The last few days, Amelia had essentially taken up Hummer’s place on the common room couch, reading old magazines and generally feeling miserable.

By old magazines, she truly meant old. Mino’s collection of idle reading materials were outdated to the point that many of the magazine covers had full-color paintings of that Great Hero and friends, back when they were still in Sunwell doing their little adventures. Amelia had not yet been reactivated, so her entire life had existed in the wake of what happened all those years ago.

Without the Great Hero, she suspected, without the destruction of the Dungeon Core, she may never have existed. And, similarly, Newpool would never have been devastated by horrific experiments and brutal excavations. With the main foe of Fleettwixt finally defeated, the North Sunwell Company learned they had nothing left stopping them from fully exploiting the rest of the continent.

Also, there were a lot of celebrity gossip magazines. One from a publication titled “Insider Scoop” from several years ago that showed off the Grand Champion, Hollis Hargrave, on the cover. Her head was bowed and armor cracked as she faced a famously humiliating defeat at the hands of, of course, that spiky-haired hero. The cover headline read: “Champion Dethroned: What’s Next for Hargrave?” and below it, “Did her affair with Molly G’ngo cost her the match?” Then, Amelia found another one from just a couple years ago showing her again, but with a brand-new set of armor, looking into the sky mightily and brandishing her twin wind sabers. “A New Day for Hollis Hargrave,” it read.

Somehow, despite Amelia’s complete disinterest in the goings-on of the influential and powerful of Fleettwixt, she felt somewhat engaged by the novel-like storyline this Grand Champion had undergone. She fell to her lowest point, became embroiled in controversy over her womanizing ways, then suddenly rebounded back into the public eye, stronger than ever. A mighty half-human, half-sun-elf warrior that symbolized everything strong about the city in these post-Dungeon Core times, or something of that theme.

The newest Insider Scoop magazine in the hostel’s collection (from four months ago) did not feature the Grand Champion on the cover, but did contain a story about her being sighted in public with a musician named DJ Koin. She was a former geomancer turned artist who made even more frequent appearances around these old issues. Whether the two had any connection beyond professional was left to be confirmed, but that did not stop the magazine from speculating based on the photographs they had obtained. Hargrave’s win record at the Coliseum still was completely unmatched, regardless of the gossip; in her two hundred years as the Grand Champion, she had lost only five matches, and two of them were to the spiky-haired hero.

Amelia did not intend to become invested in the lives of people she had never met, but while she recovered from her system’s immense soul processing glitches, this was about the best she could do. Crossword puzzles were too easy, and she did not have the attention span for entire books, not unless she and Ed read them together. The cooking magazines were interesting, but also did not have enough articles in them to engage her, and contained far too many North Sunwell Company ads for brand-new home appliances that used soul gems—that is, most likely, glossals sacrificed for profit—to power them. Golem “smart appliances.” The thought of them made her metaphorical blood boil. So, with all that in mind, the celebrity gossip was the safest, most mildly engaging thing she could read in these sick days.

Reading all these magazines had helped lift her spirits. The last time she felt this bad off, after wrecking the harvesting plant warehouse, all she did was mope in bed for a week until Mino cheered her up. Now, at least she could do something other than take long baths and brood.

This afternoon, no one was in the hostel to talk to. Not that she was in the mood for chatting, but it was unnaturally quiet this time of day. Even that orc Gruzut had not come home yet to go to straight to her room as she always did. Mino was here, but she was currently cleaning the bedrooms and washing the sheets. A few short-term guests had checked out of Room 4 on the third floor and left behind a very big mess, by the sound of her grumbling. More than a few times, Mino passed through the common room to the laundry room, mumbling something along the lines of, “Not enough gold in the world for this kind of...”

At least there was Otto here to give her some unneeded attention. He sat patiently by the couch, waiting for the exact moment that Amelia would give him pets, blissfully unaware that she was never going to do that. He was no longer barking at her presence, nor was he rubbing his body on her legs, so at least he had passed into this new stage of relative obedience, as annoying as it was.

She also never kept out of her mind the fact that, apparently, Otto was an olm, a legendary beast species from the Manadhmeth Dungeon that feasted on souls for sustenance. This particular olm was docile enough, but the fact that Amelia was a nice juicy soul cornucopia likely made it at least a little tempting to pounce and devour her, just like that giant tentacled daika from Floor 5 last week.

Otto did not seem like he was going to attack and kill Amelia, but if that time ever came, she would unfortunately be ready to defend herself.

In the meantime, she continued to relax and read these old Insider Scoop magazines while her body recuperated.

Soon enough, Mino finished up with her solo cleaning duties and came back down to the first floor, out of overalls and back in a cute quilted dress, and sat down at the service counter. She shuffled some papers around, trying to look busy, but after a few minutes passed and she reshuffled the papers back into their original places, it was clear she was not very interested in her current job.

“You good?” Amelia asked.

“Yeah, yeah,” she said. “Don’t mind me. I’m organizing while I wait.”

“Wait for what?”

“New guests, of course.” Mino gave a big, very fake smile.

“I don’t think anyone is checking in today,” Amelia said. “It’s halfway to dinnertime.”

“Ah, well, most short-term guests check in around this time, actually. They realize they need a place to stay for the night, and they just find the closest rooms available. About the same time you came, in fact. I can pull up the registration log and show you.”

Was anyone actually wandering the streets of Beechhurst right now, looking for a room? It was highly doubtful. If this place were more active, she probably would not still be staying here, for the danger it would pose, so she was secretly thankful.

“I think you’re fine, Mino.”

“You should relax and keep reading your magazines.” She shut down the conversation just like that.

After a while, the other boarders began to return to the hostel one by one, as they often did around this time. First, Phelia ended her shift at the local weapons shop, Beech’s, and went up to her room. Gruzut arrived later, hurrying upstairs to go to sleep so fast that even Mino had no time to greet her. Then Hummer came back, apparently having gone on a day trip somewhere without really telling anyone. She looked much healthier now, almost fully recovered except for her walk being a touch staggered. She did not look particularly joyful, however. Her teeth seemed permanently affixed to her bottom lip, giving her an anxious expression.

Aeo returned a while later along with a faun, a woman in middle age who looked not unlike the drug dealer Amelia killed many weeks ago. She hated how her mind went immediately to the images of people she had murdered, and tried desperately to push the thought away. Hummer said some pleasantries, but after that mostly ignored them, lurking around like she was waiting for something.

With all the boarders back in the hostel, the volume raised a little bit more, and Amelia realized her couch-hogging was probably no longer acceptable. She stood up, pretended as if her legs were fully functional again, and walked over to the service desk where Mino was halfway into a new book titled, “Investing Made Easy! Fleettwixt Edition.” Amelia said nothing to her, but simply gazed at her for a moment before turning her attention back to the trio in the common room.

Aeo and her companion quickly took her place on the couch to commence bog-standard flirting, the exact same kind Aeo always did when she was with someone new. The companion took one big look at Amelia and her pale face went red.

Phelia came back down, having changed into a long, fur-covered dress (made for goblins, but with tail and wing holes cut out). Hummer, seeing her, grew a goofy grin and greeted her, and they started chit-chatting about their day. Then, after a while, they turned to Amelia.

“Oh, hi there,” Phelia said, as if not even seeing her until then. “What have you been up to today?”

“Rest and relaxation,” Amelia said. “Letting my soul gem recover.”

“Just what the doctor ordered, huh?”

“Mino suggested it.”

“I’m the doctor of the hostel,” Mino said instantly, still keeping her eyes fixed to her book. “What I say goes.”

Phelia giggled. “Well, Hummer, are you ready?”

“Yeah, of course. Always.”

The two pranced out of the hostel together and, after the door shut, Mino looked up and shot a glance at Amelia. She traded one back.

“Anything going on there?” Amelia asked.

“You tell me.” Mino smirked. “You were the one with Hummer all day in the deep, dark dungeon. I’m sure you know her real well by now.”

Amelia highly disliked the implication she had brought. “She’s as thick as an untapped maple tree. That’s all I can say.”

“Yeah, sounds about right,” Mino said with disappointment that Amelia did not give her any juicy Insider Scoop-level gossip. “Well, I’m staying out of that whole deal.”

“Whole deal?”

“Oh, you weren’t there for it. We had a guest named Philip a while back, and there was a big thing with him and Phelia. I don’t know if Hummer was involved, but it got bad enough that Philip ended up leaving, so... Make of that what you will.”

“I regret asking.”

“Oh, don’t pretend you aren’t interested. I know you’re a big old nosy grandma trapped in your hot buff body.”

She did not deny it openly, though she knew Mino was wrong. About being nosy, that is; she already knew very well how attractive people found her.

“Hey, did Hummer cook anything?” Aeo shouted to Mino. “I’m famished, but if we don’t got anything, we’re just going to the grocer.”

“No, there’s nothing ready,” Mino said. “Who’s your new friend?”

Aeo beamed. “This is Angeli.”

Angeli waved. “I’m Angeli. Hi.” Another look and blush Amelia’s way.

“She came to the tattoo parlor a while back, and it turns out we’re both really into classical music.”

“Wow, classical music. That sounds exactly like an Aeo type of thing,” Mino said, not even attempting to conceal her sarcasm.

Angeli pulled down her shirt and showed a shiny, faintly glittering tattoo of a soaring bird near her collar bone. “Isn’t it so neat? Aeo’s great. She’s so sociable.”

“Isn’t it weird to date a client?” Mino asked.

Aeo shrugged. “The entire world is my client.”

“Uh-huh.”

“Anyway, we’re going to Orctown for a big concert, and a hot date.” At this last line, she turned and poked Angeli on the nose. The faun giggled relentlessly.

“That’s where I’m going tomorrow,” Amelia said. Contingent on if she felt well enough to travel, that is.

“Great place, I think,” Aeo said. “After the concert, we’re gonna party it up, and then... Well, we’ll see.” She winked.

Amelia wondered how they would go to a concert or even buy food, considering that Aeo was perpetually out of money ever since she bought that rifle.

It seemed Mino had been wondering the exact same thing. “Are you sure you, you know... have the money for all that? Food and a concert?”

Aeo gulped. “Haha, you kid, you kid.”

“Do you want me to whip something up really quick?” Mino asked. “Sandwiches or something?”

“No!” Aeo shouted. “I can’t trust you with that.”

Mino’s head slumped. It was true; she was a famously terrible cook, even for the simplest of things.

Amelia sighed. She decided to hold back on her secret power no longer, and went into the kitchen. Everyone’s heads turned in confusion.

***

“Wow, Amelia!” Aeo exclaimed, halfway into her tuna salad meal. “You’re a good cook!”

Amelia, standing over Aeo, Mino, and Angeli as they ate their early dinner, folded her arms and managed to mostly suppress an expression of smug satisfaction.

“For someone who doesn’t eat, you really made this work,” Aeo continued, lavishing praise on the woman as if she had just saved her life.

“She doesn’t eat?” Angeli asked.

“Long story. Doesn’t matter.”

“My sense of smell is very strong,” Amelia said. “That’s all I need.”

Amelia went back into the kitchen, took the leftover tuna, and dumped it into Otto’s food bowl. He chomped it all up, but then made a quiet gurgling sound, as if it disagreed with him. Considering that olms fed on soul energy, perhaps giving him meat was a poor idea, but he did have a mouth, and he kept the food down, so perhaps it was good enough.

“We should have made you the house cook ages ago,” Mino said. “Except that you already help me with the vegetable patch, and you clean sometimes... Oh, Amelia, I’m treating you like an employee. I’m such a—”

“I’d love to cook for you,” Amelia said, cutting Mino off. “Occasionally,” she added.

Amelia did not explain the reason she was good at cooking, which was simply to impress Ed and keep her happy when they lived together on the farm. Basically every skill Amelia ever learned, she did it for her girlfriend.

If only sewing had been one of those.

“Actually, I’ll cook more often, but I need a favor.”

“Oh yeah? What favor?”

“You love to sew, right, Mino?”

She tilted her head back and forth. “Well... Quilting’s more my thing, but I like sewing, too. Especially when I get to patch up all your clothes every time you ruin them. I think they look prettier with more character to them.”

“Can you teach me to sew better?”

“You can’t sew?”

“Not really.” Her left cheek went hot.

Now it was Mino’s turn to beam. “Sure thing! If you keep making food this good, I’ll get you sewing in no time!”

Amelia felt the need to grumble to herself that she was far too deep into this hostel lifestyle by now, and that these temporary friends she had made were simply delaying her pursuit of revenge. Unfortunately, by now, she had become fully unable to brood about this situation; she genuinely enjoyed it here.

---

Today's Shoutout: Sometimes you need a comic like My Dragon Girlfriend in your life (Warning: NSFW, and also non-NSFW episodes are still thirst traps for the sapphically inclined).

---