My feet carry me as fast as they can out of the cafeteria and down the hall. My heart pounds in my chest, beating out a painful rhythm. I trusted him. I knew he was a guy, knew he was dangerous, and I still trusted him.

The cold air stings as I burst out of the school’s front doors, ignoring the half-hearted cries of ‘no, stop’ and ‘come back here’ from the security guards that hadn’t even bothered to look up from their phones when I ran by.. 

I need to get away. They can’t keep hurting me if they can’t find me. I just need to go somewhere where they’ll never find me. Sorry, Jen… I wanted it to work out. I really did.

Tears pool at the corners of my eyes, spilling forth. The pain in my chest builds. It’s going to hurt her so much to see me go… but it’s better this way. She’d just end up hurt one way or another, anyway.

I’m an unwanted disappointment, a defect, just like every other guy I’ve ever known.

Maybe I’d be worth something, worth trusting, if I really was a girl.

I force my eyes closed with a hard blink, and rub the tears away with my sleeve.

Back on the streets, everything passes in a blur. I know that there are eyes on me, people out on their lunch breaks, people that work odd shifts just seeing the city, tourists, homeless people… fellow homeless people.

I pick up my pace, ignoring just how foreign running in this new body feels. I just need to get used to it. That’s it. It’s only for a few more days, then I’ll be back to normal, right? Back to being a guy.

The thought sends a chill down my spine that has nothing to do with the cold air swirling up around my legs and under my skirt. Maybe running away in my school uniform wasn’t the best idea.

Keep running. Doesn’t matter where you go. Need to find new places to stay now. Pete knows some of the old ones. Can’t scrounge at the old restaurants either. Pete knows them. Jen would… wouldn’t be putting stuff out for me. Not after I ran away. She’d see the real me. A worthless leech. Garbage. She’d be glad I was gone, actually. Maybe she could adopt a real daughter, a real girl, one that wouldn’t disappoint her like me.

==========

I wasn’t sure where I was in the city. I’d taken several turns I had never taken before on back streets and side alleys. The alley I stood in now smelled strongly of a toilet, and had terminated in a dead end. I scanned quickly for a way out. Any way out. There, a gap in the fence! I could squeeze through!

“There she is!” one of the thugs shouted. They’d been chasing me for a few blocks now, ever since I wandered into ‘their turf’. It was a stupid mistake. I’d gotten sloppy in just a few days off the streets, apparently.

I bolted for the fence, crashing into the gap. My chest sent jolts of pain as I forced myself through the gap, headfirst, only for my hips to get stuck.

Cruel laughter echoed from the other side of the fence, which I could no longer see.

“Look here boys… She’s even offering herself up, now,” the one that seemed to be their leader laughed, louder still, getting closer.

I felt the sharp sting of his hand on my backside, and I couldn’t stifle the yelp that came as a result.

“Hear that? She’s a screamer, for sure. Don’t worry, sweetheart. Once we’re done we’ll be real sure to dump you where someone will find you so they can take you back to mommy and daddy. They don’t got a problem with ‘damaged goods,’ do they?” 

More laughter.

Stuck. Still stuck. Can’t get free. Can’t go back the way I came. Can’t keep going forward. Help. I’m going to be… They’re going to… 

“Hey!” someone shouted, further away than the thugs near me. “What do you three think you’re doing over there?” There was something eerily familiar about his voice.

“Who’s this motherfucker?” one of the thugs asked.

“No clue,” another answered.

“Move along, hero. Three of us versus one of you.”

“Perhaps you should count again and reconsider the odds,” the familiar voice said. 

“Freeze, no sudden moves,” another voice added.

More footsteps. My stomach was aching from my weight resting against it, trapped in this damn fence.

There were sounds of a scuffle, and the shouting of the thugs’ voices growing more distant.

Slow footsteps approached me. Had a thug made it past them? Was I still going to suffer?

“Are you alright, Ms. Carson?”

I never thought I’d be so happy to hear that dry, emotionless voice. Fresh, hot tears spilled over my cheeks.

==========

“How did you find me?” I asked when I was able to calm down. They’d taken me back to the nearest police precinct and settled me down in one of the interrogation rooms with a warm blanket and a cup of tea.

“Your watch,” Dobbs said, tapping his wristwatch. It was rather plain looking. Nothing near as fancy as mine.

I didn’t even know they could do that. I’d honestly forgotten I was wearing it.

“I need to ask you a few questions, Ms. Carson, if you feel capable of answering them.”

I nodded. “Just… call me Kat, please.” I couldn’t handle being ‘Ms. Carson’d’ a hundred times.

“Alright, Kat, let’s start with the big one then: What led you to running away from your school today?”

I inhaled sharply, remembering the cafeteria. Pete. Betrayal. Heartache. 

“It’s alright, Kat. Nobody can hurt you here,” Agent Dobbs said in his usual monotone.

Nobody? Everyone can hurt me. I probably deserve it.

“If you don’t feel comfortable talking right now, that’s alright. We can make arrangements for a place for you to rest. I just need to ask you one important question…”

I struggled to meet his eyes.

“Did you run because your guardian was abusing you?”

My eyes went wide. “No!” I screamed at him. “Jen would never do that!”

“Alright,” he nodded. “Would you be comfortable returning to her care?”

“I--” my voice caught in my throat. “I can’t.”

“Why not?”

“If I stay with her, I’ll just ruin her life. I don’t want to ruin her life.” Fresh tears were falling again, and I struggled to keep my grip on the mug in my severely trembling hands.

Dobbs was quiet for a moment, his expression as unreadable as ever, until he scooched his chair closer and put a hand on my shoulder.

I flinched from the contact, and he withdrew his hand. 

“Kat, I have spoken with Ms. Crowley, and I do not get the impression that you have in any way negatively impacted her life.”

“But I would, I would eventually.” Everything was going to pieces.

“That’s not true,” a familiar voice cut through from what I had assumed was a mirror. Suddenly, another police officer was visible, with Jen standing by her side.

She was crying.

I made her cry.

Now I’m crying too.

==========

Jen sat with me in the much more comfortable lounge. I had cried myself out, and despite the desire to keep sobbing, nothing came.

“Kat, I’m so sorry,” she hugged me tightly. “I shouldn’t have sent you to school. I should have kept you home.”

I shook my head slowly. “No… not your fault… Pete…” It was all I could manage to say. My voice sounded dry and broken. 

“Pete?” She pulled away a bit, looking down at me. 

“Ma’am, the girl who reported her missing is out front, she asked if she could see her. Is it alright with you?”

Jen looked at me. I nodded absently. She nodded back to the officer.

We sat in silence for a few minutes until a girl was escorted in by the officer.

“Kat!” she shouted, running over towards us. I recognize her as Home Room Girl.

Her arms are around me, suddenly.

“I was so scared when I heard what happened!”

Why was this girl scared? She barely knew me. How did she even know what happened? I’d have to ask her later.

“Cassandra, right?” Jen asked.

The girl nodded. “That’s right ma’am, Cassandra King, but please just call me Cassie.”

Jen seemed lost in thought for a moment, before asking: “Any relation to the Officer King that we spoke to?”

Cassie nodded. “Yeah, he’s my dad. He’s the one I called to report Kat as a runaway when I saw her bolt. I tried to catch up and stop her but she’s so freaking fast… it’s like she really is a cat!” she forced a laugh, which Jen joined in on.

That explained it. She knew what happened because her dad must have told her.

“Cassie, do you happen to know a ‘Pete’? Kat mentioned him being the reason she ran.”

“Pete? He’s one of my friends at school. Did he do something to you, Kat?” Cassie sounded immediately upset. Was she upset at me? 

“He…” I swallowed the lump in my throat. “He was lying to me. Lying the whole time. Didn’t actually want to be my friend. Didn’t want to be around me. He was using me. He was just going to… just going to throw me away…”

Jen hugged me close again, and I slumped against her side.

“I don’t understand… was this when you two went to middle school together?” Cassie asked.

Jen raised a brow. “I didn’t think you went to middle school.”

I shook my head. “I didn’t,” I said to Jen, then turned back to face Cassie. “Sorry I lied, I didn’t go to school with him.”

Cassie’s confusion only deepened. “What? How did you know him, then?”

“Because… before I looked like this, my name was… Kit.”

She looked like I’d slapped her or something. “Wait, like, homeless Kit?”

I nodded.

“Wait, so…” the gears seemed to be turning as she pieced it together. “So what he said at lunch today… you didn’t know that’s how he thought of you.”

I shook my head.

“Shit, I’m so sorry, girl,” she paused for a moment, then quickly added, “Oh, crap, I meant to ask this morning in class if you prefer guy or girl pronouns… I’ve just been using female pronouns...”

“It… it’s fine. I don’t mind if you treat me like… like a girl.” It’s true… I don’t even care anymore. Being a girl is the least of my worries right now. 

“Alright, just let me know if you change your mind later.”

I nodded.

“I promise we’ll talk to him. He owes you an apology for treating you that way, Kat.” Cassie promised, taking my hands in hers.

My eyes went wide and I shook my head quickly. “No, I can’t tell him! If I tell him, then...“ Then what? He’ll know? It’s not like he can think less of me, and I don’t exactly feel great towards him after this, either.

“Then what, Kat?” She asked, frowning. “You just go on hiding who you are? That’s not fair to you, you know?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know. I just don’t think I’m ready to tell him yet. It’s too… raw,” I said lamely.

She sighed, nodding reluctantly. “Alright, but you should definitely tell him soon. Especially if he hurt you that badly. I’ve been friends with Pete for a couple years and I think he’ll realize how messed up what he said was.”

“Cassie,” I mumbled, “why do you care about me so much? Why go out of your way like this?”

“Because that’s what friends do, duh,” she smiled. “Besides… I know how hard things can be for regens.”

“Wait… in home room you said… you ‘welcomed me to the club’... are you a…?”

She laughed softly and shook her head. “No! Not me, but my childhood friend is. I can’t tell you their name, but before he switched, she was my best friend, Brittany. We were friends all the way up from elementary school. When she got swapped in 8th grade, my parents wouldn’t let us hang out anymore. Said it wasn’t right for a boy to spend that much time with a girl. Ever since then we’ve kinda… drifted apart.” She looked away, frowning, before bringing her eyes up to meet mine.

“That’s why I don’t want you to end up dealing with this alone, Kat. Don’t go through what Brittany did. Okay?”

I nod slowly. “Yeah.” Great… now I have to figure out how to deal with this situation. More people offering me false friendship because they feel guilty about something, or because it’ll help them somehow. Cassie is just another Pete waiting to happen.