Where have I been? well, good question. For the last few months, I just focused on to revise and polish Volume 1 of my reverse life. And even print a book and sell it at the convention.
I probably would release the revised version soon here. But well, 'soon' is by Frieren definition. I will not delete everything in here. I probably would create new story for it, even thou is not a new story.
This world is not fair for everyone. I want to create a utopia where everyone is happy. But that's simply impossible. Happiness and sadness are a state of emotion that complement each other. When you are sad, little things can make you happy. When you are happy, a little mishap can ruin your happiness. That's why I learned that creating a utopia is not a solution. A small mishap can create a conflict that could spiral down and become huge.
Humans were once just simple creatures, but over time, humans changed. The more and better the lives people get, the more severe a conflict can occur. People would just find small things to complain about. That's how the world is. The more it develops, the more problems will occur.
It was weird that humanity would unite only in the most desperate situation. That's why unfairness occurs. To teach humanity a lesson. But not everyone will learn the lesson. And that's the sad reality we live in. Should we change this reality? That thought always comes to my mind. But for what reason? Why would I change the reality? Maybe because of her.
That girl is everything to me. She is the light, not just for me, but for everyone in any other world. Her safety is what drives this world's stability.
"And yet, you of all people send her into a dangerous place!! " I can't explain how mad I am.
I look at the witch in front of me. She is the bearer of creation. She creates life, the earth, the sun and the moon. Her name is Emilia, the witch of creation.
"Are you trying to fool me into thinking that you are not the one who wants to destroy the entire world and create a new one?!" She said with a haughty tone in her voice.
She is stubborn and believes she is right. But she simply misunderstood the entire situation. I always have the thought to reset reality. But I know is not the solution, that's why I seal my memories and send myself into the cycle of reincarnation. I did not anticipate myself to split in the process. The rational thought that prevents me from resetting reality is with me, and the other me only sees the short-term benefit of resetting reality. Everyone can only be happy together for only short amount of time. But she can't foresee that, she is stubborn and firmly believes resetting reality is the only way. That's why I make the seal on my memories even stronger. I give myself a trial to taste despair over and over. I want to teach my other self that even in despair, we can still be happy. But before my other self could learn a single lesson, that witch ruined everything.
"Do you really think I am the villain that would destroy everything for my selfish desire?" I ask the witch.
hearing my word, the witch stopped in his tracks.
"I have empathy, I have lived countless lives over many of my reincarnations. I've been a man, a woman, a bear, a tiger, an elf, a dwarf, a dragon, and a mermaid. I have lived with the rich and the poor. I have been a beggar, a world leader, a hunter, and being hunted. I can't, I just can't bring myself to destroy people's lives just because a handful of them are miserable. Maybe some of them deserve it, maybe some of them just have a stroke of bad luck. Live is like a wave, with ups and downs."
I said that with a lot of emotion.
"What's your point exactly?" The witch asked me.
"You are the one who ruins everything!" I said it with an angry tone
"That does not make any sense at all."
"The moment you intervene.... the moment you ruin everything."
No matter what I said, she would not listen to me. From the start, she doesn't want to understand me. I know it, yet I still try to reason with her.
"So please, move out the way..."
I unleash my full power without thinking about the consequences now.
"The more you hold me in place, the closer everything will be destroyed."
There's no need to hold back anymore.
