8. A: waking up

I woke up.

While looking at the unfamiliar ceiling in front of my face.

“ So is this the ceiling of my safe room?

Well, it’s still better than finding myself drowning in the ocean as a wake-up call again.”

Because I was thinking of what to do if, after dying, I were to wake up in that ocean of dead place.

But feeling relieved at that not happening, I stand from my bed, not wasting time, when ...

“ What the ...”

Thud.

I fell on my face.

And though it honestly hurts, that can wait.

Because I have a different problem here.

The fact that I fell clumsily on my face, that is.

"To think, I of all people would lose my balance and fall face first.”

But of course, it is not because I am trying to act cute, or anything, okay?

And if I were to try giving a reason, then it is probably because of the stats from leveling up.

As it seems I am still not used to this new power.

Not to forget that I was also mentally tired from the previous battle, to the degree that it had actually caught me by surprise.

Otherwise, I wouldn’t have fallen face-first like this.

Then feeling my tired mind like that, I end up taking a moment to rest and also enjoy the cold floor, before standing again.

This time taking control of my movement and feeling the difference in my power.

And speaking about that difference.

if my memory from my fight was correct, then when I leveled up for the first time, my ability was doubled, but at the end of the fight, when I leveled up once again, it only increased by about half.

So taking that into account, would mean...

“Status”

-Status :

Anon Zero Lv3

hp : 30

mp: 30

sp : 60

atk : 30

def : 30

agi : 30

Skills:

Observer - Analyse lv1 - Advanced sword mastery lv1 - Advanced spear mastery lv1 - Stamina lv1 - Sp enhance lv1 -

“Just as I thought, or not ?”

Calling my status, and then comparing it to my deduction.

It’s sadly different.

I mean, what is wrong with Sp?

Shouldn’t it be 30 too?

Also, if even my deduction is wrong, then where is my time to show off?

sigh.

Sighing while thinking about increasing sp stat, I try guessing the reason.

Though I am sure it’s clear, right?

“It is probably because of my new skills, I guess”

Though the question now, in which one of them?

And so, feeling curious about that, I try using the Analyze skill to find a clue.

“Oh, so it is Stamina, a skill that raises stamina.”

What a simple description.

And then finding it just like that, it’s case closed.

“So now looking back again, I got spear mastery from training for some hours, before the ratsStand, while stamina and stamina enhance were from overworking myself, hmm.”

After all, not only did I train hard in this room, but also fought an army of rats to death, while also leveling up twice.

So this is all.

Oh, concerning the training in this room, I have previously discovered that no matter how much I train inside it, I won’t get tired, with the same rule applying to my health, meaning I can’t get hurt inside this room.

Or more precisely, I get healed instantly inside, with no time even for blood to flow out of an open wound.

But the fun part is that this passive rule also applies to the supplies and weapons.

As such, no matter how many spears I took from inside the storage room, they will just regenerate again.

In simple words, it is an endless supply of weapons of all types.

And feeling excited about that, I end up smiling a little, when...

“Yawn. Is it sleep time already ?”

I start feeling sleepy.

This is normal, when thinking about it all the time, I was training and fighting here.

Still, the real-time and the game time are different.

because time inside is actually a whole 10 unit.

What should be the max for other games, is the norm for this one, because of the SR drive.

But even so, I don’t feel like staying too much today, as I have things to do tomorrow.

And so I choose to log out.

Is what I would like to say, but honestly, the SR drive doesn’t really need such an option, because it uses the resonance.

Simply put, while I am indeed playing the game, it is not like I was completely inside.

But instead, I was accelerating only one part of my mind, to resonate with the game world, while my other part is awake.

A little hard to use, but not impossible.

As such I am indeed inside the game but at the same time, I am standing in my hospital room preparing to turn off the drive.

And from what I read in the user manual.

It is possible to choose between three states when using the drive.

The real-world state: completely disconnected.

The complete dive: completely inside the game.

And lastly the resonance state: splitting your conscious into both sides.

And of course, I was using the last, as it is the newest technology presented in the drive, and the reason for it being a new experimental gear.

But stopping this train of thoughts, I turn down the drive, as I feel my connection with the game avatar of me disappear.

Though just as that happens,...

“Haa,...”

I lose my ability to breathe.

“ Pant, Pant.”

Then following that, I end up falling to my knees, and unable to move.

As I pant, while barely breathing.

“T-to think the p-pain would be this m-much .....”

As if drowning, or maybe having a hole in your lungs, it is such a sick feeling. But at the same time, it doesn’t stop here, but instead, it just starts.

Feeling as if your flesh is being gouged, or maybe it is being eaten by some small worms?

I don’t know, as even thinking in this ugly state is hurtful.

Now calm down, me.

You don’t want someone to hear you.

If they do, they will start worrying and questioning you, and maybe tomorrow’s discharge will be postponed too.

You don’t want that, so ...

“C-calm down.

Inhale, exhale, slowly.”

“Inhale, exhale, Fuuh.”

Finally taking a hold of my breathing again, I try to stand.

Ouch.

And miserably fail, by falling on my knees once again.

Then trying again,...

I fail.

Maybe I should stay down, and wait a little more, before trying to stand?

And doing just so, I take a moment to organize my breathing a little, before trying to stand again, when...

“Hup. Tada.

I succede- Cough, cough.”

Shit, that was uncool.

But yes. that is one of the setbacks of having a chronic illness.

Though in my case, I may be better than some others.

Yes, indeed, my life is limited, with a remaining life span of three months.

But hey, at least I had a normal?? childhood, Right?

Well, to some degrees, but...

That is not important.

What is important, is that I have gone to school, fought classmates, punched people, won tournaments, and played games.

So compared to some out there? Yes, I am better.

Though again, compared to the majority, I have a shitty life, .....

But even still.

It is my life, so it is my opinion that matter, nothing less, nothing more.

And anyway, It’s not like words, would change anything, so thinking about that is just a series of depressing and useless thoughts.

If, maybe, or could...

Such things are nothing but empty words, and possibilities.

And to someone dying with no hope of survival, they are nothing but poison.

Not like I can get worse than I already am, so I don’t think some little poison can affect my already broken world.

But leaving such a subject behind, I lie on the bed to rest.

While immersing myself in the memories of moving around with a healthy body as before my collapse, once again in my head.

And just like that, I fall asleep.

Though it may be a little early, it is not a big detail.

So, Good dreams.