Chapter 11 - I - Madelaine Ann Rubinforth's resolution

 

**Madelaine**

 

It was said that the gates of heaven were of pearly-white, and its streets were made of gold…

 

“…”

 

However, I could only give a glance at those supposedly ‘precious’ things.  I didn’t even care about those.

 

“…”

 

Because, in all honesty, I never needed them.  A rich and powerful husband?  A big, opulent house in the country?  Maids and guards that attend to my needs and safety?  Those are trivial things compared to what I’ve found…

 

I’ve got someone who understands and stands up for me.  Even though he could be pretty detached, or his head was full of weird ideas, he only desired the things that would make me genuinely happy…

 

“Kuro…”,

 

And what did I do to repay him?  I only got him trapped in this world that wasn’t his own.  I got him involved in my stupid whims and tantrums.  And in the end, he had to be killed…all because he wanted to help me…

 

“…”

 

I think now is my time to give back all that I can to this man who always stood by my side.

 

“!!!”

 

“Ah!  You’re that saint named Maddie, right?  If I remember, you’re the…”

 

“The Human Saint.”

 

“Ah yes!  The Great Saint of Chersea!”

 

“I’m indeed the saint, but I’m not great, Mister Peter.” I replied to the doorkeeper, “And I come here to plead to the gods.”

 

“Oh, right!  Right!” the old man with a rooster on his arm then took out a golden key and unlocked the big pearly-white gates of heaven, “Don’t worry, Maddie.  I’m sure the gods would like to hear your petition.”

 

“Thank you for your help, old man.”

 

“Yes, my pleasure, dearie!” the old doorkeeper smiled gently, “Go on now, my child.  They’re waiting…”

 

With the pearly gates open, I took my steps inside into the majestic palace made of gold.  If I remember correctly, this was one of the splendid palaces of the gods.  If I made it past those golden pillars, I’m sure I’ll be in the holy presence of the High King of the gods, the great Creator…

 

“…”

 

“Oh!  Welcome my child!  What brings you here?”

 

“!!!”

 

I saw another old man with a gentle yet dignified look on his face, sitting on a gold and ivory throne set upon a pedestal.  He was looking outside as if he’s in deep reflection.  I knew him though, for, in contrast to the majesty of this place, his simplicity always stood out.

 

“Thank You for allowing me into Your audience, oh Great Creator, the High King of the Gods of All Realms.”

 

“I won’t turn my back on a beautiful soul that cries out to me for help.” he replied, “So, what is it you want?”

 

“Your Majesty…if I may be selfish for a bit, there’s a person I’d like You to help…”

 

“Yes, that boy named Kuro.  It’s a pity that he had to die like that…”

 

“Lord, why did that happen?” I could hear my voice quiver as I looked into my hands.  My vision was muddled; I was about to cry, “I tried to heal him, but my powers would not work!  Where did I go wrong?”

 

The High King could only stare at me with sadness on His face.  He then stood and reached for me as tears flowed from my eyes, “My child, you must remember that he was someone from a world under another deity.  Have you forgotten the agreement of the gods about this?”

 

“But Your Majesty, that person…”

 

“Yes, I know.  However, to do that, I’ll have to break the oath I swore to uphold.” He gently explained to me, “Do you want Me to do that?”

 

I could not answer that question of His.  Truth be told, my heart desired to see Kuro once again.  However, for that to happen, the High King of the heavens would have to go against His nature just to accommodate me.

 

“…”

 

“What is your answer, my child?”

 

“I…” I took a deep breath and continued, “My Lord, You know of my heart’s desire; I want to be with Kuro if I have to move the heavens for that to happen.  That’s why I appear before you pleading…”

 

Now it’s the High King’s turn to be silent as He listened to my selfish request.  

 

However, I couldn’t help but continue pleading and eventually knelt before the High King, “Lord, won’t You help him?  He died because of my selfishness—and I know I’m still being selfish here—however, I just couldn’t bear to live with that thought in my heart.  I’m ready to carry any responsibility You’ll put on my shoulders once You break Your oath with the rest of the gods…”

 

Another round of silence followed.  I never tried to stand up, though my knees hurt from the prolonged kneeling I’m doing before the High King.  

 

If I have to do this for an eternity, I will.

 

And then I heard the High King sigh.  I felt His hand on my head, patting like Kuro did whenever I needed comfort…

 

“Of course, you don’t have to do that, my child.  I won’t ask you to remain here for an eternity, so please stand.”

 

With some difficulty, and with the High King’s help—my legs just ‘died’—I stood up before Him.

 

“You’re a pure soul, that’s why the power of the gods was given upon you.”  The High King then asked me, “But, are you sure you’ll want him to live at this certain point in time you mentioned?  Don’t you want him to live right at the moment he died?”

 

“Yes, my Lord.”

 

“You’ll end up with that Imperial Prince in marriage, you know.”

 

“If it is Your will, my Lord, then I’ll accept any punishment for my sins.  I just don’t want him to suffer any more for me…”

 

“Hmm…you don’t want him to suffer, and yet, you’re missing something important about him…”

 

I could only feel the beat of my heart stop.  I know what He means by that…after all, Kuro did all that he had done so far just to help me.

 

“I could return Kuro to his world if you say so.” The High King offered.

 

“That’s…”

 

“What’s your decision, my daughter?”

 

“…”

 

Honestly, with what happened to Kuro, I just wanted him to be safe.  I don’t wish to see him all bloodied again, like what I saw before.  His lonely, lifeless eyes that stared into the sky when his spirit departed…I don’t want to experience it again!

 

“…”

 

But I still wanted him to be with me!  I wanted to talk to him more; I wanted to get to know him more!  He’s something I never want to lose…

 

“I…Your Majesty, please…I want him with me.”

 

The High King was silent.  Seeing that I already had a decision in mind, he continued, “Alright then, please speak no more.  I understand your position.  However, please note this; if you don’t change your heart soon, you’ll only cause suffering for the ones who love you.”

 

“Yes, my Lord.  I know of my mistakes, and I’ll strive to correct them for as long as I live.”

 

“Ah, it’s good that you have learned from your mistakes.” the venerable old God patted my head, “I forgive you, my child.  Now be at peace…”

 

A warm, peaceful feeling then entered my heart, and it felt nice.  A few moments later, I saw myself back in my private study at my father’s place here in Chersea…