Kass wasn't sure if the man took her for a complete idiot or if her guess was right and the man hit his head, probably multiple times...

After she'd calmed down and slowed her pace the subtle changed in the wind reminding her of another problem the idiot slapped on her. Her side was covered in river muck where he'd run into her... 

Looks like I'm going to have to wash them all over again...

A short walk later and a few hills behind her she finally saw her home. It was a small wood cottage with everything she could ever want for and more. A small personal garden, a rope swing left by her father that even to this day hasn't shown any signs of wear and inside a cosy room all to herself. 

 

She'd have a hard time explaining to her grandfather why she smelled and looked like she'd fallen into the river but honestly she was just glad the Moggs were dumb enough to actually think she was a threat, otherwise she probably wouldn't be returning till dusk...

Earthen shards definitely looked flashy enough as a spell but she really maxed herself out just conjuring the extra 4th... It would have been a miracle if she could even hit anything with it, let alone it being powerful enough to cause any serious harm. Gods knew even if she aimed all 4 shards at the same Mogg the worst that would happen is it would endure a lot of pain for a day or two before recovering...

 

"I'm home!" 

Kass shrugged off all the unhelpful thoughts and decided to get her business done sooner rather than later. The fields still needed rejuvenating before the next high moon, otherwise there'd be no way they could fill in the extra for the new Tax and pay for her grandfathers visit to the medicine house. 

 

"Welcome back... I see you've had an interesting outing, care to explain why you're dripping on the good carpet?"

Her grandfather was a man somewhere in his later 60s, she'd asked him a few times for his exact age but he'd always just say "Late 60s" before changing the topic. 

 

"A man fell in the river and seems to have hit his head... and also mysteriously lost all his stuff, cloths included. Forgot which way he entered town from... Oh and forgot what a Kocak is before lying about searching for his sister.... A very troubled man." 

While filling her grandfather in on her odd meeting kass was busying herself with fetching a small lock box from under her bed. Inside were the coins of her personal savings, She grimaced seeing the sharp decrees in its contents after taking only 5 copper.

Should be enough for a night at Briths place, though I doubt he could haggle in a meal to go with it...

 

After hiding the box in its usual spot Kass didn't wait around to drip any more of a trail. Ditching the dirty cloths and after tossing a bucket of water over herself it wasn't long before she was heading out wearing a fresh set of simple cloths and her spare pair of suspenders.

"If you want a mid day snack I left a few Boba fruits out on the dining table, I should be back around dusk after planting the new Calk reeds."

Kissing her grandfather on the forehead she hastily left just as swiftly as she'd arrived.

 

Her grandfather chuckled at the little squall coming and going just as fast as ever.

"Stay safe out there, and make sure the fence is still intact. Can't have any of the moggs getting into the crops like last year."

And like that she was off again. 

 

 

After screaming and cursing the heavens for a hot minute and a half James finally got fed up with it all and went back looking at his status window. What most shocked him of all was something called Earth affinity (new). Focusing closer on it he expected the window to give him more details about it, and, it barely fucking did. 

 

"Well fuck me sideways and call me daddy even I could have fucking told me that."

Wait... can't Kass use earth magic? Maybe she could tell me more, like, fucking literally anything more than this dog shit excuse of an explanation.

He didn't want to go after Kass on the off chance they had American style gun laws around here of your usual hick 'Shoot first, make good life choices later' shtick.

Do these people even know what a boonies even is, what about moon-pies? or corn field raves?  They probably got some kind of festival shit going on at least during the Autumn... wait, is this place near the equator or one of the other hemispheres?

 

James had to shake himself out of his odd train of thought. The rapid fire series of event's really seemed to have locked him in high gear. 

Looking up from the creek James couldn't help but take in the sights and thankfully now the clear smell. If it wasn't blistering hot out with a sun burning with the righteous fury of a thousand house wives that just found out all their husbands were the same man he'd definitely put this in his top 10 most beautiful days to be out.

Laying his head back in the shade of a large rock he took a moment to try and compile everything that he'd just gone through...

 

I was getting ready to kick Jackson's fucking face in, there was glass breaking.. Fucking Ms. Potts' picket fence is sharp as fuck. And then some fucking frat bitches decided that night was a good night for fucking curb stomping some rando?

And then there was that crazy bastard calling himself a god... I was just going with the flow because he creeped me right the fuck out, but holy fucking false Idle Jesus Christ... I died!...

James didn't know when it happened, but soon he'd passed lala land lane and went strait off to the land of gumdrops, blackjack and hookers.

 

When kass made it back to where she'd left the odd man, she found him sleeping behind WayFinders Stone. The sight brought back memories of when she and some of the kids in town would come out and play knights and dragons or pretend to be wicked witches perched atop their mighty tower. After tiring themselves out they'd all gather in the shade to eat their snacks.. or nap the day away. 

"Sigh.. No time to join the man in dream land kass." 

Standing over the man Kass thought about her next course of action carefully before giving a mischievous smile. Reaching down she plucked a Thistle bristle from its stalk and began roughly brushing it passed the mans feet

"WAKE UP! THERE'S A WINGED SNAKE IN YOUR PANTS!" 

 

James was just barely through his first course of his three course dinner of Green Mogg Pork chops when the next thing he knew, he was back in the shade of the rock with someone screaming Snake in his ear. 

Leaping to his feet with all the skill and finesse of a drunken cat, James was shocked to find himself now precariously standing atop the rock that provided him his life giving shade... 

 

"Quite a spry fellow for your age ain't ya..." 

Kass was barely holding in her laughter as she tried desperately to keep a strait face.

 

James was barely paying attention as he repeatedly patted himself down, checking repeatedly in every pocket and cranny he could find. 

When he was sure there wasn't any snake he turned a hard glare at Kass..

"Are you trying to give me a fucking heart attack, I've already been through fucking death and back again today and trust me. You don't fucking wanna know whats after death." 

 

Kass raised an eyebrow at that one.

"Kashes is in charge of sinners and the damned so I wouldn't be surprised if you and her had a right old tea party considering that mouth of yours." 

 

James' mind blanked out for a moment before eventually rebooting with it's usual "Fuck me sideways" ring tone.

That's right, what did she say.. fucking 9 gods? Sweet fucking Jerusalem be damned I barely fucking survived one of these chuckle nuts and you're telling me I gotta fucking deal with 8 more!

James felt like the world suddenly lost all its colour. He already had to deal with a Jack Sparrow wanna be Big brothering all of his fucking conversations, but now he's gotta think about 8 more... 

 

Noticing Kass looking progressively more worried he decided the best he could do was keep up the act. Steeling himself he put on his best poker face trying to to reassure Kass. However and unbeknownst to him, he has a terrible Poker face. 

"I see... so uh... You were gonna show me to town right?"