2.47 Weakness
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An hour or so later, we had taken care of most things before evening. Dinner proved uneventful, and currently, the elf and I were in the middle of awkward silence. I had both of my minds working on a solution to get to talk to Cellestra.

I was facing down at my pedipalps with which I was absent-mindedly tapping the grass before me.

“Lost in thought again, aren’t you?” Cellestra asked kindly.

I nodded.

“Worries, or...?”

“No. I’m just… I don’t know. I suck at holding conversations. I want to talk about things, but I don’t know what would interest you.”

“Hmmm,” Cellestra let out, thinking. “Where were we last time? I think I asked you for your favorite food, right?”

I nodded again.

“How about… future plans? I’m sure you’ve thought about that before.”

“I have,” I said. “And I’m terrible at looking more than a few days ahead. There are so many unknowns yet that I don’t know if I’ll be able to plan anything.”

“Let’s say things go as we hope they will go. We find your parents and things go well. What would your next step be?”

I thought about it for more than a few seconds.

“If that is the case,” I started. “I think there isn’t a whole lot of choice for me, to be honest. I promised to help you so I’ll be focused on that as much as I can.”

“Forget about that, for now,” Cellestra said. “Elysa told you that as long as you use her magic on me every now and then, I’ll be fine. Think about what you want to do.”

“What I want to do? I guess doing dungeons could be one of the things I should be good at. I’ll probably pick up some useful spells and abilities doing that. Besides that, I think I’d try to get friendly with the local town. It’d be helpful for me to be on good terms. Do you think they’ll have a guild? And if they do, do you think we could join?”

“That’s… difficult to answer. I’d like to say yes, but I don’t know what kind of leader your parents’ village has… that is, if they are still there.”

I sighed. “I suppose that’s true. You see? I can’t plan anything like this.”

Cellestra smiled slightly. “Does it matter much where they are? We will find them. I doubt they will have gone far. What was the village where Elysa had placed them called again?”

“Thymhil,” I answered. “Getting there shouldn’t be much of a problem as long as we can cross the border to Len Asari.”

“Then once we’re there, we look further. We will find where they are and then check the local village, wherever that is. I’m sure they’d be happy to have at least one very capable adventurer to join their guild if they have one.”

“You’re quite capable yourself too, Cellestra. Don’t underestimate yourself.”

“Well, I suppose it’s true that your spells do make me a lot more reliable. Without those, I would have never thought about joining a guild because, you know.”

I nodded. “Yeah. I know.”

It was unnecessary to mention her spells could backfire. I understood full well that even if she wanted to, it was unlikely others would want to team up with her. Just thinking about that made me feel sorry for her.

“Then again,” I started. “I doubt we’d need anyone else. I think I would much prefer to clear dungeons with just the two of us. Come to think of it, there is one more reason why it’s probably important to do all that.”

“Which is?” Cellestra asked.

“Hograd...” I said the name with disgust.

Even if I’d found a good friend in Cellestra, and that thanks to Elysa I was more powerful than I’d ever been, even with all the happiness I’d already found there was no doubt in my mind that his intentions were the worst kind of evil. Though I didn’t even know the reason behind it, I knew it could be nothing good.

Without Elysa’s blessing, I would have been long dead, after all.

“Elysa told me to be careful of his name for a reason. If his followers are as bad as he is, I have no doubt in my mind they will eventually come for me once Hograd knows where I am. I need to be prepared for when that ultimately happens.”

“Sounds a bit ominous,” Cellestra said softly.

I chuckled. “You know me. I want to be… I need to be ready. Never again will I be helpless.”

The elf nodded. “I see.” She paused for a second. “I admire your determination. It’s one of your strong points.”

“And my weak points?” I asked with a sly smile.

“No idea, actually. You’re friendly, kind, honorable, and pretty damn strong. Maybe you worry too much? Does that count?”

“That’s… I guess,” I said in resignation.

“But that’s also a good thing,” Cellestra said, smiling. “It shows… character. Your worries are also reasonable.”

“Thank you. That’s… nice to hear. I can’t wait until they are past us.”

“Someday soon they will be,” Cellestra said warmly.

All I could do was smile at her words.

“Yeah. I’d love to spend some time with you while I don’t have to worry about others.” I sighed as my mood changed abruptly.

Cellestra suddenly stood up and walked over to me where she knelt. She then took me in for a hug, catching me by surprise. I recovered quickly and wrapped my arms around her. I closed my eyes as I relaxed.

“Why?” I whispered after a while.

"Hugs are nice, and you looked like you could use one," Cellestra whispered back. 

 

I chuckled slightly. "Yeah, but you know how I feel."

I didn’t want the hug to stop, but I felt she needed to know what worries this brought. "I like this. I like you." I admitted again. "But I worry about doing these things with you. What you think, what you want, if I'm pushing you, if you'll like me too." 

 

The elf lightly rubbed my back. "You worry too much," she said with a shy smile, not letting go. "You always do. Just enjoy the moment… like me," She added with not much more than a whisper. 

 

"I'll try," I said, forcing myself to relax and just focus on the elf in my arms. Eventually, she let go, still with that shy smile.

"We should get some sleep so we're ready for that troll checkpoint tomorrow," She suggested.

“Let’s do that, yes.”

The sun was low over the horizon, but it wasn’t quite time for it to set yet. It was still early, relatively speaking and darkness wouldn’t fall for another hour or so. Still, we were up very early today, so it made sense to go to bed early as well.

Cellestra sat down at my side and made herself comfortable in my long spider hairs while placing the wolf pelt over her body. Once she was comfortable, she closed her eyes and relaxed. I laid myself down on top of myself after that, my head slightly off to the side, close to hers, and cast my healing light spell.

It just felt so good to be close to her…

“Good night, Cellestra,” I said as I made myself comfortable.

“Good night.”

I then focused all my attention on my spider parts and relaxed. Soon enough, I felt the connection between my two bodies fade and then cut off as my elven half fell asleep. When the sun finally set, I made sure to pay attention to my thermal vision. It was unlikely there would be anything nearby, but I had the task of keeping watch and I would take that seriously.


At first light, Cellestra stirred. As usual, I woke myself up in response. Soon enough, we were having breakfast, or rather, the elf was having breakfast. I would do with a cup of tea.

“I wish we had some milk,” The elf let out as she sipped on her own tea. “I don’t always put it in tea, but sometimes it’s nice.”

“Hmmm,” I let out. “That makes me wonder. If I eat a cow, could it give me an ability to produce milk the same way I can produce water right now?”

“That’s… one hell of an odd thought, Kealyna. Imagine if you could, though.”

“I doubt it’s something I would do, considering most cows are someone’s property. I’m not going to be eating people’s property.”

Cellestra chuckled. “I doubt the farmers would like that.”

“I’ll stick to eating things that might give me useful combat upgrades, like that weird apenoth creature.”

“That was that thing in the dungeon, right? In the snow area.”

I nodded. “Who knows what other kinds of spells are there, just waiting for me to eat.”

Cellestra laughed at my words. “By the goddess, Kealyna. You sound like you’re some kind of maniac when you talk like that.”

“It kinda does, doesn’t it?” I said, smiling, happy to know that the elf liked my joke.

“It’s funny, though.” Cellestra paused for a few seconds as she watched the chunk of star metal next to the linen bag.

I could see why the metal had caught her attention. In the light of early morning, its luminescence was even more extraordinary. The veins seemed to show more colors now as well, creating a spectacle that only a few would ever see.

“I can see why that would be expensive,” Cellestra let out.

“Believe me, it’s used for more than just weapons as far as I know. It’s coveted by many people, including jewelers for reasons that couldn’t be more clear to you than now.”

“Think you could save a piece?” Cellestra asked softly.

“Of course, weapons don’t need as much of this as you think. What would you like to use it for, anyway?”

“I would love to have some kind of amulet made of it.”

I smiled. “Yeah. Don’t worry about it, but let’s be on our way, shall we?”

The elf nodded and reached for the metal, watching it as she put it on the closed bag. “Let’s go.”

I can't legally be held accountable for sugar overdoses. 

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