Chapter 1: Time to get hit by a truck.
Reincarnated as a blade of grass by IsekaiWriter
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I died. I've always wanted to say that. My greatest fear has always been that there's no afterlife, but I died, and I can still think, so my greatest fear was unwarranted all along. This comes along with an issue though. Now what? As far as I can tell, all I can do is think. The last thing I remember was walking back home from the convenience store with my best friend, his name is Jordan, and as we were waiting for the crosswalk man to appear a cat ran into the traffic. "Poor thing" I thought, as a truck came barreling towards it. I saw the driver for just a moment before he swerved away from the cat to hit Jordan and I instead. In my final moments, I had read that his shirt said "I ♡ CATS." Never have I been more scared of cat lovers.

Back to the matter at hand. I'm dead. I can't see.  I can't feel. Actually this is pretty lame. Perhaps not existing at all would have been better.

Since I love anime and whatnot I decided to check if this is one of those reincarnation things and yelled "STATUS" into the mental void.

Name ???
Species Yellow Tundra Grass
Mana 30 (10 regen per day) (30 max)
Skills  
Traits "Relatively transcendent" "Sapient"
Titles  "Pretty lame"

..........

WHAT THE FUCK? Status worked? This really is a fantasy world with magic and whatnot?

 And I'm a BLADE OF GRASS?!?!? And what are these titles? And this trait? I shout "Relatively transcendent" into the void, in hopes that it will give me some information.

Relatively transcendent

Whenever your body is destroyed or ceases to function, your soul will be transferred to the body of your healthiest relative who is younger than your body. This will only work if they do not have a soul.  Only 75% of your mana maximum (rounding up to the tens place), 90% of your mana regen (rounding up to the tens place), and 5 skills of your choosing will be maintained and added to those of your new body. 

Well that's convenient.  I can't be killed as long as I have relatives, and since I'm a blade of grass, I should reproduce without effort. If I were to die now, I wouldn't lose mana since 75% of 30 is 22.5 and would round up to 30.  Hopefully I have a lot of younger relatives already. The only thing that concerns me is what "healthiest" means. Will it prioritize expected lifespan and put me into a baby grass? Or will it put me into a healthy middle aged grass? There's no way for me to know yet. I think I'll look at that title now.

"Pretty lame!"

Pretty lame

The god of titles thinks you're lame. What are you gonna do, cry about it?

Well that's not nice. This serves an important purpose though. Now I know that there are gods, and that they have a lot of control over the titles and statuses of the people in this world. Actually, I don't know if there even ARE people in this world. I can only assume things.

"Sapient"

Sapient

You are part of a species which is not usually sentient, yet you have been granted self awareness. 

Well that explains why despite being a grass I can think. The usage of the term "granted" bothers me. Granted by whom? The gods? My own willpower? This requires investigation.

"Yellow Tundra Grass"

Yellow Tundra Grass

A species of grass that originated in the northern tundras but has spread throughout the world. It has a yellow coloration and grows to nearly half a meter tall if not cut. It can reproduce sexually (through wind pollination) or asexually (via vegetative propagation) like most grasses, but reproduces faster than most grasses. It thrives in open environments, whether hot or cold.

Well that's not very interesting. I yelled out a bunch of other things I hoped were commands like "help", "age", "notes", and "skills" but nothing came up. There must be some prerequisite to access that stuff I don't know about. I seem like a pretty standard grass. The only other thing about my status that struck me as interesting or unusual was the lack of "HP". Thinking about it, though, it makes perfect sense. There's no way to evaluate someone's health as a single number, so of course there's no HP.  First I should probably work out how to get a skill or something that will let me see. I focused really hard on sight and..... nothing. WHAT THE HECK AM I SUPPOSED TO DO? I have no information and nothing to work off of. There's no way for me to find out how to do anything!

At first I was kinda exited to be in a fantasy world but now it turns out that my life sucks! How many years am I going to spend sitting in this void? Who can I rely on to explain things to me? The gods? I don't know what I'm doing!

I spent about 2 more minutes whining to nobody before another screen came up.

System message:

Your body was destroyed at the age of 45 days and due to the trait "Relatively transcendent" your soul was transferred into the 22 day old body of your relative.

Well that's a thing. I guess. I was 45 days old? That is the average age for a blade of grass I guess. We learned that in science class. Jordan and I were doodling during that lesson so I don't know why I remember. I've only been thinking to myself here for like 5 minutes! How long did I spend before I became conscious? Why did it just happen to be right before my body died? Well I guess that doesn't matter. Back to the issue at hand. How do I get skills? I really want to be able to see, and then talk. I wonder how much mana 30 is? How does that compare to the average 20 year old man? Also this answers my question earlier about how "healthiest" relative is chosen. It appears to want to pick something middle aged but very healthy instead of something very young that might die before adulthood.

I pondered all this for maybe 3 minutes before another screen came up.

System message:

Your body was destroyed at the age of 42 days and due to the trait "Relatively transcendent" your soul was transferred into the 23 day old body of your relative.

Wut? 20 days passed in 3 MINUTES? My hypothesis is that grass doesn't think as fast as a human (go figure) so a few minutes to me is a few days in the real world! I think I'll calculate how much slower than a human I'm thinking by counting the seconds and then doing math with it. (days that pass * 24/seconds I count in-between rebirth and death)

After 5 more death messages and a lot of counting and mental math, I've determined that a second for me is 3.6 hours in the real world. Aside from those 15 minutes of math, I really don't have anything to do. I guess I'll just stare into the void. 

1 bottles of beer on the wall, 1 single bottle of beer, take one down, knock it around, 0 bottles of beer on the wall... At least that's how I remember it going. Maybe it's different. I started at 10,000 by the way. According to my best estimate, each bottle takes 10 seconds to knock around, since I prefer not to think much faster than I can speak. Assuming 10 seconds per bottle of beer, it's been 27 hours  from my perspective, or just a bit over a day. That's 40 years in the real world, by the way. There have been over 500 death messages. The youngest grass I was ever put into was 15, and the oldest was 28. Other than that.... nothing has happened. I am incredibly bored. 

And at last, a message literally sent by a god.

Divine message from Dradyja, Goddess Of Plants:

Dear, you can get skills you don't have by simply trying to use them over and over until they are granted to you by the system. It takes years of repetition but that should go by quickly for you since you're a slow thinker. I'll talk to you again in a few decades!

NEVER HAVE I BEEN MORE GRATEFUL FOR A TEXT. Although calling me a slow thinker hurts, even if it's true. This changes EVERYTHING. For the next two hours I put my everything into trying to see until I was granted a beautiful notification.

New skill gained!

Clairvoyance (Rarity: A+) (0.0%)
Allows the user to see from a magic eye whose position they control. The eye is visible to others. It looks like a black circle. This skill is mostly possessed by humans.

Mana cost: 0.1 + (0.5 * "distance from user in meters") per hour

I immediately turned on the skill and saw things for the first time in decades, even if it only felt like a few days. 

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