloe and I speak simultaneously and leave. As soon as we go, I heave out a heavy sigh. 

"I talked so much back there," I complain to myself.

"...Were you trying to cover for me there?" Chloe asked.

"Huh?"

"The way you lied."

"Yeah. Obviously."

"Well you won't be getting any thanks from me," she says. "I'm... I'm never going to forgive you, you know."

"Well could you at least tell me why you won't- no, you're just going to leave, okay, bye-bye." I talk at Chloe's slowly departing figure. 

"Oh, my," the chairwoman says to me as she stumbles out of the office. "I can see you two still have a conflict."

"It seems so..." I tell her.

"There's no need to worry," she reassures me. "Youth is a time for strong emotions. That is what I believe, at least. Now, we should go. Seraph, why don't you return to your dormitory?" As we walk back together, I ask her something that's been bothering me.

"Ma'am, earlier, the headmistress referred to Chloe as a 'Final Course tourist.' What does that mean?"

"...Ah... Did she say that? I had hoped that changing the discussion to co-education would put that matter to rest..." Other than those few cryptic words, she didn't address my question at all. I'll have to ask Sol or Tabby when I get the chance later since nobody else seems to want to talk to me.