Interlude I — A Year in the Life of Hailey Winscombe

V.

Late September, about six weeks later, on a warm sunny afternoon at Hailey's apartment.

  Try as she might, Hailey couldn't seem to pull anything more out of the stone. She could summon up nearly-solid blocks of air, barely perceptible hazy outlines in the air that nonetheless felt like solid concrete to the touch. They never lasted more than a few seconds at most, but they were tangible things. They were a real result.

  It had been over a month and she still couldn't produce anything more than what she'd first managed. Still, for once she didn't feel quite so alone in her struggles. Neither of the others had managed to show much for their efforts. Jessica, lounging on the bed with her newly-dyed purple hair, was fiddling with an amethyst crystal and muttering to herself incessantly. Hailey was beginning to worry about her. Sometimes she seemed too determined — too narrowly focused on the magic. She was neglecting everything else. Laundry was beginning to pile up in the room, dishes stacking up in the sink, and Hailey was pretty sure (though she never brought it up) that Jess hadn't even attended two of her classes yet that term.

  Weston, on the other hand, had grown so distant that he'd stopped coming to their place. It had slowed from the exciting first few months where he'd spent almost every waking hour with them, reveling in their new discovery. Now they were lucky to get together once a week. It had been an emotional roller coaster for Hailey. First she was thrilled, since she was spending so much time with the guy she was sleeping with, and thought they might have actually had something. She'd later despised it as he'd become overprotective and neurotic, particularly after Ian left. Now, with their group having shrunk down to two, Hailey was beginning to miss him. She didn't want to get back together romantically, but Hailey would given anything for the five of them to just spend an afternoon hanging out.

  She'd had taken to staring out the window more often, lost in thought. Hailey liked watching the clouds float by. They reminded her of her goal and kept her focused and sane. When they gathered together in thick columns on a sunny day, Hailey imagined they formed vast kingdoms and mystical lands drifting in the sky. A deep and complex cloudscape was more breathtaking and beautiful than anything else nature had to offer, in Hailey's opinion. Even more so, it was a temporary fleeting thing — something that could only be seen by those watching at that precise moment before they morphed into something else and moved on, ushered away by the wind.

  Someday I'll be up there flying through them, Hailey promised herself stubbornly. She might not be making any progress lately, but it wouldn't stop her. Nothing would.

  Hailey noticed the room had gotten quiet. She looked back from her seat at the window at Jessica, who'd stopped muttering. Jess' eyes were wide, and Hailey recognized the telltale signs of revelation. She'd just figured something out.

  "What's the news, Jess?" Hailey prompted. She wasn't worried about interrupting an important thought. Jessica had asked them to speak up and force her to get her ideas out before they faded and became indistinct. Hailey was just doing her job.

  "The stone gave me an idea. I think I know how we can get more power out of them. Maybe even use multiple stones at once, if I have it right. I— I think I can even do permanent things." Jessica's voice was quiet and rapid, and Hailey strained to hear her clearly.

  "Permanent things?" Hailey asked, cautiously excited. If she could levitate herself permanently, was that the key to flight? It seemed like a clue.

  "I don't know what it would work with. Self and Mental magic, for sure. Other affinities might be a bit iffy. They don't have the proper permanence, they affect externalities and are manipulations of energy as opposed to modifications of internal energy by a directed feedback loop."

  "Slow down, Jess. I think I get what you mean though. This is about making permanent changes to yourself, right?"

  Jessica nodded. "I got the impression it's a lot more complicated than what we've been doing though. We just do simple spells, using our own energy or the energy of the gemstones and changing it to suit whatever we're trying to do. And even when we're using the gemstones, it's more like we've just borrowed the energy that was put into forming them. Past energy. We amplify it in some ways but it's not like we're overcoming entropy really, just misdirecting it.

  "But this," Jessica continued, her eyes flashing with excitement. She looked more awake than Hailey had seen her in days. "This could be big. I think I have a way to basically multiply output and loop it. Not infinitely, but in a way that doesn't require constant upkeep."

  "That sounds perfect, Jess!" Hailey clapped her hands together. "And you got this from your spells?"

  Jessica turned over her hand, showing the flecks of ash coating her skin. "Burned through another ten of them…" she trailed off regretfully.

  Hailey waved her off. "It's not that expensive, Jess. Don't worry."

  "I just don't want to be a burden—"

  "Don't even start," Hailey said. "With you living here full-time, we can afford it easy. It's just money."

  Jessica smiled, and Hailey could practically feel the warmth radiating from it. "Thanks, Hailey."

  "Hell, if you're really worried about money we could always rent out the other bedroom," Hailey went on, looking at the adjoining wall. "Since you just sleep in here with me every night."

  "Is that not okay?" Jessica squeaked nervously, her face tinged with pink again. Hailey felt like her face might become permanently blushed someday if she kept being so easy to embarrass. She laughed, trying to ease Jess' worries. Hailey didn't want to force her away, when Jessica was still clearly terrified of the outside. Hailey was still the only one of them who seemed even remotely comfortable out in the world, with the danger they all seemed to sense around every corner. If it took Jessica clinging to her in bed every night like a frightened kitten to feel safe, then Hailey was happy to oblige.

  "Are you kidding? I'd probably freeze to death without you. I've never known someone to hold on so tight while they were sleeping. You really know how to make someone feel loved."

  Jessica looked like she might spontaneously run a fever with how much heat had rushed into her face. Hailey resisted the urge to laugh again, changing topics instead.

  "So what's the name for this new magic?"

  "Oh! Uhh… Rituals, I guess."

  "Going all-in on the witchcraftiness?"

  "It just popped into my head," Jessica continued. She didn't need to explain further. Her particular brand of magic, which Hailey couldn't even begin to attempt without instant exhaustion and failure, lead to these ideas that they simply took for granted as truth. Jessica's skin finally returned to her normal, sun-starved pale shade. She was spending far too much time inside lately, Hailey decided. They needed to go out sometime and enjoy the last dregs of summer before the rain started pouring in.

  "How does it work?"

  "A lot of concentration, some materials, some guesswork," Jessica said. "I think it's about using the energy of the gems along with your own, and then it involves some powdered chalk and diagrams of some kind. It's a lot more concrete and directed than what we've been doing so far, actually. Almost like following a blueprint or a recipe. We just don't know any of the recipes," she trailed off again.

  "Do you have anything we could try to start off?" Hailey asked, eager to experiment as usual. She wanted a new challenge. Anything that might inspire her, or at the very least distract from her continuing failures to accomplish anything more than bumpy gliding and brief jumps in mid-air.

  "Well," Jessica said, her hand playing with her hair pointedly. "The first thing that came to mind was changing the appearance of something. Permanently, I mean, not that time we did my nails where it changed back once I let go."

  "You don't like the purple?" Hailey asked, surprised. Jessica had picked it out herself when they'd gone shopping, with Hailey's recommendation.

  "I changed my mind. Not really a fan," Jessica said, looking away. Hailey smiled knowingly.

  "Didn't catch the right eyes, did it? I think you needed to go more complicated than all purple. Your natural brown is actually really nice. I thought you could bleach part of it and do some cool highlights, transition into a color."

  "That sounds cool," Jessica said brightly. "I wouldn't even have to bleach it if I do this right. I can just change it naturally. Well, unnaturally, I guess," she added, giggling.

  "What color were you thinking?"

  "I don't know. Any ideas?"

  "Mmm," Hailey said, glancing out the window again, trying to think. Jessica followed her gaze.

  "How about that?"

  "What?"

  Jessica pointed out the window, at a gap in the clouds where the deep azure blanketed the depths of the sky. "That blue."

  Hailey smiled. "Perfect."

  Jessica got to her feet. "Do we have any chalk?"

  As it turned out, Hailey did, along with the rainbow moonstone Jessica had guessed would be the best reagent for the ritual. They marched into the empty bedroom with materials and kitchen tools, which had become their experimentation room. It was totally empty of furniture, just bare wood floor and empty walls. There was a fresh coat of paint on the wall to cover up the scorch marks from one of Hailey's days playing around with fire that had gotten a little out of control, and the floor was swept clear of dust thanks to the many bursts of wind she'd summoned in her quest to perfect the double-jump.

  Her landlord thought it was a bit strange, but didn't comment further except to remind her not to make any permanent changes.

  "Need me to do anything?" Hailey asked.

  "Can you cut the moonstone into four pieces? It doesn't need to be super even, I just need one for each point," Jessica answered, already starting to grind up the chalk into a powder in a bowl. Once she was done, she poured it out in a small circle, wide enough for someone to sit comfortably inside. She then drew out a specific shape around the outside, something like a diamond with curved sides that caved in towards the center to just barely touch the edges of the circle.

  "What is that?"

  "A hypocycloid," Jessica said distractedly, setting aside the bowl of chalk and taking the cracked moonstone from Hailey. She'd simply taken a hammer and nail to it, splitting it into a few discrete chunks with a bit left over. It was rough, but then Jessica had said it didn't really matter.

  "A hypo-whatnow?"

  "It's a shape formed by tracing a point on a circle rolling around inside another circle." Jessica set each of the chunks at the points of the shape, then started moving everything else out of the room, including the cushions and towels they usually kept laying around. Hailey got up to help, and between the two of them they had it empty in just a minute or two.

  "So why'd we empty the room?"

  "You don't ask until afterward?" Jessica said, looking at her funny.

  "I trust you. I'm still curious though. You need a lot of space?"

  "Not really," Jessica said, her voice catching slightly. "It's just to avoid interference. I'm not exactly sure what can interfere with the process, but I'm definitely sure it's a bad idea to disrupt it in any way. I figure we're always dealing with the elements in some way, right? So everything — every tiny factor that we can account for should be. I don't want like, say, a ladybug wandering in and suddenly my hair is bright red with black spots all over it."

  Hailey laughed. "That'd catch some eyes." Jessica's face was turning bright red again. She was working up to say something. Hailey cocked her head to the side, not sure what the hold up was. "Jess, what's up?"

  "I just—" Jessica started. "I want to be sure nothing interferes, so…" She tugged at her jacket sleeve pointedly.

  Understanding dawned on Hailey. "Oh!" She grinned. "Sorry, I'm really slow at times, remember? I'll just pop out for a bit and leave you to it." She waggled her eyebrows suggestively. "Gotta save that sexy body for the right person, hmm?"

  She turned to leave, but Jessica called out first. "Hailey?"

  "Yeah?"

  "Stay, please?"

  Hailey turned around. Jessica had always been extremely shy since the first day they'd met. She typically wore baggy clothes that hid her figure and desperately avoided situations where she'd wear anything less. They'd never even been to the beach once (though Hailey supposed it didn't help that the nearest beach was a good long train ride away and none of them much felt like leaving town). Even when they slept, Jessica was in full pajamas and under the covers before Hailey even showed up to bed. She'd made it quite clear nonverbally that she liked her privacy, and Hailey had done her best to accommodate. To say she was surprised by Jessica's request was putting it lightly.

  "You sure, Jess?"

  "I—" Jessica started. She tugged at the sleeve of her forest-green jacket again, looking nervous. "I'm sorry."

  "What do you have to be sorry for?" Hailey said. She almost laughed, but managed to keep it in. It would have been hurtful, and Jessica really was her best friend.

  "I want you to see me," Jessica said suddenly.

  "...Huh?"

  "I... I like you."

  "I—" Hailey started, then the freight train crashed home, reverberating through her skull. "Oh!"

  Jessica pulled her hood up over her head and pulled the drawstrings closed. "I'm sorry."

  Hailey didn't hesitate. She bounded over the line of chalk and buried Jessica in a bear hug, lifting the smaller girl off her feet. "Don't be sorry, silly."

  "But you don't—"

  Hailey put a hand on the back of her head and pressed her face into Hailey's shoulder. "Shh."

  "I didn't want to tell you. I liked what we had."

  "Jess… It's okay." Hailey let her out of the hug, but still held her at arm's length. They sat down inside the circle Jessica had drawn.

  "I understand if you want me to leave—" Jessica started in a cracked voice, but Hailey put a finger to her lips.

  "Don't be ridiculous. You're my best friend and I love you."

  "But I… You—" Jessica stumbled over her words. Hailey waited patiently, letting her get her thoughts out. "You're not… into girls, right?"

  Hailey shook her head. "I'm not."

  Jessica's eyes welled up. Hailey grabbed her again and held her close. She knew this part would be painful, but it had to be done. She was still reeling mentally. Jessica, her best friend in the world, was gay, and she hadn't realized it after living with her for months and months?

  And to think I afraid she was going to steal Wes way back! Hailey remembered, and stifled another laugh before Jessica got the wrong idea.

  "I just don't want—" Jessica said, her mouth muffled by Hailey's shoulder. "I don't want it to get weird between us."

  This was too much for Hailey. She finally laughed. Jessica stiffened in her grip, but didn't try to pull away.

  "Jess, we've been practically living together indoors because we're hiding from the boogeymen. We can do magic, crazy impossible magic, and we're getting better at it every day. We're sitting in the middle of a bunch of moonstones and a hypodermoid—"

  "Hypocycloid."

  "Yeah, that one. And you think you being gay is gonna make this weird?" Hailey tugged gently at the back of Jessica's head, prompting her to look up and directly at Hailey. Her eyes were red and puffy, but Hailey stared her down directly and spoke emphatically: "Jessica, I will always be your best friend forever and ever, no matter what. And there's no way in hell I'm going to sleep tonight without you next to me. Got it?"

  "Got it," she said weakly, forcing a smile onto her lips.

  Hailey grinned. "And if you need space any time, or if you need the bed because you've got a hot date and need to make sweet sapphic love to her, you just say the word and I'm out of there."

  Jessica laughed somewhere inside Hailey's top, and it brought a burst of warmth and sunshine to Hailey's heart. She finally loosened her grip, but Jessica was still holding on tight, so Hailey just held her for a while longer, until her impatience finally gave way.

  "As much as I love hugging you, Jess, didn't we have a cool new experiment to try here?"

  "Oh, right," Jessica said. She let go and Hailey backed off, seating herself against the wall cross-legged.

  "Still want me to stick around?"

  "Yeah," Jessica said, with quite a bit more confidence than before. She began shrugging off her clothes one by one. A huge emotional weight had vanished from the room, leaving Hailey feeling elated. Jessica's face was screwed up in determination.

  "You good?" she asked, as Jessica paused, stripped down to her underwear.

  "Never been… you know."

  "Naked around someone before?" Hailey offered. Jessica nodded. "Well, call me practice then."

  "Right." Jessica reached behind her back to unhook her bra, and let it fall away with a wince. Hailey kept her gaze fixed on Jessica's face, making sure she didn't feel ogled, but Jessica noticed anyway. "You can look."

  "You look great," Hailey said encouragingly.

  "You don't have to say that," Jessica squealed, immediately covering herself up with her hands.

  "No, seriously. You do. I'd kill for your skin."

  "Really?"

  "Really really," Hailey answered sincerely. "And you've got more than enough going on in the boob department too, if you're wondering. Just the right amount, trust me. You're sexy."

  Jessica giggled nervously, letting her hands fall away. She sat down cross-legged, finally removing her underwear as well. She pressed her hands to her head, closing her eyes and beginning to concentrate. Hailey leaned back against the wall, watching impatiently. She was eager to see Jessica pull it off, even if she didn't expect it to actually look much different than before. They'd colored some hair already with a bit of the moonstones, but as she'd noted, it just changed back the moment they let go of the spell. A permanent change — one they didn't have to pay attention to after they'd cast it — would be yet another evolutionary step forward.

  Jessica started murmuring. The moonstones glowed slightly, pale white. Hailey spotted a bead of sweat forming on Jessica's chest, then two. She was clutching her small fists tight. Her knuckles whitened. The chalk outline seemed to quiver a little as she started speaking faster.

  The moonstones glowed a little stronger. The chalk quivered a little more. The sweat on Jessica's chest glistened brighter.

  Hailey could sense the energy moving in the room. It was a sensation not unlike the pricklies from an electric current, but it was somehow more pervasive and penetrating. She felt inside her chest and through her limbs, not just at a surface level but deep inside her bones.

  It shifted, agitated, and Hailey could feel it rushing toward Jessica. Against her better judgment, she sprang to her feet, taking a step toward her friend.

  Immediately, the moonstones pulsed a kaleidoscope of angry colors. Hailey felt a shift in the energy, sudden hostile and defensive. She froze, terrified that something had gone wrong, but Jessica seemed not to have noticed. She was perfectly still except for her mouth, continuously muttering something incomprehensible.

  Hailey had to suppress a gasp as Jessica's hair was suddenly, inexplicably brown. The purple had utterly vanished, replaced with her pleasant natural brown. The changes didn't stop there, however, as highlights of azure popped into place, fading in over the brown as it reached the waves currently brushing over her knees. Only a few bunches were colored, but the effect was striking. It was such a full color, something Hailey suspected would never have come out so clearly with bleach and dye.

  The moonstones stopped glowing, having become blackened and coarse, and the chalk seemed to have evaporated entirely. Jessica opened an eye cautiously and ran a hand through her hair.

  "I think it worked," she said, breathless.

  Hailey took her cue, jumping to her feet and bounding into the (now vanished) circle to pounce on her best friend.

  "Jess, you're a genius!"

  "Hold on, Hailey! Get off!" Jessica squealed in alarm. Hailey propped herself up in panic.

  "What? Did I screw something up?"

  "...No. You were just choking me a bit," Jessica said meekly. Hailey laughed and rolled off her, running a hand through the newly colored hair experimentally.

  "This looks beautiful, Jess."

  Her face blushed bright red yet again. "Thanks." They both stretched out on the warm floor, relaxing in the sunlight streaming in from the window.

  "So what's next on the list?" Hailey asked, knowing Jessica's mind was already jumping through dozens of hoops to the next possibility.

  "This is just a cosmetic," Jessica said, picking up a bundle of hair and letting it fall.

  "Sexy one though," Hailey pointed out.

  Jessica giggled. "You could do more than that probably. Make yourself ridiculously sexy, if you want to go that way."

  "Not like we know how to make your boobs bigger, Jess."

  "You're assuming that's what I find sexy," Jessica said petulantly. "Anyway, what I meant was, there's so much more you can do than cosmetic stuff. I already made myself able to see far, and better at night too, but only for a little bit."

  "But didn't it make it hard to see color?"

  "Because I only did the rods, and it wasn't very precise. I think my brain got confused by it. If I can get it down, I could make my cones able to pick up way more light than they should and in more variety, which would mean color vision even in dark night. It's more complicated than that, but you get the idea."

  "Sure, yeah. Hey, couldn't you, like, see more colors too?"

  Jessica squealed in delight. "Oh, yeah! You could see colors no one ever could before. Like ultraviolet. Lots of animals can see UV, I could figure that out too." Jessica was practically rolling around with excitement next to her. Hailey grinned, elated that her friend was so happy. She saw bright fluffy clouds rolling by in the window, taking them as a sign that everything was going to be all right.

  "Other things too, though, besides sight, yeah?" she prompted.

  "Yeah, for sure," Jessica continued. "You could enhance other senses, obviously, but also just work on the normal processes of your body. Like sleep, or the need to eat. What if you could just reduce your need to sleep by a big portion every day? That's so much more time in the day that you can do whatever you like. Think about all the stuff you could do."

  "I feel like I do too much some days already."

  "Oh shh. You love it. But still, you could do the same amount in a day and feel less packed, right? It still works out."

  Hailey nodded. "Yeah, makes sense. Sign me up."

  Jessica giggled. "I'm not that good, Hales. Give me some more time to recover."

  "Oh, the number of times I've heard that line."

  "Trouble with boys?" Jessica asked mockingly.

  "They just can't keep up sometimes."

  "Keep up?"

  Hailey laughed aloud, giving Jessica a nudge. "Jess, when did you become the cool one?"

  "Did you see my hair? Cool colors. It's like a magic charm."

  Jessica sighed and curled up against Hailey, in the same way she always did in her sleep. Hailey felt it was different now, but not in the way she feared. Jessica didn't feel like she'd been shut out or that an impenetrable wall had been thrown up by Jessica's confession and subsequent rejection. Instead, Jessica had bared herself (in more ways than one, Hailey thought, suppressing a laugh) and been accepted for exactly who she was. Hailey wrapped an arm around her shoulders and pulled her close, and Jessica found her usual spot pressed up against Hailey's side with ease. Nothing but warmth and love, exactly what Hailey had hoped for. She stared out the window while Jessica's breath warmed her neck, and watched her clouds sweeping through the sky, the same azure as the hair currently scattered across her chest. Hailey smiled, the true smile of contentment and joy that so few ever find in their life. For the moment they could both forget everything, and just be happy they'd found each other.

  A quick double-knock sent them both scrambling to their feet. Hailey bounded to the door of the spare bedroom, where Weston had been just about to open the door. She squeezed through as tight a gap as she could manage, ignoring the befuddled look on his face, and quickly shut it behind her. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Jessica desperately gathering up her clothes. Hailey guessed it would be at least a couple minutes for her to calm down and get dressed. She could stall him that much.

  "...What were you two doing?" Weston asked suspiciously.

  "Just practicing," Hailey said. She didn't say the real answer, because she didn't want Weston leaping at Jessica's throat next for trying something without clearing it with the whole group first. Not that the group really acted like a group anymore. It was a rule they'd established so long ago, and one they'd barely followed at first anyway. Not until that terrible night in June had Weston ever insisted on making sure no one tried anything dangerous without everyone present.

  "Practicing what?"

  "Practicing magic, what else?" Hailey said crossly. "Where have you been all day?" she added, nodding pointedly toward the wall clock. It was already getting toward late afternoon. He wasn't planning to stick around long if he wanted to be home before the sunset.

  Weston frowned. It seemed like the only expression he was capable of lately. "I was out researching."

  "Researching?"

  "Where this all might have come from," he continued, looking over her shoulder curiously. "What's going on?"

  "Jessica was concentrating on something and didn't want to lose the thread," Hailey said, using the phrase Jessica had come up with to describe how she found things through her magic. She said it was like following a immense tangled knot of threads until you managed to pull out one single strand, but Hailey didn't really understand what she meant. She doubt she ever could without having the same affinity for that branch of magic like Jessica did. "Want something to eat?"

  Weston looked suspicious, but Jessica divining something was a pretty normal excuse they'd used in the past plenty of times. He accepted it without question and followed her downstairs to the kitchen. They were a few bites into a plate of cookies Hailey had baked that morning when Jessica finally emerged, looking slightly ruffled but fully clothed. Hailey couldn't resist herself and shot Jess a wink. She giggled.

  "Hey, Jessica," Weston spoke up, turning around. "Thought you went purple. Changed your mind?"

  "Yeah. I decided blue was my color," Jessica said, plopping herself in the chair next to Hailey's and helping herself to the cookies.

  "Find out anything?" Hailey asked Weston, trying to deflect the conversation back.

  He shook his head. "There's nothing. Nothing at all." He bit forcefully into a cookie, drawing a look from them both. "I can't find a single reference to anything like what we've found, or the two things that destroyed the library, or anything at all. I can't even reach Ian or Hugo. It's just us three, all alone. All we have to go on is whatever Jessica can pluck out of thin air!"

  Frustration seeped from his voice like venom. Hailey wanted to try and comfort him, but at the same time she didn't feel like getting anywhere near him ever again. He was toxic, and she had been free of him for so long. She didn't want to go down that path.

  "Wes, we'll figure it out. We'll be okay," Jessica said encouragingly.

  "I don't know that we will," Weston said miserably. "We're on a clock and it's running out."

  "So what do you suggest?" Hailey snapped. They both looked at her in shock. She'd had enough. "I'm done with the moping and the groaning. Do you actually have an idea? Or any specific danger?"

  "You know the danger—" Weston started, but Hailey cut him off.

  "Yeah, we all saw it. And it scared me to hell. But we haven't seen or heard them in months, not since the second time. I've been out in the dark plenty of times and nothing's ever happened. I know you and Jess and Ian never felt safe, and I get that. But I think it's time to face up to the fact that we're hiding from possibilities. If we keep doing that, we'll never really live again."

  "Do you want to die?" Weston shouted, jumping to his feet. Jessica pulled her hood back on, her eyes wide.

  In that moment — seeing Jessica retreating again — Hailey felt real hatred for the first time in her life. It was an inferno bursting into life in her chest. She hated Weston for controlling them for so long, keeping them afraid and inside. He thought he was doing it for their own good. She didn't deny his intentions.

  But he was wrong.

  "No one's going to die, Wes!" Hailey shouted back, standing as well. Jessica ran out of the room, and Hailey felt a tear welling up in her eye. "Those two have been gone for months! We don't have to be afraid of the night anymore!"

  "You don't know that. You can't know that."

  "I'm willing to try," Hailey snapped.

  "God, Hailey, you are just as bad as when we were dating."

  She laughed bitterly. "What the hell, you want to go there? This is why we broke up, Wes. You're so afraid you can't let anything happen unless you're absolutely sure you know where it's going to go."

  "Better than making stupid mistakes and losing everything for it," said Weston in a grim tone.

  "Have you ever lost everything?" Hailey asked. "Hell, Wes, have you ever lost anything? Does the concept of loss even enter that tiny coward brain of yours?"

  "Does it enter yours?"

  "God yes! Every time I walk out the door, I'm afraid of losing people. But look at what staying inside and hiding has gotten us!" Hailey held up two fingers. "Hugo left when we weren't willing to go out and talk to him. He stuck around for Ian's sake, but we were all too busy hiding inside and playing around with magic to notice he was on the outside, and then he was gone." She dropped her finger. "Ian left because we were too scared to deal with the shit we had going on outside. We didn't even talk about it. We just shut down every possibility of handling it. We just stayed inside and hid, like we always do, and sure enough, off goes Ian." She dropped the other finger, glaring at Weston with all the fury she could muster.

  "You can't possibly blame me—"

  "I sure as hell blame you, Wes. But I blame myself too. I could have spoken up, I could have done more. I let them both go and I hate myself a bit more every time I look out the window and think about how far away they've both run." Hailey felt tears streaming down her face now. "It's all our fault, Wes."

  "No," Weston said, but his conviction felt weak and his arguments worthless. Hailey nodded slowly.

  "They're gone because of us."

  Weston shook his head. "You're wrong."

  "Then go, Wes. I'll be outside in the world, where we belong."

  Weston turned and headed up the stairs. Hailey sat down and watched him go, feeling bitterly triumphant. She'd said the words she'd been screaming in her head every night before she went to sleep, speeches she'd composed and practiced silently every single night with Jessica desperately clinging to her for safety and support. Her life had reached a turning point. It simply had to improve from here. She would accept nothing else.

  She could hear her bedroom door creak open, and sighed. Weston was going to try to talk to Jessica, get her to persuade Hailey off her soapbox. It was pointless. Jessica was on her side for sure. She wanted to be out, be alive. Not trapped in this tiny box with someone who could never properly be with her. Not in the way she wanted.

  Hailey stood laboriously, feeling suddenly exhausted. She made her way to the staircase, meaning to go intercept Weston and send him out for real. Jessica didn't need that sort of harassment. They'd both be better off without Weston in their lives.

  She'd be raw and distracted for a while, but magic always brought her back. She'd taken to it more readily than the rest of them after all. Jessica had a sheer raw talent none of them could match, even if she was never quite as creative as they were. She always managed to cast anything they did, even without the advantage of affinity — simply through raw, focused effort and practice. In fact, Jessica was probably practicing right then to drown out their argument, working on her latest idea—

  Oh.

  Oh.

  Hailey took the steps three at a time. She nearly tripped on the stairs in her haste. Weston had pushed open the other bedroom door — the empty one where no one slept — and walked inside, leaving the door ajar.

  Hailey saw the edges of a wide, thick hypocycloid drawn in white chalk.

  No…

 

 

 

VI.

Late December, three months later, on a dark winter night thick with snow, at Hailey's apartment.

  "I'm home, Jess!" Hailey called, kicking snow off her boot on the front step before she walked in. Her hands were laden down with groceries from Hector's place and her face pink from the cold outside. The hallway was no better, and she felt her teeth starting to chatter. Hailey closed her eyes briefly and extended her mind out into the edges of her skin. She found the points she was looking for and set them vibrating slightly, like she were mentally twanging a taut cord.

  In moments Hailey began to warm up again. The spell had worn off since she left Hector's. Feeling the warmth trickle through her skin, she felt like she was properly home. Hailey pulled the door shut with her foot before heading downstairs to starting unloading the groceries.

  "Hope you like ham, because that's all I could think of for Christmas dinner," Hailey sighed. "Hector gave me an employee discount but it's still not much." She bustled around the kitchen, checking on the brownies she'd pulled out of the oven just before she'd run to the store. They looked perfect, just the right balance. She pulled a few of onto a plate and set it aside before turning to the tree in the corner.

  It was an artificial tree, which to Hailey's sensibilities as a native Pacific Northwester was an affront to nature. Her landlord had expressly forbidden bringing trees in for one reason or another, which left her limited options. She didn't like the plasticky, obviously fake pine branches, but she couldn't not have a Christmas tree. It was a compromise.

  Hailey kept a vague running commentary aloud of everything she did while she went about cleaning up the kitchen. The apartment was always so quiet of late, and Hailey was never much for the quiet. She craved activity and interaction. Anything to remind her that her ears were still functioning properly, and that someone still lived in that place.

  The air was her constant companion. She'd grown accustomed to feeling it as an extension of herself and felt comforted by its presence. Hailey was prone to shifting it around solely out of habit. While she worked in the kitchen, she sent a slight breeze coasting across her face, despite the chill. It helped the room feel less stuffy and more alive.

  The air was a great help to her as well in cleaning. She sent it thundering underneath chairs and over the tops of cabinets, blowing around dust with ease and collecting it neatly into the trash can. She felt like a composer directing a whispering orchestra as the gust tossed the room around. Any loose papers or light objects had long since been weighted down, as this was a regular occurrence.

  Done cleaning and done shopping, Hailey headed back up the stairs to their bedroom. She knocked on the door twice gently before calling out, "Just me, Jess."

  A bright crescent moon streamed in through the window curtains, casting long shadows across the floor from the couple of stuffed animals that sat perched on the sill. The room was cold and dark, and Hailey immediately set to warming it up as best she could. It was a wide space, but it was enclosed and had plenty of objects to trap heat, so it wasn't as difficult as some spaces. She wished they could afford to pay their heating bill, but it just didn't fit the budget she'd laid out. They saved wherever they could by relying on magic. Hailey crossed the room and collapsed in her desk chair.

  "Long, long day. I'm taking too many classes. I think I'll drop one next term," Hailey mused, picking up her notebook and leafing through pages at random. "It's just too hectic between that and work. Plus I never get to spend enough time here." She looked up over the top of the notebook. "Would you like that?"

  A faint breeze brushed Hailey's face, sending a few strands of hair fluttering.

  Hailey shivered. "Jess, you gotta stop doing that. I'm cold enough as is."

  "Mm," she answered, slightly muffled.

  Hailey set the notebook aside and turned to face her. "I wonder if you'd want to go back to school. If you could, I mean," she added. She felt embarrassed asking such a question, when she knew that Jessica couldn't answer.

  She didn't understand a word Hailey was saying.

  Jessica was sitting cross-legged on Hailey's bed, wrapped in a blanket and looking around the room inquisitively. Presently she was sending little licks of firelight dancing around the room like tiny floating candles, spinning out an intricate pattern. Hailey was impressed Jessica maintained the dance even while tickling her with the current of air, two very different spells.

  "You know, that's supposed to be my affinity. How do you do all that at once so easy?" Hailey asked. Jessica cocked her head to the side, not understanding, and Hailey did her best to hide her exasperation. It wasn't Jess' fault. She was doing the best she could.

  Hailey brought her hands to her mouth, miming a knife and fork. Jessica nodded, 'hmm'ing excitedly. She leapt off the bed and headed back downstairs, Hailey following less enthusiastically.

  Thankfully it was leftovers night, or Hailey might have simply given up on dinner entirely. She felt far too exhausted to cook. Instead, they enjoyed microwaved chicken from the day before, which Jessica dug into with gusto. Hailey picked at her food gently and watched her friend chowing down. Had she always eaten like that?

  Yes, Hailey reminded herself. It was the same Jessica, through and through. Her personality wasn't really different. Just adjusted, viewed through a different lens. More importantly, Hailey was quite literally the only person Jessica ever interacted with anymore. Enthusiasm at the little things wasn't that weird.

  "You know, Jess, Christmas is coming up," Hailey said, still picking at her chicken with her fork. "I need to get you something."

  Jessica looked up. For a moment Hailey thought she might have understood, but she looked away again a moment later. 'Jess' was the only word she'd caught, which she recognized as her own name. Everything else was just noise.

  "I wonder if your parents got you anything," Hailey continued. "Doubt it. How do you put up with them anyway?"

  Hailey had gone to meet with them after it became clear Jessica's condition wasn't improving. Before she'd even begun to explain what was wrong with their daughter, they'd said they didn't care what she got up to and that her life decisions were her own business.

  Hailey had been quickly shuffled to the door and told not to return.

  "Probably best I didn't say anything," Hailey mused. "It's a good thing you were already dropping out of your classes or I'd have the university all over me too." Jessica frowned, looking at Hailey's plate of chicken which she'd largely ignored. "You want more?" Hailey asked. She pointed at the plate, then at Jessica.

  Jessica shook her head, gesturing to Hailey and miming eating.

  "I'm not feeling very hungry," Hailey said, shaking her head. Jessica frowned again. She mimed sleeping, then waking up and pointing at her stomach with a pained face in quick succession. Hailey sighed. "You're probably right." She began to eat again, and Jessica nodded with satisfaction. "It's a good thing you stopped being shy around me," Hailey added with her mouth full. "Shy people suck at charades."

  When they finished dinner, Jessica cleaned and put away the plates while Hailey went to relax on the sofa, still burned out from the day. Jessica joined her a minute later, bringing along her laptop (which Hailey had seen no need to return to her family). Hailey wrapped an arm around her and pulled her close, then took hold of the blanket across the room with her mind and floated it over to wrap them up snug.

  Jessica's laptop had been a bit of a challenge. Hailey had found it locked up tight and Jessica staring at the letters on the keys with a defeated expression. Hailey had taken it to a friend, Mason, and — after a great deal of persuasion — gotten him to unlock it without asking too many questions. Since then, it had become Jessica's portal to random knowledge. She had stumbled her way to the few sites she used by sheer persistence, either via random clicks or following images and icons to what she needed. Hailey wasn't sure what she did all day, but Jessica seemed content, so Hailey didn't question it.

  When they curled up on the couch, that usually meant watching a show. Lately, that had been a good deal of anime. It really wasn't Hailey's thing, and she was out like a light within minutes every time. It just wasn't for her. Still, given the artwork and the high energy of whatever Jessica was watching, Hailey could see the appeal for someone who couldn't possibly follow a plot verbally.

  Sure enough, Jessica pulled one up, and it was only once she was gently shaking Hailey awake again that she even realized she'd fallen asleep.

  "Sorry, Jess," Hailey mumbled. "Is it time for bed?" She mimed laying down on her hands, their usual gesture for going to sleep. Jessica shook her head. Hailey realized that the laptop screen was still on and paused on something.

  It was some series about magic, if Hailey remembered right. It was nonsense, of course, now that they knew what the real thing was — but still Jessica had latched onto it. Maybe it was the characters or the frantic pace, Hailey didn't know. What she did see was that the picture was frozen on a character holding up a bird feather. Once she saw Hailey was paying attention, Jessica tapped the keyboard.

  The character dropped the feather into a pot, puff of smoke and everything. Jessica pointed at the feather emphatically. Hailey wasn't sure what she was supposed to understand from the scene. Were they going to make a potion or something?

  "Jess, I don't get it."

  Jessica paused it again, and mimed scribbling something on paper.

  "It's over on the desk," Hailey answered, pointing. Jessica frowned, pressing up against Hailey under the blanket and shivering deliberately. She laughed. "Fair enough."

  With some effort, Hailey found the paper and pencils on the desk and took hold of them. Moving things with her mind had become a bit easier over time, but she still never managed to be very precise with it. Hailey doubted she'd ever really get a hold of it, with how little progress she seemed to manage. Case in point, she managed to accidentally wrap the paper around Jessica's head instead of landing gently in her outstretched hand like she'd intended.

  Jessica slapped Hailey on the arm gently with a stern look on her face, then took the paper and laid it against the lid of her closed laptop. She began scribbling out a feather, then what Hailey took to be a gemstone.

  "Gems and feathers?" Hailey murmured, not following.

  Jessica circled them, then drew an arrow and drew out a person in a superhero pose, cape and all, with action lines.

  "Gems and feathers equal flying?"

  Jessica then drew out a circle between them, then surrounded it with the shape Hailey had dreaded. Another hypocycloid — eight sided this time — with gemstones at the cardinal points and little feathers at the diagonals.

  "You think I can fly if I did a ritual using these?" Hailey wondered aloud. "You can use feathers for energy?" She was cautiously excited. She'd never given up on her goal, despite everything that had happened. Hailey Winscombe still longed more than anything to fly through the air on her own power.

  She just couldn't do it. Not that way.

  Hailey pointed at the ritual shape and shook her head. Jessica frowned, then pointed at it again and nodded.

  Hailey sighed. "No. I can't. Not after this."

  Jessica shook her head. She pointed at the ritual shape, then at herself and raised her eyebrow.

  Hailey nodded. "Because of how much it's hurt you."

  Her head shook again more frantically, brown and blue hair almost smacking Hailey in the face. Jessica pointed at herself, then gave a thumbs up and smiled. Hailey's eyes threatened to well up, but she forced it away. She refused to cry in front of her best friend.

  "Jess, you're way braver than me," Hailey murmured, hugging her. "I just do stupid things for fun. You actually go after the things you want in life. Hell, you managed to move in with the girl you loved on your own terms. Well played." Jessica hugged her back, and Hailey continued mumbling into her messy brown hair. "You're the smart one too. You figured out all the branches and the affinities and such. I just goofed off and did little air tricks."

  Hailey felt a teardrop roll down her cheek against her will and land in Jessica's hair. Jess stiffened as she felt it, but Hailey just held her close and refused to let her look up and see the tears rolling down her face. "I'm going to figure this out. I'll help you get better, and then we can go flying together. We can fly up in the sky and you can sing your heart out where no one's around to make fun of you for it. That's the best offer I've got, unless you can invent time travel." Hailey laughed bitterly. "Hey, maybe that's the eighth branch we never figured out. Good old time travel. Wouldn't that be nice?"

  Hailey buried her face in the blanket, wrapping it up tight around them both. "I need you to come back, Jessica," she mumbled. "We're the only ones left. Please. Come back and sing again."

  Jessica nudged her gently, and Hailey sighed. She loosened her grip just enough for Jessica to move around, and her friend started murmuring something that Hailey couldn't understand. A moment later, she felt warmth spreading all across her skin. It was so comfortable and soothing that Hailey immediately burst into tears. Jessica held her tight as Hailey sobbed, crying herself bitterly to sleep while a flurry of snow began pounding against the windows.

 

 

 

VII.

Mid-May, about five months later, on a rainy afternoon, at Hailey's apartment.

  Hailey loved the clouds, but hated the rain.

  A breathtaking layered wall of clouds rolling through the endless expanse of blue was something to be cherished, but this solid blanket of grey? Where there was no light to be found, and sheets of water fell in droves to soak everything through? This was just depressing.

  It didn't help that she was staring out the window of her small kitchen with the smell of burned chocolate fudge filling the room. Hailey had been stirring a batch as a treat for Jessica's birthday, which was coming up soon, but she'd gotten distracted by a fleeting glimpse of a bird on the balcony. She'd rushed to the door, trying to catch it by flinging a pocket of air around it, but it had jumped away too fast. Hailey had only just managed to clip off a few feathers as it took to the skies.

  They'd attempted the ritual several times since December, with no success. Jessica's current theory was that the feathers they were using were no good, and that it had to be from a wild bird, or perhaps the right type of bird. She'd drawn out several different species for Hailey to pursue, and the red-tailed hawk on the balcony had definitely been on the list. Hailey was shocked it had perched so close — from what she'd researched online, she hadn't expected one to come to her. She only hoped the feathers she'd managed to gather were enough.

  More importantly, she hoped that she wouldn't let Jess down again.

  Hailey still wasn't sure if the ritual was failing because of the feathers. No, Hailey believed it was her own fault. Every time they started, Hailey took one look at Jessica, whose voice she was actually beginning to forget, and her heart seized up. She lost all confidence, all drive. Without it, the ritual may as well have been a wish on a star for all the good it did.

  Hailey clenched her fist tight in frustration. A wind picked up in the kitchen, the edges of papers flapping noisily. She flicked open the window latch and slid it aside with her mind, and the air quickly carried out the scent of burned fudge before it could spread through the house and Jessica noticed it. Hailey would do it again, and do it right this time.

  Just not right now, Hailey sighed as she heard a thump from upstairs. Jessica was rushing down to meet her. Must have smelled it anyway. But to her surprise, Jessica wasn't looking for the source of the smell. No, she was holding a fistful of feathers from the red-tail that Hailey had scared away only moments earlier.

  "You caught it, Jess?" Hailey asked, pointing at her. Jessica nodded, miming catching something out of midair with her hands, then pointing to her head with a flutter of her fingers. "With magic. Nice."

  Jessica drew a circle in midair, then cocked her head to the side with a "Hmm?"

  Hailey sighed. "I don't know. I really don't think it'll make a difference." She shrugged. Jessica shook her head and grabbed Hailey's arm, pulling her to the staircase. "All right, all right," Hailey conceded. "I'll give it another shot." She let Jessica lead her upstairs to the empty bedroom, where their ritual circle awaited.

  A near-permanent dusting of chalk in various colors formed a neat, perfect circle in the center of the wooden floorboards. Jessica had taken to decorating the room while Hailey was out with various gemstones set in silver candle holders, while actual candles formed a large ring outside the circle. A twinned set of astroids surrounded the circle, with empty holders at each point where Jessica could fill them as needed. Various pouches and boxes lined the edges of the room with all the different stones and materials Jessica had ordered online (through the concerted efforts of Hailey and the least entertaining game of pictionary imaginable).

  As the decorations grew more detailed and complex, Hailey wondered what an outsider might think of the place. It looked like something out of an occult daydream, between the wax candles, chalk symbols and glittering stones, but the vibe didn't feel creepy or off-putting to Hailey. It felt comforting, in fact, with the attention to detail and the mix of colors and shapes that Jessica had put into the room. Compared to the bare walls and cold empty floor it had once contained, Hailey now saw it as Jessica's place — something sacred and special. She hoped animal skulls weren't next on the decoration list though, or she might have to start miming to Jessica about what they could get away with.

  Hailey never entered if she could help it, but Jessica seemed to live in the room when she wasn't sleeping or eating. They occasionally spent time relaxing together after Hailey got home from work, but without fail she'd spring up with some untold inspiration that Hailey could only guess at and retreat back to her circle to meditate. Hailey had only used the room three times, for each of the previous attempts at the flight ritual Jessica had devised, but each had ended in stuttering failure.

  Hailey supposed she should be grateful nothing worse had happened.

  Jessica dug through one of the boxes at the edge of the room and came up with a mix of tourmaline and sapphire, which she started placing in the simple silver candle holders at the points of the star. Hailey took a handful of feathers and walked to the center, clutching them gently in one hand while her other went to the perfectly cut and polished tourmaline that hung from a chain around her neck. It was her favorite stone, and one that never seemed to darken when she drew wind out of it. Sometimes it felt like an old friend holding her hand in return. Hailey tried to feel something out of the feathers as well, sending her mind down through her fingers and into the rachis of the feather, hoping to sense anything. All she got back was a vague sense of the animal it belonged to, probably flapping away somewhere in the forest and hopefully far away from the two crazed girls in the apartment trying to catch it by summoning up air currents.

  So Hailey imagined. It didn't really give her any idea of the bird's thoughts, just its essence.

  Jessica was tugging at her shirt sleeve. Hailey had been lost in her thoughts again. She looked around at the circle, where all the gemstones and feathers had already been put in place. "Well, Jess, here we go again." Hailey began shrugging off her clothes while Jessica turned away, giving her some privacy. When she was ready, Hailey tapped her on the shoulder.

  Jessica took the pile of clothes and set them neatly in the corner of the room. Hailey stretched out her arms for a moment before sitting down cross-legged, as she'd seen Jessica do so many times, and closed her eyes. She pressed her hands to her face, warming herself from the chill in the room by setting her skin alight in the way she'd learned from Weston, so many months back. She put her hand to her chest and grasped the tourmaline stone hanging there for luck, while her other hand clenched the feathers tight.

  Hailey sent out her mind, letting it loose like a hook on the end of a line. It was still her, of course, but she no longer felt like she was inside her own body. Instead, her mind floated free in the room, bathing in the air currents that poured forth from the tourmaline and sapphire gems encircling her. Hailey had set them humming, and in response the feathers between each gem stood up straight. She sensed that there was something she was supposed to do to them, mentally draw from them somehow, but Hailey couldn't figure it out. She clenched her hands tight and threw her mind at them, but only met with a sheer wall of resistance. The feathers were impenetrable to her.

  Hailey knew they held the secret, but she just couldn't muster the strength to break through. She didn't have the ability, no matter how much she practiced. There was still only so much she could accomplish alone.

  Alone.

  Hailey's eyes flew open and she released the energy as quickly as she could. She pulled her mind back in and closed off her body to seal away the energy in the room before she interrupted the flow in a dangerous way. Would her idea work? Was it even possible?

  She didn't know, but something about it felt so right that she had to try.

  "Jess." Hailey said, drawing her attention. Jessica had been looking at the nearest feathers with a frustrated look, while determinedly avoiding gazing at Hailey directly. Jessica looked up, then immediately away while her face blushed red. Hailey leapt out of the circle impatiently and grabbed her hand.

  "Mm?" Jessica squeaked in surprise and confusion.

  "I think you can help, Jess!" Hailey said, excited. She pointed at the circle, then at herself and Jessica in turn. To try and emphasize the point, she waved a circle around the both of them, then pointed at Jessica's head, drawing a line from her temple to one of the feathers. "You can help me break into it."

  Jessica frowned. She looked at the feather, then back at Hailey. Her mouth formed a small "oh!" in surprise. She nodded frantically, and Hailey grinned.

  "I hope you know what you're doing, Jess, because I sure as hell don't."

  Jessica took off her clothes, forgetting all about modesty in her haste. Hailey took hold of each piece with her mind as Jess tossed it aside, and flung it into the corner where it landed atop her own, keeping them well clear of the circle. Once she'd stripped down, they both sat cross-legged in the circle. Jessica only just managed to fit inside, her knees pressed up against Hailey's own. Somehow that felt right, as if the physical connection might help them.

  "Ready?" Hailey asked, giving a slight nod. Jessica nodded, her eyes already screwed up in determination. Hailey closed her eyes and once more cast out her mind into the room. Immediately, she ran up against the wall formed by the feathers again, and the frustration almost sent her out of the trance, but a sudden presence held her from breaking.

  It was warmth and love incarnate, this new sensation that flew through the air to meet with Hailey's mental projection. For a brief moment, she could sense Jessica herself, down to her essence. Her passion for knowledge, her inquisitive drive, her bashful nature still pressing at her under the surface even now, and her deep love for Hailey. It was like a glimpse into her very soul, and in that moment Hailey could see a line that stretched out between the two of them, like a thick hazy thread that held taut between their minds. It was exciting and thrilling, and yet deeply personal and embarrassing. Hailey pulled away before she felt like she had felt too much and too intimately at Jessica's mind, where she could sense many more layers beyond the surface.

  Jessica hadn't seemed to notice Hailey brushing up against her, as her presence slammed against the feather with the force of a hurricane wind. Hailey saw what she was doing and joined her, pressing against the feather with the strength she could muster. It still wasn't enough.

  As if out of the corner of her eye, Hailey saw Jessica's arm reach out to pluck the stone from Hailey's chest. She could sense Jessica wanted her to grab it as well. It felt like Hailey was giving an order to her arm to rise, rather than actually moving herself. It took a great deal of effort, but Hailey managed to lift her hand and take hold of Jessica's with a firm grip.

  The wind immediately burst forth, whipping through the room and sending their hair fluttering wildly, Hailey's long straight blonde and Jessica's wavy brown and blue in unison. The tourmaline around the edges of the circle began to glow bright, and the feathers between each stone spun wildly around, lifting into the air with a power neither of them had consciously set forth.

  Hailey could feel something emerging from the feathers, a new sensation she didn't recognize. It began to flow toward the two of them in the center, filling them up with something she didn't yet understand. Jessica's mind made a strange movement, and suddenly the energy was all flowing directly to Hailey.

  It spread through her like a chill without cold, running up her spine and following her blood out to the very tips of her fingers and toes. Hailey had to resist the urge to flinch as it rolled through her. She couldn't mess this up, not now. Not when they were so close. Hailey felt like she was floating in midair and didn't want the sensation to ever stop.

  The feathers stopped spinning, all resistance gone, and Hailey saw her moment. She grasped at them with her mind and pulled their essence away, like grabbing something out of a deep pool of water. The feathers vanished into thin air with a hiss. The gemstones pulsed and lit up the room, then went deep black, completely spent. The wind coursing through the room faded and stilled, and the room was silent.

  Hailey let out a deep breath. She hadn't screwed it up at least. They'd made progress. Maybe next ti—

  "Ooh!" Jessica squealed, poking Hailey's leg excitedly. Hailey's eyes flew open.

  She hadn't felt like she was floating in midair; Hailey was currently hovering a good several feet above the floorboard, still cross-legged like she were seated on a invisible platform.

  Jessica took a few steps back, giving Hailey some space. Hailey felt panic rising in her chest, but that was nothing. She knew how to handle panic. She'd jumped out of airplanes and ridden down steep slopes at breakneck speeds. Panic was nothing.

  But this? This is something fantastic.

  Hailey laughed. She couldn't help it. She was up in the air, with nothing supporting her, and only the barest effort keeping her aloft. It wasn't like she was simply aloft at will; even now she could feel it beginning to drain her physically, but it was like she were out for a jog. She could keep it going if she needed to. Hailey was simply manipulating the air in a constant loop, like Jessica had said. Her position was never quite steady, as she had to constantly adjust the air and her own body weight to compensate for gravity, the earth spinning around madly beneath her, and any number of other factors, but it was somehow a barely conscious process. As if the magic were helping her figure it all out.

  Hailey tried to move herself, and found it a curious challenge. She could gain momentum in a direct line, but it wasn't easy. Going straight up was much harder than going forward, then up at an incline - like she were swooping. She tried a brief dive from the edge of the room, and almost clipped the floor before rising up on invisible wings and thudding hard against the far wall, laughing hysterically.

  Jessica ran over to check on her, making sure she was all right, and Hailey took her hand. She tried to lift Jessica into the air, but the weight was too much. Hailey ended up falling atop her instead as the magic broke. She was quite suddenly earthbound and back to normal.

  "Mmm!" Jessica sounded heartbroken, like she thought she had ended it. Hailey shook her head and called back to the magic, picturing it mentally as a pair of majestic wings in the exact brown and blue highlights of Jessica's hair. The image sprung into her mind fully-formed as though it wasn't quite her own design, but Hailey didn't question it. It just felt right.

  With a mental flap of her newfound wings, Hailey was suddenly aloft again, quivering in midair while the downdraft sent Jessica's hair fluttering. Jessica giggled and jumped with her arms up, catching Hailey in a brief hug while Hailey floated gently a foot or two above her, sending them spinning around briefly in midair before the weight brought Jessica's feet back to the floor once more.

  A moment later, Jessica's face turned bright red. She turned around, grabbing desperately for her clothes. Hailey cackled aloud — having long since gotten over feeling shy around her best friend — and decided to try swooping through the room again. It ended in quite the same way as before, with her thudding against the far wall, but with noticeably less painful an impact.

  Jessica, having tossed on a loose shirt and pants, held up Hailey's clothes and made a noise. Hailey looked over, and Jessica pointed at them, then mimed flapping wings, then at the clothes again.

  "Mm, yeah. I should probably try that," Hailey laughed, still feeling euphoric from finally accomplishing her dreams. She sent herself flying over to Jessica, but overshot and almost crashed into the wall again. Jessica was looking down at the floor pointedly and missed the entire thing. With a clumsy turnaround, she managed to snatch her clothes from Jessica and put them partially on.

  To her relief, the weight of the clothes didn't seem to be enough to pull her down much more than her own weight. It was a noticeable addition, but not so much that she started losing altitude. Hailey felt fatigue beginning to creep into her muscles, particularly her arms, but stubbornly kept swooping around the room as long as she could, while Jessica watched her with delight, making contented chirping noises.

  After she felt like exhaustion was really starting to set in, Hailey finally brought herself to a stop, flaring out her mental wings in a move she'd just figured out. She released them, letting the wings in her mind vanish in a puff and immediately dropping to the floor below. Hailey could almost feel them disappear from her real shoulders, but it could have just been her imagination. Jessica ran to her side and hugged her.

  "Yeah, yeah, that was awesome," Hailey laughed, wrapping her best friend up tight. Jessica nodded and smiled. "Someday I'll figure out how to take you with me."

  Jessica cocked her head to the side, indicating she didn't understand, and Hailey felt her heart sink a little. Here she was, celebrating, and Jessica still couldn't speak a word. What were they wasting time on? Silly flying tricks around a room?

  The joy she'd felt only moments before began draining out of her like a deflating balloon.

  She looked at Jessica, and pointed at her mouth, then her head. Jessica looked confused.

  "I've been trying, Jessica," Hailey said, the delight completely gone from her voice. She felt like her emotions were on a pendulum. She'd pulled it so far to one side, feeling such unbridled joy, that she was now paying the price. Tears sprung to her eyes as she recalled that Jessica hadn't spoken or understood a word in nearly eight months.

  Jessica shook her head frantically, and hugged Hailey tight. She pointed at her mouth, then at her head, then held out her hand and made a 'so-so' gesture.

  "No, it's not all right," Hailey said, tasting salt on her lips. "You deserve so much better than being locked up in here day and night. And I just don't know what to do for you." Hailey remembered the fudge she'd been cooking for Jessica's birthday and felt even worse. "It's almost your birthday and I'm sitting around making snacks and wondering what you'll want to watch tonight. I should be out researching or doing something."

  Hailey laughed bitterly. "I can't even do that though. I accused Wes of breaking us apart, and then I went ahead and did the same damn thing. I drove him away. I'm the only one left, and I'm the worst one at magic out of all of us. I can't fix you, Jess."

  Hailey sat down against the wall and buried her face in her hands. Jessica sat beside her, putting an arm around her and pulled her close.

  "I'm so selfish and worthless. Here I am enjoying myself and letting you help me with learning how to fly when you can't even talk to your friends anymore." Hailey dabbed at her eyes with her sleeve. "I feel like I'm the one that needs you to sleep now. I can't sleep a wink without you next to me. How can you even stand sleeping by someone every night you have a massive crush on that won't ever return it? I feel like I'm taking advantage of you."

  "Was it a mistake?" Hailey rambled on. "We could have stopped whenever we wanted. Maybe Hugo was right." She shook her head. "You'd say that was stupid though. You'd tell me that sort of hindsight wouldn't get me anywhere. Then you'd tell me to think about all the good things it's brought and to focus on what to do next."

  "I don't know what to do next, Jess," Hailey croaked, looking up at her. Jessica's eyes were full of sympathy and concern, but Hailey had no idea how much she actually understood, or even how much she wanted Jess to understand. Hailey had given up.

  "I don't know how to do this alone." With her greatest fear spoken aloud, Hailey felt despair overcome her. Her throat choked up and her voice cracked. She buried her face in her hands once more. Hailey couldn't bear to see Jessica's face in that moment, comforting and forgiving and warm. Hailey had failed her. Hailey didn't deserve her love.

  Hailey Winscombe was meant to be alone.

 

 

 

VIII.

Mid-May, a week later, on a cloudy afternoon in Rallsburg.

  Hailey stood once more at the top of the radio tower, the only structure visible outside of the gentle bowl of trees that formed the town proper. Hailey had climbed the tower several times, both before and after their discovery of magic, and each time she marveled at the view from the top. To the north the forest rolled out in a blanket of green covering the bones of some massive giant, climbing into the mountain that sat alone blocking her view of the ocean that lay beyond. In every other direction were trees, endless trees, with only the train track snaking through clearings showing any sign of civilization for miles and miles.

  If Hailey strained her eyes, she could just barely make out the little building she called home. Jessica was probably sitting at the bedroom window at that very moment watching her. Hailey wished she could see as far, but she'd never learned that particular spell, and Jessica was in no position to teach her anymore.

  Hailey gave a little wave, and imagined Jessica waving back. She checked once more to make sure the small leather pack was strapped tight to her waist and would not move, and that her clothes were all fitted tight against her body to reduce resistance. Then, without any further preamble, Hailey climbed over the railing and dove headfirst off the side of the tower.

  For a moment, she did nothing — just closed her eyes tight and let the wind blast her face. Hailey welcomed the rush and the danger, the hint of death waiting below. It was invigorating — right up until Jessica's face popped into her mind.

  With an abrupt thump, Hailey unfurled the mental wings she'd been keeping tight to her back. She could feel the air slam against them as if they were truly a part of her body, and felt herself begin to slide along the air as the great wings held against the resistant atmosphere, supplied with energy sucked out of her core. Her momentum shifted abruptly, starting a much more controlled dive in a graceful arc that carried her mere centimeters above the slope of trees that lead down to the town.

  Hailey let out a shout of exhilaration as she shot past the tips of the firs at breakneck speed. If she let her feet drop any lower, Hailey was certain she'd clip the top of a tree and spin away into an abrupt end to her flight.

  Instead, she managed to carry the glide all the way down to the town, where she swooped in low and landed on the top of the train station at the edge of the forest, which was currently closed. The town only saw two trains per day at most, as they had to travel along a slow winding route through the forest to reach Rallsburg, which increased travel time significantly for those wanting to reach the coast. As such, most trips bypassed the town — with its distinct lack of notable landmarks — entirely in favor of an express route straight to the beach. The usual trains that came in were mostly commercial transport, mail and other such necessities.

  However, since a day or so prior, not a single train had arrived. Hailey had tried to spot a track blockage from the top of the tower, but the forest was so thick that it seemed impossible. She'd considered taking a longer glide along the track route to really test out her wings, but with no reliable way to return and Jessica dependent on the meagre income and food she brought home, Hailey didn't want to risk getting trapped out in the forest.

  She wasn't sure how long she could glide, or how much altitude she could really gain from actually flapping her wings, but Hailey knew it couldn't last too long no matter how many gems she might bring along. The fatigue set in fast, even on the brief glide down from the tower. When it overwhelmed her, Hailey was at risk of simply passing out in mid-air and falling to a very painful crunch.

  Hailey walked to the edge of the station and perched on the side. She really did feel like a bird sitting at the ledge, and even folded the (non-existent) wings in her mind to complete the image. With her legs dangling off the side, she pulled out a couple sandwiches from the bag tied at her waist and began to eat while she watched the town moving about its business.

  She didn't want to admit it, but Hailey was avoiding her home. Hailey refused to see Jessica as a burden, and she still loved her best friend to the end of the world and back — but she felt too much guilt and sorrow every time Jess opened her mouth and only incomprehensible sound came out.

  Hailey hadn't given up, and wouldn't ever give up, but she was totally out of leads. She took to the skies whenever she could, hoping that the wide empty expanse could help her think. It hadn't, but it at least brought her a sense of calm and peace — up until she became too exhausted to keep flying and had to land once again, sometimes in very conspicuous places.

  It was a miracle Hailey hadn't been seen yet. The closest call had come when she'd been near one of the mansions on the east side of town. She'd been shocked to see her economics teacher, Professor Laushire, wandering the garden with a pensive look. Hailey had dove for the hedges on the edge and landed rather uncomfortably atop it, laying as still as possible and only taking flight once again hours later. Jessica had been in a panic when she'd finally returned — well after dark — but Hailey was fairly certain that the fiery haired professor hadn't spotted her.

  Here though, sitting on the train station above town, Hailey spotted something odd. There were a good number of people converging on town hall. Something was going on today, wasn't it? Hailey couldn't quite remember. She thought she might have seen an invitation to a special town meeting or something, passed out by a surly looking deliveryman.

  Well, she had nothing better to do, and another couple hours to kill before she had to go to work. Hailey finished off her lunch and locked her bag tight against her waist again. She checked down each street carefully before diving off the roof of the train station and snapping her wings out once more. She drifted gently down to the ground a block or so away and landed with a hard thump. Hailey brushed the dirt off her pants and set off for the hall.

  Maybe she'd run into some of her old friends there.

 

 

 

 

 

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