“I had no idea you could cook, Fei,” Willow said, incredulous.

“Of course, I can! I had to learn it since mom was always too busy with work and dad left us when I was little.”

“Uh,” the goblin looked uncomfortable for some reason.

“Anyway! Here’s mana fruit pie version one! Please, my loyal taste-tester, tell me thy opinion of my creation!” I turned to Kelly.

She, in turn, stood there with her eyes wide open.

“You actually made a pie? How? Don’t you need like… flour? And sugar? And a whole bunch of other things?”

“Ha! Silly little loyal taste-tester, you! I have come across many an ingredient on my travels through the treacherous outside! With the help of our magical goblin friend, it was no issue to extract suitable substitutes!”

“Okay… Also, why are you speaking like that?”

I shrugged and grinned. “Why not? It’s fun.”

She seemed to instantly accept it as my entire reason.

“Alright then, my loyal taste-tester, it’s all yours!”

The demon looked at my amazing creation with suspicion before glancing at Willow who gave her a shrug.

She then closed her eyes shut, picked up the pie slice I cut for her, and bit into it.

…

The moment of truth.

She opened her eyes as she swallowed. “Uh, well it’s actually pretty good, honestly.”

I mentally pumped my fist. “Thank you for the praise, my loyal taste-tester!”

“But, err, the fruit alone is still better.”

“What!” I touched my chest with my hand. “Savage betrayal!”

Kelly cringed at that.

“I mean, it makes sense,” the goblin interrupted. “Demons eat mana, right? Those fruits are basically pure mana. And the pie is that, but some other non-mana things added. Of course, it would be worse.”

Argh! Did that mean that no matter how hard I tried, I would never be able to create a pie more delicious than its ingredients?!

“An impossible task?! A paradox?!”

“That’s not a paradox… Just how it is.” Willow shook her head.

“Bah! I’ll show you! Before that black bubble snuggles up to mine, I’ll present you with a dish more delicious than your demon tongue had ever tasted! A dish so wonderful, you will be slam dunking those mana fruits into the trash to get to it faster!”

“Wait, I said it was good! Why are you getting so worked up? You don’t need to do this!”

“Nonsense! I need to protect my honor! I won’t rest until the ultimate dish has been served!”

She deflated with a sigh knowing I won’t give up.

Yet another minion I had trained well.

With experiment number three point fourteen done, I had a dozen other experiments in mind. All putting my culinary mastery to the test.

Some montage music would have been great to set the mood, but unfortunately getting a boombox was impossible, even with Willow’s power.

But I didn’t need montage music! Even without it, I would achieve my goal no matter what!

My pie attempts turned into cakes, bread, lemonades, and other forms, but after rigorous experimentation, I decided to look at the problem from a different point of view, and ultimately landed on the one and only possible solution to the problem.

“Uhm…” Kelly looked at my masterful creation.

“It’s perfect isn’t it?” I grinned at her.

“That’s just the fruit itself though…?” She seemed confused. “It’s a bit redder I guess?”

“Tch tch tch, my dear taste-tester, this is more than just the original fruit! Take a bite and see!”

With a frown, the demon did as I said and bit into it. Her eyes shot open. “Oh my… What is this? It tastes nothing like the other fruits! It’s so much sweeter and delicious!”

“Hahaha! Victory is mine!”

“Wait, did you just find the reddest fruit you could and presented it as your dish…?” Willow ruined the moment.

“Of course, not! Who do you take me for? This right here --” I pointed at the fruit “-- is the finest product of my own blood, sweat, tears, and pee!”

“Wha-” Kelly jerked away from the fruit in her hands.

“It all came together like a puzzle!” I grinned even further, marveling at my own magnificence. “Since demons love mana so much, I simply packed that one fruit with as much mana as I could without it blowing up!”

Willow paled.

“Luckily for me, my bubbles had plenty of mana to work with, and I had no problem dispensing the mana straight into the fruit!” I laughed triumphantly.

“Wait! Does that mean that the fruit will kill anyone who isn’t a demon?”

“Probably.” I shrugged. “Irrelevant, though.”

“That is fascinating,” our resident ex-statue said. “Poison for one, a filling dish for another.”

“Well then! Now I have the perfect welcoming gift for my BFF! I bet she’ll love it!”

“Oh god…” Willow held her head. “An unleashed Fei and Reina together. This won’t end well.”

I couldn’t wait till we freed Reina!