A moment of stillness. All that can be heard is the dripping of water from the spout through the steam filled room. A most comforting and kind warmth soothes away the fatigue of the day. After all of the running about, the sensation is almost divine.
But that “almost” is made an absolute divinity as I take in the feeling of the body that rests against mine in the water.
Resting her head against my chest, her eyes are closed as she meditates with deep, measured breaths. Just the sound of her breathing alone sets me even deeper into my peaceful trance. Another perfect moment spent with the woman I love.
That comfortable silence is given a fittingly comfortable resolution as she leans her head to stare into my eyes. And there, reserved for me, is a warm smile that melts my heart like a candle to the flame.
“What a day, huh?”
“I’m glad you’d enjoyed it as much as I did.”
“Of course I would; you were with me the whole time.” She snickers lightly and raises her hand to brush my nose with her fingertips. “How did the meeting go earlier, by the way? I didn’t really get to ask. Not with how you’d swept me off my feet and raptured me away.”
“Suppose I didn’t really leave much room for small talk, did I? But the meeting… That meeting…”
I take pause to recall just what I did before I’d gotten dressed for our date. It’s a strange, forgetful feeling that comes to me, but the day had already had a few of those already so I’m less willing to strain myself over it.
“Well? Going to leave me waiting forever?”
“For some reason I can’t quite remember what I did. Do you remember what I was going out for?”
“You must still be lagging behind after that ordeal with Wrath. I didn’t expect it’d be as grand as it was either, so I’m sure we can let this little senior moment slide.”
“I think I was meeting with a friend… Man, I hope I’m really not becoming a forgetful old man already.”
“I doubt it.” She laughs. “But I should test you a bit. Do you remember this at least?”
She grabs my hands and raises them up her body before setting them on a softer part of her form.
“I’d need to be admitted if I’d forget something this fantastic.”
“Then there’s hope for you yet.” Another flitting laugh comes from her mouth before she turns her body around and leans towards me for a simple kiss. “You used to be so much more of a worrywart, but I’m glad that you’ve given up on that. Even if you’re showing a little remnant of it now. You’ll remember eventually. You always do. For now, just relax.”
“I suppose you’re right. It was really stupid of me to be all worked up like that when I look back. Things worked out just fine after everything.”
Laying eyes on the scar that drives itself across my chest, she begins to trace her finger over it. Softly, gently, she smiles as she sees the wound that has haunted me from my youngest years.
“It has. And it will. And someday…” tucking a lock of her hair behind her ear, she presses her lips against the very center of the scar, “we’ll find the way to make this a thing of the past. I promise.”
No words could ever do my gratitude, my joy justice. So I reach out to her and pull her into my body. I hold her there and close my eyes for a short spell longer, cherishing her.
✩ ✩ ✩
Juna had gone ahead to my room while I’d taken a moment to get something out of my system. Even during our dinner a niggling concern had jumped back into my mind. The only way I could let it settle before calling it a night would be one final visit for the day.
I take notice that a dim, warm light peers through beneath the wood of her door. Unlike what had become usual for me, I knock to make sure that her company would be prepared for another visitor. And the voice responding is exactly who I’d expected I’d be hearing from.
I press on and see a yet sleeping Neptanie accompanied by her golden haired caretaker. Despite that she would usually have a smile for her bedside manner, tonight I’m given even more concern as she wears a gloomy, down turned expression ill fitting for her beauty.
She turns to look at me and her eyes are even worse. Though they’re no longer present, it’s clear to tell that they’d ran with tears but moments prior.
“Hyla? What’s wrong?”
My step is quick to reach her side and there I fall to my knee beside the two as I stare into her cerulean gaze.
“I’m sorry. Please don’t mind… this.” She swipes the sleeve of her white lab coat across her eyes to take away whatever remnants of weeping she could have left. “I’d had something on my mind and I’d come to check on her is all.”
“Well, tears usually aren’t the best sign when it comes to a visit from a doctor.” I say with a little humor for both of our sake. “Is there anything I can do?”
“How did the day go for you two? I’ve been curious.” She redirects the conversation and I haven’t the will in me to fight against that.
“It was a good day. I’d needed it after all I’ve been through.”
“Good. That’s good…” She smiles faintly and takes a breath. “You should enjoy the rest of your night and take some time to rest tomorrow. I’ll talk with you at night, okay? For now, just take care of yourself and Juna.”
“I understand. I’ll hear what you have to say then. For now, whatever is troubling you, stay strong. And if you need me, come and get me.”
“It won’t be anything to intrude on you two. It’s something that we’ll handle when it comes, okay?”
Rising from her seat, she straightens her clothes and her posture before she readies to be on her way. Catching her before she can go off, I peck her on the cheek and gently caress her shoulder in a bid to soothe out even a faint fraction of her troubles.
“Get some rest. I’m going to visit with Neptanie for a little while before I sleep.”
She offers me a small nod and another fragile smile before she steps out and shuts the door.
Again left to the dimness of Neptanie’s room while she sleeps. It had been something more uncommon once upon a time, but it’s become more frequent in recent. Uncomfortably so. But I do what I can with it.
Taking what was previously Hyla’s seat, I scoot it to face Neptanie and lay my hand on her own. Just like that, I watch over her and feel the rising and falling of her chest as I hold her delicate, thin fingers in mine.
✩ ✩ ✩
In step with my entering my room, I yawn deeply. A new set of troubles had come to find me and they’d set themselves hard into my mind already with the innumerable what ifs playing. And Juna picks up on that instantly.
She sits on my bed with her legs tucked beneath her and a thick book opened on its surface. In her pajamas, hair still dampened by our bath and the scent of her shampoo making for an aromatic bouquet that fills the room.
“Something happen?” She asks innocently.
“Well, kind of. I’d hoped that that visit would have taken the edge off, but I’m still worried about her. She was still asleep when I’d returned and I didn’t think to ask Hyla if she’d been asleep the entire day.”
“Don’t go falling back into bad habits now. You’d pulled me out of being a downer and I’ll do the same for you any day. What we can do, we’ll do.”
“I’m just wondering if there’s anything we can do at all. Her sickness… has always somehow reminded me of mine. I’m just…”
“She can be healed and so can you. We’ll find a way. For now…” opening up her arms to me, she beckons me, “why don’t you come here and we’ll put this day behind us?”
Incapable of even dreaming to say no, I approach her and meet her with an embrace. Kicking off the simple slip on shoes I’d worn, I raise my knee onto the bed and gently push her onto her back.
Fingers intertwined, the moonlight peering in for us, I study her perfect features that I’ve always adored. The pale shining platinum adds a dash of starlight into her rose colored eyes, tempting me to come closer.
And as I think of her, look at her and endear her, I remember what I’d felt as I’d watched Neptanie so sound asleep in her bed.
Every bit of me had wished that I could live as her. To see the dreams she’s seen her entire life for myself and to feel how it would be like to carry her illness. Hoping, wishing, dreaming that I could take her by the hand and raise her up and out of her sickness. To come back from her world and take her with me.
Every bit of my love for her, that I could dream as she does.
And every bit of my love for Juna, in this moment, that we would stop being apart and could be one together.
