POV - Zahra

We've been on the move for a couple days now. The entire trek has been the same. Wake up, jog until noon, the hunters go out to find food for that night while the gatherers find things for us to eat on the go, and we jog again until evening. Because of Lia's bag, we can keep a much quicker pace than we could have before.

When Granny got the oracle, I didn't know what to expect. I was nervous and excited to meet the person that could be our savior. From the oracle, I even thought I could become the first elven ruler recognized by the [system] in a thousand years. Granny and everyone had always told me that someday, I would become the Queen of the Elves. They said my kindness to everyone would make me a great queen, loved by everyone. When Lia introduced herself as the Queen of the Vampires, I was excited to see how kind a real queen was. How could she not want to help us?

‘Pardon if this sounds callous, but what is the reason I should help you? A civil war like this could be seen as a consequence of the mistakes the last king made in joining the Vampire War and believing nonsense.’

When she said that, I was so angry. How dare this person say she was a queen and insult my ancestors! My great-grandfather was tricked! It wasn't his fault! He just loved and believed in his son! He should be remembered as a great king!

Somehow, Granny convinced her to help us. Just as I was starting to calm down, Lia came back and asked for us. Walking outside, she had one of my people trapped and immobilized. I tried to draw my sword but Granny stopped me.

After explaining what might have happened, she did have a point, but I thought nobody here that I've talked to would ever do something like be a spy. They all look at me with warm smiles. Lia and Granny went back to get the other people he mentioned after she promised not to kill them. Maybe I can find out if this is all a big misunderstanding and they can all join us again. That's it! I'll sort out the misunderstanding and convince them to stay with us!

Just as I saw the others walk up and was about to tell Lia I wanted to try to convince them, their heads all fell in only a second. She promised! How could she do that?! She tricked them with her words. How can this person possibly be a queen? She isn't kind at all! This person is more evil than even the elves chasing us!

Then she wanted me to kill the man on the ground. I don't want to kill him! I'm not evil. He's one of my people. He just made a mistake. He could change! Looking down at him, at his eyes begging not to be killed, I couldn't do it. I dropped down and cried. 

Then Talon killed him, and I could only watch as the life was drained from his eyes. Is this evil person really whom the gods sent to save us? Then she grabbed my face.

'Zahra Zarate. As you are right now, I will not recognize you as a queen. I can also guarantee you that Queen Nikita and King Rancorock will also deny the current you.'

She said that not even the other rulers will recognize me? Are all rulers this evil? When she finally walked away, I just sat there, broken. All the excitement I had for meeting the person who would save us was gone. My hope was replaced with dread. 

Granny walked up and got down with me and hugged me tight. "I'm sorry, my sweet ZaZa. I failed in raising you. I never prepared you enough or taught you enough. I'm so, so, sorry."

After a few seconds, I shook myself from my shock. "Why are you apologizing? This is all that evil vampire's fault."

She just pulled back a bit and looked at me with a sad, pitying smile. What could she possibly apologize for?

"I'm apologizing because everything Queen Midnight said was the truth."

...What? How could that be? I just stared at her. Maybe she could see my confusion, because she continued.

"If what he said was true, that there are hundreds waiting for us, then Queen Midnight just saved all of our lives. Taking this group with us is also impossible, and keeping them alive is a huge risk. Your great-grandfather did fail us. Nobody talks about it because it's such a painful and embarrassing thing to admit. To see and admit one's faults is always the hardest thing to do. By joining the Vampire War with almost all of our people, your great-grandfather doomed us, even to this day. She was right. 

"Every decision you make as a ruler can have lasting effects. Right now, I'm sure she's heading to the other camp. If she'll kill them all, or only some of them, I don't know. By asking her to spare as many as she can, I'm asking her to put us all at risk. Every person she spares there is one more that could one day kill us. For our safety, it would be much better if she killed them all."

"...But we could try talking to them…" I weakly mutter.

"Oh, ZaZa. My dear, sweet, ZaZa. The time for talking is long gone. They would kill all of us without a second thought. That's what a war is. War is horrible and makes people do terrible things. I'm asking Queen Midnight to dull the dagger pushing at our back. When she could easily remove the dagger, I merely asked her to blunt it a bit. 

"I'm greedy. I want too much. I want us all to survive, but I also want our race to remain as large as it can, so that one day, we can all join together under one banner again. I'm an old fool, and asked the person trying to protect us to keep us in danger. 

"Think over her words, ZaZa. And never call her evil. From what I've seen, she's a good queen who loves her people and will protect them with everything she has. She would even go so far as to become something I don't think she truly wants to be. I failed to prepare you to be Queen of the Elves, but she can make you ready. Listen and learn from her, ZaZa. I really do believe that she can teach you how to become a wonderful queen. Don't lose your kind heart, but you need to realize that the majority of people you will meet are not so kind.

"I love you more than you'll ever know, ZaZa. My love for you made me fail you. Please forgive this old, foolish elf, ZaZa. I pray to Order and Chaos that you'll be able to realize your dream without losing who you are."

Granny got up and began moving the bodies to a small clearing and piling them with some wood nearby. I began silently doing the same, and before long, we both used our magic to light and stoke the fire, burning away people we've known and chatted with for years.

That night I thought a lot about what Granny said. Even Granny believes that everything she said was true. That she was a good queen. Then... am I the one who's wrong? 

After thinking about it for hours, I finally came to a decision. If Granny thinks that I can learn something, then I will. I'll become the Queen of the Elves one day. Falling asleep, there's just one problem. Waking up the next morning, I talked to Granny about it.

"Granny, I want to ask her for help, but I'm a bit scared of her."

She just laughed a bit at me with her warm smile. "That's understandable, ZaZa. When faced with someone who is strong enough to kill all of us in mere moments, it's a bit frightening. Yet, she did offer to help you if you asked. Gather your courage and do your best. I know you can do it."

Then Lia called for us again. I was worried. What would she try to make me do next? Did she find more people in our camp, or is there something else wrong?

I wasn't expecting her to apologize. Not for what she said, but how she said it. Then Granny pushed me forward, and I was able to somehow ask for her help. I stayed there bowing, hoping she would help me. I didn't expect to be hit on the head. 

'A queen should never bow to anyone. Always hold your head high. You represent your people. If you're subservient, then all of them are as well.'

She didn't have to hit me to tell me that! After that, we spent the next couple days jogging north to exit our forest. I haven't really had a chance to talk to her. We all leave early in the morning and she comes back after I go to sleep. I was going to try to talk to her yesterday when we stopped at noon, but she was working on making something. Then, this afternoon when we stopped, she seemed free. 

I walk up to her during the break. "Lia, could I talk to you for a moment?"

"Of course, Zahra. What's up?" Her head looks up, but with her armor always on during the day it's a bit hard to tell.

"I've been wondering. Granny says you're a good queen, but I don't think I'm that much like you. What do you think makes a good queen, so I can work to become like that?"

"Hmm…"

She goes quiet for a couple minutes, just thinking about it. Shouldn't it be easy for her to answer? If you're a good queen, shouldn't you know what makes one? If I was to ask a good archer what makes a good archer, they would say almost immediately, 'practice and hard work,' or something along those lines. Why is she struggling so much?

"That's a very ambiguous question, Zahra. First of all, what is good? Where is the line between what you think is good and someone else thinks is good? What each person thinks can be different. To me, if we go off the standard common use of the word, there are a few things that I think are important.

"To me, a good ruler needs to have the support of their people. There are many ways to achieve this. Some get their support from inciting fear of a third party. Some get it through trickery. For my own people, I have their support by offering them safety and the chance at a better life. This brings me to the next part.

"A good ruler should be virtuous to their people. Now, I know you're looking at me like I said something crazy because I've gone out to kill people each night, but those aren't my people. If I go off of the seven standard concepts thought of as virtues, they are faith, hope, charity, fortitude, justice, temperance and prudence. 

Dalia holds up her hands and counts the seven concepts as she explained. "How can someone like me, who will kill without question when it's needed, be virtuous to my people? Hope. By creating a safe haven for my people, and working to better their lives, I give them hope that their futures will be better than their past. 

"Charity. Be it food or clothes, education or training, I've made sure that all of my people have everything that they need, and have given them the skills and power to be able to provide for themselves and not become dependent on my charity. Give a man a fish and feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and feed him for a lifetime. I think the saying goes like that.

"Fortitude. Even when they were on their last leg, being chased by the church, never once did I show them any uncertainty. All of my decisions were made calmly, clearly, and I destroyed what they feared. Courage through adversity is what fortitude is. By doing those simple things, I displayed to them that I could be their rock in a storm.

"Justice. I don't kill indiscriminately. With my own people, we have a set of laws and standard punishments for them. Everyone knows there are consequences to certain actions. Any who break them will be punished justly. My guards will never abuse the people they are tasked to protect. They know they will be punished even more harshly if they ever did so for taking advantage of my trust in them.

"Temperance. The people see me working for them. Every once in a while, they'll also see me spending time with my daughter or wife in town. Although, they see this in moderation. I doubt there is a single citizen that would say I slack off or don't do my duty. Yet, they know I spend time with my family. The things I do are in moderation.

"Prudence. I don't waste the resources I have. The people know this, and also see the caution I take in making many of my decisions. They know that when I act, it's after a lot of thought and with a plan.

"Finally, faith. Through all of my actions, they've gained faith in me. Faith that I will protect them. Faith that I will provide for them. Faith that I won't abuse them or my position. I've received their faith that I'll continue to govern as such.

She puts her hand down and continues. "So, yes. Even someone like me can be a virtuous ruler to their people. Even so, to keep my position in the status quo, I need to be more than just virtuous. That brings me to the third thing I think makes a good ruler.

"There was an old philosopher you've never heard of. He said 'It is better to be feared than to be loved if you cannot be both.' I truly believe this is important for a monarch. The reason you need this is because there will always be someone who wants what you have. People are greedy and covetous of others. This is a fact you should remember well, Zahra. Everybody wants something. The only difference is how far they'll go to get it.

"People will do everything they can to make their lives better or reach their goals at the cost of others. I'm no exception. I'm greedy. I want a peaceful life with my family. To achieve my dream, I'll kill, destroy empires, and eliminate all obstacles.

"Even someone who wants to be the best baker they can be. By selling bread, they're taking business and money away from another baker. They'll do all they can to create the most delicious bread to sell more, which takes more business from the others, maybe even putting them out of a job. Even if they never intended or realized it, by trying to reach their goal, they impacted others. Some positively, some negatively.

She paused and looked at me to make sure I was understanding. "If you become a queen, I can guarantee you that there will be people who will try to take it from you, or at the very least they will think about it.. They will see the power you wield. The things you own, and want them for themselves. 

"Look at your own situation. You're the type of person that is hard to hate. You're pretty, kind, optimistic, cheerful, and overall a lovely person. Yet, because of fear or whatever else, the elves have split apart and you're being hunted by your own people. People act in their own self interest. People would love you, but when threatened or fearful of an outside factor, would turn on you just like those spies did.

"Now, what if you were as powerful as me? What if my people were threatened to turn against me or an army would be sent? What if someone said to them, that if they betray me  they'll receive great riches? I'll tell you. They would scoff at it. The reason being, my people know my power. They are more frightened of me and what I might do to them than they are of anything else. Because they know I would erase them with extreme prejudice.

"That's why it is better to be feared than to be loved, but always strive to be both. Like I had said, I have the faith of my citizens. I believe that most citizens like me and my family. Or at the very least are apathetic and don't dislike us. I don't display my power often, but when I do, it reminds them to keep that healthy fear of me. 

"Fear isn't inherently a bad thing. It tells you to be cautious. People with no fear are usually the first to die in a battle. Being without fear breeds overconfidence and nurtures mistakes. My people fear my power to the point that it wouldn't surprise me if they turned in their own family if they found out they were a part of a revolt and couldn't convince them otherwise. Turn in their own family in hopes that I just prune the infected branches and not uproot the tree as a whole. 

"To be both feared and loved is a balancing act. Having the power to be feared means it's incredibly easy for you to take advantage of it. To take advantage of your people. To throw virtues away and just do what you want. Because, who could stop you? Part of why nobody does anything against the injustice of the human church is that they fear them, and the church takes advantage of this. That's why when I remove those they fear most, with some cajoling, the displeasure of the masses will come out. Like removing the ash over smoldering coals, I'll breathe life into their embers and stoke the fire of revolution inside of them.

"The last thing I believe makes a good ruler is to be intelligent. This doesn't mean to only be smart. It means to think about every situation and how you can come out on top of each. Think about how to use those around you in a way they will agree to something themselves. Example. I'm trying to keep my presence unknown from the other elves as long as possible, but they need to be delayed so we can flee. That's why I turn to assassination and trickery. Using Talon to delay them. If you didn't see it, would you believe someone could befriend a hippogryph?

"You have to be smart, but being intelligent is much more than that. Have reasons for your actions and don't jump to conclusions. Like Dharma said the other night. Use your head and think of the situation. You need to always focus on both the small things, like words being used, and the situation as a whole.

She pats me on my shoulder as I stand there in a bit of a daze, trying to take in everything. "That's my answer, Zahra. Not just for being a good queen or ruler, but a leader of any size. Support of those you lead. Appear virtuous to those you lead. Fear of you or at least the repercussions of going against you, if you cannot also be loved. And be intelligent."

That… was a lot more than I was expecting… Yet, it makes sense. When I think about what Lia has done from a different perspective, she really has been a good leader to us, even in the short time she has been here. She has protected us from both external and internal enemies. She makes water for everyone each morning, afternoon, and night. Using her bag lets us move faster. If she never insulted my great-grandfather or had to kill those spies, I would think she's a great person… Maybe even with those, I still do. I'm not sure. I feel like how I look at the world has just been shaken, and I'm not really sure of what I once believed.

If I think about what she just said and think about my great-grandfather, was he really a good king? He loved his son, but wasn't intelligent with his decision to join the war or to not do something like send someone else to check on his son. Even my grandparents and parents. Everyone before me was loved by their people, but never feared. Then there was a civil war while our main enemy just waited for us to destroy ourselves. If what Lia said is what makes someone a good ruler, he was missing some major pieces. 

I really can't criticize Lia on her assessment of him...can I? She was right. And that hurts. That someone I admired for being loved by his people and having their support, wasn't as good of ruler as I imagined. That I no longer want to be like someone I always wanted to emulate. Why didn't I see this before? Did idolizing someone really make me this blind to their faults? I can't, not, think about it now… He really wasn't a good ruler, was he? Maybe a good and kind person, a good parent, but not a good ruler.

Lia just stood there watching as my mind raced and my view of the world slowly shifted. I don't know if a minute or an hour has passed. 

I eventually ask, "Lia, can a good ruler still be kind? Can someone like me, who has always thought the best of people, still become a good ruler?"

This is my main concern. I'm not like Lia. She isn't as mean as I originally thought, but I can't do what she does, and can never see myself being exactly like her.

She flicks my head. That really hurts! "Did anything I just say make you think you couldn't? Did I ever mention being kind or unkind in my reasons? No, I didn't. I don't think someone's level of kindness is a factor in leadership. You can be as mean as a badger or as friendly as a kitten and still be a good ruler. Of course you can be kind. That's a great thing to be. 

"You just need to realize that not all people are kind. Not everyone has good intentions. Know that people will try to use you or take from you. Know that to be kind to the masses, you'll have to be unkind to those that threaten them. That as a ruler, you'll have to do things you don't like to protect those you care about. As long as you're aware and watch for things like that, and prepared to defend what you care about, be as kind as you want to be. Be kind, but not naïve.

"And as far as 'someone like you' becoming a good ruler? Sure you can. You're asking questions and trying to better yourself, right? That's a big first step. I never said that you would never be able to be queen. I said the current you. Remember, words matter. Don't let your emotions miss things like that. The you that isn't ready to be queen is the naïve you that doesn't recognize someone betrayed you. That tries to draw their sword too quickly due to emotions. That doesn't think of different perspectives or circumstances. That doesn't have the strength to be feared. But, you are young, and you will grow. If you keep improving yourself, I could see you one day becoming a wonderful queen."

"Thank—"

I instinctively go to bow to her in thanks, but stop halfway. This has always been a habit because everyone always did it to me. Granny even tried to make me stop bowing a few times but I never understood why, since it was a way to show my sincerity. I know now. If I'll one day become Queen of the Elves, I'll be an equal to Lia as the Queen of the Vampires. At least in status. This is a habit that must be broken.

Stopping myself, I raise back up and nod. "Thank you, Lia, and please continue helping me."

She nods back. I can't see her face behind her armor, but I think she was pleased. "I said I would, didn't I? Now let's go. It's about time we start to move again."

"Yes!"

Just watch, Granny. I'll learn everything I can, and one day, I'll be a great queen! Better than any ruler the elves have ever had!

=====

POV - Dalia

As I watch the girl run off with renewed energy, I have to think to myself for a while. I'd never really thought about what makes a good ruler before. That whole fucking question got me thinking about myself and my situation as much as hers. Have I actually become a halfway decent fucking ruler?

I always just treated everything and everyone as a means to an end where I get to live peacefully. I've always just done whatever the fuck I want. Helped who I want and set things up so they wouldn't be troublesome for me in the future. I was never fucking trying to be a good queen.

Fuck, I never really wanted to be a queen in the first place. It just kind of happened and would be more convenient for me if I was. If I never got the title, I wouldn't give a shit and still have done everything the same as I have. I would've just done it as 'Dalia Midnight' and not as 'The Queen of the Vampires.' Nothing I've done was because I'm a queen.

Well, whatever. I'll just keep doing what I want and need to do. What people think of me doesn't mean shit. If history says I was good or bad, a saint or a sinner, doesn't fucking matter. I only give a rat's ass about what two vampires and a handful of fairies think of me. 

I swear, Ailine and Anastasia, one day when all this bullshit settles down, we'll be able to just live peacefully. We'll go on nighttime hunts/picnics or visit other places. We'll gaze from the tops of mountains and swim in the ocean.

I swear, I'll make you both happy and be the good wife and mother you both deserve. Ailine will make as many clothes as she wants, Anastasia will draw or paint to her heart's content, and we can all play games together every single day. 

I swear, I'll continue to remove anything in my path to get there. Paving the road with corpses if I must. I'll bloody my hands as much as necessary to keep yours as clean as possible.

As I jog along with the elves once more, I silently harden my resolve once more. I'll get through these damn quests and see the other side. The separatist elves better prepare. All of their fates will be decided by their decisions in the next few days.