Earth date: November 12. 11103
Location: Dessix
Outer Territories, Scutum-Centarus Arm
The Citadel
On the pinnacle of the Citadel, Thanatos stood upon the main terrace overlooking the endless jungles of Dessix; it was a cold morning, though nothing different from any other. The breeze was frosty enough to force him to rap his robes tightly around his aging body, his hood covering most of his face allowing now wind to reach his eyes. Behind him stood a monument built on the very peak of the spire, a house for the dead, a place for mourning and reflection. There was no other place in the Citadel Thanatos could find that would allow him the privacy to meditate.
Far beneath him, in a cold stone room sat his prodigy reflecting on the events that had occurred days ago. Though Izzar did not know what had happened, Thanatos was well aware. The young man took his first steps into a world Thanatos only dreamt of taking. He was furious; he needed answers.
Taking in the last breath of fresh air, the cold air burnt his lungs slightly, forcing him to cough. He turned and proceeded back into the crypt. In a small room separate from the main room, he sat down to meditate. It was a space he picked for himself, a place where he could commune with the one beyond the living realm, the one Thanatos had discovered from within the ruin he touched.
“How was he able to block my attack?” Thanatos felt like he asked the question too many times.
A strange and echoing voice filled the room; Thanatos had grown used to it, though there was a time it would have been a voice that would instill fear in the old man.
“You know how he was able to.” The answer seemed to be the only one the entity afforded him each time he asked. Thanatos did not want to believe it, but the evidence was clear; it all pointed to a single explanation.
“But how?” His anger filled the room; he opened his eyes and gnashed on his teeth. It was impossible. He knew Izzar was special, but he never thought it would be possible.
“The Nihil is always present, whether you are aware of it or not. It takes a mere thought to harness its power.” The voice echoed once more, Thanatos had never seen what this entity looked like, but its presence and voice always lingered.
“Why haven’t you taught me to wield its power yet? I’ve done everything you’ve asked of me, and still, you refuse.”
“To harness the power of The Void, one cannot be taught to do so; no amount of training can prepare you.” The voice was stern; Thanatos dared not question it. Nevertheless, he needed wisdom and did not want to anger the entity to the point that he would not answer his questions.
“Then why set tasks out for me to complete? Is it not deemed training?”
“My fragile friend,” the voice grew deep, agitation lingered. “You are too old to recognize the embrace of Nihil; for you to learn its essence, you need to experience things you’ve avoided all your life. The ruins hold much wisdom you have refused to see, and thus it was necessary for the boy to be born; it was the first step towards your enlightenment. Since his birth, you have progressed considerably.” The entity remained silent for a moment; Thanatos listened. “Now, close your eyes.” The entity instructed him; he did as he was asked. “Think about your encounter with Izzar, reflect on his facial expressions and the emotions you could clearly sense from his being, also the thoughts you heard without him speaking. Then, look beyond that and see him in his stone room meditating on his perch, try and be him for a moment, confused, trying to make sense of it all….”
Thanatos reflected; his mind wandered to Izzar; he could see him on his meditation spot in the small stone room. However, it was not only Izzar that he was trying to focus on but everything else happening within the Order was also occupying his mind. His thoughts were clouded, unclear; he was unable to focus on a single thing.
“Focus!” The entity shouted. The room vibrated around him; he clenched his eyes closed even tighter. “Forget about everything else, forget about the galaxy and forget about the damned Order; if you are to wield power you so desperately seek, then you must try and forget about everything and focus.”
Thanatos focused on clearing his mind, trying very hard to bring his thoughts to Izzar. Finally, he envisioned the white-sanded courtyard where he held the sword to strike Izzar down; he saw the broken and bruised Izzar laying on the floor, unable to move. He was instructed during his meditations to kill Izzar; he was merely following directions.
The feeling on the tip of his toes when he kicked Izzar to the side felt too real; he was there again. The boy only stared up at the monk standing over him. Thanatos, not knowing what the boy was thinking, angered him enough to push forward.
His body started to shake as the memory of that morning returned, the thoughts he had when seeing the boy just laying there. It was his failure, one his father had predicted decades ago. His anger sweltered, not for the boy but towards his failure as an Epsimus; he was not going to save the Order. Everything was going to be lost, and an empire that stood for nine thousand years would end with him.
Thanatos gave up everything to follow the instructions of the elusive entity in his mind; he even gave over the mantle of leadership to his sworn enemy. He was angry that he ever landed on Dessix and discovered this entity, which he had not yet received the promises given to him. For forty years, he has searched for the ruins that would teach him these powers just to be told it could not be taught.
His thoughts lingered back to the courtyard; Izzar was standing before him, there was a glow in his eyes Thanatos had never seen before. He was healed; there was no more blood coming from his wrists; he stood like he was at full strength, “No.” He mumbled in the present.
“Yes, you saw it; your envy grows even more now. You want his power. Forget about what had happened that morning, and focus on Izzar where he is now.”
Thanatos tried again; he focused hard, trying to think the same way Izzar would at that moment. It was difficult; his mind could not settle down. He tried harder. Trying to think back to his training days, where he was placed under the pressure of performing. His mind kept wandering to his father; his face was a blur to him now that he could hardly remember what he looked like after so many years. Just as Izzar, he was brought up by the monks of the Citadel. Though the four hundred and ninety-nine monks of his childhood had passed away decades ago, the monks in the Citadel at the point of Izzar’s birth were the third generation from Thanatos’s birth.
He finally focused on Izzar; he has only ever seen Izzar meditate on his perch once in his lifetime. Though it proved enough to envision an older Izzar sitting there reflecting. The boy seemed troubled, confused, angry, and frustrated; his shoulders were up, his lips were flaring, sweat ran down from his brows. With hands clenched tightly, he seemed to be restless within his thoughts. Thanatos felt his emotion; he understood his confusion for the first time. The boy was fighting a massive battle within his heart.
“That is it, my old friend, you’re doing it.” The voice echoing in the background broke his concentration, he tried to focus again, but it was difficult.
“That, my old friend, is an ability of The Nihil.”
Thanatos’ heart raced; he opened his eyes with a smile.
“So, it can be taught.” He retorted.
“Indeed, I can teach you to clear your mind and focus, but there are abilities such as blocking an opponent’s attack that cannot be taught unless you are familiar with the nature of The Nihil.”
It was like a scroll opened before Thanatos, finally understanding some aspect of the abilities he sought. He closed his eyes again, knowing only repeated practice could make something perfect. He tried to focus again; his mind still clouded. He thought it would be easier this time. Though it was not.
His mind focused on the dead beyond the door in the main chamber of the Citadel’s peak. He longed for those trapped within their crypts to be amongst the living once more. His thoughts wandered off to days long gone, a time where his Empire was not a threat, and his life essence was not draining.
“The ability to bring back those who had passed pales in comparison to what you can achieve. Though you need to understand no ability used through The Nihil comes without consequences. The effects of the power Izzar used I cannot yet see, though trust me, The Nihil does not forget to collect on its debts.”
“What kind of consequences can we expect?” Thanatos abandoned his attempt at focusing on Izzar; his last thoughts took him to a place he wished he’d rather not visit.
“Blocking an incoming attack from a sword might alter the destiny of either Izzar or yourself; it is not clear to me yet.”
“Is there no way of knowing?”
“Unfortunately, no, there is not, my old friend. My own use of The Nihil gifted me eternal life as I desired; however, it was not the life I expected. And thus, I would always caution against the excessive use of The Void.”
Thanatos understood, the lessons this entity had for him were endless; his experience in the forces they were dealing with could not be compared to any other. Nevertheless, Thanatos was looking to live, not to vanish into the unknown abyss of history.
“Will The Nihil cause consequences due to the ability I had just used?” Thanatos was now wary of using any small power.
“Your darkened eyes.” Said the entity; Thanatos could feel a soft breeze rush over his eyelids.
Thanatos shook his head; he had wondered about that himself.
“I’ve used this power before? You mean to say that the visions that I’ve experienced and the traveling across the galaxy through my mind was not your doing?”
“I can incite the idea of the action in your mind, but I cannot teach you how it is done or force you to do it against your will. It is an idea, a thought to action, doing without thinking, but focusing on doing. The concept is not one easily understands. Your mind is scattered, unfocused, unbalanced. It is impossible to instill these ideas in your mind when it is not calm and open. You seek a goal, but you fail to see a clear path towards achieving it. You think of a million problems before you arrive at the one that matters. To find Izzar in your thoughts, it should not have been such a difficult task; it is a task that would have taken you seconds to achieve if your mind was not so scattered.”
Thanatos lowered his head in shame, the entity spoke the truth, his mind was straying, and he struggled to remain focused.
“Teach me how to let go of three hundred years of problems.”
“My old friend, I would not presume to know your mind. I have been around for eight thousand years, of which I spent fifty in the physical realm, and I still have many troubles I hold close to my heart, clouding my mind in difficult times. Therefore, only you can learn the ability to clear your mind.”
Thanatos understood; he lowered his head. He could not forget his troubles, for they were many. His supposed end was near; he could feel it in his bones; the entity had confirmed this. Though he would argue that the future was never set in stone, it could change profoundly though still stay the same.
“Izzar has not experienced the pain of loss or the burden of responsibility yet. His mind is an open scroll eager to write itself. This planet being a conduit for The Void is the right place for a powerful individual like him to be trained on.”
“Why did you instruct me then to have him born here on Dessix? Was it not our aim to allow me to harness the power of the Nihil and not someone else?” The anger within him sweltered again; he could not contain it.
“Even I could not foresee these events; the Nihil does not choose who is strongest and more worthy of wielding its power. I believe this is the result of chance. The boy possesses willpower unmatched by even you; he perseveres where no one else would. The training you are putting him through is far more inhumane than the training your father put you through, even I am sometimes surprised to discover the sheer harshness of your training does not take his life.” The entity paused; Thanatos could feel him leave the room. He tried to reach out, but he was not there anymore.
Thanatos got up; he was not sure what had just happened and preceded to the mausoleum. His ritual consisted of kissing both crypts before going down on both his knees and reflecting. Though before he could go down on his knees, he felt the entity’s essence fill the room around him once more.
“I thought perhaps you would not return?” Thanatos smiled at the thought. There were days where he would be alone, not knowing where the voice had gone, and there were days where it would not leave him alone.
“Perhaps you should have more faith in me.” The entity spat back, unamused by Thanatos’s attempt at sarcasm. “I’ve had a realization…” he continued. “I do not know why I haven’t seen it before, but it is clear to me as the daylight shining bright outside.”
Thanatos was eager to learn this realization. But, due to instinct and not curiosity, he turned to the side where the voice was coming from.
“Ever since you’ve started training that boy, nothing regarding The Void for me felt the same, I believed it must have been due to his genetics, but it is not. The Nihil is drawn to him because of your training. I never believed it was possible, but now it makes sense. The Nihil grows stronger in hopeless situations when the person enduring the hopeless situation remains focused and unmoved by his circumstances. Izzar’s attempt at proving you wrong that he is not weak makes him more susceptible to The Void than you’ll ever be. This mindset will make him extremely powerful. You should have struck him down when you had the chance.”
He feared that he would inadvertently create someone who would instead take the power he sought. However, Izzar was his superior in many aspects due to the training he was exposed to.
“The boy might be your only hope of keeping you alive and the Order standing for another nine thousand years, but he can’t be left alive or discover more power.”
Thanatos cleared his mind; he opened his eyes and looked upon the two stone coffins before him. The possibility of him joining them was growing ever stronger. He closed his eyes once again and focused on Izzar. He could feel the entity had left the room; he was alone.
